Chapter 10: Resolve

"Courage to me is doing something daring, no matter how afraid, insecure, intimidated, alone, unworthy, incapable, ridiculed, or whatever other paralyzing emotion you might feel. Courage is taking action....no matter what. So you're afraid? Be afraid. Be scared silly to the point you're trembling and nauseous, but do it anyway!" —Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway: Quotes, Verse, and Grumblings for Every Day of the Year

"A human being always acts and feels and performs in accordance with what he imagines to be true about himself and his environment...Imagination sets the goal 'picture' which our automatic mechanism works on. We act, or fail to act, not because of 'will,' as is so commonly believed, but because of imagination." —Maxwell Maltz, The New Psycho-Cybernetics: The Original Science of Self-Improvement and Success That Has Changed the Lives of 30 Million People

"A crisis creates the opportunity to dip deep into the reservoirs of our very being, to rise to levels of confidence, strength, and resolve that otherwise we didn't think we possessed." —Jon M. Huntsman Sr., Winners Never Cheat: Even in Difficult Times

***

Eventually, Arlan was able to finish his story, even though it sounded so horrifying and traumatizing for someone his age. He did not actually witness it happen but the state of the woman the killer left behind was so horrendously massacred Arlan threw up right there and then.

An hour has passed and Arlan's parents were already calling for the two of them to come down for dinner.

"Dinner is ready! Hurry up. Soup doesn't taste good when they are cold!"

Around the table, five of them were sitting and facing each other with a plate for each of them right in front of everyone. The rice and the beef stock, which was turned into soup with different spices and vegetables to add flavor to it, was enough for the five of them to enjoy.

Shyly, Xenia waited for the others to get their share of rice in a large bowl. He was the last person to put some rice on his plate while the others began to serve themselves the soup and scooped up chunks of beef into a bowl.

"Why is Xenia being so quiet?" Asked Arlan's father, who just had a tablespoon of the soup. "Whoo! This tastes great!"

"Uh, I'm just feeling bad," he answered.

"Oh, I get it! It's because you're sitting here about to eat something delicious while your family is at your house—"

"Dear," Arlan's mother interrupted. "Pleno, after we're done eating. I want you to pack the leftovers for Xenia to bring home."

Thaniel is Arlan's brother's first name. They call him Pleno for some reason.

"T-that's!"

Xenia genuinely felt embarrassed. He knew they were treating him so well that it actually makes him feel bad. Something deep inside of him tells him that he does not deserve their kindness.

"Being shy and embarrassed to speak up won't get you anywhere," he thought to himself. "Moreover, pride won't save you from hunger or your problems. Lowering one's pride, sometimes, is the best answer. Even if you feel low."

"Your parents and we are friends. Helping a friend in need is not bad when you can actually lend a helping hand."

Gratefully, Xenia accepted their kindness and thanked all of them with teary eyes. All of his emotions inside were real, even though he would occasionally lie about what he felt.

All five of them shared and enjoyed their dinner while sharing some stories about their lives and trivial matters. They avoided talking about the recent murders on the island, for they all know it would ruin the great evening.

"I will help with the dishes."

Arlan and Xenia joined together to wash the used utensils and dishes while Pleno did what he was told to do. The two adults went back to finishing their jobs and saw Xenia off with the soup and rice in a large container.

"Do you really not want Arlan and Pleno to walk you home?"

"I'll be fine. Thank you for everything! Arlan, see you tomorrow!"

While waving his hand as his silhouette slowly disappeared in the night, Xenia smilingly bid farewell to the four of them. He was so happy because of the food he got from Arlan's family.

"They gave me enough for my siblings and my parents. What a wonderful and kind family. May they always be protected from danger!"

Without any source of light but the moon shining above him, Xenia bravely tread on the darkness, skipping on the dusty road ahead of him. By skipping, Xenia was saving himself much more time, and while it does not require that much energy, it would not tire him out immediately.

"It's cold! I should have brought my coat!"

A chilly breeze swept by, and cricketing insects killed off the silence around, wherein uneasiness began to loom over. Xenia could not help overthinking right now because of what Arlan told him.

"A kid? A midget? Which one is it?"

Whistling helps him overcome the uneasiness inside of him. By doing so, the feeling welling up in his heart will gradually subside, and the sound it causes keeps his mind occupied.

Xenia was halfway there. It would only take him four minutes if he continues at the same pace. Whistling really does help him focus through the dread and uncertainty.

Caw, caw, caw! Even if Xenia could not see the ravens, he knew it was Bandit and Mischief following him from above.

"Caw, caw, caw!"

Strangely, the pair of ravens seemed to be saying something Xenia could not comprehend because he was not a raven. He stopped, and the ravens quickly landed on both of his shoulders. They never did that before, and for them to do so after appearing out of nowhere, Xenia sensed the danger creeping from the ground.

"Shh! I'm trying to listen to my surroundings."

Faint rustling. Xenia did not catch on to this. He closed his eyes to improve his keen senses. Silently, the kid let his sensory receptors listen to the faint steps circling around him.

"I could hear a few rattling noises. Pinpointing the location of the thing making these faint movements will take some time."

Xenia knew what he had to do.

"Bandit and Mischief, if the two of you could understand me. I want both of you to fly above me and utter a caw when you see someone approaching me."

Like they could actually understand Xenia, the pair of ravens took off and did what they were told to. Not feeling the grappling feet of both the ravens on his shoulders makes focusing easier than when the ravens were on his shoulders.

Bandit's and Mischief's caws will signal to Xenia that someone is approaching him. He does not recall the ravens being nocturnal creatures at all. They might be having a hard time observing the surroundings, but Xenia trusts the pair of ravens.

"This way! I saw someone run this way!"

Voices from a bunch of people came into earshot. Xenia turned his head to his side and saw a bunch of lamps being held by the townspeople.

They were getting closer and closer. From the looks of it and based on their words, the townspeople were chasing after someone.

"If only our family did not have a bad reputation, I would have

approached them. But they might even think of me as the psychotic maniac if I suddenly came out of nowhere for guidance."

Xenia chose to stay hidden in the dark path toward home. Bushes and thick trunks could pose as his hiding spot. For them not to notice his presence, Xenia completely erased his standpoint.

Inside a hole under a tree where its thick roots were visible, Xenia found shelter in it. He felt safe sitting in there with his feet curled, hugging the container given to him by Arlan's parents.

"Shit, shit, shit! They are gonna find me!"

Another familiar voice spoke. It was relatively low, but Xenia knew that the person was just near him.

Slowly, courage pushed him to crouch and look out for the person. His heart was pounding from the thought of being caught, but Xenia keenly searched around and found the person that spoke.

"Isn't that Ergas? What is he doing outside here? Is it him they are chasing?"

"I think I saw him there!"

"Fuck!"

"Er—"

Words did not come out of his mouth. It was his own mind that stopped him from getting involved. He wanted to call Ergas and hide him where he was, but he could not do so. Xenia knew what the consequence would be. Therefore, he shut his mouth and watched his friend run for his life and the townspeople persistently in raging pursuit.

"There he is! Catch that bastard!"

Ergas ran as fast as he could, going full throttle under the night towards the dreadful rocky path of nothing but danger.

Xenia, on the other hand, was contemplating his decisions. His conscience was killing him for not saving a friend in need. But he was unaware that even his safety was about to disappear through the night.

"Hey, I found someone hiding under this tree!"

A lamp shone upon his face, and Xenia was forced to make a decision.

"I need to think of a way out!"

~