52. Nicole's Birthday

“Surprise!” Everyone shouted as Nicole walked through the giant doors of Shorty’s.

Nicole’s jaw dropped as she looked around the bar filled with her closest friends and family. “Guys...” She breathed out in shock before giving a light chuckle.

Waverly walked up to her with a giant grin plastered on her face. “Do you like it?”

“You did this?”

Still grinning, the brunette nodded.

“Waves...” she shook her head in awe before reaching out for the girl’s hand and pulling her in closer. “I love it. Thank you.” She leaned in and planted a quick kiss before pulling away and looking around the room. “Thank you, everyone!”

The room was filled with a bunch of ‘happy birthdays’ before Dolls turned the music on and everyone began to dance and socialize. As Nicole and Waverly stood there, holding each other and smiling, Wynonna walked up with a giant glass of alcohol in her hand.

“Haught, put your googly eyes away and drink this.” She shoved the beverage out towards the redhead who took it with a quirked eyebrow.

“What’s this?”

“Something that’ll get you completely smashed.”

“What’s in it?” Nicole eyed it cautiously.

“You don’t want to know. Just drink up, and have fun.” The dark brunette said with a wink as she gently pushed Nicole’s hand holding the glass more towards her.

Nicole looked over at Waverly, as if silently asking for permission.

“Today’s your day, you have fun. I’ll drive us home.”

“Are you sure?”

Waverly nodded with a smile. “You know how much I love drunk Nicole.”

“As do I.” Wynonna added with a toothy grin as she eagerly waited for the redhead to take a sip of the mystery cocktail she had made.

Nicole sighed as she shook her head and raised the glass up in a silent ‘cheers’. “Well, happy birthday to me, I guess.” She said before bringing the glass to her lips and knocking back all of its contents as Wynonna watched with clenched fists of excitement. Nicole brought the empty glass down and grimaced.

“Yes!” The older Earp wrapped one arm around the redhead’s shoulders and with the other gave a strong pat on her stomach. “This is going to be the best 27th birthday party in history!”

Nicole chuckled as she shook her head. “I wish you could drink with me, Earp.”

“Me too, Red. Only nine more weeks until this girlie makes her appearance, at which point I’m taking a night for myself to drink until I pass out.”

“And I’ll be there.”

“I wouldn’t want to drink with anyone else.” Wynonna smirked before releasing the redhead from her grasp and punching her arm. “And we’re not doing it at this place. Nuh uh, we’re going somewhere out of town with a mechanical bull. There’s no way I’m breaking my embarrassing nine-months-sober streak with a boring night at Shorty’s surrounded by the boring crowd that usually comes in here.”

“God, you two are like frat boys.” Waverly said with a look of disapproval, earning a shrug from Wynonna.

Nicole chuckled as she rubbed her girlfriend’s back, smiling at the way Waverly relaxed against her hand. “I’m going to talk a little bit with my party guests before Wynonna gets me too drunk to speak with proper grammar. Do you want to come with me, love?”

“You go. I’m going to hang out with Wynonna for a little bit.” Waverly smiled.

“Okay. Be right back.” She leaned down and gave Waverly a quick kiss before walking over towards Dolls and Lonnie.

“Don’t come back until you’re drunk!” Wynonna yelled, and laughed when Nicole turned around to give her a look of disapproval along with a subtle middle finger behind her back. “So, is birthday girl getting laid tonight? Do I need to make myself scarce?”

Waverly shook her head. “If she’s going to get as drunk as you say she is, then she’ll just fall asleep ten seconds in anyways, so there’s no point in trying. Besides, we had some fun this morning.” She smiled and looked down at the floor as her mind drifted off to the memory of earlier that morning...

“Guess what?” Waverly whispered, gently waking up the redhead.

“Hmm.” Nicole hummed half-asleep with her eyes still closed as she stirred.

“Someone is 27 today.”

Nicole groaned as she took her pillow out from under her head and covered her face with it. “Don’t remind me. I don’t want to be 27.”

Waverly giggled at the sound of Nicole’s muffled voice coming from underneath the pillow. “But do you know what 27-year-olds get?”

“What.” Nicole mumbled as she laid still on her back.

“They get really good orgasms.” Waverly answered in a sultry voice as she slowly walked two fingers down Nicole’s abdomen.

