I opened my eyes and waited for my vision to adjust. I was tied to a chair again? When did I...doesn't matter. What happened leading up to me getting here? Why did everything have come back to me now?
Ah, I was in the parking lot with my father, and I heard someone scream behind me! Then I lost consciousness fully.
Fuck! Did I get hit? I looked around me at the dark parking garage ignoring my headache and couldn't help but gasp at the lump to my left. He didn't!
"T-Tyler?" I saw Tyler lying on the ground in front of me. He was breathing but roughed up a bit. Who dared to give my Tyler a black eye?!
Fuck! I let my emotions take over again and I left Tyler alone after I beat up Sally's father. I left him alone and vulnerable and it wasn't the first time. He got attacked again because of my failure! Maybe I was horrible just like my dad after all.
No! Now wasn't the time for self pity!
I wiggled in the chair I was tied to, trying my best to get loose but couldn't. Standing up, kind of, I decided to hop over to him.
"You're awake?" I heard someone say behind me. A foot kicked the chair I was tied to over and sent me tumbling hard to the ground. "I can't believe you came for me as soon as you got your memory back. Didn't you know that would be the wrong move? You should still act logically in this situation. Is this what happens if you keep feeling emotions? You lose control of yourself? Why are you still acting like a child?"
"What right do you have to lecture me? Like you're so fucking great?! Why did you do that to Kanstantinos and I?" I snapped back. "What is it that you fucking want?"
"That right there." My father smiled a bit at my confusion. "Everyone has a different capacity for feeling emotion. Something sad for you will mean nothing to someone else. Some may hold onto anger until they're dead and some may just let it go. But I was born unable to feel anything.
"I can only emulate what I've seen. So I wanted to see more of it because it's fascinating. I want to see what new emotions might come amidst complicated and extreme situations. If it was brutally cruel enough, wouldn't I be able to find a new emotion that nobody's expressed before? And if so, can it be controlled?
"I want to see the expressions they'll make. The action they'll take, and the person they'll become when driven to the edge. And as they've reached the very edge, can they be pulled back? That's what I wanted from you two and you both delivered it as planned."
I stared at my father in shock. "You did all this just to satisfy some sick curiosity for some social experiment?" I immediately flashed back to my assault on Liam and Chris and everyone else I hurt in the name of protecting Tyler! This new feeling made me want to throw up. I was manipulated into hurting all those people, because of his sick game, but I still chose to hurt those people. Every move of my life was plotted by someone else! Innocent people died for this game and Jay and I are guilty! "There was no need. It didn't have to be us.....or there are more ethical ways."
"Ethics have nothing to do with science."
"It still didn't have to happen to us!"
"Strange, this was the only reason you two were even born. If it's not this, what's the point of you two even being alive?" Dad asked. "Set them loose Giovanni. I'm tired."
"Wait!" I couldn't let him leave now! He just spoke his piece now I had to speak mine! "Let me-"
"We'll meet when the plans say we can meet. I encourage you to remember who's in charge here. So just play your part like you always have." My father walked from the warehouse we sat in leaving us three in the room.
Fucking asshole.
Giovanni started to cut me from the chair. "Take Tyler and leave quickly. I didn't hit him hard enough to leave any damage."
"You hit him with a metal bat?" I snapping at him.
"No! I hit him with my fist to knock him out because the bat would kill him!" Giovanni snapped at me as he started to untie me. "Im not into killing minors, man."
"What?" Was this guy actually thinking of having a future of some kind?
"I actually feel sorry for you two being trapped in this game. But we have situations to deal with as well. Just get home safe kid and forget about doing anything to escape. If you just play the game you can win."
Was that seriously helpful in this moment."But why are you trying to help me?"
"Im not. The better you two play your part, the more money I get. The money, it's all business, kid. I didn't get into this to hurt children either, but the moneys too good," Giovanni finished cutting me out of the ropes and helped me stand up. "Win, then live your life kid. That's what I would do. Clean break."
"Live my life?" I asked. "How? After everything that I did to other people. And a clean start? That's too easy."
"Just get over it?!"
"How am I just supposed to get over my guilt?!"
"You'll find a way and time heals everything. It goes without saying, if you want to escape this game, you have two choices. Will you kill Tyler and save your brother? Or kill your brother to save Tyler?" Giovanni explained. As if I could choose between the two. "There's no other option and none of this ends until one of you die. Here's an incentive to think harder, you have a month to decide. If you can't, I'll just have to kill them both for you."
"You won't touch Tyler," I glared at him.
"Looks like you made your choice." I stayed silent for a little longer and watched Giovanni leave before turning to Tyler.
