Help me

"SHE IS IN DANGER!"

"SHE LEFT YOU." He screamed at my face, trying to wake me up. "SHE IS LOOKING FOR YOU WHEN SHE GOT IN TROUBLE. SHE IS TAKING ADVANTAGE OF YOU. GO AND SAVE HER. COME BACK HERE AND DRINK YOUR REST OF YOUR LIFE. DIE SOBBING OVER HER. THAT IS YOUR FATE. SHE WILL LEAVE. SHE WANTS YOUR HELP. SHE WON'T CARE OTHERWISE."

"SHE WON'T DO THAT… to me…" My voice faded into a whisper. She did.

Theo sighed, walking to me and grabbing me by my shoulder.

"She already did that to you. She is using you. Just think, a girl is using Ace! It would have been normal if it was Austin. You are Ace and besides..." his voice changed from comforting to threatening. "...she will continue living with her husband; leaving you behind... to grieve till death..."

I froze. I looked at him with wide eyes. What he is saying is right. She loves someone else. Why won't I understand it? I must not disturb their life. All I will get is hurt. I will be left hurt, with regret.

"She is waiting for you to save her from the ministry so that she can live the rest of her life with her husband happily," he continued. "She is taking advantage of you. Don't believe her words like a fool. That was your past. Now you are Ace. You are a fighter, not someone's play doll. I won't allow you to be played by anyone. Bring back my Ace, I don't want to see this Austin anymore." He paused, waiting for my reaction. When he didn't got it, he sighed, " I will get you something to drink_"

"Don't bother." I cut him off and walked out of the bar. I am not going to be blind to her doings. I am not Austin anymore. I am Ace. I am Ace. I AM ACE. Why can't I accept it?

I walked to my apartment.

"Austin, look what i got_"

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" I screamed at the face of Thomas. Why does everyone want to get on my nerves?

I walked up to my room and slammed the door shut behind me. I walked impatiently around the room. My jaw clenched at the thought of Emma. She wants to take advantage of me so that she can live happily without me huh? I will show her what this pathetic Austin can do. I will make her pay, to beg my mercy.

Theo is so right. Love makes people blind and weak. That's why Theo is not blind. He is strong and he helped me to see the truth too. I can't believe I really thought of going to save her. I fell into her trap, didn't I? That's what she wanted. I am such a fool. I still have a part of Austin inside me. I should get him out first.

I walked in the alleyway. I should do something. My anger is bubbling inside me. I should let it out and kill someone. There is someone walking in this alleyway other than me. Whoever it is, you chose a very bad day for a walk. I conjured my beast from a cart that lay there.

I walked ahead my beast, my eyes glowing red. I am not going to let the Austin part of me get in my way. No one can stop me now. I am Ace. Why can't I completely turn into Ace?! Why am I hesitating? I can't do this, no I can't kill someone innocent. I can't. But I should. I know I should. Maybe I will get used to it eventually. I should start being Ace. I should embrace the title, which I still haven't accepted wholly. That's what Theo wants. He wants me to be Ace.

But wait…

What do I want me to be?

I stopped in my tracks. I never wanted to be Ace in the first place. I just wanted to get out of Riverlook. I became Ace because I didn't have any choice. I was forced to. I don't know why am I forcing myself this much? What am I trying to prove? What was I trying to do by killing someone? That I am a beast? That my parents did right by locking me up?

When did I become so greedy for money? What am I going to do with money? How have I changed so much? I loved to paint. I don't remember the last time I picked up a paint brush. I know how happy I was while painting. I lost myself in the struggle to become someone else for someone. I wanted a peaceful and happy life. But I ended up being a murderer. Yeah, I am just a serial killer. Some rude and heartless killer whose first priority is money. I became so aimless. I am feeling ashamed of myself. I am worthless. Theo just gave it a cool title: assassin. It was him who was always taking advantage of me. I only get what he gives. I don't even know what is the price tag he gave for Ace. He doesn't want me to leave. Because he knows that I am not going to return. Well played Theo. Wonder how much you have already earned with me.

"AUSTIN!"

I looked up to see Thomas. He was pointing behind me, looking pale.

Oh yeah. There is a beast behind me. Thomas looks so terrified. I was planning on killing HIM? I could never do that. I could never ever kill Thomas and I could never ever hate Emma. I love her. I still do. Even though she loves someone else.

I have been killing someone's Thomas and someone's Emma all these time. I can't live happily without both of them. How can others too? Theo never loved anyone. He lives alone. How is he supposed to know my pain when he has nothing to relate it to? I shouldn't have expected him to allow me to go. Without Theo's permission I can't leave this place. I will die. Why is everything so complicated?

Well, I have rather important things to take care right now.

Thomas.

"Ok calm down now, Thomas."

"But Austin, it's Ace's…"

"Well, I can't tell you directly." I said. I am not allowed to talk about it directly. But I can let him figure it out himself, right? "I am not dead yet, Thomas, and that means…?"

I waited for Thomas's intelligence to work. He is so slow. His grandma got it right the second she got the clue. Make it fast, Thomas.

"You are Ace?!" Thomas asked after what felt like hours, looking confused and surprised as ever. I chuckled at his face.

"You look so idiot right now." I laughed at his face as the beast turned back into the cart.

"Yeah" He said.

There he goes...

"I am an idiot. I have always been an idiot." His voice rose, "I thought we were supposed to be best friends." He is so angry at the betrayal. "I don't want to talk to you anymore!" He walked past me and I ran up to catch up.

"Come on, Thomas. Don't be this heartless to me. I am going to cry." His pace fastened. He is standing his ground. "Wait up! I would have told you if I could. I am not allowed to."

"Whatever." He walked to the apartment and I followed him.

"Thomas." He is not looking at me. He is angry and disappointed. But there is something more important going on. He is the only person I can talk to. "Can I talk to you?"

He noticed my sudden change of voice. He understood the seriousness. I am serious. I am confused by my thoughts. He is the only person whom I want to talk to. He is the only person who can help me. I never knew I was this clever. But I am sure, with the help of Thomas, I have a plan that may work out.

"Only you can save me. I need your help" My voice dropped into a plea. He was looking over at me, confused. I know I look miserable. Because I am.

"Help me..."