Chapter 2 - Compulsion

Drayce always looks at me with love in his eyes.

Right now, however, he could not even look my way.

I wanted to reach up to him and tell him I don't want to live without him but how can I make him stay when he has already set on leaving?

He is not as indecisive as I am. When he makes a decision, he goes for it. It would take a mountain before he would change his mind, especially when he knows he is right.

His broad shoulders shrink as he sat by the far side of the bed, his back facing my way.

I can tell that this is indeed the end...

There is no way around it. We have broken up plenty of times before but we always made up a few minutes after. This time, there is something certain within the air.

I used to be good at finding ways or excuses to be able to be with him as he used to when I bring up the break-up topic but the heavy conclusion must be faced.

With an aching heart, I look down at my stomach and embrace myself as tightly as I could before uttering my final words. "Alright..."

3 years ago

I always thought I was invisible. Too average to be noticed by anyone at all. Sure, I was given a few interests by guys during high school and college but never the same way when I joined tinder.

It's been a few days and I must say, swiping left and right and talking to them distracts me a whole lot better than I anticipated.

The attention I get diverts my attention that most times, I don't even have time to remember Jarvis at all.

It's Friday night and being an employee of a hotel and resort, weekends are our busiest days of the week. My housemate Olivia finishes up her dishes when I come across a profile on Tinder.

I initially wanted to swipe left, but for some reason, my thumb wouldn't move. Whenever I do, however, I feel a massive feeling that if I swipe left, I would regret it for the rest of my life.

I took a moment to stop and look at his picture. He smiles a half on the picture that only shows his neck up. His smile doesn't meet his eyes but when I got into his light eyes, something draws me into it. Compelling me to stare at him.

"Hey Sal, I'm going to head in," Olivia said cutting me off from my reverie. "It's going to be a busy day for us tomorrow. You better sleep yourself."

I look over my shoulders and nodded. "Yeah, I'll head in soon."

Olivia smiles before going inside their room.

Looking back on my phone, his photo looked a lot more appealing to me now than it did when I was half paying attention.

Slowly, after considering it, my fingers swiped right. In just a second, words pop up on my phone saying 'It's a match!' With our pictures placed right next to each other.

Boy, do I hope not to regret this, I said to myself inside my head. I stood up and set my alarm for the next day before locking it and heading inside the bedroom.

Weeks flew by fast when you were either enjoying yourself or too busy doing a lot of things within the day.

I have been talking to quite a few men from the app but after that lame date I had with the engineer, I feel a bit discouraged.

I mean, I'm sort of attracted to him but after ordering hot cocoa instead of a latte, I think he thinks I'm lying. After all, I did say I consume crazy amounts of caffeine. I guess I should have told him I'm nervous about the date and that I couldn't stomach caffeine at all.

My thoughts suddenly went astray to my blasting phone.

I should have taken it easy with answering men from the app. Granted, some of them are creeps but I didn't want to be rude.

After responding to some of them, I head to my room and sleep for tomorrow is an early day again.

When my alarm went off, darkness enveloped me.

We do not have any power.

I immediately closed my eyes and try not to think of anything that could further scare me. I wanted to get up but the fear of the unknown within the darkness paralyzed me.

My phone suddenly went off again, but this time, due to a message. When I open it up, it was from someone from tinder.

Good morning. How are you doing?

I pulled up my blanket and began to respond to him.

Salina: I'm scared. The power is out and I'm supposed to go to work. I don't know what to do. Considering not going to work.

D: Oh yeah, here too. I heard it's from a power plant that got hit by lightning last night. Don't worry I'm sure they are trying to fix it.

Salina: Even still. Until the power's back, I won't be moving.

D: It's alright. I know it might be scary moving around without your sense of sight but try to move. When your eyes adjusted to the darkness, you can see and be able to move around a bit.

Salina: But I don't want to see. What if there are ghosts in here? I don't want to see them.

D: I understand. Why don't you put on your light from your phone and start moving around? I'll talk to you as long as you want me to if you want.

Salina: Okay, please stay. I'm getting ready now.

When I talk to men from this app, I normally don't remember their names. I don't want to, probably because they are just supposed to be distractions and nothing more. If I remember their names, it means I'd be expecting something more.

I can't. I like how I am right now.

I like the independence, I like how carefree I could live and how adult I feel right now.

This guy though, I didn't want to remember him by name, but I appreciate the modesty and respect he has for me. I think he's the only one apart from this other guy that talks to me like I'm just a person, and not a piece of meat or a prize to win over.

When I got ready, I went out through the darkness and knocked on Kuya Mike's part of the duplex as we are the only ones working today from the interns.

"Hey, I'll be out in a minute." He whispers as he opens the door.

While waiting, I read D's messages.

D: That's great. Don't worry, the power usually gets back on not too long after it went out. If I was there, I'd be happy to give you a hand to move around with the help of flashlights and candles of course.

"Salina, you ready?" Mike said as he stood ready for our work for today.

"Yeah." I smiled.

As we head over there, I quickly texted him back.

Salina: Hey, thank you so much. I was really scared of the dark and I managed to move around despite it. I appreciate it.

With that, I mute my phone and head to work with a smile as the lights began to turn on and the power returns.