I picked him up in my arms and held him close to me. "I'm so sorry, Tyler." I cried into his chest. "All this time, you were only hurt because of me." I've never cried like this, not for anyone! I don't think I even cried for my mother! "I'm so sorry, I should've just done more and stayed far away from you!"
No this wasn't the time for self pity! It could've been so different. At least my Tyler wasn't dead as I had feared. He looked just as mangled as my mother had in that memory.
I started out of the warehouse, surprised to see, we were right next to the therapy clinic. All this happened in the hospital facility! He didn't even have to try hard to piss me off.
Kanstantinos or Tyler?
Two impossible choices to make logically. Jay, I mean, Kanstantinos was manipulated just like I was into this thing. All his moves were calculated by our father as well. He still tried multiple times to kill Tyler on his own accord. I even had a plan to kill him for it. Did he still deserved a chance to live normally just like me and Tyler would?
If I was told this? What does Jay know? Matter of fact, why did Giovanni even attend our school for all that time? What was his goal in all this, and why did he have such a hard on for my father.
"Yo," I heard someone call from the street. "Levi!" I looked seeing Stan running towards me. "Ah look at my boy, he's knocked out. But why are you two roughed up? Did you guys start steer fighting or something?"
"We got into it...with a few bullies," I lied. Stan shot me a look.
"Why's Tyler knocked out then? He would be super hyper after a fight like that."
"He was! He just fell asleep after we ate some heavy food, I didn't want to wake him up." I felt even worse just flat out lying to Tyler's dad, who had been nothing but a reliable father figure to me. "I'm sorry."
"Well....i don't believe you, but Tyler probably had you make it up for us not to worry, right?" Stan chuckled. "I get it, Drita and I did that all the time."
"Um, yeah," I tried to keep my best face on. But I just felt like my stomach was about to turn.
"Drita said there's something you two had to tell us together, my wife is nearly losing her mind trying to....are you ok?" Stan asked. "You look....a little sick? Do you need to go to the hospital or something? You're shaking Levi! Are you sick or just cold?"
"I'm both! I did some terrible things and I'm not sure how to deal with it all, because the damage I've caused isn't reversible! I can't just apologize and make it all go away! I fucked up!" I said tears now falling freely from my face. "I could never make it right from the start because thats not a choice that was even given to me! And to make it worse, it's all because of my father that I have to live with this guilt for the rest of my life! I'm a horrible person!"
"I'm sure it wasn't that bad." Stan tried to calm me down. "It's not like you killed somebody, you just got into a little fight. If anything, I'll help you out with my cop buddies-"
"I did that to Liam, because I got jealous of him and Tyler being so close. I did that because I couldn't control my anger!" I confessed. "I hurt him so badly and then treated him like crap."
"That was you? And what does your dad have to do with that?" Stan asked.
"I...." what did it have to do with my father? It's not like he could control my jealousy! It's not like he can control my love! I can't believe I let him get in my head with his psychology tricks! How could he control every aspect of my life from some unknown location? I'm so stupid! "He's just an asshole."
"Well, I'm not sure what's going on or why you did that, but just remember you can always come talk to me." Stan patted my head.
Should I let Stan know what Tyler and I just witnessed? "I'm not sure about that. Stan....can you take Tyler from here? I can't even think straight anymore. This is too much to even-"
"Calm down, you'll bust a vein in your head." Stan lifted Tyler from my arms. "In my sons eyes you're perfect for him, and believe me I pointed out flaws, but Tyler loves you regardless of anything you did. So, relax a bit before you give yourself a headache. He even loves you enough to wear that ring everywhere on his finger."
"You-"
"Drita hasn't noticed anything so don't worry, I'll keep it a secret. Sort yourself out with whatever's happening. I'll take Tyler home, so just think on what you need to do going forward to be the best husband you can be. I also used love to justify doing shitty things to the people around me and Drita. It's how you move forward and take accountability for it that really matters. When you're ready to tell us everything, you know where we are."
"Thank you, Stan." I said. But it's easier said than done.
"Hey, you're already like a son to me, this is what family does for each other. No matter what, we're on your side," Stan smiled still trying to make me feel better about myself. "It would be a shame to have to get used to someone new if you decide to just run from it."
"I'm not running from it. I'm just figuring it out, Stan," besides, you wouldn't support me if you knew everything I had done. And what I would probably have to do next, would make you guys think I'm the Devil.
How does one choose between their brother and the love of their life?
What was I supposed to do? No matter how hard I could try to escape, he would still have me in the palm of his hand. Doing what he wanted.
What could I possibly do for myself at this point with zero leads? I couldn't kill my father, because I couldn't find him or reach him.
So.....I have to kill Jay.