Lucky
#Chapter5 Lucky
luck.
I have never used that word for myself because I feel that I have never had luck before
Baekhyun and Yixing once called me lucky . the doctor called me lucky once too .
when I had a breakdown or something I don't really remember what happened I just remember waking up in the hospital with around 15 stitches on my forearm .
I think that was also the moment where Eunji decided to somehow change towards me .but for Seungsoo and my stepdad it just meant another reason to laugh at me .I'm just glad no one at school knows, that would be a double pain in the ass.
but maby I could call myself lucky that I still have 2 friends by my side well 3 with Eunji but I don't really trust her that much .she’s just there for me when my stepdad goes too far or when I would casually run into her alone . I know she cares though and know she’s not like her brother or father .
I could also call myself lucky that I have indeed food not much but enough knowing that there were people .. even kids out there probably starving right now in this moment.
also could I call myself lucky because I am healthy .I'm not suffering from some stupid disease that causes pain or makes me wonder every night before I fall asleep if I’ll wake up the next morning or not ...
I would say I'm healthy .. of Corse t-the the punishments are .. .. i-i'd rather not talk about it .. it still hurts to move and I’ve been feeling awful since that night .
I had passed out a couple of times while cleaning the kitchen too.
luckily Eunji had come to me early this morning .. yap I had to sleep outside as well just in front of the backdoor .no one should see me of Corse .well .Eunji had given me some bread secretly .and I enjoyed it .but what I was carving for was something to drink .I feel dry inside super dry .I was just scared to drink because he might see and give me another punishment.and my back probably still looked like a blue and purple painted page .
I couldn't bare it again... oh well .
it could be worse ?
/" fag /" a passing guy shot me a disgusted look as I walked along the school halls
yeah yeah thanks for the compliment you look good today too .
I cough into my hand as I opened my locker ... pretty much the only locker that’s been full of dirt .
words and shit but the worst they ever did was glue a pink dildo on it. I would have laughed too because they actually came earlier to school with a dildo just to glue it to my locker . you have to be really bored for that .
I had still 10 minutes left until class starts so I can as well try to somehow remove those words .
freakdoo,
kyunghoe,
faggot,
loser,
diner boy,
loner,
freak,
babyface,
Die alone,
bitch,
shall I continue ? most of those words repeat each other anyway written on my locker in different styles and colors .I stop cleaning when my head suddenly pouds really painfully I swallowed feeling my dry mouth, the edges of my vision turning dark for a slight moment ...gosh I'm thirsty I really would want water right now .
I cough once more .clearing my throat .oh shit I'm going to be sick now too or what !? that’s the last thing I need I'm already having problems because of my back I don't need to be sick .
I didn't even bother to continue cleaning my locker because I knew I was going to need my energies later for the diner .
And school marks aren't a problem for me because .. well I don't know I just don't think that it’s hard for me to understand ,gosh I really am a nerd .or wait doesn’t nerd mean being like all into comics and stuff ?
whatever I don't care... I exhaled harshly .
why do I feel so heavy all of the sudden ? my feet felt exhausted .I mean I felt awful this morning, but I feel like it’s just getting worse all at once .I just want to sit down and take a sip of water .
but I don't have water maby I could drink from the sink in the bathroom I stil have time .
but before I could go to the bathroom I cough once more this time it’s a fit and I couldn’t stop, my body shook, and my back was hurting so bad as I leaned forward desperedlt trying to Catch air . I think I might puke.
I need something to drink .
/" Finally dying ?/" a guy laughed along with some other but I couldn’t tell who it was since I quick turned away trying to stop coughing as I swallowed and cleared my throat all over. Not wanting anyone to see me like this .
/" Ey I'm talking to you !/"
stop yelling stop fucking yelling I'm not in the mood how am I supposed to get through the day if I get sick and if this is just the start then how am I supposed to survive the week last time I was sick it was worse than hell ! and I wasn't even fresh from a punishment back then .
