Chapter 10: Rabble Rouser
Oftentimes, I thought of the Lord. I thought of his purposes for me, why he had left me cold and alone like this. But most of all, I wondered to him why he had allowed me to rebel against Him, to submit to the Goddess’ ways rather than His.
“I love You so much, Lord,” I cried, but even in my mind, it felt like a false plea, like it was anything but sincere.
His love for me, I had always known about on an intellectual level. But in my heart, as long as I had been alive, I knew that I had rejected His Spirit ultimately.
Blaspheme against the Holy Spirit.
And I knew that it was not a mere fabrication.
It was a fact of life. The entire Bible as I knew it was completely true.
It’s just that I didn’t have any desire or interest in submitting to it, or implementing it as part of my daily lifestyle.
“I love you so much, Daddy…”
I wanted something more.
So much more than what I was receiving on earth.