29. A Night at the Inn

Chapter 29: A Night at the Inn

Today was the day that Hop Pop calculated that the ice blocking the pass out of the valley was supposed to melt. So we saddled up Bessie and took the long trek northward, only to find… well, that HP had no idea what he was talking about. The pass is still completely frozen, and the ice looks like it's weeks away from melting. HP actually tried to play it like he'd known it all along, but I was there when we went to the archive, one week ago, when he said, I quote, "the mountain pass will clear up in one week."

…ah, whatever, I'm just cranky we made the schlep up for nothing. Now it's late, and we have to go all the way back.

Sprig knew this lagoon nearby where the two of us could poke around for a while, and it turned out to be just what I needed. Nothing like a tangle with some bloodthirsty and surprisingly mobile muck leeches to get the blood pumping… which I suppose is exactly what muck leeches want to begin with, so maybe in this case it's a bad thing? Still, nothing like a surge of adrenaline to brighten up a long day and make the trip not a total loss.

Anyway, we were on our way back to Wartwood when Bessie suddenly stalled out. HP was about to check under her shell to see what was wrong when this huge storm comes out of nowhere… kinda like California, actually… and Bessie started sinking into the mud. So, we're stranded here in the middle of nowhere.

We at least one stroke of luck though. Sprig spotted a B&B a little way off, so we at least had somewhere to stay. Convincing HP was the hard part, since he keeps a tight grip on his coppers, but it got a lot easier once a freak gust of wind carried off our only tent.

The B&B is run by this old horned bullfrog couple and her two sisters, and it's cozy as heck. Oh, best part? I guess this is their slow season, because they gave us four rooms for the price of one! They even towed Bessie to their barn and threw in a plate of cookies to sweeten – see what I did there? – the deal. I wonder if they'll share the recipe?

Anyway, normally Sprig and I would be off to explore the place, but I'm just so exhausted. I guess it has been a long day, and I did just get done running from blood-sucking leaches… and they dd get a little… yeah, a nap couldn't hurt.

I'm just glad I didn't get the creepy doll room. The fam's stayed at a few B&B's here and there while we were on vacation (dad's all about getting there as fast as possible, but sometimes, you just have to stop, and there's always a creepy doll room. And I was usually the one who gets it, because I'm the kid, and kids like dolls, right? So, I'm in an unfamiliar bedroom in the darkness being watched by all these frozen faces in the shadows with their dead eyes. *shudder* At least it didn't happen this time. No nightmares, just a really cozy bed.

Yeah, a nap is just what I need.

I've had my fair share of rude awakenings since coming to Amphibia. But I can safely say none of them compare to waking up roasting on a spit.

Okay, here's the sitch. The kindly old frog family? Cannibals! (Incidentally this marks the second time cannibal frogs have tried to eat me in the space of two months. Even one is too many!) The cookies? Sweet, chewy and laced with knockout drugs! The B&B? A trap for unsuspecting travelers who had no idea they were going to be on the menu! And us? The breakfast in "bed and breakfast"! And no doubt these folks weren't too squeamish about trying exotic meats like me.

So, how did we get out of this one? That's all thanks to Polly. She never had any of the knockout cookies, so when the owners came for her, she was able to escape while the rest of us were gathered up. Man, just imagine if she'd had one of the cookies. We'd be done for. But instead, she dodged four big, vicious cannibals long enough to free us. I honestly couldn't be more proud.

Well, next step was to find Bessie and get the frog outta there, but on the way, I spotted the pantry and decided to leave our gracious hosts a generous parting gift.

So, after doing what I needed to do, I ran off to join the Plantars in the snail stable.

There were a lot of snails. Every last one with one of those metal snap-traps on their foot. Apparently our hosts have been doing this for a while. Each one represented at least one frog that was o longer among the living.

Pretty much any lingering doubts about the little present I'd left our host were gone at that point. These guys definitely had this coming.

So, after we freed all the other snails, the four of us hopped on Bessie and highsnailed it out of there, HP sure that the owners were hot on our snail (Sorry not sorry for using the same pun twice in one sentence). But that's when the little surprise I left kicked in.

You see, while we were escaping the inn, I passed the pantry, and found myself some sacks of baking soda and a big barrel of vinegar. And as any C+ student with a science fair project due tomorrow can tell you, baking soda plus vinegar equals instant volcano. A hole in a sack here, an overturned barrel there, and… well, you get the idea. KABOOM. Ah, well, I'm sure they survived. Probably. Either way, they probably won't be following us, and it's a good bet it'll be a while before any other unlucky guests wind up on the brunch menu.

We finally got home really, really late. It's gonna be nice to sleep in my own room!

In the dark.

All alone.

…yeah, I think just for one night I'm gonna forget that I'm 13 and find myself someone to snuggle with.

A.N.: A short chapter, but Anne was kind of asleep for a lot of it. Actually, I've noticed that while the front half of the season is very much centered on Anne and her growth as a character (with a couple of exceptions like "Sprig vs. Hop Pop"), in the back half there are quite a few episodes where Anne is a supporting character or even a spectator. In fact, while in almost all the early episodes the conflicts were driven by Anne, in the later episodes it's just as likely to be Sprig or Hop Pop. The showrunners clearly felt they had established Anne's character enough at this point that they felt she could take a backseat to others.

What this means is that some of these upcoming episodes will probably be as short as this one.

H: Yeah, at the time Anne just didn't know what an axolotl was. She also didn't care enough at that point to get the exact lineage of HP's cane.

Notthenightslayer: Yeah, agreed. I've honestly really grown to hate the term "filler episode". It's so dismissive of the effort that goes into this show.

Jose: Yeah, Croaker is awesome, I hope she gets some time to shine in "Sasha's Angels".

Schweenieboy: I'm the oldest, so I never really encountered that sort of thing.

Gregorian12: Stay tuned.

Next: Wally and Anne