Chapter 28

Her phone interrupted her reverie. She hissed furiously and searched for it in her handbag. She quickly picked the call before it ended. "Maryam? I've been at home for hours and I haven't seen you. Where are you now?" Mommy asked. "I was about to call you mommy. I want to spend the night at Aydah's place. I'll be back tomorrow morning In sha Allah."

Mommy sighed, "okay then but come back first thing tomorrow morning." Maryam replied her before ending the call. 

All she is now is sadness, every other emotion pushed from her being. Where there was the love, the light, the laughter is an aching hollowness. She was honest, truthful and full of more love for him than sh can ever understand. She has been soft, kind and gentle - yet apparently all that is negated by being too soft. And people wonder why girls hide behind false stupidity. All she is, is a female, why the hell didn't he just see her that way? Why did he had to call her names? After he used her..... he turned her into his toy he plays with whenever wishes. 

She slowly rose up, holding her head. She sauntered into Mahmud's main room. He has a picture of her smiling at the sun and happy as ever on his bedside. She lay on his bed, eyes closed. Her chest heaved with a quiet sob, and tears welled up behind her eyelids, slipping down her cheeks without resistance. Another sob wracked her, followed by a thin wail. She curled on her side and wept, shoulders heaving.

When her thoughts became nonsense, and all the more interesting for it, she knew she was falling asleep. Now all she had to do was let go.

••

"My turn baby," she said with a chuckle. "Okay, never have I ever been skydiving." 

"What you have never done that? We have to try it.... it's so fun." Her eyes widened and she shook her head. "I'm so afraid of heights....." she replied. "How... how do you fly planes then? C'mon you'd be fine. We're doing this tomorrow," he said fetching his phone from his pocket. 

"No Mahmud I can't....." she paused and bite her lips. "You've forgotten..... too much air would affect me...." she chuckled nervously. He kept the phone beside him and smiled. "You're the strongest girl I've ever known my whole life, baby. You don't let anything bother you." She smiled sheepishly, fiddling with her fingers. He love how she's always jovial. She never allows anything to bother her. Not even her sickness.  

"Now my turn," he said to brighten up the atmosphere. They were having a picnic and have been spending time all day playing games and talking about their future together. "Never have I ever eaten a Krispy Kreme donut."

"Nooo...." she gasped. "Who on earth haven't tried that doughnuts? It's like the most popular donut place ever..."

He laughed and shook his head. "We should go get the donuts today or tomorrow, and I'm hundred percent sure you'd love it." She said with a smirk. He shrugged off his shoulders.

"I really had a rough time few months ago. Someone made me feel like I should never try being in love but In you I see the chance for that kind of love they say doesn't exist anymore. The type that spans far longer than one lifetime. I want a love that's passion and determination, fire with earth, yet is also a serenity souls can dwell in forever. It's not the kind of love for mortals, lover, so come if you dare. It takes courage to walk into the light after a lifetime of semi-shadows; it takes the heart of a lion because no-one survives its loss. So forever or bust, let's go, hmm?" 

"Well, I'm happy I changed that and I'm so glad that you chose me." She smiled with a hot blush. Even without telling a soul it was soon common knowledge that Mahmud and Habiba were lovers. It was in the way their gazes lingered on one another, the way their voices became softer and in the shy grins they'd never worn before. In casual conversation they stood that little bit closer than folks usually do, their body language so open and relaxed. 

Her eyes enthralled on him. His eyes were like crisp toffee drizzled in melted chocolate and framed with darling lashes. A blade nose and burrowed cheekbones, his appearance only to die for. She couldn't help to notice leathery black strands flopping over his face which to her distaste was veiling some of his enticing features. So perfect, yet so frustrating that she could bear no social contact with that sensuous man. Damnit. 

It's his lips that makes the sun setting faster than usual. The world stops spinning as he leans in with promise scrawled on his cupids bow. Her stomach turns over as her mind races to places she didn't know it could go until she realize they were still in public. All she wanted was to have a taste of his lips put they're keeping it Halal till they make it official. His honey light brown eyes connect with hers as her world shatters and he asks her what she was thinking of. 

"Why do you like me?" She whispered, her hands tracing the lace on her Abaya, connecting them with invisible lines like a dot – to – dot. "How could I not?" He replied, moving closer to her so her beautiful eyes met his own. She frowned at his answer and looked away. He chuckled and shook his head. He loved the fading sunset behind her eyes, the moonlight that danced through her hair, the sadness nestled in the creases of her palms. He loves all of her, not just the parts that make sense, not just the parts that she has shown me. He loves the parts of her that he doesn't yet understand, the parts that weigh on her shoulders, the parts he only noticed when he steals glances at her in the silence. "How could I not, my love? I like who I am when I'm with you. Even when things get really tough, I'm a better version of myself."

"You have no idea how I love love love you so so much. I mean who needs to go shopping when I already have found the one thing I needed the most?"

He laughed musically at the way she was trying to flirt with him. "You're just so.... different." 

She packed the left over snacks into the basket and stood up while he folded the mat because it was starting to get real cold out side and she wasn't supposed to be outside when it's cold. He took her home with the promise they'll try the donuts she bugged him about the next day. 

