63. Chapter 63

Castle corners her in the bathroom as she changes into her swimsuit, the long, naked length of her torso revealed to him in a flash before she ties the top of the two piece around her neck. He sighs, takes over the job from her fingers, adjusts the knot so that it doesn't lay against the vertebra at her neck. He presses his mouth against her cool skin, brushes his hand down her bare side, skirting scars and smooth abs, resting at the waistband of her swimsuit.

"What're you doing?" she murmurs, turning her head to look at him. Her eyes are already that drowsy brown, the pupils dilating even as she speaks.

He dips his fingers beneath the material, grinning when her skin ripples under his palm.

"Wanted to make sure you were okay." She dances an eyebrow up, slides her hand along his forearm. He rests his chin on her shoulder, looking at her in front of the bathroom mirror. "And if you're not okay, I'm offering to help make you okay."

She resonates with laughter, a trembling and low sound that doesn't carry any of the grief she held earlier. He's grateful for that, twitches his fingers to remind her of where he is, what he wants (or rather wants for her), but she grips his arm, shakes her head against his chest.

"Kids are-"

He sighs. "Kids are fine. But yeah." Not entirely responsible, is it? "Still. Later?"

"Oh yeah," she murmurs, turning against him, tugging his arms around her waist to make certain he can't do anything more. How little she knows-

When his hand drifts, she laughs and nudges him away with her hip. "Behave. Allie and Rafe are waiting on us. And the little ones are probably done eating."

"The little ones can entertain themselves." Castle squeezes, feels her sharp intake, all this lovely bared skin, the color in her cheeks.

"I don't want another trip to urgent care," she says, but he can hear the way she clings to control, barely.

But she's right. "Me either, actually." Castle slides his palms up the narrow curves of her waist, warms her shoulder blades with his fingers. He's not exactly crazy with desire, but he'd like to touch her, just. . .just touch her until she falls apart, lets go. A stolen moment in the bathroom will have to do.

He leans in even as she's lifting up on her toes for him; their mouths meet, perfectly aligned, knowing exactly what to do and where to go, how to taste, stroke, which angle to use. It's so easy to make it good, so easy to get it right, and she gives back in equal amount, his skin flushing hot and permeable to her touch.

Kate breaks away from him, her forehead resting against his cheek, her hips bracketed by his. He smooths his hands down her back, over and over, stroking down as if gentling her. She breathes against him, resting, the moment cooling as it goes on.

"Mommy! Mommy!"

He laughs when he feels her startle, cups her neck with his fingers to leave her one last kiss, thoughtful and warm, before letting her go. "Little ones are demanding your attention, Mommy."

She brushes her hands over his hips as she steps back, her lips pressed together, watching him. Then she moves in quickly, kisses him hard, an awkward kiss, noses crashing together, her teeth catching his lip, disconcerting and intense and-

over.

"For later," she grins, then winks evilly at him and heads into the bedroom, grabbing the beach wrap from the bed.

"Later better be sooner," he calls, but follows her out.

Ellery refuses shoes again, so Castle - like a good daddy - carries her down the boardwalk while Kate holds Dashiell's hand. Her son skips at her side, tugging on her arm, but it truly doesn't bother her like it would have last week. Vacation has been good for her. She smiles down at Dash's excitement, then scans the beach ahead for Allie's shock of red-blonde hair.

She catches sight of Rafe first, dark skin and dark hair, the man's narrow waist flaring into those strong shoulders. Not as wide as Castle, not as solidly built, but she can see why Allie thinks they're so alike. Rafe is on his feet adjusting the umbrella and looking intently at Allie every few seconds or so, as if concerned, while she smears on sunscreen. That's what it is, what Allie sees in Rafe, and in her father - that sense of being aware of her, knowing, able to meet her needs before she knows she has them.

Mm, Castle is very good at that. Like he tried to do in the bathroom. He predicts her needs, like there's a bit of magic in it. Of course, he can be woefully dense, he *is* a man, but he has a surprising capacity for relentlessly understanding her. Sometimes good, sometimes bad.

Kate hopes she's managed to do the same for him. She's not always certain she's getting it right, but she'd like to think that after five years, she sees him, knows him, knows how to soothe, how to inflame, how to carry him when he needs to be carried, how to let him carry her when he needs that too. Lately, they've entered into this balance where he's up and positive when she's down, and then when she's solid again, he's the one crashing.

Dash catches sight of Allie as well, starts urgently pulling his mother forward. She feels Castle's laugh at her back, a confirmation that he sees them too, so she lets Dash have at it, releasing his hand to let him race ahead, Kate only a few steps behind him.

Rafe turns just in time to catch the little guy, grabbing him before he can spray sand all over the carefully arranged beach blanket. Allie's on her towel, but she gets up, shading her eyes with a hand as she looks for her father just past Kate's shoulder. She slides her sunglasses back down on her face, redoes the ponytail. Hm, looks finger-mussed. Male finger-mussed. Kate's glad they've had some time alone.