/" I said I'm talking to you!-/"
/" but I'm not talking to you!!/"
fuck ,
oh no no no why did I say that what is wrong with me ? ,I quickly covered my mouth in shock .that happened a lot recently and I don't know why ! .
I hadn’t had more time to think of it or to run away because he grabbed my collar and slammed me against the locker .my eyes filling with tears at the agony this had caused me.
/" Since when does the freak open his mouth, oh my god /" he laughed .
But I only stared at him feeling kind of dizzy now as I excambed them all
.I noticed that I don't know their names at all . I only know xiumin, Chanyeol sehun and of Corse .. Jongin .because they were simply outstanding in my mind, but when I looked at them Chanyeol and Jongin weren’t with them. only xiumin and sehun.
that guy was still holding me tight squeezing my throat even and I really tried to breath so bad, but it wasn't easy when struggling was the most painful thing to do in my position.
.noticing how ... how dry my mouth and throat were .I really need water I haven’t drunk for a while now and I'm just starting to feel so so thirsty .I tried to move that thought back knowing that I have nothing to drink until the diner, but I can't I'm thirsty .so .. so ..
water please.. fuck ... something cold to drink or warm I don't even care .
/" Get to your knees you little bitch /" I .. I just get to my knees. somehow I had a tight grip onto his wrist of the hand he had on my neck . I got numb I feel weird .the pain wasn't even there really .. there there here here back back .w-what ?
.what's wrong with me ? I kind of looked at him seeing his lips move and the others laugh but I couldn’t really hear them as I suddenly found his movements interessting .
taking my mind off I felt so weird .focusing my eyes on his ugly jacket to see that there was a little hole that little hole had the form of a heart .I’ve seen hearts like those in the room of Eunji . beautiful .beautiful heart .red and pink .red and pink .
mostly pink
Eunji likes pink I guess .
who would call a color pink ? how did he come up with it ?
/" What the fuck !?/"
a voice made me blink slowly .and I felt my glasses slowly falling off .my glasses .
glass.. g-glasses .
I'm doing glasses right position .I am looking through to see .
why is Jongin looking at me ?
ouch .. my back hurts again
oh its suddenly so white .is that the ceiling ?
why are they all yelling in the background ? I just wanted to give the lady her bill for the coffee .
no forget that I'm really
tired I .. sleep want to sleep now .
glodnight mum see you in the morning .
----
I gasped as my eyes shot open
and dart around the room
/" Kyungie ./" I imediantly turn to that voice .
/" hey calm down its me Baekhyun beak .. /" He told me laying a hand onto mine .
and I swallowed feeling my dry mouth still . as if that boy could read my mind he
handed me a water bottle .which I gladly took .I didn't care who it belonged to me need water .
so quick I gulped as much as I could down my throat .panting in result .
/" Better ?/" he asked me and I cough once more screaming inside as my back hurt .. again
literally at every movement.
he pushed me gently back .and I winced slightly as I leaned againt the headboard .
what happened again ? I'm so confused .all I can remember is a heart and yelling .
/"what happened again ?/"
/" you're an idiot you know that ?/" he told me angry as he placed the bottle on the table besides the bed . this was actually the nurse’s office .thank god it wasn't the hospital that would have been more trouble .
/" Em ../" what was I supposed to say ? .
he punshed me on my shoulder
seeming upset and when I looked at him more closely he had red eyes not too obvious though ..
did he cry ?
/" Why do you gave me such an heart attack !?/" he questioned obviously upset and I know he had cried .I should feel guilty or sad myself because of it ... but I didn't I felt kind of happy that someone was being worried .
it was like at the hospital but I didn't know Baekhyun back then so there were just the guilty looks of Eunji and the concerened one of Yixing .am I this pathetic ?
/" Yah are you listening !?/"
I hug him as he said that feeling my eyes getting watery as I buried my face in his shoulder.
/" i-I'm sorry I didn't mean to/"
he hugged me back patting my back .
/" ah .. its ok.. d-don't cry I didn't mean to yell /" he chuckled nervously, and I did so too .