Mahmud went home same time Ahmad did. "Lover boy, you're back already," Ahmad teased as they walked into the house together. Mahmud laughed and shook his head. They settled down in the living room. "I'm glad you have finally moved on. I pray this is the best for you both," Ahmad said turning on the TV. 

Like something stabbed him on the buttock, he scrambled up and fetched his phone out of his pocket. He dialed on his brother's number while walking out to the backyard. After three rings, Mujahid picked up, "speak!" He spoke rudely. Mahmud massaged his temple and ignored his rude behavior. 

"Seriously Mujahid? You decided to break that poor girl's heart? Maryam did nothing but showed you love but you decided to stupidly use her and later get married...."

"I did what is right please...." Mujahid cuts him off. "That girl you call your best friend is nothing but a little slut else she would not be giving out her body...."

"Don't ever call her a slut, Mujahid!" He raises his voice. Mujahid did a little laugh and continued, "what I am trying to say is that girl is not a wife material! I doubt if that girl is a....."

"Mujahid...." he said sternly. "You have just lost a precious gem, I'm telling you. Maryam is the best girl you'll ever get but you chose to throw away a diamond to pick up stones..... you'll regret what you did to that poor girl...." he furiously ended the call. 

Mahmud ran his hand through his close cropped hair three times in quick succession. He was mad at her for letting his brother play her like that.... His temper was like TNT, once the sparks started to sizzle there was very little time to duck and cover. He wanted to call her that moment but he knew hurtful words are the only thing that would come out from his mouth. He took deep breaths to calm himself from doing anything when angry. 

Whatever happened, she caused it and he did his best to protect her. After all she asked him to stay away from her life so he had nothing to do with her again.... he shrugged everything off and went back inside. 

••

Habiba chatted their whole drive to Crispy Kreme Donuts. The moment they arrived, she squealed and clapped her hands. She never seizes to amaze him with how she's always jovial. They stepped out of the car and entered the place. "I will order for you," she whispered to his ear as they walked further in. 

She was a regular costumer there. The moment they reached to the counter, one of the workers there smiled at her and greeted her. "The usual please and I'd like it to be packed in a take away," she said politely. Mahmud brought out his wallet but she stopped him. 

"Love, please let me pay," she pleaded. "What? No, I'll pay, don't worry." She furrowed her brows and gave him a pointed look. "Okay, okay.... anything you want," he said laughing.

After getting the crispy doughnuts, they headed out of the bakery. "Let's go back to my place and watch a movie," she suggested. He opened the door for her and she entered before he closed. He entered also and started the car. "Sounds fun even though I don't watch movies but for you, I would do anything you want to make you happy." 

"You know the right words to use to make me smile," she said softly. 

They arrived at Habiba's place few moments later and entered. She met her mother in the kitchen cooking dinner. "Mommy, come, Mahmud is here." She grabbed her mother's hand and pulled her out. "Wait, hold on let me wear my hijab first, baby." She laughed at Habiba's silly behavior. 

She wore her hijab she always kept on the kitchen stool and they both headed out to the living room. He was speaking together with Habiba's half sister. He squatted down and greeted her mother in respect. 

"I'll go call my father now," she smiled and walked out of the living room, leaving him with her mother and half sister. 

Habiba's father is a Nigerian. He met Habiba's mother in University Of East London and they got married after two years even when they knew their genotype wasn't a match. They kept it a secret till they gave birth to their first and only child Habiba who is a sickle cell patient. They stopped giving birth and years later, they adopted a child from the orphanage to avoid making another mistake. 

Habiba is a strong warrior fighting battles for her life. She had passed every crisis she has went through regarding her sickness. All the men she dated left her because of her condition. But when Mahmud came, he had changed everything for her. He has changed her life in just few weeks. 

"You must be Mahmud," he heard a deep voice called out. He looked up at the man who was smiling at him. Mahmud smiled back and greeted him politely. They shook hands and settled down. Habiba sat down beside her father. 

"I'm very delighted to see that my daughter has finally met someone," he said still smiling at Mahmud. Mahmud smiled sheepishly and nodded. After they spoke for a while, her father went upstairs while they watched the movie she chose. 

"So let me ask again, she can't go out to anywhere because she has a rear disease? Weird," he shook his head. "Baby just watch," she said laughing. "Love is everything you know.... because of love..... pffftt just watch....." She says giving him the bowl of popcorn. "Does she die at the end?" He asked looking at her face. Her eyes were fixed on the tv, "shhh just watch," she whispered and threw a popcorn in her mouth. 

"I bet she dies at the end," he whispered sinking into the soft couch. She hit him with a pillow making him to laugh. "I'll stop.... watching movies.... with you if you'd keep asking questions to distract me," she spoke hitting him with the soft pillow. He loved how she spoke. Her British accent is so elite. 

"Ok, ok I'm sorry..... I'll stop asking questions and concentrate," he apologized laughing. “You better.....” His phone vibrated indicating a new message. He checked to see it was from Aydah. He sighed after reading the text message and called her.