Fighting a Losing Battle

" Rom.What does it mean when someone says you're an unopened bud?" she innocently asked with her buried in the crook of his neck. Her breath brushed his skin. It felt unbearable. He had forgotten how it felt to be next to her. Torment and happiness swirled within him. It felt uplifting, deliciously painful.

Rom hummed and opened his eyes. Despite the dim light in the room, he could see her features, shaded by the moonlight. She looked beautiful, like a muse that bards and minstrels spoke about in their tunes and ballads.

He cleared his throat " It means that a man hasn't touched you." he explained, fiddling with the strands of her hair. He wondered where that came from. The old folk used those words to describe maidens.

Edýia frowned " But, you touched me." she remarked, raising her head to look at him. Curiosity sparkled in her eyes. She wanted answers.

Rom chuckled " I have, but it is a little different." he replied, with a slight smile, caressing her cheek with the back of his fingers.

Edýia fell silent and looked at him wide-eyed, waiting for him to continue " When a man and a woman love each other", he cleared his throat "they lay in bed and become one." he vaguely explained, looking at Edýia, who frowned.

" You mean they bed each other? They do the nasty thing. " Edýia innocently said and lowered her gaze, ashamed. He could feel her cheek burn and her breath quickened a bit.

" So you know," he causally commented, smiling. Edýia nodded, her lips set in a thin line, and her gaze went downcast again.

" The woman you brought to the house not long ago tied up. She was kind enough to explain how it worked. Albeit brief, but I understand. " she said, looking up at him.

" Rom, do we have to wait until we are wedded?" she curiously asked, looking up at him.

Rom hummed " It would be best if we do. There would be trouble with your brothers if we don't stay true to the tradition." he said, looking at her with questioning eyes.

" They don't have to know. No one does but us." Edýia reasoned, with a tinge of anger in her voice.

" Secrets don't stay hidden. They will come out eventually ". Rom warned, a little worried, cupping her cheek.

" I want to, Rom", she decisively said, pushing herself off the bed.

"It's not simple, Edýia. I would rather wait until we are wedded and-"

" For once, I would like to decide for myself, and this is what I want. I don't want to be the sad little lamb that gets pushed from one corner to another." she continued in the same tone, hugging her knees. She was hurt, always locked up, unable to experience the little things that made life worth living. Her brothers took the choice away from her. She knew there were no malevolent intentions on her brother's part, but still, she felt deprived.

Rom pushed himself up " You don't know what you are asking for, Edýia. There will be no turning back if we do this." he said, turning her to look at him.

Above all else, Edýia craved to live all that shed been denied so far by Haren and Dakran. He understood that there was a good reason for it, but it didn't change anything. She wanted to live. That little fact remained.

" You think it's a mistake. It would be nice to get a chance to learn something. " she pouted and closed her eyes. Her shoulders slumped, and she hid her head in her knees.

Rom sighed " It will be painful. I don't want you to regret this. I want it to be a good memory, at best." he sullenly said, worried that things would turn for the worst if something went wrong.

" Worse than when Haren punched me in the nose?' I doubt that," she pointed at her nose " Can't hurt worse than this, can it?" she questioned, her eyebrows raised

Rom nodded " Afraid so," he tried to scare her, but Edýia caught the lie.

" You're lying," she huffed in annoyance.

Rom closed his eyes. She wasn't relenting " Maybe.I don't know, Edýia," he admitted, with his eyes closed and felt his throat tighten.

" You don't know. I don't understand?"

Rom opened his eyes, " I have never been with a woman Edýia. You're my first," he shyly admitted and turned to sit on the edge of the bed.

Edýia shuffled out of bed and sat in front of him with a wide grin " I guess we're both unopened buds, then." she amusedly said.

Rom snorted " Yes, something like that," he took a sharp breath, his head lowered and looked at his feet.

Edýia took a step closer to him, close enough for his head that hung low to brush against her stomach, running her fingers through his red hair, gently caressing it.

Room rested his hands on her waist and rubbed his cheek against her stomach, much like a cat. She pulled him off the bed to stand before her and looked at him, starry-eyed, smiling faintly.

Both looked at each other in silence and studied each other's features as if they saw something new that they hadn't seen before. Edýia brushed his lips with her fingertips, letting her hand rest on his cheek. Rom closed his eyes, revelling in the warmth. She tip-toed and pecked his lips. Rom opened his eyes the moment she pulled away, brought his hand to her neck and rested there for a bit, sliding it down to her shoulder, clasping her hand

" You are so beautiful, Edýia," he whispered and kissed her forehead.

Edýia softly hummed, closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. She squeezed his hand and fisted his tunic with the other.

Rom was the first man that she had ever had a chance to be close to, he was patient and understanding, and he cared about her. He was a handsome man. She was sure that many women would have thrown themselves at him.

His fiery red hair and his blue eyes were a lethal combination that would make any woman's head spin, he rarely smiled, but it was a sight that was worth waiting for. She thought.

Edýia opened her eyes. Her brows knotted together. She looked at him with pleading eyes. She pushed herself up on her toes and pecked his lips. Her grip on his tunic tightened even more. Her warm, soft lips lingered for a moment, and she let go of his tunic and pulled away from the kiss.