The redhead quickly snatched the pillow off of her face and looked at her girlfriend with a quirked eyebrow. “What kind of orgasms?”

Waverly shrugged. “Whatever kind you want. You get to do whatever you want with me...or have me do whatever you want to you.”

Nicole grinned, but the corners of her mouth quickly dropped into a frown. “I have to get ready for work though.”

Waverly shook her head with a proud grin. “Your alarm won’t go off for another hour.”

“You woke me up an hour early so that we can have sex?”

“Not just any sex...birthday sex.”

Nicole rolled onto her side and supported her head with her left hand with her elbow on the mattress. “I do love birthday sex.”

Waverly grinned as she mirrored Nicole. “So, birthday girl, what would you like to do first?”

“Hmm...” Nicole looked up at the ceiling as she pondered for a few moments before looking back at the brunette with a smirk. “I want to see you touch yourself.”

Waverly chuckled. She wasn’t expecting that request, but if it’s what Nicole wanted, she wasn’t going to argue. She pushed the covers off of her so that Nicole could see her entirely nude body, and brought her hand up to her neck as she crossed her legs and gently stroked two fingers along the skin over her pulse point. “Like this?”

“Mmm, a little lower.” Nicole smirked.

Waverly trailed her hand down to her collarbone and ran her fingers across it. “Here?”

Nicole shook her head and moved Waverly’s hand to one of her breasts. “Here.”

Waverly lightly palmed the mound and played with her hardened nipple as she stared into Nicole’s eyes. Small moans escaped her lips, and Nicole’s eyes widened. The redhead trailed her eyes across Waverly’s body, all the way down past her flexed abdominals, squeezing thighs, and thin legs, before moving back up to her face. “You’re the sexiest woman I’ve ever seen, baby.”

“Yeah?” Waverly asked in a high-pitched voice as she continued to stimulate both of her breasts.

“Yeah. I want to watch you make yourself come.”

Waverly smiled. “You’re the boss.” While keeping one hand on one of her nipples, she slowly trailed the other down in between her legs and ran her fingers though her slick folds. “Ugh, fuck.”

“What do you feel?”

“Wet. I’m completely soaked.” She trailed her fingers up to her awakened pink bud and slowly circled it. “God this feels good.”

“What does?” Nicole could see exactly what Waverly was doing, as she was watching her hand attentively. But hearing Waverly describe what she was doing to herself made it so much more erotic.

“Rubbing my clit. Jesus, I’m so horny and turned on right now. It’s so sensitive.”

“Fuck.” Nicole hissed as she reached between her legs and began stroking her own clit that was throbbing for attention. She watched as Waverly dropped her other hand between her legs and pushed two fingers inside as she began to pump in and out while still stimulating her clit.

“What are you doing now?” Nicole panted as she continued her own ministrations.

“I’m fucking myself. I’m lightly brushing my fingertips against my front wall. A spot that I didn’t even know existed until I met you.” She sighed as a smile formed on her face. “I touch that spot now every time I fuck myself. It makes me think of you and how incredible you are at fucking me.” Her jaw went slack as she moved both of her hands at a quicker pace. “Nicole, I-…I’m going to come.”

Nicole frantically moved her hand faster to match Waverly’s hands on herself as she glued her eyes to the brunette’s center. “Don’t stop baby. I want to see you come.”

“Unghhh, I’m coming baby! I’m coming for you!” Waverly panted as she rocked her hips up into her hands, riding out her orgasm.

Nicole watched with wide eyes as she saw her girlfriend’s center contracting. “Fuck, I can see you coming. God, that’s so hot. Shit.” Nicole closed her eyes and threw her head back as she felt herself getting closer to her own orgasm.

“Are you going to come too?” Waverly asked in a sultry voice while slowly running her fingers up and down her soaked folds, just enjoying the touch of her center after climaxing.

“Uh huh.” Nicole panted.

“Can I feel you? I want you to come on me.”

Without removing her hand from between her legs, Nicole pushed herself up and swung a leg over so that she was straddling Waverly’s stomach. She glided back and forth on the girl’s abdomen painting her arousal on her girlfriend’s body as she frantically rubbed her clit with her hand, until she felt herself nearing the edge.

Waverly laid there with her hands clasped behind her head, watching the whole thing with a huge grin on her face.

