Chapter 35

GABRIELA

"But you're really nothing? You seemed too close to just be friends." Carlota asked for the millionth time "Yes Carlota, we're just friends. There is nothing more between us." I assured, but I'm completely sure she wouldn't believe it, "I don't believe that." 

"Then why do you ask me every two seconds if you're going to think what you want?" I asked exasperated "It might be because I know you're hiding something from me. You know with time will come when I find out, I prefer you tell me, I don't think you want me to make you dizzy with my constant questions." 

That was true, I could bear everything except for Carlota to get annoying because she didn't stop asking questions, especially if it was about something she didn't want to talk to anyone about. Because as I would tell her Alex and I kissed, hey Carlota, do you know before you guys interrupted us, we kissed? I don't think I forgave him for everything yet and I wasn't going to risk her going back on everything he said about trying to get along with Alex. But I also knew where to attack. 

At the party I had noticed she didn't take her eyes off Diego, and I know she was attracted to him, but I also know she doesn't want me to talk about this in front of Marcos, I don't understand why, but they never want us to talk about it, neither. "I know how to stop you, so I wouldn't go down that path." 

"Of course, I'm going to continue down that path, you were holding hands, and my not-so-infiltrator told me you've been talking for a couple of weeks, but before you couldn't see him." He insisted, looking in the direction of Marcos "Do you really want to continue that way? Marcos, do you want me to tell you something?" I asked, shifting my gaze to our best friend, who was looking at us in the rearview mirror every couple of seconds. 

"Sure, what is it? Does it have to do with Alex?" he asked and I denied "No, it's about Carlota." I assured and his smile became a little smaller, which seemed strange to me, but I decided to ask about it later "What do you have to tell him about me?" Carlota asked with a frown. "If I tell you a simple word you will understand." 

"Try it." She challenged, crossing her arms, "Diego." I answered simply and I could see how at the moment her face changed enough for me to know I hadn't been wrong, which made me emerge victorious from this, or at least for the moment. I would tell her, everything if I had to, even the kiss, but I wanted her to stop bombarding me with questions, at least until after we had eaten dinner and made sure what she told Alex was really true, just in case. I would tell her everything she wants to know. 

"What about Diego?" she asked as if nothing had happened "I'd love to say it if you want, Marcos will surely be happy to hear it too." I said "What's the matter with you two? I don't want you to argue again." 

"We're not going to argue, but it's information the three of us should handle, don't you think, Carlota?" I asked with a big smile on my face "You can tell him if you want, I don't care." she answered, and I could see how Marcos's eyes widen, not expecting that answer "Yes, it matters to you, I can tell." 

"But I'm more interested in what's going on with Alex." She assured "Then tell me if you don't mind..." Marcos began, but I denied "I'm not going to do it." Marcos's face was one of not understanding anything, and it was normal, because seen from the outside it could be whatever we were talking about, and it was Marcos. When we talked about these things, he never found out much, let's say. 

"Okay, we'll make a deal." Carlota said, and I could see she was grateful I didn't said anything. I would have to figure out why these two didn't want anything to do with each other's relationships. "What kind of deal? You don't have a trap somewhere, do you?" she asked and I denied, because I wasn't going to trick my best friend "No, I won't be cheating, really, you can trust me." 

"Then what kind of deal?" Carlota questioned "We talk after dinner, but if you talk too." I said, "So there has to be a condition on that." It started and I nodded, because I had an idea it was "Don't let Marcos be there, right?" 

"Exactly." She affirmed and I laughed, "But wouldn't you mind if he found out?" I asked laughing "It was to see if you would tell me, but with this deal we can talk calmly and it's the psychology of a guy intervenes." 

"And can you explain to me why I can't be there? I also want to know what is happening to Gabriela and what is going on between them." Marcos protested from the seat in front "Don't worry about that, I'm sure you'll talk about it, so don't worry." 

