Chapter 94
LAYLA'S POV
He was more gentle this time than he'd ever been. I liked the mixture of softness and intensity in his caresses. My hands remained on his shoulders, gripping tightly. My chest heaving and slight worry in my mind. As much as I'd like to pretend that it was just like the other times, it wasn't. This time I had left go of all the restrictions. I was giving him full access. He could literally do anything that he wanted to do. He reached back and unhooked my bra, tossing it aside before he sucked my nipple into his mouth, th heat if it adding to the impact, making me reach for his hair and dig my fingers inside.
" Relax, you're stiff, " he murmured, tracing kisses up my skin until he got to my lips. Our tongues danced together, my back arching as I pushed all the other thoughts away from my mind.
" Are you scared?" he asked. His eyes focused on mine and the most affectionate look on his face. I shook my head and he smiled.
" Nervous?"
I swallowed hard, thought of what I was offering him and nodded. Not wanting to freak out and change my mind, it was either Gabriel or no one else because I was never going to let another man touch me. It didn't matter what happened between us after this, there was never going to be another man for me.
He smirked, his hand on my hip and his erection pressed against my thigh. He said nothing, instead he unzipped my zipper and took off my jeans along with the lace I had on underneath. Then he sat back on his heels and looked at me with a somewhat dark gaze, his eyes hooded.
I looked away, realizing that I was never going to be comfortable with him looking at me like that. My body wanted him, I wanted to reach out and pull him towards me once more. But I dag my hands into the covers instead and I watched him wrap both hands around my ankles and slowly part my legs.
His breath on my inner thigh had my muscles calling out to him. He reached up with his right hand and expertly used his fingers to tease my nipple. Rolling the hardened tip between his fingers before he did the same to the other. My eyes closed, I focused specifically on feeling his touches. He gently used his teeth to graze the skin of my inner thigh, then he moved up. He gazed up at me with that seductive smirk still in place, then I watched in equal fascination and ecstasy as he parted and lapped at me. His tongue a tool he expertly knew how to use. My lips parted, a sharp breath escaped the space. My fingers threaded into his hair as I urged him on. I was never going to get enough of that, his tongue was like magic.
He had my body shaking uncontrollably and my throat almost drying because I couldn't stop the moans. And once the effect of the orgasm had died down, he came back up and kissed me.
" Better?"
I nodded when the dizziness died down. Feeling special because it was evident whatever he did was aimed at calming me down.
" Good, there's nothing to fear sweetheart. I'm here, am I not?"
I nodded again. My sucking in a breath when I felt his fingers gently press at my entrance, at first it was a gentle and soothing massage that had me rocking back in forth in a manner that could not be helped. Then my grip on him tightened when he began pushing his fingers into me.
" Gabriel!"
" That's it, where's the Layla that liked it rough?" It sounded almost as if he were challenging me, his eyes confirmed it.
" You want this, " it wasn't a question but rather a fact that he casually put out there, I tried to glance a way but he made a tsking sound with his tongue.
" Eyes on me sweetheart, " he chuckled, his entire demeanor changing, turning almost intimidating. He got off the bed and took off the sweats he had on before climbing back up and on top of me.
" I'm struggling here, " he said, strain to his voice. I looked down at his length, as hard as I had ever seen it and I licked my lips, I couldn't help it. He hissed as if in pain.
" Come on, let me see that need you're so desperately trying to hide. " He returned to his torture, teasing me with his hand, driving his fingers slowly in and out, I couldn't help it anymore. My mind was going nuts, my entire being was aching. I wanted something more and he knew it. So I figured that there was no need to mess around either, if he wanted me to play along then I would. I pulled him down shot him a serious look.
" Angry, are we?" he teased despite being in obvious torment.
" Stop messing around, " he stopped what he was doing and I shook my head, I was seconds away from begging but luckily I regained my senses.
" What do you want?" He asked. I swallowed, then I reached down with the momentary confidence and wrapped my hand around his base. He cursed, closing his eyes before he firmly held my hips, and in the countless minutes that followed I was more willing to engage.
🌼💮🌼💮🌼💮
I squeezed my eyes shut. I had read and watched enough books and movies to know that the first time might hurt, but I hadn't expected the pain to be so intense. I was seconds away from asking Gabriel to let it be.I hated pain. But I also knew that I couldn't do that, deep down I didn't want to. I had started that something and I was going to carry through with it to the end, I pressed my forehead to his shoulder and concentrated on steadying my breathing instead of the pain
He stopped moving and called out my name.
" Hey, easy now. Well take it slow okay?"
His dualism was almost scary, how could he change his character so fast and take in another role in seconds. One moment he teased me, the next he was stern then out of that blue he became caring.
" He thrust a little deeper and I dug my teeth into his shoulder, it was an unconscious act but he seemed to like it. He made a deep sound of approval from the back of his throat. Then he pushed further in and pursed my lios shut. Wasn't it supposed to be pleasurable pain? There was no pleasure in that pain whatsoever.
" Okay?" he asked me and I nodded.
" Liar!" he accused. I glanced down,and I my entire face fell on realizing I hadn't even taken half of him in yet, and I didn't know how much longer I could take.
" Okay that's it, enough of this, " he suddenly said and I was scared, thinking he had changed his mind. But then he cradled my face in his hand and placed a gentle kiss on my cheek.
" Do you trust me?"