“Ughhh, I’m gonna come. Shit. Fuck yeah, baby. Unghhh.” Nicole grunted as she released her arousal all over Waverly’s abdomen. She continued to rock back and forth, still stroking herself as she leaned forward and dropped her freehand onto the mattress beside Waverly for support. “Can you feel it?”

“Yeah baby. I can feel your come all over me.” Waverly replied with a smile. She really loved watching Nicole’s orgasm face, with her eyes shut tight and her brow furrowed as she switched between clenching her strong jaw and biting her bottom lip. She would never tell Nicole this, but she thought it was really cute. Of course, in the thralls of arousal she found it to be more sexy than anything, but right now, laying comfortably on the bed and just enjoying the show in post-orgasm bliss, she found it to be cute.

Nicole jolted a few times as she lazily stroked her overly-sensitive clit until she removed her hand and dropped it on the other side of the mattress. While heavily breathing, she slowly opened her eyes and looked down at her girlfriend.

“Was that good?” Waverly asked with a knowing look.

Nicole raised one corner of her mouth in a half-smile as she nodded. She looked down between her legs and raised herself up, and both women noticed the string of arousal connecting Nicole’s center to Waverly’s abs. The redhead chuckled as she reached down and ran her fingers through the thick fluid before spreading them and looking at all of the little strings that formed as she did so.

“I think you really enjoyed yourself there.” Waverly said with a light chuckle.

“I did.” Nicole laughed as she swung her leg back over to her side and laid on her back beside the brunette.

Waverly lifted her torso and propped herself up on her elbows as she looked down at her girlfriend lying beside her. “Uh, aren’t you going to clean up your mess?” She quirked an eyebrow as she gave a pointed look to the glistening skin of her stomach before looking back at Nicole.

A wide smile slowly spread across Nicole’s face as she sat up and laid on top of Waverly with her head hovering over the girl’s stomach. “Sorry, I’ll get right on that.” She lowered her tongue down and licked all over every inch of the woman’s flexed abdominal muscles until her arousal was completely cleaned up. “Since I’m down here, I might as well clean up your mess too.” She winked as she crawled down and settled in between Waverly’s legs before dragging her tongue all the way up from her entrance to her pleasure point.

“Oh.” Waverly dropped her head down onto the pillow and ran one hand through her hair as the other brushed back and forth along her hipbone. “I thought today…was your…birthday…” she choked out between expert swipes of Nicole’s tongue across her enlarged clit.

Nicole lifted her face up from Waverly’s sex with a smirk. “Trust me, going to town on my girlfriend’s very attractive vagina is the best birthday present ever.”

“Waves.” Wynonna snapped her fingers in front of her little sister’s face, bringing her out of her vivid memory.

“Huh?” Waverly shot her eyes up to her sister’s disapproving face. “Oh, sorry. What were we talking about?”

“Well, before you spaced out and started inappropriately thinking about sex with your girlfriend right in front of your older sister, we were talking about your plans at the house tonight.”

Waverly rolled her eyes. “Don’t act like you don’t talk about sex all the time with me.”

“Uh, yeah, but I don’t just start letting my mind drift to my own sex life right in the middle of a conversation. I mean, I can practically see you dripping from here.”

“You mean drooling?”

“No.”

Waverly gently pushed Wynonna in the arm, who was laughing at her own joke. “You’re so annoying. After the party, I’m putting Nicole straight to bed, so you can stay, or you can go to Doc’s.”

“What if I bring Doc over?”

“Uh, only if there’s no hanky-panky. I would say to just keep it down, but I know that’s impossible for you…”

“Hey, you’re louder than I am!”

“Still. I’m not going to have Nicole’s birthday end with her having to hear you two trying to get pregnant…again.” Waverly stated with a firm finger in her sister’s face before walking off.

“We weren’t even trying to get pregnant in the first place!”

Waverly shrugged as she continued to walk off, leaving Wynonna standing there with a scowl on her face and hand rubbing her stomach. “Don’t worry, baby Earp-slash-Holliday, you’re the best accident that’s ever happened to me. …and I’m definitely teaching you how to stealthily put shaving cream on your Auntie Waverly’s face while she sleeps without waking her up.”

---

“Corner pocket.” Nicole slurred as she tapped her cue stick on one of the corners of the pool table. She carefully lined it up and took a few practice swings before slamming the tip into the cue ball. She watched as the ball smacked right into one of her striped balls, sending it rebounding off the side wall and ending back in the middle of the table.

