46. I Think this Plane is Homophobic

       “Nicole.” 

       The redhead awoke and lifted her head from the floor in the living room after feeling a sharp kick to the side. “Hmm?” She mumbled, taking in her surroundings.

       “If you don’t get up, we’re gonna miss the flight,” the brunette grumbled, dropping a pile of clothes for her to change into on top of her. 

       Nicole plopped her head back down. “Worst 4th of July ever,” she muttered, cloudy events of the night before slowly coming back to her. They had been stupid. Very stupid. Because they had partied. And not just anywhere. Oh no. A Yacht Club Party. Needless to say, they were both incredibly hungover and reeked of Pina Colada. “How’d we even get back here?” 

       “I dunno. Get up. Seriously. We have to leave in 30 minutes.” 

       Nicole pushed herself to a sitting position, falling sideways against the table with a wince. Her eyes widened. “And I think last night’s about to make a grand entrance.” She got up and stumble-sprinted to the bathroom. Waverly’s eyes squished together, hearing the god-awful sounds filling the condo. She finished putting her hair up in a messy bun and opened the refrigerator, pulling out a water bottle and slumping over to the bathroom, knocking lightly on the door. 

       “You ok, Babe?” 

       “Do I sound ok to you, Waverly?” She pursed her lips, pushing the door open, tapping her on the shoulder with the bottle. “Thanks,” she mumbled, flopping back against the wall, taking a small drink. 

       Waverly dug around in the cabinet, handing her a bottle of pills. “I’m gonna get us an Uber. All your stuff’s already packed and by the door.” 

       Nicole looked up at her with a small smile. “I love you,” she sighed. 

       “You better.” She went back upstairs, gathering the rest of her things, shoving it all in her suitcase to deal with later. She lugged it downstairs and set it next to Nicole’s two bags. “Nic, hurry up!” She groaned loudly, heading back into the bathroom, cursing at her under her breath as she saw her passed out again, slumped sideways against the wall. The fed-up brunette squatted down in front of her, shaking her head around. “Get. Up.”

       Nicole’s eyes blinked open. “‘M ‘wake, I ‘romise.”

       Waverly stood, yanking her to her feet and dragging her back to the living room. “I know you don’t feel good. Trust me, I don’t either. But, if you don’t change out of these nasty ass clothes and start hauling some ass, I swear on Pikachu the Hamster that I will leave you here because I have gotten 14 texts and 5 calls from Wynonna in the last 24 hours asking when I’ll be home today! So, please, Sweetheart, can you do this for me? Please.” 

       Nicole nodded her head, grabbing her clothes that were now on the floor. “Yea, Waves, I’m moving.” 

       She let out a breath. “Thank you.” The redhead gave her a smile, heading back to the bathroom to try and make herself look halfway decent. 

       A few minutes she returned, hair hiding underneath a beanie. “I’m ready,” she mumbled, rubbing her hands up and down her freshly washed face. 

       “Our ride is . . .” The smaller girl looked down at her phone. “5 minutes out.” Nicole nodded, curling up next to her on the couch. “What’s gonna happen with your car?” 

       “I gotta guy,” she informed slightly muffled by the way her head was stuffed against her chest. Waverly did a long nod, assuming that guy was the one who smoothly pulled up right in front of them last week. She thought back to all the things they had done. Screwing around in the pool here at the condo. Driving to LA, then to Hollywood, then to the beach. Their all-day trip to Disneyland. Watching the Bellagio Fountain Show back here in Nevada. Dedicating a whole day to going through every museum Vegas had to offer, it seemed. Walking the Vegas strip, which also included babbling to Nicole about all of her weird history facts that she had stored somewhere up in her brain. Going to see the Blue Man Group perform, the redhead branding it the weirdest and coolest thing she had ever seen. 

       Not to mention all the shopping they did, much to Waverly’s rejection. But Nicole insisted with many of her bumper sticker monologues about how much she meant to her and how she’d get her anything her heart desired. 

       And the food. They swore they had a new favorite restaurant almost every day. 

       But, weirdly enough, her favorite thing from throughout the trip had nothing to do with any exhibits or shows or museums. Not even the food, though that was a close second. Her favorite thing was spending a whole week with Nicole. In the same house. It felt almost natural to her. There was no having to leave to pack a bag. No deciding on whose house they should stay at. Everything that they needed was right there. It got her thinking . . . what if every day could be like this?

       The brunette was torn from her thoughts at the sound of her phone dinging on her lap, their Uber texting her that he was there. “Ok, Nic, let’s go.” She stood up off the couch and held a hand out for the taller girl, who whined a complaint. “Nicole,” she warned, the sound of her wearing patience coming through. The redhead begrudgingly took her hand, picking up her two bags and sulking out the front door, groaning at the bright sun. After they got everything in the back of their Uber’s car, they hopped in the back, heading off to the airport. 