/" Thanks .. beak thanks for always being there /"
he chuckled once more and we partned from the hug .as he looked over me .and I adjusted my glasses .brushed over my hair on my eyebrows .disgusting .
/" I think you're still out of it/"
I looked at him with questions at that and he didn't lose his smile .
/" you were dihydrated and had a cold that mixed didn't really do well on you ./"
oh that’s why I felt so weird ..
/" The nurse said you should rest and stuff /"
/" Oh great ../" I roll my eyes sighing and he grabbed my hand again giving me that serious expression
/" I'm serious .do you know how I freaked out I was when you were laying there on the ground? I don't know what I would have done if Jongin didn't help me /"
my heart stopped
Jongin .. wait I did see him right ?
holy fucking shit what !????
I couldn’t help but stare at Baekhyun with wide eyes .
and he instandly grinned opening his mouth again .
/" ok long story short . I was walking along the halls with luhan when I turned around the comer and saw a few guys standing on your locker .I thought they were just drawing something on it as always and you said it wasn't a big deal so I just stopped at luahns locker and talked to him more .when Jongin also came around the comer with that Krystal girl who was trying way too hard to get him again /" I rolled my eyes because I do not like her at all .I don't like any of the cheerleaders .
yoona and Krystal being the worst . /" And Jongin called his friends so when they turned to him I saw you looking pale and staring into space .. you looked really scary to be honest so I couldn’t help but scream .
but most interessting for you ./"
he smiled sitting closer to me .
but I was thinking to myself .
didn't .. who was it again I don't know ? I remember someone pinning me against the locjers and I couldn’t breathe .
/" Jongin yelled as well and before I could even react he ran towards you yelling at them to stop .he looked angry though /"he giggled like a fan girl, and I turned red as a tomato imagining that
/" I also ran towards you and you suddenly fell back /" oh yeah I felt my back hit the ground and it hurt .
/" Jongin was pushing that guy back while I was at your side and when you fainted I pleaded to Jongin to help me get you to the nurse and he did .kyungie kyungiiiee /" he whisper screamed and my eyes got bigger what ? what ?
/" He carried you ..
brydal style ..
that’s it . I lay back again hiding my face in the pillow .omg he must think I'm fat ,now that he had to carry all my fat .
/" You looked so cute kyungie it was like in a movie .. soooo cute you hear me. your head was in the crouch of his neck and he rushed you to the nurse it looked like it was meant to be
the knight and the .. prince I guss /" he whined but with a smile
and my face heated up even more at his describtion .
/" You know what this means kyungie .. /"
I whine into the pillow as he said that
/" You defenetly need to meet him at the ball now /"
Chaper 6: Cconvinced?
a few more days pass and the ball are now in 2 days which meant that beak was getting really really annoying .and I'm starting to get nervous because I kind of want to go to the ball, but I'm just scared that people might find out that it’s me and then they will all laugh again and I really don't want that to happen
/" Kyungiiiee !/" beak entered the diner as always and I sigh knowing that he wants to convince me to go to the ball .
/" Hey beak ../" I gave him a weak smile and he sat down in front of the counter resting his head on his hands as he looked at me like a pleading puppy .
/" please don't talk about the ball again /"
/" Oh come on I know you want to go I don't get what your problem is /" I chuckle at his pouting face, coughing right after
my back was still hurting .but it’s gotten better . I wrapped an old bandage around my back over stomach and chest .it sounds weird because it was kind of squeezing the bruises, but it helped me feel as if I'm a little protected in case I fell or something it also made me not move to move .such as bending down and stuff so that helped too .
I moved my hand over my mouth clearing my throat .
yes I am a little sick too .big surprise .it’s just a cold though so nothing serious but coughing and feeling totally like shit .plus my voice is a little .. let’s say uglier than before .
/" And you're still sick/" he groaned and I chuckled once more going around the counter to clean some tables, today weren’t really many customers here so that was a good thing right .
