Chapter 7 - THE PORTRAIT

(THE POTRAIT) – SINFUL RIVER OF DREAMS

‘What you give is what you receive’. One thought which crosses our minds as we carelessly wander in time, fearful of the repercussions which are to follow from our own deeds, but even fear itself is never enough to entice our hearts towards a safer side.

Taking out a piece of paper, Messie opened her mouth and a place the mint, which was in her mouth with care, as she looked at Anna and said, “Would you care for a mint?” and with fully blown opened eyes Anna declined curiously and stated that bitter things are not meant to be taken, as life is beautiful when given to its sweeter side.

“So, I reckon there was a suicide note beside your sister which she kept as she took her life? Can you tell me more about it? Maybe she left a clue or a reason for her sudden death in it.” Messie said as she tried to find the crux of late Jessica’s rebellious behaviour. And with nothing but a simple laugh, Anna opened her backpack, she opened it slowly and she took spontaneous glances at Messie, when she succeeded in opening the bag, she took out a piece of chocolate, chucked it inside her mouth and slowly made blessed sounds of enjoyment.

She acted as if a piece of heaven had entered her mouth and blessed her with its beauty inside and mouth by its scrumptious taste. Anna then paused and looked at Messie with an amused smile and said, “Jess had this game she loved to play, it called ‘FIND THE PORTRAIT’. It’s a game that depends on the object that was missing, you had to guess what she wanted to say by reading a single message she writes, and by guessing her words you would be able to find the object.

Funny thing was that she gave me the hardest game that night, and because of that I haven’t been able to find the object she wanted me to find. So no, she didn’t leave any suicide note. But I did try to look for the Diary she was holding that night, and as much as I looked for it sincerely, the more blacked out I became, as it disappeared completely from her room, and I haven’t been in her room for a week now.”

The room was then quite for a while, as Messie worked hard to try and figure out how and why Anna and Jess had the kind of connection they had, even as sisters’ other people can’t fully co-exist equally the way Jess and Anna had been doing for years. As much as she was baffled by the news, the expression on Anna’s face was the one to beat, she looked as though something which was as equal as her life had been taken away from her, she had the face of a person who had been starved of life long enough he/she could kill to earn it back.

Messie couldn’t help but ask, “What’s going on with your face, you look constipated, what’s wrong, discuss it with me before it kills you inside.”

“I’m a little worried about something, what if there wasn’t an actual reason behind her sudden suicide after all, what if she just wanted to end it all. Its not surprising really, she had to live alone for 15 years anyway, so why wouldn’t she join her better half? I still believe she was happy leaving, her smile still speaks strongly in my mind, and that image has and will always be beautiful to me.” Said Anna as she picked up her teddy from the sofa and placed it on her lap once again. As Messie redyed herself to ask the next question Anna said, “wait, you don’t know about Xavier, do you? now you see, Jess was born with a twin, my parents first kids, Jessica, and Xavier Croxley, they were very beautiful kids and normally like any other twins, they were extremely close to the point that they would feel each others’ emotions without discussing it. Unfortunately, when the twins were five years old one of them had an accident, and although I’m still not sure what really happened, Jessica was never the same after losing Xavier. Mother said that she never celebrates her birthday, and when they asked why she didn’t want to celebrate it, she said she couldn’t celebrate it fully as half doesn’t belong to her.

Although I have only known her for ten-years, she’s never smiled with her heart even once, ... not once had she been beautiful inside and out, she lived too pitifully, yet she has been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. So, I don’t think she needed a reason to do it, call it my intuition if you will, but I just think it was time she did it. What do you think was in Jessica’s mind when she started cutting her wrist with the knife Doctor Messie?” Anna said with swollen as, looking as if she hadn’t taken a single wink of sleep for days, contemplating about her whole existence, and with all that happened in her mind, her tears refused to let themselves go, leaving behind the urge she tried her hardest to cultivate fully, for it to manifest into its beautiful cause. Yet still there was not even a single tear in sight, with all the panting and each palpitation which stroke at her sharply, her eyes quickly turned, with blood shots on each finally tears started rushing down her face uncontrollably. She faced the floor for the tears to flow fearlessly and unrestricted, yet that made no difference as she was still not able to stop herself from weeping.