Wynonna held her baby bump as she shook uncontrollably with laughter. “This is amazing! You’re terrible!”

Nicole glared at her as she threateningly pointed the cue stick in her face. “Yeah well tha’s ‘cause I’m drunk. Wait ’til I’m sober…” She rested her hand on the side of the pool table, but it slipped off, causing her to stumble a bit and having to catch herself on the table.

Wynonna shook her head as she continued laughing. “You know, you don’t have to call the pocket unless it’s the eight ball.” She leaned down to line up her own shot as Nicole stared at her with a furrowed brow, as if she suddenly remembered the rules of pool. Wynonna sunk in her last solid before successfully shooting the eight ball in and winning the game for the third time that night. She tossed her cue stick on the table with a grin. “Looks like I win again, Red.”

Nicole rolled her eyes as she sighed. “Can we do something else now?”

“We still haven’t played the ‘pin the junk on the hunk’ game I set up over there on the wall.”

The drunk redhead squinted at the poster of the naked male posing like a model with a small red target between his legs before grimacing. “Why would I wanna play that?”

“Um, because I bought it to spice up this party? Come on, nobody’s playing it.”

“Prob’ly ‘cause we’re all mature adults, and two of us are les-bi-ans. All except you. ” She poked Wynonna in the chest right below her collarbone. “I don’ wanna try to dizz-li-ly place a cut-out dick on some random nude dude, Wynonna.” She chuckled as she mumbled to herself. “Nude dude…”

Wynonna rolled her eyes and grabbed onto Nicole’s upper arm as she dragged her across the bar. “Come on. We’ll get Waverly and Jetri to play with us.”

Nicole scrunched her eyebrows together. “Who’s Jetri?”

“Robin Jett and Jeremy Chetri, duh. Don’t you know anything about ship names?”

“Like, the Titanic?”

Wynonna rolled her eyes. “You know, drunk you is more fun when you’re failing at pool.” She let go of Nicole when she reached Waverly, Jeremy, and Robin sitting at the bar.

“Hey, how’s the birthday girl enjoying her birthday?” Waverly smiled from her spot on one of the bar stools as she motioned for Nicole to sit on her lap.

“Your sister is being mean to me.” Nicole slurred with a pout. She wrapped an arm around Waverly’s shoulder as the brunette wrapped an arm around her waist.

“Wynonna, stop being mean to my girlfriend.”

“It’s not my fault her coordination and sense of logic sucks when she’s intoxicated.”

“I wanna rematch when I get your post-baby-having ass drunk, Earp.” Nicole stated with a firm finger in the darker brunette’s direction.

Wynonna gave a curt nod. “Deal, Haught-pocket.”

“So, uh, this party is pretty lit.” Robin bobbed his head to the music with a crooked smile.

Jeremy leaned over and quietly said in Robin’s ear, “What did we say about trying to use teenage lingo?”

“To do it sparingly.” Robin replied sadly as he lowered his head in shame.

“That’s the fifth time tonight you’ve used that word.”

“I know, I know.” Robin sighed. “I can’t stop saying it now. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Wynonna stared at the couple with squinted eyes. “Wow. What relationship drama you two have.” She stated sarcastically. “Do you two ever argue about anything real?”

Robin shrugged. “Sometimes he leaves the toilet seat up.”

“So do you…” Jeremy replied.

“Oh yeah.” Robin said with a furrowed brow before playfully grinning at the older Earp. “Then I guess we don’t!”

Waverly chuckled as she shook her head and Nicole looked at them in confusion, not picking up on the joke.

“Speaking of dudes’ junk, do you guys want to play ‘pin the junk on the hunk’ with us? Figured at least you boys would be down.” Wynonna winked at the pair.

Nicole groaned as she dramatically rolled her head along with her eyes before sloppily sliding off of Waverly’s lap and into her own seat. “Wynonna, how many times do I have to tell you, I don’t wanna play any game that involves a man’s wang.” She faked gagged.

“I’ll play.” Waverly shrugged, and Nicole immediately turned to look at her with wide eyes.

“You will?”

