Chapter-2 Regarding Happiness

If I Had To Give my mood a color as I donned my indoor shoes at the

elementary school lockers, it would be grey. Mostly because of all the

unpleasant people I'd run into that morning. At times like these, you'd

usually say that you were feeling blue, but I liked the color blue.

"Oh man, the weirdo's here!" a voice I did not recognize called from

inside.

I gave a theatrical sigh. "You all really must be stupid if you can't beat

a weirdo like me on tests. How fascinating."

Gratified by the looks of anger on the faces of several of my idiot

classmates, I refused to converse with them further. Eventually one of them

said something like: "Why're you such a baby?"

I wanted to praise them for being able to even speak intelligibly, but

they left, and so I put on my indoor shoes and went into the building.

Just then…

"Morning, Koyanagi-san."

A single voice put a halt to my grey-colored shuffling. I turned around

to see one of my classmates, and my expression turned dark.

"Oh! Morning, Ogiwara-kun."

"I just finished reading Tom Sawyer yesterday," he said. "It was really

good."

"Did you? That's great. Which scenes did you like?"

"The part about the paint, I guess. I thought Tom was really cool, too."

"Tom really is appealing. And smart."

"I liked Huck, too."

"Homeless Huck, right? Oh, come to think of it, I'm—"

I stopped. Not because I was trying to keep my talk with Granny to

myself, but because a boy came running up from behind Ogiwara-kun and

crashed into him. I turned my back on the startled Ogiwara, but I doubt he even saw it. The boy who had run into him was a close friend, and had most

certainly run into Ogiwara in the name of boyish roughhousing, not bullying.

No one would bully Ogiwara-kun, nor would he bully anyone. He had a lot of

friends.

I, on the other hand, had no friends in our class and elected to turn my

back on this. Other than Ogiwara, everyone else in our class either thought I

was clumsy or hated me. Still, I had never once been bullied by them. And

so, I decided to make my exit first, upon noticing Ogiwara's friend. A

friendship between boys isn't something a girl should get in the middle of.

I needed to stop at the library before I could head to the classroom. The

library opened first thing in the morning, which was wonderful for me. I

much preferred to spend the raucous period before Hitomi-sensei arrived in

the quiet library.

When I entered, I was greeted by the unique smell of the books and the

kind librarian. I asked the librarian if they had The Adventures of Huckleberry

Finn, which I'd heard about from Granny the day before. The librarian

guided me to a bookshelf and left me to seek out the book myself.

"If you're a lover of books, you'll want to enjoy the heart-pounding

feeling of searching for them," she said.

I felt the same way.

I quickly found the book in question and picked it up, my fingertips

tingling with excitement. I dropped my bag and took a nearby seat.

I'm sure that Ogiwara-kun and I were the only ones in our class who

understood the incomparable feeling of opening the first page of a book. It

would be wasted on the others.

All alone, I took the first tiny step into the tale of Homeless Huck.

The library was a wonderful place, with its quiet, its lovely smell, and

the kind librarian. However, even here, there was one line that one must not

cross: losing oneself too deeply in the world of books.

Until the librarian called out, I'd completely forgotten that I was still at

school. Just before the morning bell rang, the librarian called my name and,

after what seemed like ages, I returned to my own world. I borrowed the

book, stuffed it into my bag, and bid farewell for now.

I passed through the hallways, noisier now than when I arrived, and

climbed the stairs one by one to my third-floor classroom. Ignoring the boys

who ran through the hallways, I stepped inside. No one seemed to take notice

of me entering the room. As always, I marched straight to my seat in the very

last row. I put down my backpack and sat down.

Kiriyuu-kun, who sat beside me, noticed me and hurriedly shut the

notebook on his lap.

"Good morning, Kiriyuu-kun."

"G-good-good morning, Koyanagi-san."

He was talking quickly, the way he did when he was upset at being

teased. He shoved the closed notebook into his desk.

"What were you drawing?"

"N-nothing!"

He was lying. I always knew when Kiriyuu-kun was lying. He had

been drawing a picture. He was always doodling in his notebook. He perhaps

thought that he was doing a good job of hiding it, but I was his neighbor—I

saw everything.

He was really skilled at drawing, something that I thought he ought to

be crowing about to the people around him, but he never did, and the idiot

boys ridiculed him again and again for it.

"Kiriyuu-kun, life is like a cavity."

"Wh-what do you mean?"

"If you don't like it, you should hurry up and do something about it. If

people are making fun of you for drawing, then you should just spit it back in

their faces," I said, putting my backpack onto the shelf behind me and taking

my seat once more.

"I-I can't do that," Kiriyuu said quietly, not looking my way.

"Not with that weak attitude you can't," I said, just as the bell rang.