/" But you at least drank some water this morning ?/"
/" Yes I did mummy /"
/"good /" he smiled and followed my movement with his eyes /"so about the ball .. /"
/" Beck I'm done talking about that stupid ball why on earth is it so important to you? you have a date already and friends there why do you want me to be there ?/"
Baekhyun sighed at that walking towards me and sitting down on the the table which I am currently cleaning /" just-/"
he couldn’t even finish talking because the door opened and Chanyeol walked in with yoona and Jongin .
/" shit /"
they were visiting this diner more times now because Chanyeol had attended that stupid danceclub or whatever which was close and .. Jongin was there too I think that was what beak tried to tell me when they first visited the diner .
yes it has been hard because I was always battling with myself when they are here .thinking that I should thank him for bringing me to the nurse the other day .but I'm just a fucking pussy which means I can't . besides that .I don't even think he recognizes me .or even sees me if it wasn't for yoona who kept making jokes about me.
at least I have kind of gotten used to them, so I as always just got over there and took their orders as always not meeting any of their eyes .especially Jongins .
I was about to walk away when that man on the other table left and I cleaned his table while I just happened to catch a few words of them talking .
Jongin said something about money and parents .also that he wanted a job making Chanyeol laugh at him .
but that was all I cached as I had to move back to the counter where beak still was .
and listened to his outfit ideas for the ball .
ball here ball there its everywhere .
and 2 days later it actually was time .its weekend .. again which meant the worst time of the entire week , don't even ask me how I get through the holidays oh boy, oh boy .
/" Kyungsoo! /" What now I was just doing the washing ..
/" I'm coming !/" yells and yells and yells .mostly from that bitchy Seungsoo I hate that guy .
he thinks he's now a princess or something just because he asked Jongin to meet him at the ball . I doped Jongin answered with honesty he was probably just trying to be nice .
/" here /" I lay his suit onto his bed. as I turned to him standing in front of the mirror doing .. whatever .I cleared my throat since my voice was still kind of gone .
/" need anything else ?/"
/" Yeah clean my make up from the ground I accidently let it fall/"
I stepped a few steps closer and saw the pouder all over the floor between his fancy mirror and make up table.
/" don't just stare how am I supposed to move when that shit is scattered in the floor .also get me new pouder ./"
my eyes traveld to him at that .
he was setting his eyebrows in the mirror not bothering what he just said but new pouder .where should I get new pouder ?? I don't have money for that. the little money I get I always hide for my future .yes I'm still saving for college even though its literally hopless .
/" Hey, I'm talking to you scumb /" he raised his voice looking at me in the mirror .seeing myself now as well behind him I once more realize how fucking ugly I am ..like geez what the hell is that? me ? . fuck .
/" Yeah sorry /" I couldn’t take looking at myself anymore so I rushed out of the room grabbing a dustpan and brush .returning in a hurry when I also heard my step dad call .
/"Kyungsoo !/"
I quick cleaned the floor as best as I could wincing a few times at the movements since my back .. well I don't have to repeat all the time that it hurt .
/" Kyungsoo !/"
/" I'm coming !/" I call back as I was done .coughing as always when I stood back up.
/" don't yell in my room scumb!/"
he scollded and I tried hard not to look at his stupid handsome face since it is making me so agressiv
/" sorry/" you are fucking arrogant bitch-
/" Kyungsoo!/"
no time to curse in thoughts .
I rush to the door and was about to close it when that asshole opened his smelly mouth again .
/" don't forget my pouder !/"
/" Yes ./"
with that I close the door and rush down the hall to the office of my stepdad .
I knocked and then opened the door .stepping inside .
/" Yes ?/"
he looked at me raising from his chair as he walked to one of his drawers .looking through some files I guess for his work .the diner wasn't the only thing bringing money but it’s not my place to ask or know where else it comes from .
/" so this evening is that school party or whatever. I'm going to be there too with Seungsoo /" obivasdly .how else would he get the apportunetly to talk to the teachers and make them somehow lift Seungsoos grades ?