       “Rough 4th?” The man asked, looking back at them through his rear-view mirror. 

       “You could say that,” Waverly sighed, running her hand along the Officer’s side. 

       “Well, if it makes you feel any better, you two aren’t the worst I’ve seen this morning.” 

       Waverly laughed lightly. “I can only imagine.” 

       “Oh, trust me, you don’t wanna.” She saw him shiver. Nicole even laughed a little at that. The man respected their hungover state and kept conversation to a minimum for the majority of the drive, wishing them luck as they climbed out at the airport. 

       “Thanks for the ride,” Nicole mumbled as she grabbed Waverly’s suitcase out of the back, handing it to her. 

       “It’s not like it’s my job or anything,” he chuckled. She smiled, closing the hatch, giving it a pat. He pulled away and the girls headed inside to get checked in. 

.  .  .

       “It’s ok, Wave,” Nicole soothed, kissing the top of her head. 

       “I hate it,” she cried, gripping onto her arm for dear life as another rock of turbulence shook the plane. 

       “I know, Baby. I’m sorry.” Their day had not been great to put it lightly. First, their flight got delayed for 3 hours. Then, they got seated right in front of a sobbing toddler. And to top it all off, they had turbulence throughout most of the flight so far and they were only an hour in. The brunette let out a whimper, looking up at her with teary eyes. Nicole pushed her hand through her hair. “Hey. You know what we’re gonna do when we land?” 

       “What?” Waverly sniffled. 

       “We’re gonna go back to the Homestead. And we’re gonna get some sleep. And then Gus is gonna wake us up after she’s fixed up some dinner. We’re all gonna eat and listen to Wynonna make fun of Doc. And then listen to Gus yelling at Wynonna for making fun of Doc.” Waverly let out a little giggle. “How’s that sound, Babe?” She asked with a smile. 

       The smaller girl snuggled in closer to her side. “Sound’s amazing,” she sighed. 

       “Yea?” 

       “Yea.” Nicole tipped her head up for a kiss. “I just really wish you wouldn’t have given that kid behind us your iPad,” she mumbled into her lips, pinching her side. 

       “It shut him up, didn’t it?” Waverly rolled her eyes at her. “Plus his dads slipped me a 20, so . . .”

       “Dads? As in plural?” 

       “Yes, Love,” she chuckled. Another wave of turbulence shook through the plane. 

       “I think this plane is homophobic,” Waverly huffed. The Deputy snorted, wrapping her arm tighter around her. 

.  .  .

       “Where are they?!” Wynonna demanded, slumping back against the railing in the Calgary airport. 

       “Would you chill out, Girl? They’ll be here when they’ll be here,” Gus grumbled. Wynonna looked towards her, crossing her arms. Her attention was brought back to the gate they were standing in front of when she saw people starting to walk through it. With one glance at a tuft of red hair under a beanie, she was sprinting. 

       “WAVES!” She jumped onto her sister, knocking her to her back. Waverly let out a pained groan, slowly wrapping her arms around the ecstatic brunette as she got some air back in her lungs.

       “Wynonna,” she said, still a little winded. 

       “I MISSED YOU!”

       Waverly rolled her off of her, standing up. “I missed you, too, Wy,” she smiled. Nicole pulled out of Gus’ hug with a smile. A smirk crept up on the older Earp’s face as she snuck up behind her, pulling her into a headlock, ripping the beanie off of her head and giving her the hardest noogie known to mankind. 

       “HAUGHT SHIT!” 

       The redhead groaned, pawing at her arms. “Wynonna!” Gus and Waverly chastised. 

       “You remember how I’m a cop, Earp?” Nicole choked out. 

       “Wha-” Nicole gripped the arm around her neck, flipping her over her back, slamming her into the ground. “OOF!” 

       “Miss me?” She asked with a shit-eating grin. 

       “Not in the slightest,” she grimaced.

       Nicole helped her to her feet, snatching her beanie back. “Didn’t think so,” she smirked, knocking her with her shoulder. Wynonna smiled, bumping her back as they walked towards the exit. 

       “I was for sure you two were gonna come back married,” the older Earp sighed. Waverly’s eyes widened towards her. 

       “Nope. Nonononono, not again,” the Officer blurted. 

       “So, what did you do. Besides fucking. I know that is how you spent at least 50% of your time.” 

       Nicole snapped her head towards her. “HEY! . . . Only like 20%, who do you think we are?” 

       Waverly’s face reddened with embarrassment as the two laughed their asses off, Gus looking around, pretending she wasn’t listening. “Nicole!” She barked. 

       The redhead looked timidly towards her girlfriend. “Sorry,” she mumbled. They walked silently for a minute or two. 