“It’s just a game Nicole. It’s like ‘pin the tail on the donkey’ but instead of a tail and a donkey it’s-“

“A penis and a man?” She winced at her own words. “Waves…” She hissed as she leaned down towards the girl with shifty eyes. “We’re gay! ” Even though she was trying to whisper, her volume was much louder than usual.

Waverly rolled her eyes as she stood up from the stool and grabbed onto Nicole’s arm with both of her hands. “It’s just a game, babe. It’s not a real penis. Now come on. It’ll be fun.”

Nicole grimaced as the petite brunette dragged her off towards the poster.

“Yes.” Wynonna fist pumped as she followed everyone in the direction of the game.

Jeremy pursed his lips as Wynonna held the blindfold up towards his face. “You know, I’m a little offended that you think I would enjoy this childish game just because I’m sexually attracted to the male body.”

Wynonna paused as she looked at Jeremy pointedly. “Says the guy who can sense when my boyfriend is in trouble by a feeling in his groin.”

Jeremy pursed his lips before fervently nodding. “Okay, point taken. Proceed.”

As soon as Wynonna finished tying the blindfold behind his head, she handed him the phallic shaped cut-out and spun him around three times. He stumbled over towards the poster and stuck it where he assumed was the right spot. When he took off the blindfold, he couldn’t help but laugh at the penis hanging off of the man’s hipbone. The rest of the gang joined in with laughter.

“Okay, I think Haught is next.” Wynonna took the penis off and handed it to Nicole, who reluctantly took it with a groan, as the older Earp placed the blindfold on her. She spun the redhead around and tried her best to stifle her laughter as the tall, lanky woman stumbled over towards the poster and placed the penis over his chest.

As soon as the sound of laughter reached her ears, Nicole lifted her blindfold off and frowned at the picture.

“Okay, I know you don’t know a whole lot about dick, but it’s a bit lower down than that.” Wynonna stated sarcastically, earning a low growl and a mean look from Nicole.

“I know where it goes.” She spat. “But I’m drunk, and I’m tall. I didn’t realize the poster was that low down.” Nicole slurred drunkenly as she smacked the older Earp on the upper arm before stumbling back over towards her girlfriend.

“Okay, my turn!” Waverly said excitedly. As a child, she was always good at party games, especially ‘pin the tail on the donkey’. And despite the male-centric set-up, this was no different. She grabbed the penis and the blindfold from Nicole and tied the black fabric around her own head. After being spun by her sister a few times, she staggered over towards the poster, took in a deep breath as she stilled her dizzy body, and smashed the item against the poster. She took off her blindfold and grinned when she saw that she had perfectly placed the cut-out right between the man’s legs on the target. “I did it!”

Everyone cheered as Wynonna quirked an eyebrow. “Nicely done, Waves. Are you sure you’re not into that anymore?”

Waverly rolled her eyes. “Wynonna, you know I’m not.”

“Yeah, I’ve given ‘er more orgasms than any guy ever could with his disco-stick! Especially when I use my tongue. Not that my fingers don’t get the job done just as well…” The redhead wrapped her arm around her mortified girlfriend as she looked at her with a smirk.

“Nicole!” Waverly exclaimed in disbelief as her cheeks immediately turned beat red.

“What? I have…” Nicole shrugged, completely unaware of why that was an inappropriate thing to say. As entertaining as Nicole was while she was drunk, she often didn’t have a filter, much to Waverly’s embarrassment.

The older Earp grimaced as she looked between the two. “Okay, I so did not need to hear that.”

“What are we laughing at over here?” Dolls asked with a smile as he coolly waltzed up to the group with his hands in his jacket pocket.

“Oh, just Nicole being drunk and releasing details about her sex life with Waverly.” Jeremy stated casually with a wave of dismissal before pointing at the poster with his thumb over his shoulder. “Do you want to play with us?”

Dolls furrowed his brow at the naked man. “Uh, maybe next round.” He looked over at Wynonna and leaned in towards her as everyone else was occupied chatting. “Hey, um, can we talk?”

Wynonna shrugged. “Yeah, sure.” She turned around towards the group and pointed her finger at all of them as she raised her eyebrows. “It’s my turn when I get back.” She followed Dolls over to the corner of the bar where it was quieter. “What’s up?”

Dolls shifted his weight back and forth uncomfortably. “Um, so I’ve been thinking…I kind of miss you.”

Wynonna sighed. “Dolls, Doc and I are back together, for real this time. I’m having his baby.”

