Chapter 10

He smiled, “now I can finally live my dreams of attending the academy, thanks to you mister” he playfully nudged me.

If this is how having a friend feels, then I would like to have more.

The feeling is one of warmth. A feeling I'll love to feel everytime.

“I will attend the academy with you, unleash my powers and find a suitable helper to be my queen”, truth be told, I want a suitable helper who will be my husband.

My heart beats fast when I look down from my balcony at the soldiers sparring half-naked. On days like that, whenever I watch them, I feel hilarious in my lower region.

Some other times, after the uncomfortable pain, my breeches will be soiled with a sticky yellowish white stain.

At first, I thought I felt the way I felt because I haven't seen a half-naked male before, but when I walked in on a maid drying her skin after her bathing, I don't feel anything, not the increased heartbeat or the uncomfortable tightening in my lower region.

I felt repulsed at the sight of her body.

My body didn't give a reaction, it liked what it saw. If it were to be a male in her place, I swear I would have felt something from her body.

My body would have reacted to the sight.

From then on, I concluded that females aren't for me, I might have one as a friend, but I can't feel for one.

“Do you mean to say a suitable husband instead of a wife?”

My heart nearly leapt out of my chest. 

 Is he aware of my preference, or is he just assuming?

Let me try my luck, maybe he's just assuming nothing more, “What do you mean by your question?”

He smiled, “you can tell me you know?

I've seen the way you look at the soldiers when you think no one is looking. No one might indeed have noticed, but I do. I see everything you do”, he winked.

Well, the cat is already out of the bag, it makes no sense trying to stuff it back in the bag it came out from.

Besides, the cat might not agree to be put back.

Who wants to be stuffed back into the hell it was stuffed in? Certainly not the escaped cat.

“You're not disgusted by the notion?”  I never told anyone my secret because I don't want them to look at me with disgust.

All the novels I've read only feature a male and a female, I've never read nor seen one featuring lovers of the same sex.

“Why should? It's not a crime to love someone of the same sex, our gods sometimes pair two individuals of the same sex together. It doesn't matter to me as long as you don't fall for me.

I hate what I don't like”, he winked.

I scrunched my nose up in disgust," yuck, you're like a brother to me. Romantically thinking of you makes me gag, I rather fall for a soldier than for you”.