       Waverly glanced between what was ahead of her and the two girls beside her a few times. “It was at least 25,” she muttered. The duo looked toward her, small smiles slowly growing on all of their faces. Wynonna was the first to snort, the couple quickly breaking after. Gus shook her head, guiding them out to the car once they exited the building. Nicole and Gus stacked their bags in the back of the car, all piling in, Wynonna and Nicole in the back this time. 

       30 minutes into the drive, Waverly looked back to her girlfriend. “Nic, I’m cold,” she mumbled, sticking her lip out. Nicole furrowed her brows at her before looking down at herself, remembering she was wearing a hoodie. She pulled it off, handing it to the smaller girl, who slipped it on with a giggle, blowing her a kiss. 

       “Jeez,” Wynonna said under her breath, shaking her head as she looked toward her. 

       “What?” Nicole questioned, cocking an eyebrow. 

       “You would have just given her your shirt if you weren’t wearing that,” she sighed. 

       “Mm, you'd like that, wouldn't you?” She cracked, waggling her eyebrows. 

       Wynonna threw her a look, eyes quickly widening as she grabbed her arm. “Holy shit, Ginger Snap, did you tan?! I didn’t know that was possible with your kind!” 

       “That happens when you go to the ocean,” Waverly said from the front, the smirk on her face obvious from her voice. 

       “You went to the ocean?” Wynonna asked softly, sadness from jealousy almost evident. 

       “We did,” Nicole confirmed, digging her phone out of her pocket. “Wanna see?” She showed her her lock screen, which was one of the pictures the man had taken of them in front of the sunset. 

       “Aw,” Wynonna cooed. She quickly cleared her throat. 

       “Wynonna has feelings?” Gus questioned with a chuckle. Waverly laughed, giving her a high five. The brunette glared at the back of her head from the backseat. 

       “That . . . That’s . . .” She lowered her voice to an almost-whisper. “That’s cute.” 

       Nicole smiled, passing her phone up to Waverly to show Gus. “Why thank you, Wynonna.” 

       “That is too sweet!” She gushed. “Who took that?” 

       “The guy who’s neck Nicole almost slit,” Waverly laughed. 

       “Hey now,” she defended. “You don’t just sneak up on someone like that!” Waverly smiled at her as she handed her phone back. 

       “Ok, you two. What do you want for supper? I’ll make whatever y'all want,” Gus said, looking back at Nicole through the mirror. The redhead shifted her eyes towards the brunette. Waverly raised her eyebrows twice and Nicole mimicked her. 

       “Lasagna,” they both said at the same time, giggling at each other from their silent agreement.

       The older woman chuckled. “Lasagna it is!” She smiled. 

.  .  .

       “Ok,” Nicole sighed, walking back down the stairs at the Homestead after carrying their last bag up. “Gus, you know I’d help you, but if I don’t sleep a little, I might die. And I don’t think your niece would appreciate that.” 

       “I would not!” Waverly shouted from upstairs. 

       Gus looked towards her with a smile as she stirred something on the stove. “Go on, Dear. I wasn’t going to let you help, anyway. You’re on vacation until tomorrow.” She gave her a wink and Nicole smiled with a nod, trotting back upstairs.

       She dropped down face-first onto the bed, sucking in a deep breath. “I love the smell of your bed,” she mumbled, pulling a cover over herself. “It smells just like you.” 

       “Is sniffing me one of your hobbies?” Waverly asked, laying down beside her. 

       Nicole shifted her body, head now resting on her chest. She sucked in another breath. “Mhm,” she confirmed sleepily with a dimpled smile that the brunette couldn’t help but run her thumb over. She chuckled lightly, but sleep quickly pulled them under its spell. 

.  .  .

       “Wynonna!” Gus called. The brunette stood up from the couch, walking into the kitchen. 

       “Yea?” 

       “Can you go wake the girls up for me? Supper’s just about ready.” Wynonna nodded, walking over to the cabinets, pulling two metal lids out. “Wynonna,” Gus grumbled. 

       “C’mon, I haven’t got to screw with them all week!” 

       The older woman sighed. “Go on.” Wynonna giggled, clomping up the stairs, Gus shaking her head as she set the table. Wynonna peeked her head into Waverly’s room, finding Nicole splayed out spread eagle halfway hanging off the bed and the smaller girl in the same position on the other side. She crept quietly to the end of the bed with a huge smirk before banging the lids together as hard as possible. 

       Nicole rolled off the bed, falling hard onto the floor and Waverly let out a shriek, yanking the blankets over herself. “What the hell, Wynonna!” She hollered when she pulled the blanket away, hearing her cackling. 

       “You better be glad the shotgun is on that side, Earp,” Nicole grumbled, sitting up and rubbing her shoulder. 

       “I missed messing with your dumbasses,” Wynonna sighed, calming down her laughing fit. “Dinner’s ready, by the way.”

