Chapter Thirty Seven (Hello Again)

He also wanted to know what Cassie had told her that made her disappear on him like that. He planned letting her know of how he wasn't in anything romantic relationship with Cassie or planned to be.

He was done being upset at her or at Albert. Everything that happened there he planned to put behind him.

For the first that in a long time he could agree that he really found a girl that he liked.

Maybe Margi was right, he shouldn't let his uptight attitude stop him from getting something that he liked. And maybe " cherished" was the word.

He had sat there, rested on his chair as he thought about Amanda for over a good twenty minutes.

He sat up, balancing himself on his chair, now putting his attention on his laptop, as he tried to look at a few files.

He heard a faint knock on his door twice as Amanda just made her way into his office

~New~

Amanda stepped into his office as she noticed him sitting up and adjusting his position. She avoided an eye contact with him as she moved closer to him, placing his coffee on his table.

"Will that be all?" She enquired. 

She knew she wasn't really very ready to face him and that would explain the reason why she felt hot and sweaty. She hoped this would be all, so she would run back to her desk and not be called by him again.

Ray saw how she tried fighting off any feelings, managing to sound almost professional. He wanted to get over this, he wanted this rift between them to end. He wanted them to have a conversation, a decent one. 

He freed his tie and shirt as he stood from his chair, she wasn't so far from his desk, making her very close to where he was now standing. Close in quite a toxic way. "Toxic" was an odd way to describe distance, but those who get it, get it.

"We should talk." He said casually but it came from a resolving part of his heart.

"Talk about?" She responded casually and very unlike her, in a nonchalant tone. He totally understood if she was upset about something.

"About London." He said as he noticed that in all that masked composure was her old nature just beneath. He noticed how she avoided an eye contact with him.

'Wheww! She wanna be such a tough nut to crack huh?' He thought to himself.

"I returned to the hall where I had left you and didn't find you there. I believe you to be upset about something." Ray said as he found himself slightly moving closer to her and for a second his gaze almost trapped her like it used to but she had immediately moved back.

"I'm not upset, I have nothing to be upset about. Or do I?"  She said casually almost with a smile. 

He was a little stunned the way she reacted towards him. That was new to him, not just her new attitude being new to him but that attitude from anyone would be new to him.

He looked past how he felt about her obvious change in character, he knew how much damage Cassie was capable of causing. 

"We should talk about everything that happened in London, especially what ever Cassie had told you" He spoke as he moved close to her once again, closing the distance between them. 

"Cassie and I are nothin ........"

"Respectfully sir, I do not want to know, nor do I care about what the deal is with you and your ex lover. Forgive me if that's not her current title as I could never be so sure" 

He watched her speak, with his eyes directly on hers as she spoke very fluently without stuttering.

He admired her new found confidence and at the same time hated it.

He had never been shut out or rejected.

Never been rejected, especially not by a woman. He barely chased anyone. And he honestly preferred it that way. The women he had been with never put him through any talking or explanation process because he actually didn't like them like that. And if you didn't like him, he wouldn't notice because he cared less.

Somewhere within him, how a strange anger was tempted to erupt. An anger he had tamed and mastered. An anger he had put behind him as he locked it's monster in the deepest part of his heart.

But somehow, her closeness to him tamed that evil within him. Her fragrance. oh, how he missed it.

He found his gaze trapped with hers, in hers! How her attitude didn't do much in easing the way he truly felt about her.

His gaze somehow trailed to her lips as he noticed it slightly part from each other. 

He saw her fragility again,  her eyes became soft and kind.

He slightly tilted his head as his gaze returned to her eyes before slightly moving them down her calling lips.

He was now too close to her that their nostrils could touch. He felt her warm intense breath as she shut her eyes. 

How he missed her! Her scent! The feel of her body next to his.

The air between them had become so intense. For a second, Ray felt like the air in the room was doing the bare minimum because it suddenly didn't feel sufficient enough for two people.

His hands had somehow found its way to her waist as it held unto it. They stood like that for a split second before Amanda suddenly broke out of his embrace and Ray suddenly felt as though a huge burning flame has been quenched within him.

'What was the problem?' 

'What did Cassie say to her that got to her so much? Amanda had never been like this, no his Amanda!'

"You shouldn't. You shouldn't do that" He heard her say.

Ray freed himself from his tie once more before he turned, running is hand through his hair. 

Was it normal how his experience to rejection made him feel?

He was suddenly outraged and he some how knew it was the dark side in him.

Oh rejection didn't taste good to him. 

He hated this, he hated this feeling and it sure wasn't normal. It must be his damaged side crawling back in and he almost didn't have the power to curb it.

His whole aura had changed, he was loosing it. Was it simply because she moved away from him or was it because he was simply incapable accepting rejection? Maybe Amanda had sensed his energy because she immediately spoke.

"I would like to take my leave now if there is nothing else you will be needing me to help you with."

He still had his back before her, but he heard that tone again. 

That tone that made him feel like she didn't want anything to do with him except work wise.

Amanda was almost hypnotized just seconds ago by his gaze.

She almost curled into his arm, almost fell for his alluring eyes. His calling lips, his captivating scent. But something about his gaze. He must also gaze at his other mistresses like that, because why do they go head over hills for him?

He saw her as just a fling, she wasn't any special than those other girls. She might actually be less special than the others because she lacked class and maybe glamour. But she rather go where she would be appreciated to find happiness and that was not with Raymond.

He turned, now facing her and his expression wasn't the same as when he stood close to her.

He suddenly changed and he looked angered.

She was confused because if any one was to be provoked, it definitely shouldn't be him.

"Is Albert the reason behind this? Or what is? Why have you suddenly changed?"

Amanda was shocked to hear that, confused even. She didn't know the one to decipher first. Was it that he thought she didn't have a reason to be the way she now is or Was it the fact that he now sounded and  looked upset. And why was he upset?

Was his anger mostly channeled on Albert or was it simply because she was beginning to have a stand.

Was this how badly he hated rejection? Was her rejection driving him crazy?

"I would be leaving now if you have no work related need" she said but still stood there hoping to get his approval. His silence would have still answered the questions.

She watched him turn again, running his hand through his hair like he was fighting an unseen battle. 

She turned, now approaching the exit before his voice put her to a stop.

Don't you even dare to leave when I am speaking to you! He said with his almost usual tone, but it emitted all shades of wrong and she was not having it.

'Why was he so upset when he had almost no right to.'

She turned now facing him as he stood in distance. "What are you gonna do if I do?"

Yes, she was upset, but that was not what she would have preferred to say, and especially not to her employer.

"What am I gonna do?" She heard him repeat and surprisingly in a plain manner as he let out a chuckle.

"What am I gonna do?" He asked again in almost the same tone before he immediately flipped, causing Amanda to flinch.

You wanna know what I am gonna do!?!?!!! 

DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I AM CAPABLE OF DOING!?!? 

AMANDA! ANSWER ME!

At this point his voice was in the loudest tone she had ever heard it. His eyes were red and his face showed too many confusing emotions.

Amanda flinched with each sentence and at this point she was close to shaking.

And he wasn't finished yet!

Hello lovelies. 

My sincere apology for taking too long to continue my daily update. It was due to medical challenges, but I am alot stronger now.

Thank you for understanding.