Chapter 2

We've only officially began dating six months ago. He's been having this affair for four months now. "Look Arya, I've found what I wanted. It would be cruel of me to keep deceiving you, so I'm letting you go. I suggest you do the same". His voice is complacent, like he's talking to a child. A child who can't seem to let that one piece of happiness in her life go, just cause he found someone who would throw herself at him. His face is looking at me intently now, those brown eyes that told me they lived me, lifeless. He was lying all along.

"You never loved me did you?" I ask voice barely a whisper. He hears me though and shame fills his eyes. I pick myself up from the floor and walk as fast as I can out the door. "Arya, wait!!" I hear him say but that doesn't matter anymore. I'm not stopping. I walk and see a guy staring at me from the other side of the apartment. His eyes hold pity and disgust. That breaks me even more. I'm stupid. I'm a fool for thinking I could be happy. I'm a fool for thinking life would treat me any better. The wind starts to blow heavily and the presence of goosebumps on my skin tells me a storm is coming. I don't care though. My feet take me to the city park. The park where we met. The park where he waited for me to show up every day after my third breakup. The park I gave my heart out to him. 

The first drop of rain hits me on the forehead and I go down on my knees. The tears escape me silently. The future I saw with Aron is over. The happiness we wanted is gone. My happy ending is gone. The voices of people who told me I'm nothing but worthless come back again. They scream in my ear. I told you you'd never be happy. An orphan can't be happy. You're nothing. You'll always be nothing.

I scream and sob as hard as I can. It seems to relieve me of the pain a little but the hurt is still there. My heart is still throbbing from the pain. Shattered once more, broken. The rain is coming down in torrents now and my clothes cling to my skin. The wind is brutal and I'm shivering down to my bones. I see a little alcove, a familiar alcove, the same place I nestled when I faced my third breakup. I walk there with hardly any sensation in my legs. The concrete bench is wet but I sit on it anyways. My mind is calmer now that I've been thoroughly drenched by the rain. I still can't grasp what has happened though.

Arons words come back to me. I"can't date a distrusting girl". Was that what I was. I told him about the abuse I'd faced in other relationships, i told him how I had to date people just to survive. I told him how I'd struggled ever since I was a child. I didn't hear myself screaming but the water falling on me suddenly stops. I look up and see someone holding an umbrella over me. "It's not safe to scream at night".