"Mommy, I found them," Dashiell crows, wriggling in Rafe's easy grip. "I found them. Here they are!"

"Here they are," she echoes, and smiles at Allie, takes Dash away from Rafe. "Settle down a little, kiddo. You're flinging sand around."

"You got a good spot," Castle says from behind her, coming over the sand with Ellery in his arms. The girl leans out for Kate, so she takes her, hugs her a moment before setting her down on the blanket. Ella starts digging her feet into the sand, even through the blanket, making little hills and divots with her heels and toes. She reaches out to grab an adult's hand - it happens to be Rafe's - and then she starts jumping from blanket to towel and back to blanket, around and around Rafe.

Kate shakes her head, trying to indicate to the man that he doesn't have to play human tetherball pole with Ella, but he just shrugs at her. Dashiell is pulling beach toys out of the bag that Castle has dumped in the sand under the umbrella, and Alexis is trying to interest him in building sand creatures with her. Kate sees a smear of sunblock on Dashiell's ear and is pleased; sometimes she thinks her husband is rolling his eyes at her when she tells him to sunscreen the kids' ears.

Castle has his hands on his hips, watching Dash and Allie, and Kate is standing at the edge of the blanket, her eyes on him now, and she realizes that her kids are under control, and being looked after, and she and Castle are-

Well, she was thinking superfluous, but now she's thinking-

free.

She reaches out to pull a hand off his hip and laces her fingers through his, her body warm and flushed under the sun, growing ever hotter when he turns his eyes on her. They both are wearing sunglasses, but they might as well not be. After five years, she knows exactly how he's looking at her.

"Wanna swim with me?" she says, widening her eyes as oh-so-innocently as she can behind her frames. "Go get wet."

He must know, or see through her, because he gives her that wolfish grin and squeezes her hand. "I always wanna get you wet."

"Dad," Allie groans, on her knees beside Dashiell, reaching out to slap his calf. "Seriously."

"Hey now, I don't complain when you two do it," he says, raising his and Kate's joined hands to gesture between Allie and Rafe. Kate wonders if he knows how that sounded, and right when she meets Allie's eyes with a smirk, Castle groans and shakes his head. "No, no. Okay. Not what I was-" He wipes a hand over his eyes, peers between his fingers at his oldest.

Kate steps in closer, bumping her hip into his to shut him up. "Allie, you and Rafe mind watching them while we swim?"

"We got it. And we'll forget you said that, Dad." Allie gives her boyfriend a wide, innocent look that Kate realizes looks far too much like the look she just gave Castle. Oh, not good. She needs to distract Castle right now.

"Let's go, Rick," she says, pushing on his hip to get him moving. "Before they change their minds. Or one of the little ones pitches a fit."

Castle follows after her, and she's glad the air of injured father leaves him so quickly. It means he's thinking about her, and not about his daughter. It means he's thinking about getting wet.

Getting her wet. She grins and bites her lip, catches up to him so she can see his face.

"Hey there, baby," she murmurs.

"You say that and you have no idea what it does to me," he growls in her ear, herding her towards the water.

She lets herself be corralled, tries to avoid his hands (not in front of all these people all these little kids), reaches the water before he does, shivering as a curl of water laps at her feet.

"All in, Kate," he calls out with a laugh, wading in, passing her as he goes deeper.

"It's cold," she mutters. It's not that cold, but it isn't a warm bath. Goose bumps race across her shoulders, down her legs; the stir of water around her feet like a wet, cold kiss.

Castle stops in waist-deep water, waiting on her, but when he sees she's not moving, he heads back for her, picks her up by the waist and carries her forward until he's dragging her against the water. Kate yelps, drawing away from the cold slap of a wave, but Castle's already got her in up to her belly button, still pulling her in.

"No, no, wait," she gasps. Half-hearted struggling, because she knows he's right - just have to go for it and warm up with some swimming - but she clamps her hands around his on her waist, his skin as cold as hers but already heating her up.

"Ready? Because I'm about to toss you in."

"No!"

"One."

"Don't you dare - not again-"

"Two."

"Castle!"

"Three-"

And before he even finishes three, which she was preparing herself for, bracing herself for, Castle is already jumping towards the massive wave headed their way, dragging her into the crest with him, pulling her down so that they both sink underwater, churned by the force of the wave.

He pushes her back up, swimming up himself, her head breaking before his does, bobbing in another swell as she treads water. Castle comes up in front of her, wiping his eyes, then grins. Her feet can't touch, but it looks like his can.

She slaps his shoulder, shivering, but already getting used to it.

"You did say you wanted someone to dive into it together-"

She laughs, feels the heat rushing through her because he remembers, even after all this time. He knows her. Has paid attention to her. He always does. Kate grabs his arm, pulling herself to him through the water, wrapping an arm around his neck, grinning at him.

