CHAPTER 26

       "Carly,don't leave me please!"

       "I'm sorry but I have to."

   Dylan wasn't even sure she had heard her right.Even though she'd had a feeling it was something to do with them,she was not prepared for this.She didn't know if her fragile heart could handle it any more.Carly had walked away from her for the second time.She didn't even know what was worse,breaking up with her without a reason or breaking up with her just because she thought they were too young to fall in love.Or was there someone else that she was not telling her? That thought cut her insides like a grass cutter and she felt like her heart was pumping hot flames instead of blood.She felt dizzy and as if her feet would give away on the very ground she was standing on.She needed to hold on to something, to grip at something and feel if this was happening in the real world or if she was just dreaming and would wake up soon and the terrible dream,nightmare would go away.The tears in her eyes blinded her that all she could see was a blurry image of the girl she had loved in her young age walking away from her.She didn't even turn around, not even for a second. She walked away and left her standing there,in the place they had first made contact with each other, the place they had first talked.

      She felt her feet lose balance and she staggered back. She knew if she didn't sit down, the fall to the ground would be hard and painful. She tried to get down slowly but just before she reached the floor,someone grabbed her with strong but tender arms.A hand landed on her face and she tried to clear her sight.She felt the person wipe away some of her tears.The scent felt so familiar but she had no recollection of it.Then she talked and her emotions came crumbling down one after another.

      "Dylan, what's wrong sweetie? What happened to you?You look so pale!"

       "Mom!" her voice broke a midst of tears.

       "Where's Carly?I thought you were with her."

       "She's gone mom.She broke up with me for good."

       "No,don't say that.She came back the other time."

 Dylan shook her head slowly, "Not this time.She isn't coming back this time.I had so many plans for us in my head,to get into college and work really hard so we could eventually graduate and be together."

          "I know baby.I'm so sorry."

Tears poured out of her eyes in torrents and she didn't even try to hold them back. Her mother pulled her closer to her chest and rubbed her back soothingly and reassuringly.She sobbed and for several minutes, she forgot where they were until her mother nudged her and led her towards the car.While the other students were counting one chapter of their highschool life closed,she was counting two and one hurt like hell and she was fairly certain it would affect her life from that moment onwards. 

                  *****

       That day when Carly walked away from Dylan at the gym,she didn't go back home with her brother or her parents. She made an excuse about having to go get a coffee with Dylan and her mother. Of course the parents had believed her but Carl had looked at her questioningly. It was as if he felt like everything was not okay.It was as if he could see right through her. He had left though and Carly had gone looking for Aimee.It was by then already past six and so they just got in a guy's truck and left together.

      Several minutes later,they stopped at a clearing at the edge of the forest where several other people were waiting.She didn't know most of them and she guessed they must have been from other schools in the neighborhood.She followed Aimee slowly but had an underlying fear of what went on there.Judging from how the place looked, it was a regular hang out base.Just a few paces from there was the river they used to go swimming with Dylan. She looked towards the direction and what had happened with Dylan just a few minutes ago flashed across her mind.She saw her tears falling uncontrollably, she heard her voice begging her not to leave her but she hadn't listened. She saw her pain yet she didn't stop to think about it or even hug her to reassure her. Right there and then,she knew that she was indeed a bad person.She had been terrible to Dylan, her first love and she now hated herself for not figuring herself out early enough and save her all that pain and heartbreak.

    She turned away from the direction of the river and tried to push the thoughts away.Upon turning,she stood still, shocked and surprised. 

        "Carl,wh...what are you doing here?" she stammered. "I thought you went home earlier."

        "Following you and I'm glad I didn't go because you are about to make a bad decision."

  She tried to get past him but he was too fast and stronger than her. "What are you doing with these guys?They are just pot heads and drug addicts."

         "Not all of us here are,we just come for the fun," Aimee said interrupting them.She then turned to Carly,"I thought we agreed on bringing a cool person? "

        "I'm sorry,I didn't even know he was...." 

         "No,I'm cool I promise," Carl said quickly. "You have nothing to worry about."

         "Good."

    Aimee then walked away from them to join a group of guys.Carly turned to her brother in anger.

        "We may be getting along now but that doesn't mean you can tell me what to do.I'm just here to have fun with the rest so I'd really appreciate if you just left me alone."

    Carl backtracked, "Whoa,what's up your butt?"

         "Maybe nothing,maybe everything. Take your pick."

          "Seriously, what happened earlier? I only followed you because I noticed the unsettling look in your eyes earlier. You didn't even tell me what happened with Dylan or even why you wanted to break up with her."

        "Hey,come grab a drink while it's still fresh from the cooler!" Aimee announced waving a bottle in the air.

         "I did break up with her and it was bad.Now all I want is to forget the whole ordeal.I'll go grab a drink, do you want one?"

     Carl looked at her wide eyed,"You have never even drunk before. It might be risky."

         "Well, I have been stealing mom's wine for two years now.I'm not new to alcohol. A little beer doesn't cause any harm."

  Carl shook his head,"Mom is going to be so mad about this."