" Of course not!" I said immediately after, he rolled his eyes and then without notice he suddenly just thrust into me at once. I wanted to scream, my nails dug into the flesh of his back and in those few seconds I really hated him and I wished he could burn in hell. I felt actual tears form in my eyes and fall down my cheeks as I wondered what on earth was wrong with him and how he could be so cruel. He stayed still at first, then he slowly starting to move. And as he did I felt something build itself inside me. He began these delirious slow motions back and forth, I heated up from the inside out. And then I felt it, the pain was still there but it was slowly being overtaken by a feeling so intense my mind lacked the mental capacity to endure it.
" Oh God! " I exclaimed and he stopped moving to stare down at me.
" You good-"
" Don't stop!"
He would have probably laughed had he not been in a worse off state. And I realized that I wanted more, I liked the slow and languid movements but they weren't close to being enough.
" Gabriel, " the number of times I called his name without saying anything was just crazy. He responded, then he hit a place inside me that had my back arching up and my hips bucking to meet his movements. It helped a bit so I resolved to doing it over and over until I was basically in charge. But then he gripped my hips and made me stop.
" Easy there, we don't want you to sore, and I'm planning on stretching out this night. "
I shook my head when he went back to the lazy thrusts, I almost wanted to yell at him but couldn't because the pleasure was building up on itself until it reached a peak greater than I could comprehend.
" Fucking hell!" he cursed into the crook of my neck. Holding onto his own orgasm by a mere breath. I could tell he was close, and so was I. So I did the first thing that came to mind and wrapped my legs around him, pulling him further into me than he had been before. He looked at me with raw intensity, then he quickened his thrusts and within no time I was calling out his name yet again. His own moans were like a drug, and they made me close my eyes and picture him in my mind because looking at him was almost too much to bear.
💮🌼💮🌼💮
With my head on his chest I thought about what would happen from that point onwards. I recalled his words and fought not to smile. I knew I was acting the opposite of how I was supposed to, it would have made more sense had I been scared. Because never in a million years would I have ever been comfortable with being Gabriel's girlfriend. But I also knew that not a lot would change. As far as everyone knew, Arden and I were still a couple, so the change was something only we were aware of. My heartbeat increased and I bit my lower lip.
Then I asked myself whether Gabriel knew the actual way I felt for him. Whether he was even aware of the fact that I loved him because I did. I had never been in love before but I was sure about it. I loved him so much it scared me. And now he completely owned every part of who I was. I couldn't turn back now because there was nowhere else to go. And the fact was that I no longer wanted to run, he had done everything in his power to make sure I stayed by his side and it would be unfair to run off again. He had been right, in some ways I was really full of pride. Of course it wasn't as large as his but it was somewhere on the same scale.
" He stoked his hand up and down my back, then he kissed the top of my head and sighed. Like he was also thinking about something. I wondered what it was but didn't dare ask. Did he love me as well? I couldn't know for sure but I was sure that he did. Otherwise why would he have gone to all the trouble of bringing me back. And I now knew that it wasn't really about the sex. Something told me that to him, the word care equaled to love and each time he told me he cared for me what he really meant was that he loved me. Had I been confident I would have told him, but it was better to wait till he told me first because I was still scared. Not being sure made me cautious. I'd die if I told him I loved him and he refused to say it back.
I played my fingertips over his skin and glanced up at him. Looking away and smiling when I found him staring at me.
" I'm sorry about your parents, " I said and the smile he had on his features disappeared.
" Let it be, there's nothing to be sorry for. "
" Maybe their had their reasons?"
He shrugged, clearly not interested in the subject. And when I wanted to say something else concerning it he kissed me.
" Are you trying to shut me up?"
" I am. And I need you, " he took my hand in his and moved it into the blankets before he placed it on his erection. My eyes widened in faked shock, then I asked him how much stamina he possessed.
" Let's find out, shall we? "
I found myself wrapping my fingers around his length. There was literally nothing about that man that I didn't love. Even when he drove me mad I still loved him.
He covered his body with mine. Settling himself between my legs again and locking our free hands together.
" For someone who was terrified a while ago, you sure do seem eager. "
" I wasn't terrified!"
He scoffed, then he told me that I had almost made him pull out.
" I'm glad you didn't, " I confessed, a shy smile playing at the corner of my lips and my eyes on his.
" I'm sure you are. Actually in a few days I'm certain you'll be ready to learn about angles. "
" What?"
He laughed and shook the statement off. Then he grew serious and I shrieked when he held me by my thighs and pulled me lower on the mattress. Glancing down for a second before he threw the covers aside.
" I like the visual almost as much as the action itself, " he told me. His eyes focused on my center. I went to take my hand away from where I felt him a he shook his head, warning me against doing so.
" Go ahead, " He leaned so close to my ear I shivered. " Put me where you want me to be, "
The wave of embarrassment that washed through me was terrifying, I wondered how he could make me feel so comfortable yet so shy at the same time.
" Hurry up,I'm dying to fuck you. Long..slow....deep. "
His lack of inhibitions was a trait I liked, knowing that he would always speak his mind without reservations attracted me to him all the more. I wondered how he expected me to do what he asked though, but as it often was when it came to him, I found a way and did it either way.
Afterwards, I finally realized that I had been so into everything I completely forgot about Arden. He could have literally walked in on us at any second. But Gabriel ensured me that he wasn't around, that we had the house entirely to ourselves. And that entire night he made sure I understood that I was his, purely his. As if I had ever belonged to another.