/" well /" he grabbed a file walking back to his table and writing some things down ./" that means we'll probably be gone .but don't think it’s free time for you .you will be working at the diner. I’ll be back at midnight /"
he raised his eyes from the paper, and I felt as if he stared into my soul.
/" Should I find out that you went somewhere else other than the trashcans of the diner .you know what that would mean /" his voice was low and scary making me gulp and adjust my glasses .
/" Yes./" I bowed
/" that'll be it /"
as soon as I left the office I released a shaky breath ok clearing my throat this was honestly so annoying .
anyway .. what else for today .
I got Seungsoos suit .
cleaned the gaming room
the kitchen is done .
the living room as well
Eunji maby .
but first I need to get pouder and the washing is also waiting .
I walk towards the exit grabbing my keys as I left the house.
I counted my money on my way to the store . I think those few coins will be enough .it’s not the first time I'm buying his beauty shit .
entering I instandly knew where I had to go, and I didn't waste more time as I grabbed it and rushed to the cashregister starring at my coins the whole time as I layed the pouder down for the guy to scan it .
my heart skipped probably more than a thousand beats and I just kind of froze bringing my eyes up at that voice .that soft. warm voice .
I wasn't wrong as I stared into his amazing brown eyes, and he looked right back at me .I felt like a zombie staring at his killer .as I layed my coins down in front of him not moving my eyes .
he chuckled at me getting the money and his grin his half smirk was just too .. I think I'm dying .
/" Are you ok ?/" he spoke, and I started wondering why he is here what he is waearing but most importantly what he was doing !?
/" w-what?/" great I'm nervous again and the raspy voice of mine wasn't helping
/" I asked if you were ok ? /" He smiled and I melted .
/" y-yeah ../" I cleared my throat .
/" So you're feeling better ?/"
I looked at him puzzled .what was he talking about .wait does he know ? no way ?what ? or am I just sounding this bad .
/" Em ../" he started /" a couple of days ago you fainted in the school halls remember ? your friend Baekhyun he asked me to help and I kind of brought you to the nurse office .. so I was just wondering ../" he scratched the back of his neck explaining .
/" Oh y-yeah yeah , em I'm fine it was just a cold and .. thanks by the way /" I wanted to smile but I couldn’t I just remained like an awkward rock .
/" No prob .. you're Kyungsoo right .. the guy who works at the diner /" oh wow that’s the best way to describe a person .
/" yeah /" my voice fell slightly but he luckily didn't notice .
/" Cool I'm Jongin see you around I guess /"
I nodded as he smiled but before I left the store he stopped me with his voice .
/" Oh and you know , what yoona and the others say .. they're just bored .. don't let them get to you/" they already get to me .but its ok .
words don't leave bruises to cover up .
I just nodded smiling weak as I left .talking to Jongin always felt wonderful because he doesn’t have that tone in his voice that’s demanding or angry .I mean when I talk to beak ,Yixing or Eunji it’s not demanding either but .. it’s just different.
/" Took you long enough /" Seungsoo snapped as he grabbed the pouder out of my hand .
you are welcome .. not
and so I continued . I moved to eujins room and started cleaning thanking her mentally since she was obviously cleaning a bit herself .I know she has been busy with friends and school, so this is a help even though it’s just a little thing to do .I know she's trying and that’s enough I once even heard her talk to stepdad about my punishment he just yelled around and she apologized .thankfully .I don't need another one suffering from his hands .
after I cleaned her room I did the washing and as always got 3 boxes filling them with food for everyone. before I head to the diner .
I was probably a little late since I saw Yixing stand at the door, so I rushed the last few steps cursing at my back .
/" sorry /" I chuckled apologizing as I cough and adjusted my glasses brushing my hair off my eyebrows .
he just chuckled /" its ok no one is coming to the diner at this time anyway /" he smiled, and I returned it . letting him go in first .
he walked to the back getting his uniform and I stayed in the front setting the chairs down .as I already wore my uniform since this morning .. which meant Jongin had seen it and ..
he didn't really recognize me he just saw the uniform .
oh my god I'm so stupid ...
sighing mentally I would have loved to slap myself but it wouldn’t bring me anything .so I instead shoved those thoughts back placing the chairs down from the table and washing over it afterwards .
