(( There's a sequel following but it doesnt end in tension ))


Merely a punk .
That's all I was, an idiot 
telling myself, convincing myself that the world is only a dark broken place. 
The only friends I had were my cigarettes, the drug dealers. Now and then some beers .

I never planned anything or cared for anything since I always knew how pointless everything was . I was one human out of a millions. My existence wasn't worth more than than an ants. 
It's merely a waste of time.

It has always been dark .

until I met a spark.

Beautiful and pure . Something so rare and special that I couldn't take my eyes off of him . Yes him. 
I hated him for changing me .

But No matter how much I tried to push him away .
He wouldnt leave, because he knew me better than I did myself 
he knew I needed him . 
But he needed me too.

Man they thought I was fucked up .
But it's the ones who don't show .

My name is Kim Jongin and 
this isn't my story

It's Do Kyungsoos .

Intoxic Dose (kaisoo) 

With the sound of the door shutting i felt like something broke in me . So much regret so much hurt and so much guilt . I was no longer able to turn it all into anger . I was no longer able to convince myself that it was his fault .. neither that i hated him .

Groaning loudly i turned around heading for the stairs where my mum awaited me at the top of.

I just glared at her in anger not minding her much as i past her like she meant nothing but air to me .

I made my way to my room ignoring her calls for me i slammed the door after me . I felt like breaking , this was more its more than just about kyungsoo i knew i was connecting this with dad and with what happened.

I don't want to have any persons with this .. kindness and ... no I can't take seeing him get destroyed by the reality of this world .. like I did now .

I was just a part of this cruel world.

Me, The Chaos