"You know Gabriela doesn't tell everything, she keeps details to herself and I want to know everything." Marcos protested again and we both rolled our eyes "Don't worry, you know I'm good at detecting lies in cases like Gabriela's." 

"But Gabriela isn't the same as the rest." Marcos assured and I laughed "Don't worry, I'll find out and then we'll talk and I'll tell you the details she didn't tell you. Seem to you?" Carlota asked and Marcos nodded "I think, and it had better be true, Carlota." 

"It will be." At that moment, Marcos parks the car near my grandparents' house, we get out of it and head towards the house. 

When we got to the door my grandmother appears, whom both Marcos and Carlota greet with a hug and enter to greet the rest, and I was going to do the same but my grandmother prevents me from entering. I could tell she wanted to know what had happened between me and Alex, and I would tell her. Also, I'm sure she would give me some of those tips that could help me with Alex and everything I'm feeling. 

"Do you want to go for a walk or are we going to have dinner now?" I asked "Dinner will be ready in a while so we can go for a walk without problems." She assured and I laughed "Well let's go." We didn't talk for a couple of minutes, Me, to make sure no one at my grandparents' house heard anything we were going to talk about and my grandmother I think more than anything because I didn't speak. But I didn't even know where to start telling her, so I think it would be better if she asked me questions and that way we would finish sooner. 

"Grandma, if you want to know something, I think you better ask because I have no idea what to tell you." I sincerely said "Did you tell him how you feel about him?" she asked and I took a breath. "Something like that." I replied "Something like what?" she insisted "I didn't tell him, but is nothing like you're thinking" 

"And if you tell me what happened? That way maybe I find out better about what happened." She said "Well, we were walking along the beach and talking about many things, but apparently after we left the party there was a misunderstanding." 

"Misunderstanding?" she asked confused "Alex thought I was interested in another person, for good reason because at that moment I didn't explain myself at all, in my mind it was clear, and then he told me something like he hoped I would be happy with that person and I told him I almost am." I got to see the pain on his face at that moment, but I couldn't help but smile. At that moment I realized he believed something that was not true. 

"And what did you say?" he inquired "That he was the person I was interested in, the one who made me happy." I answered "And what happened after that?" she asked and I took another breath. "He kissed me." 

"You kissed and you weren't going to tell me?" she demanded and I rolled my eyes "I already told you I didn't know where to start Grandma, all this stuff with Alex and my feelings has my head about to explode." I assured "But you are clear about what you feel for him, what is it makes your head about to explode? Are you going to tell me you don't know he loves you with all his soul? 

"I know grandma, and that's the problem." I protested "What do you want to be with him? That has a solution, or is it you're already together? she asked raising an eyebrow "We're not together grandma, but he also told me a long time ago he loved me and hurt me, I don't want to go through that again." 

"You're afraid he'll hurt you again, aren't you?" she asked and I nodded, because why lie to Grandma? She would know anyway "Of course, I suffered like I never suffered in my life, grandma. I loved him too much and he hurt me." 

"But you still love him..." she stated and I nodded again "Of course, more than before." I stated "And is it fear that holds you back?" asked "Yeah." I affirmed, "But you didn't really notice how much you suffered for him." 

"Because they were already mad enough at him at home to give them more reason to hate him." I assured, and it's at this moment that I realize I was protecting him from the beginning, "You protected him." 

"I know, but I just wanted nothing to happen to him." I said again "You still loved him despite everything." Grandma stated "Exactly, I still loved him and after a couple of years I managed to get him out of my head until this year, that's clear." 

"That's why you never went with another boy, you still loved him, even though your head refused to believe it, that's what's happening to you now." She exposed and I expelled all the air inside my lungs "But I know he loves me; I don't think that's the problem." 

"You know it, but you don't want to assimilate it, Gabriela. You must understand this guy is doing everything in his power to get you back and make you understand he's extremely sorry for what he has done to you, you must believe him, especially in what he's sorry for." She assured "I know he's sorry, really." 