.
later that day the diner was still pretty much empty .there was only that one creepy guy I saw once looking at me .he somehow scares me .he had that weird look as if he was going to murder me .Yixing laughed at me because of that. telling me to not judge but he once looked at me from feet to head and as if examine me and I did not like it . he does that more times whenever I hand him the bill .
suddenly the doors flew open, and I flinched waking up from ..
wait I was sleeping ??
/" Kyungie !/" he called, and I smiled instandly looking as he jumped like red riding hood to the counter I had layed my hand onto.
/" you see that ?/" he turned in circles letting me admire his amazing suit .
it was dark blue with light blue inside, and he had a loop in the middle coloured in the same dark blue one as his suit .he looked stunning .
/" woaw/" I scanned him with my wide eyes, and he giggled grabbing into his pocket as he got out a mask .. a little thin though .it was a bright mask the same color as the light blue on the insides of his suit .
he put it on and I could see ..
everything still, it’s pretty much a usless mask .
/" em,.. you know that it’s a masquerade ball where you aren't supposed to recognize the other /"
/"I know but how am I supposed to shock channie when he can't see my face ?/" he smiled, and I returned it rolling my eyes
/" I wanted to ask you if you could help me with my hair .I knew you're good at this I mean I'm good too but I can't do it on myself /" I raised one eyebrow knowing that beak could damn well do it on his own .
/" mhm /" I had and disbelieve tone in my voice
/" yes /"
/" Baek .. your hair is already styled /" I chuckled washing over the counter once before looking at him again /" nice try but I won't go /"
/" Oh come on kyungie . I walked through the streets looking this good just to get to you ./" he whined like a kid pounting .
I imitated his pount /" but sport is healthy .. you're welcome /"
/" Not funny .. Yixing !/" he called, and I rolled my eyes .just then a customer came in and I grabbed a menu as soon as he sat down with his kid .
I greeted as always and handed them the menu taking the drink orders .as I return to beak and now Yixing as well .
/" I didn't know the ball was today /" that taller ass said acting shocked .
/" Ofcorse you didn't because kyungie tries with all his power to keep you away from this topic ./"
/" Yeah because he would only try to convince me like you as well /" I filled the 2 drinks with water and one with juice.
/" Why don't you want to go ? /" Yixing asked me, but I ignored at first .giving the customers their drinks luckily they don't want something to eat as well .
/" Because , what am I supposed to do there ?/"
/" Dance have fun enjoy life and for once not work or study or run away-/"
/" hey ! I never ran away /"
/" whatever /" Baekhyun turned away seeming upset now and I rolled my eyes .
/" Even if I wanted to I couldn’t ok my stepdad will be there too and he told me to stay here and work at the diner plus I don't have any suit neither mask and I look like a boy who crawled out of a dark hole /" I reasond with them brushing the hair on my eyebrows ubove the glasses .
Yixing seemed in thoughts while I now moved to those creepy men giving him the bill and asked the other men with the kid if they wanted something else .
when I returned Yixing glanced at me with a raised eyebrow, and I was about to ask why when he already answered.
/" You know the diner is pretty empty today so I could just take care of it it’s no big deal you've done it alone a dozen times /"
I sighed annoyed .why do they want me to go so bad it’s too late anyway the ball is in a few hours
/" but if he finds out-/"
/" he won't /" beak cut me off and layed a hand onto my shoulder /" it’s a madquerade ball we'll just style you so no one will recognize you. when does he return ?/" his eyes full of hope and determant .
/" midnight /" I answered short not believing that I actually answered instead of whining that I couldn’t .
/" Perfect then let’s start get you ready before the ball starts /" Yixing smiled and beak did as well .looking over me and probably thinking of how to change me .
well there is food there and it would be an aportunety to finally fill me for so long empty stomach
so ..did I actually just agree ?