       The couple glared at her as she walked out of the room. “You ok, Love?” Waverly asked as the redhead pulled herself back up on the bed. Nicole pulled the t-shirt sleeve up on her left arm, a reddening bruise already forming at the top of her shoulder. The brunette tutted, running her thumb across it. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled. 

       She shrugged, rolling her shoulder around as she stood up. “It’s fine,” she sighed. Waverly crawled off the bed and they walked downstairs, sitting down at the table. 

       “Feeling better?” Doc asked, taking a seat next to Wynonna. 

       “Uh-huh,” Waverly yawned, leaning forward onto her arm. Nicole stood up, walking around the table. She grabbed Wynonna’s chair by the seat and the back, tipping it sideways, sending Wynonna to the floor. 

       “Whoops!” 

       “That hurt, ya Dickhead,” the brunette complained, standing up. 

       “Oh did it? I’m sorry,” Nicole frowned sarcastically. She flipped her off, righting her chair and sitting back down. The Officer walked over to the fridge. “Beer anyone?” She heard a yes from everyone but the older Earp. “Wynonna?” 

       “I’m good.” 

       Nicole cocked an eyebrow. “Are you ill, Dear?”

       Wynonna threw her a look. “No. I just don't want one,” she shrugged. 

       “Ooooook,” the Deputy sighed, passing one around to everyone else. They all began to eat, their whole dinner filled with Nicole and Waverly’s stories from their trip. 

       After they were finished, the couple had gone upstairs to shower while the other two helped Gus clean up. “Where are we staying tonight?” Waverly asked, running a towel through her hair. 

       “I need to go get CJ from Nedley still, so . . . My house?” Nicole suggested, pulling a shirt over her head. 

       “Fine with me,” Waverly sighed. Her face lit up all of a sudden. “OO! And we can bring him his mug!” They had bought Nedley a mug in the shape of a donut because the redhead insisted it was “a need, not a want.” 

       Nicole smiled. “I forgot about that . . . We should give them their shit before we leave then, yea?” Waverly nodded vigorously, happy clapping as she yanked clothes up her body. 

       “Ok, c’mon!” She rushed back into her room and pulled all of the things they had bought out of her suitcase, handing some of it to Nicole, who placed it all in a bag. They walked downstairs and gathered everyone in the living room. 

       “So. To prove to ya’ll that we aren’t totally heartless people, we come bearing gifts,” Nicole smirked. Wynonna’s eyes widened at that. 

       “Doc first,” Waverly said pulling the first gift out of the bag. She handed it to him and he looked it over. It was a flask in the shape of a revolver. 

       “Well, by golly, I thought I had been through the mill, but this is the dandiest thing I have ever seen!” He looked up at the girls with a big smile. “Thank you!” 

       “You’re welcome,” the brunette giggled. “Now, Gus. I know you may have a teeny tiny obsession with chocolate so . . .” Nicole handed her a 5-pound container of M&M’s from M&M World. She smiled sweetly up at them.

       “And since Waverly has stolen almost every blanket in the house . . .” The redhead pulled out a blanket, unrolling it to reveal all the M&M characters on the front.

       “Hey!” Waverly smacked Nicole’s arm. She laughed, handing the blanket to the older woman. 

       “Thank you, girls. I love it,” she smiled. They both looked towards a very excited Wynonna. 

       “I know better than anyone else that an Earp is not an Earp without her whiskey.” She reached in the bag, pulling out a bottle of whiskey in the shape of a skull. Wynonna took it, looking down at it with wide eyes. 

       “Fantastic!” She said with a broad smile. Nicole saw something hiding behind her eyes. The Wynonna she knew would have popped the bottle open then and there. But she just looked down at it, biting her lip. She squinted at her. 

       “Hey, Earp, can I talk to you about something before we go?” She asked.

       Wynonna looked up at her, standing up from the arm of the couch. “Sure, wha-” The Deputy grabbed her arm, dragging her to the other side of the house. 

       “What’s your deal?” She asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

       Wynonna’s eyes traced over her face. “Deal? I don’t have a deal, what's your deal?” 

       “You have turned down alcohol twice now. That’s not normal for you.” 

       Wynonna pursed her lips. “What? I’m not allowed to not drink if I don’t want to. And I didn’t turn this down. I love it!” 

       Nicole tipped her head. “Oh yea? Drink some then,” she challenged. 

       Wynonna’s eyes widened. “No.”

       “Why not?” 

       “Because I don't want to!” 

       “You are Wynonna flipping Earp! You always want to drink!” 

       “Well, now I don’t,” she mumbled. 

       The Officer threw her arms out in front of her. “Why?!-” Her face softened with the flash of sadness she saw blink through the other girl’s eyes. It suddenly hit her. “Wynonna . . . Are you-” 

       “Shush!” Wynonna pressed a finger to her lips, wide-eyed. “Don’t say that word!” She shuddered.