"Can you touch the bottom?"

He nods, that smile sliding across his face. He's pleased with himself. "Uh-huh."

"I can't touch."

"I know," he grins.

"What happens when I get tired?"

"That's what you've got me for," he says. His hands slide around her waist, her body drifting with the swell of the waves, but he keeps her anchored to him. "Feel free to wrap your legs around my waist."

She narrows her eyes at him. He's asking for it.

"I think I have a cramp," she pouts. Kate pulls herself even closer, lifts her knees, slides her legs around him, squeezing tight. He gasps, shivers, totally melodramatic, and she grins even wider. She kinda loves that. The way he overreacts, as if amusing her is half the fun. Or just amusing himself. Goofy, amazing man.

She presses her chest against his, feeling a lot like a starfish clinging to an oyster, trying break inside. Hmm, octopus, sea stars, long limbs. Kate grins to herself and nibbles on his jaw, blowing against his wet cheek. He shivers this time for real, his palms spread against her back, encompassing skin and pushing her hair out of his way.

"Hey baby," she murmurs and rocks against him.

Castle grunts and buries his mouth against her neck, biting.

She lifts a hand and scrapes her hair off her face, giving her the chance to tilt her head back, blink at the wide blue sky overhead. The buoyancy of water. The sounds of kids laughing. Castle's tongue at her jaw. His body between her legs. She drops her hand back to his shoulder, curls over him to get at his ear again. Something about the soft skin there, the hard line of his jaw against hers, the little moans he makes when she traces the shell of his ear with her tongue.

"Kids are probably watching," he mutters, and suddenly they are lower in the water. He must have bent his knees, she's got ocean up to her chin; it hides them, just a little.

"No one's watching. We're pretty far out," she murmurs back, glancing past him to the wide horizon.

"You're not helping my self-control, Beckett," he growls and she jerks against him, heat cramping tightly in her gut, flaring along her legs.

"Don't call me that," she half-laughs. "You know I can't-"

"I know, oh I know," he says, his mouth at her collarbone, through the water itself, the hot burn of his tongue competing with the sting of water. How can he possibly breathe like-

oh.

Oh, she doesn't care.

"More," she moans, tries to get a hand between them without dislodging the way she's pressed-

"Kate," he gasps, grabs for her hand, squeezing. "None of that."

She grunts and slides her fingers through his hair instead, clutching, pulling his mouth to hers, trying to level out the burn, keep them on the ground. Or well, in the water. Or. . .her brain doesn't do metaphor when he's licking her throat like that-

And that. "Jeez, your mouth is magic," she mutters.

He pulls back, laughing, dissolving the intensity of the moment but giving them both the chance to keep from racking up charges of indecent exposure. "Magic, huh?"

She might be blushing; she didn't exactly have control of her mouth when she said that. But. It's. . .true. "You did always seem so disappointed when I didn't believe in all that stuff. Well. Now I do. It's you." She grins widely at him, hears magic man in her head. Her mother played that song. Try to understand, he's got magic hands. Oh my, yes.

Castle brushes a thumb across her cheek, skimming under her eye - her mascara must be running, even though it's supposed to be waterproof-

"I love the way you look at me," he murmurs, and his thumb scrapes at the mole on her cheek. She watches the absorption in his face, the way his eyes travel over her skin, reading everything in her eyes, as if looking for the clue, the key to her mystery.

"I love looking at you," she says back, cupping his face in her hands, propping her elbows on his chest to keep herself upright in the roll of waves over them. Water comes up to her mouth; he holds her up, still half-spellbound by her. Kate leans in and touches her lips to his, gentle, watches how very blue his eyes are as they swim in love for her.

Too much. He's too much, and it somehow both breaks her heart and fills her heart to the brim, overflowing. She bites her lip, watching him, and then lightly slaps at his cheeks, trying to shake off the solemnity of the moment.

"No more make-out sessions in full view of the kiddos, okay?" She huffs at him. "I can't keep my hands off you."

He smiles at that, still tender and adoring though, shakes his head at her. "You're adorable. You know that? It's adorable when you do that."

She rolls her eyes, but that thrills her too. Because he's said it before, in other situations, when they've been in different circumstances. When they were still finding their way. It's one of the truest things about them, the words they've said to each other over the years - words they couldn't help saying, words that slipped out, words that meant more than the surface things they said.

She searches his eyes for the right words now, for a way to say exactly what she means and also, to reference the long history of push and pull between them. Those are the words that matter the most to him, to her, that show him he wasn't the only one paying attention.

Kate drops her legs from his waist, leans in closer to him, her cheek against his. She can't think of anything, can only feel how he is everything, just everything, and she'd never recover if he-

She lets her mouth hover over his, her hand at his cheek, noses brushing. The water lifts them both, pushes her lips up to glance off his. She brushes soft, light kisses against his mouth, their breath mingling.

"I love you. I love you and you make all of this extraordinary."