“No, I know. I just…miss you. I miss the adventures we used to go on.”

“Like the ones where I took off my clothes and you took off yours and we got busy in the back seat of your car?” She said with a raised eyebrow.

“No, no.” Dolls chuckled lightly. “I mean, yeah, that was great too. But I was talking about the times we went out to the shooting range, or the times we just hung out and talked during your shift at Shorty’s, or that one time you came over and we just prank called a bunch of random numbers…”

“I’ll bet that one lady is still looking for the raccoon in her walls.” Wynonna laughed.

“Yeah, probably.” Dolls chuckled before clearing his throat. “But see? Those were fun times.”

“Okay, say they were. What’s your point?”

“My point is, that I want us to be friends. I know you’re with Doc now, and I respect that. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends, does it?”

Wynonna shrugged. “I’ve got friends.”

“Well, I don’t.” Dolls stated. “And I don’t see why you can’t have one more.”

“Because, we used to fuck, Dolls. And now I’m fucking Doc.”

“And I’m completely fine with that!”

Wynonna leaned back as she eyed him with doubt. “Are you though?”

Dolls nodded his head and waved his hands around. “I am, I swear. I really just miss hanging out with you. You’re pretty cool, and I just want you in my life…as a friend. ”

The brunette squinted her eyes as she looked into his with hesitation. “I don’t know…”

“Okay, okay. How about this…we hang out, somewhere non-romantic, and if it’s too weird we never have to speak again.” He waited patiently as Wynonna looked off in thought.

“Just friends?”

“Just friends.” He nodded confidently.

Wynonna slowly inhaled through her nose as she nodded. “Alright then. But that means that I get to vent to you about my hormone imbalances, frequent urination, and leaky breasts.”

He pursed his lips as he tried not to grimace. “I would love nothing more.”

“Good. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all, buddy.” She grinned as she patted him on the shoulder before walking back over towards the group. She drew her eyebrows together when she noticed that everyone was in the middle of the bar dancing “Hey, what happened to the game?”

“Nicole wanted to dance.” Waverly rolled her eyes as she nodded over towards the redhead, who was jumping uncontrollably as she flailed her arms around.

“Guys, this is awesome! I love this song! Don’t you love this song?!”

Everyone quirked an eyebrow at her.

“I didn’t realize you were so into Miley Cyrus.” Robin stated with a light chuckle.

Nicole looked at him as she continued to move her body. “Who?”

Robin shook his head and shoved his hands into his jeans pockets. “Never mind.”

“Wynonna!” Nicole yelled when she spotted the older Earp and ran over to where the dark brunette was standing. Nicole noticed a glass of alcohol sitting on the table beside Wynonna and gulped it down, not knowing what it was or whose it was. “Dude, your sister is like, super hot.” She looked around the bar to make sure nobody was listening before continuing in a loud whisper. “I mean that in the gay way. I like boobs. Like, a lot.”

“Um, no shit Sherlock. She’s your girlfriend.” She paused before continuing with a furrowed brow. “And remind me not to breastfeed around you.”

Nicole’s eyes widened. “She’s my girlfriend?! How did that happen?!”

Wynonna shrugged. “Beats me. You worked some sort of lesbian magic on her I guess.”

Nicole nodded as she turned around to look at Waverly, who was laughing about something with Jeremy and Robin. She smiled at how angelic Waverly looked under the light that was shining directly on her. “I’m gonna marry that girl.”

“Okay, whoa.” Wynonna shoved Nicole in the back, causing the redhead to stumble forward into a chair. “Don’t you dare go and do something drunkenly stupid…like propose to my baby sister in the middle of Shorty’s. Or I swear to god, my pregnant ass will beat your drunk one. And if you do end up proposing to her in the very distant future, it better be something incredibly romantic, because that girl deserves at least that.”

“Relax preggers, I meant in the future. I don’t even have a ring on me.” Nicole giggled before her face turned into a serious one. “Wait, do you have a ring I can borrow?”

“No, dumbass!” Wynonna pushed Nicole down into a chair and reached over the bar for a bottle of water before setting it on the table in front of the redhead as she sat down at the table across from her. “You’re not doing anything until you finish that.”

“I just…” Nicole sighed as she stared at Waverly. “I love her so much.”