"So, what's going on?" she asked and I shrugged "I don't know Grandma, I really don't know." I said, suddenly tired, "Well, the only thing I can tell you is you take your time to understand everything he does, so you get into that thick head of yours. Your heart already knows what Alex feels for you, now your head needs to know and you will only be able to do if you open your mind to Alex, it's the only way." 

"It's not easy, you know?" I assured and she nodded "I know you don't like to show what you feel, but you should let it out from time to time, at least with people you trust." She explained "It can be, but it's not easy. I spent years trying to keep you all from finding out what was wrong." 

"Since Alex left you, I guess." He opined and I denied, because it hadn't been since Alex left me, but before I even met Alex "No, before that." I confessed "When?" she asked surprised "After seeing how you got when I told you they were messing with me." 

"So long? Have you been like this for eighteen years?" she asked and I shrugged, because I really have no idea how long it was "I don't keep count, but more or less yes." I affirmed "That's too long and now I understand it costs you so much, it's normal." 

"That's what I meant." I said "Well, let's do something." She suddenly blurted out "What?" I asked confused "You will start to show what you feel, regardless of what others feel." She said and I denied, because I didn't want to do it "That's impossible and I'm not going to do it, Grandma, I don't like the way you put yourself and I'm not going to allow that to happen, you're not going to have a bad time because of me." 

"But you are young Gabriela, you shouldn't think about what will happen to the rest of us, you must live your life." she assured and I agreed, because I already knew and was doing it "And I am doing it, don't worry about it. I'm fine and nothing will happen to me, really." 

"Keeping bad things to oneself is not good, Gabriela, it can hurt you." He replied in a worried tone, "If he hasn't done it in so long, don't worry, he won't. I know how to handle what I feel." I assured her, but she still denied "I don't doubt it, but in the long run it can affect you." 

"It's not easy to change that grandma, you must understand me." I tried "I understand you, but do me a favor then." She asked "Which one?" I asked "The day you need to vent with someone, don't hesitate to call me or come home, I will listen to you delighted." 

"I'll do it if you'll be calmer that way, really." I assured her, "Now let's go home before your siblings come for us." She said laughing "Let's go, but can you answer a question for me?" 

"Sure, what's up?" she asked "Did you tell Marcos or Carlota I was going to meet Alex?" I inquired and she quickly denied "No, but how did they find you? no one knew where you were except you and Alex." 

"Do you remember when Marcos in high school?" I asked and she nodded "Well, when he stayed for the week when I got stressed, nervous or sad I went to the beach and he knows that, I think that's why he found me." 

"Because you were nervous." she practically confirmed it, but I denied it, because I wasn't, in the end I was going to meet the boy who was clear loved me and I had known for a long time "Not nervous, but I had thousands of things on my mind. On one hand, Alex, on the other the discussion with Carlota, that's why I went to the beach." 

"Did you argue with Carlota?" she asked surprised "Yes, but don't worry, everything is already solved. By the way, Grandma, can we sleep over today?" I asked and she nodded with a big smile on her face "Of course my little girl, you all will always be welcome in our house, and I imagine you will have to talk to them about many things." 

"Carlota wants to know everything." I affirmed and she laughed "She always wanted to know everything, especially in the field of boys." She opined "I know, and that's why we're going to have to talk. I don't know how long it will last." 

"Are you going out?" she asked and I shrugged, because I have no idea "It's most likely, why?" I asked with a raised eyebrow and that's when she handed me the key to the house and I stared at her like a fool. 

"In case you come late." She simply said "Thank you Grandma." And with that, we went home talking about things that weren't Alex and it helped me forget for a moment the interrogation Carlota would be preparing with the help of Marcos, surely to do to me after dinner and I decided it was better the two of them were there, we would go as soon as we were going to talk about me and Alex, on that topic, well, in general when it came to boys they were always quite gossipy, especially Marcos, but they were my best friends and it was a strange I didn't tell him something.