          "It's a good thing you are not going to tell her,right?"

      With that statement, Carly headed forward and grabbed to bottles. She handed one to him and immediately dug into hers.One drink turned into two then three and she didn't even realize she had had too much. How she got a cigarette in her hands wasn't even explainable but luckily her brother came to her rescue and threw it away to the ground and trampled it much to the anger of the owner.He dragged her towards the car and got her inside.

    She began laughing as soon as se had settled in her seat.It was a good thing her brother understood her situation.

        "Fuck Carly,what did you got us into?"

        "Relax big bro,you just had one drink. Surely you can get us home in one piece," she laughed. "Don't be so stuck up."

        "If mom and dad know this  they are going to kill me for letting you do this."

        "You followed me remember?"

          "Yeah,I'll always do that for you. You are my sister and regardless of where we stand,I'll follow you to deeps end."

        "Aaw!That's sweet."

           "Jesus Carly! What happened to you?"

         "I broke up with Dylan not the other way round."

        "Yeah,but why?You two were so good together."

 She scoffed, "Dreams, reality versus imaginations." She shook her head,"Craziness is all it is."

         "Just sit back and relax. You are not in your right mind."

   He started the car and drove off slowly.Carly drifted in and out of sleep.Her mind was working slowly. Several minutes into the drive back home,she turned to her brother.

        "Carl?"

          "Yeah?"

         "I think I'm bi," she stated.

          "Are you sure?" It was not what she had expected to hear from him after she admitted that but she nodded anyway.

        "As sure as when I knew I was attracted to girls when I met Dylan. Worst thing is that,I think I slightly felt that for a guy when I was holding on to Dylan, dancing during prom night."

        "Did you tell her that? Is that why it was so bad?"

       "She doesn't know that. How could I possibly tell her.Maybe if what happened with the guy hadn't happened I would have. But telling her that would break her even more."

        "It would have been better to tell her the truth."

       "Not this truth Carl.Pretending like everything was okay between us began to become too much. I don't know if she will ever see  it but I did it to set her free.I feel like she loves me more than I love her and it is not fair to her."

        Carl didn't comment about it.They drove on silently for the rest of the way and snuck back into the house without alerting anyone. They were lucky that day.

     They indeed came to believe that the next day when their parents woke them up.Carly of course had a terrible headache but Carl helped to conceal any hint of having spent the night getting drunk. The other kids they had been with had been arrested and their parents informed. That's how the news got around. Call it good luck or whatever. They looked at each other and a promise was made through their eyes. They would always look out for each other and it was like that through out all college.

                    ★★★

      Present day...

   It was the Sunday that Carly was supposed to fly back to America. She stood at the waiting bay at the airport with her two friends,her laggage by her sides.Teddy and Allie were just a few paces away talking excitedly for the last day.After spending Friday night with them,the next day was spent doing last minute preparations and now here they were,about to leave the country that had been their home for the last seven years and going back to the one that had been her home all her earlier life before that.

         "So this is it," she stated with a sigh.

         "Yeah.Time to head back home."

          "I'm still not sure I'm ready for it.It's just that I can't cancel. Teddy would be devastated."

   They all turned to where Teddy was.

        "Maybe not," Ella said."He seems quite at home around Allie."

       "You'll keep in touch,right?"

        "Definitely, I'll miss you both so much. Thanks for listening to me blubber about all my stupid decisions."

         "What I have gathered from all that is that what you had with Dylan was the cutest and realest relationship. It wasn't stupid or premature as you thought. I think if you find her single and waiting, you should make things right with her,and hold on this time. You still love her,there's no doubting that," Carol said.

         "I know that but I don't think she will be waiting for anyone or anything. The way she was back in highschool with every guy jealous of her looks and charm,afraid that she would steal their girlfriends, I'm now imagining the hotter and older version of her.Some girl probably has her under her claws."

            "How would that situation make you feel?" This time it was Ella.

         "Maybe regret,probably jealous but I'd be happy for her if she found someone worthy of her love." And all her answers were true. The others nodded at the same time. "We have to go now.Take care and I wish you nothing but happiness. Please stay in love."

     Carol nodded a turned to Ella,"Always."

           "And forever," Ella replied looking at her lover. "I hope you find that happiness too Carly.Whether it will be with Dylan or not,I wish you the very best."

          "I still stan you and Dylan. I don't know her but from the way you have described her,she must be something."

    Carly laughed, "Thank you guys.I'll keep in touch."

          "You better,or we will come to hunt you down in Los Angeles," Carol teased.

         "Well I wouldn't mind a surprise visit."

        "We could take a vacation there," Ella suggested. "What do you think love?"

   Carol nodded, "We'll definitely consider that."

    After bidding her friends goodbye for the millionth time, Carly summoned her son and headed to the luggage section then later to departure.After their passports and tickets had been checked, she turned around and gave the place one last look.Teddy tugged on her arm impatiently and she smiled at him.

       "Ready?" she asked him.

           "Yes!" he replied excitedly. "I can't wait to get there."

 She smiled at him knowingly, "Relax baby,it's gonna be a while."

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