“So then give her an orgasm. Hell, get her a puppy even. There are other ways to show your love other than jumping straight into marriage. It’s a serious commitment. A seriously legal commitment.”

Nicole turned back to look at Wynonna with a look of determination in her eye. “I’m committed to her.”

“You’re drunk, Nicole.”

“Prob’ly. But I know that what I’m feeling is real. I wanna marry her. And I wanna have kids with her. And a house, and a backyard, and neighbors who think we’re best friends until they see through the fence us having sex in the pool in our backyard, like on The L Word.” She laughed for a few seconds before her eyes widened. “I want a house with a pool.”

“If you have a pool, I’m never getting in it.” Wynonna grimaced at the thought of swimming in a pool that Nicole and Waverly had previously banged in.

“God. Waverly would look so sexy pregnant. Don’t you think she would look sexy pregnant? I wanna fuck her and get her pregnant. You Earps make sexy pregnant women.”

Wynonna pinched the bridge of her nose as she shook her head. This was definitely an example of no-filter drunk Nicole.

“But we should get married first before she gets pregnant. Do you think she wants to marry me back?”

Wynonna sighed and slapped her hands down onto the redhead’s shoulders. “Dude, this is the alcohol talking. Trust me on this one. Sleep it off, wake up in the morning, and call me if you’re still feeling like popping the question, and I’ll happily talk some sense into you. But don’t tell Waverly any of this until then. Understand?”

Nicole nodded. “Okay, fine. I’m starting to feel a little sick anyways.” She furrowed her brow and pressed her palm into one of her temples as she pursed her lips. “Talking is making me wanna puke.”

The older Earp twisted the cap off of the water bottle and handed it over towards the redhead. “Drink this, and I’ll get you a barf bucket.”

Wynonna gave the redhead a couple of pats on the shoulder as she stood up and walked past Waverly towards the back room.

“Is Nicole okay?” Waverly asked as she eyed the redhead sitting at the table.

“I think it’s time to wrap things up here. She’s had a lot to drink.”

Waverly snorted. “Yeah, she was doing the funky chicken earlier. I even managed to get it on video.”

“Um, please send me that.”

“Yeah right! I would never betray Nicole like that.”

Wynonna rolled her eyes. “Then at least let me watch it on your phone later.”

“Okay, fine. Only because it’s too funny not to see.” Waverly laughed.

“I’m going to get her a bucket. She said she was feeling sick, so I think she’s going to hurl at some point within the next couple of minutes.”

“My poor baby.” Waverly frowned at the redhead who was now sitting with her forehead resting on the table. “I’m going to sit with her.”

“Hey Waves?”

Waverly turned around to face her sister. “Yeah?”

“Um, if she says anything…you know, intense, then just ignore her. She’s drunk and doesn’t know what she’s saying right now.”

The younger Earp quirked an eyebrow. “Um, okay?”

“Okay.” Wynonna nodded before heading off towards the storage room.

Waverly shrugged before walking over to Nicole and gently placing a hand on her upper back as she sat down beside her. “Are you feeling sick, baby?”

Nicole lifted her head up and groaned. Her face was pale and her eyes were squinting at the bright light of the room. “Everything is spinning. Oh god, please don’t ever let me drink this much ever again. I’m too old for this.”

Waverly chuckled lightly. “Honey, you’re only 27.”

“Exactly.” Nicole whined as she slowly dropped her head back down onto the table. “I’m getting too close to 30.”

“Other than that, did you enjoy your birthday party?”

Nicole lifted her head back up and weakly smiled. “I did. Thank you. You’re the best wifey ever.” She leaned in and gave Waverly a chaste kiss on the lips.

Waverly looked at the redhead with confusion. “What?”

“I said thank you.”

“You called me wifey…”

Nicole snorted. “No I didn’t. I called you my girlfriend.” Her smile dropped and her face shifted to something more serious. “Did you know that you’re my girlfriend?”

Remembering what Wynonna had said, Waverly shrugged it off. “Yes baby, you’re the best girlfriend. And you deserve to have a special birthday. I love you. Happy birthday, Nicole.” She wrapped her hand around Nicole’s resting on the table.

Nicole grinned at the brunette as she took a sip of her water. “Hey waves.”

“Yeah birthday girl?”

“Can I fuck you tonight?”

“Absolutely not.”

“That’s fair.”