Chapter 246

Almost a few minutes after that bored look at appeared on my face I saw his own go down cast. I saw his face look so downcast it felt like all the brightness that had been in it a few minutes before had simply been stripped off and thrown into some sort of distance.

It made me feel undeniably sad and unprepared for the effect this sort of look has of me. It made me feel like I could simply run mad knowing that I was the one that caused him to feel such sadness, because I decided to feel uninterested in what he was talking about. All in all I had to apologize and tell him that I wasn't acting bored because of him, i was bored because of the myriad of emotions that were running through me right now.

He had asked me exactly what emotions that were and I simply decided to keep my mouth shut. I doubt it would be anything of a discouragement if I told him that i was feeling fuzzy inside whenever I looked at his face. I doubt it would be anything of a discouragement if I told him that I could not think straight whenever he was near me like now, I simply hated the way my mind automatically moved to the unable to think mode whenever I was sitting near him. At least normally i know now I can still make some reasonably hard decisions, but if I am with him, if I am near him then there is practically no way that I can settle on thinking of anything worthwhile.

I'm guessing that it will be a discouragement if I told him that I was thinking of Eras instead of him but I simply decide to keep my mouth shut, because it will be petty of me. It will bear down on the nice notion of me.

I realise now that I actually do not want them to chase me. I wanted to discourage him, I do not want to encourage that particular notion that I feel is rising up in between these random questions. He is asking me so many random questions that seems always border on what I like and what I would want to have. I wouldn't really be surprised if I woke up tomorrow morning and I saw a huge teddy bear at the front of my door too.

I would earn something of a glare from Scott and an excited squeal from Oakley, this was actually serious meat, it scares me that I might be getting into a relationship much more faster than I had anticipated. I had not anticipated getting into a relationship at any point again in my life but yet these two people, these two little undeniably handsome monsters who ahad reared thier heads inside my life would simply not let me go at this point.

I am still left wondering where one of those monsters is. I remember he had been looking for Scott when we had left him, and I had seen Scott today, but still I have not seen him.