Cursed

I stood there watching them three read the letter. I felt hollow. I am lost somewhere. I don't want to live if she dies. She wants me to move on? What a joke!

She loved me all along. I shouldn't have left. She has been living in regret. She has never been happy. She was blaming herself for what I did. She hoped that I was living my best life. Little does she know that I was killing people and I am ashamed to say that I enjoyed it. I am the worst person to be with. Only she can change me back to human.

I didn't even think of her or of what she might have felt. I was so filled with myself. I was being so selfish, believing she is the one guilty here. She was living dead. She had no one. She waited for me to come back. At some point, she lost every hope and decided to surrender to the ministry. She lost hope on me.

They turned her into one of the people in Riverlook who believes whatever they are told to. She accepted their words and went to die. She lost her hope. She left all her dreams behind. What were her dreams? I don't even know her. I never asked about her dreams or hope. I just filled her with mine. I was so filled with myself that I didn't even care about her thoughts and likes. I am the cruel person here. Worse than my parents...

Emma is happy that she saved me. And what was I doing after escaping? I am killing people! I am a bloody assassin! She would have regretted more, if she knew what I became. Thank God she didn't know. She will be so hurt. She would most probably hate me. I have already done enough in hurting. I am a very cruel person and I call myself a lover?

Theo pulled me into a hug, suddenly, catching me off guard. But I stood still trying my best to not break down. Is she going to the torture room? She will be in pain! She will be crying. She will be screaming for help. She will be sad with the whole regret. She will be wishing for death. Like I did.

A sob escaped my lips. Theo hasn't let me go from the hug. No one would ever expect such a move from Theo. Even though, this is not helping. That is not going to help. Nothing in this world can help me. I am dead. I died. Another sob came and I broke down to tears.

"She said she is sorry…" I sobbed, "...I am the one who left her. I left her alone, Theo. She is thinking that her purpose was to save me. But what have I been doing?! I am a bloody assassin! She wasted her time on me. I am such a bad person, Theo. Kill me, Theo. KILL ME!" I cried out. "I don't want to live anymore. She is dying. She will be sad that she hurt me. She is_"

"It's ok" Theo said, "We will save her."

"I left her alone!" I said, shaking my head. "I am not meant to be saved. I am not meant to be happy." She was the one who should be alive instead of me. If my parents decided to kill me when they heard that I was the curse, everything would have been well, I wouldn't have been an assassin, she wouldn't have been the reason for the curse, as there is no more curse. My parents chose the wrong option. I should have died.

"She said the whole world is against our love. Ours is a cursed love." I scoffed. "Yes it is. I am the most cruel person in this world. She is the most kind person. We can never be together, NEVER! I AM NOT MEANT TO BE WITH HER! I DON'T DESERVE HER. I AM NOT WORTH IT. I AM BETTER OFF DEAD. KILL ME, THEO."

Theo hugged me tighter, rubbing my back in an attempt to comfort me. But the pain is inside, in my heart. No one can do anything to make me feel any better. I am better off dead.

"You are not alone here, mate." Thomas said, "We are a team. We will save her. As if it's the last thing I do."

"HOW?! SHE IS LOCKED IN THE MINISTRY! I CAN'T DO ANYTHING. I'M USELESS." I cried. "She is alone in there...Crying for help." I scoffed, "I don't even know why she loves me!"

"SHUT IT!" Mabel screamed. "Theo, help him up. We are going to your home."

"Why?" I asked.

"Your father is the minister of this goddamn place, you idiot! We can do something using him."