Hitomi-sensei entered the classroom. Everyone loved Hitomi-sensei—

the only time the atmosphere seemed clear and bright was when she was

there.

"Good morning!"

"Goood mooorniiing!"

At the direction of Ogiwara, the class representative, we began another

boring day of school.

First period was math, second was social studies, and then in third

period we had the lesson about happiness that Hitomi-sensei had mentioned

to me. I wanted to proudly announce that I'd known about it since yesterday,

but I had been sworn to secrecy. I mentioned neither the lesson nor the

chocolate.

The fifty-minute class passed quickly, reading the story in our textbook

and thinking about the main character's feelings. There was no time to think

about happiness. Then Hitomi-sensei announced that fourth period would be

an extension of the third. I very much approved of this idea, and thought that

fifty minutes was not nearly enough.

In fourth period, we had to come up with various notions of happiness.

We were split into pairs, and had to exchange what we thought of as our own

happiness.

I was paired with my neighbor, Kiriyuu-kun. Kiriyuu was rarely one to

talk unprompted, so I had to lead the conversation.

"Yesterday, I was eating a cookie with ice cream on top. I felt happy

then."

"Huh."

"Did you have anything like that?"

"Well, umm, the ohagi that my grandma made were really good."

"Sweets that grandmas make are always super tasty!"

"Yeah. I like the ones my mom makes too, though. They're different

from Grandma's."

"Your mom makes sweets too? That's nice. My mom doesn't get home

until nighttime."

The two of us continued discussing like this, jotting things down in our

notebooks. We were on task, and when Hitomi-sensei made the rounds to

check in she gave us praise, but there was one thing that still bothered me. No matter how much we discussed the topic, even when I mentioned books,

Kiriyuu-kun never said anything about drawing. I thought this was strange, so

I asked.

"Aren't you happy when you're drawing?"

"Uh, m-maybe? I…do like it."

"Then that's one thing that makes you happy."

"B-but whenever I d-draw…people make fun of me…"

"That doesn't matter!"

My voice was louder than I intended. Kiriyuu-kun seemed shocked, but

so did everyone else in the room. I was surprised at myself, too.

"Sorry, I just got excited!" I told Hitomi-sensei, who was looking my

way.

"Try not to startle everyone," she replied gently, and although everyone

was muttering, calm returned.

I turned back to Kiriyuu. "Stuff like that doesn't matter."

I jotted down "drawing wonderful pictures" on my page. Kiriyuu-kun

hung his head, silent.

As fourth period ended and lunch subsequently wrapped up, I spent the

rest of my midday break in the library. It was noisier now than it was in the

morning, but it was still quieter than the classroom, and I was able to bury

myself in the adventures of Homeless Huck.

After break was clean-up time, so when the bell rang, I returned to the

classroom and grabbed a broom. Kiriyuu-kun, being in the same group, had

also returned ahead of time to start cleaning.

As we diligently cleaned the room, that idiot boy from before returned

from the gymnasium, spouting some stupid nonsense.

"You two are super creepy, always drawin' your pictures and readin'

all those books."

"The only creepy thing here is your face," I replied dutifully. "Did you

know that?"

I flashed a look at Kiriyuu to see if he would reply as well, but naturally he did not.

Fifth and sixth period ended. As it came time for afternoon

announcements, I let out a sigh of relief, releasing all the anticipation I had

been holding in. We gave our farewells to Hitomi-sensei, and then it was

over…or so I thought. But there was still one important announcement for us.

"The week after next we'll be having a class visit. All of your mothers

and fathers have already been informed about this, but this will be an

important chance for them to see what you're normally like at school, so

make sure you give them handout I'm passing around, okay? Please promise

me that, everyone."

"Yes, ma'am," we chorused, passing the handouts back from the front

row.

I read the contents of the sheet, then happily slipped it into my bag. I

loved these observation days. It was a chance for my mother and father to see

just how clever I was.

Without being called to stay behind today, I went home alone as I

usually did. I put my backpack in my room as always, and started to head

back out when I remembered something important. I returned to my room

and pulled out the handout, placing it on the living room table before I set out

again.

Outside the building, as always, my bob-tailed friend was waiting for

me.

"Meow!" she cried in greeting.

We both set out towards the great rolling river. As we climbed the

bank, a breeze blew pleasantly through my hair and rippled across her short

tail. Feeling wonderful, we both began to sing. Before long, our voices still

ringing, we arrived at the cream-colored apartment building, where we stood

at the usual door and rang the bell. The first time, we heard nothing. The door

did not open the second time, either. Miss Bobtail mewled at my feet as I

rang a third time, but no reply came.

"I guess she must be out today."

"Meow."

Skank-san was a busy woman, so she was frequently out of the house. Letting the wind wash away our disappointment, we gave up and decided to

return by a different path. Obviously, we weren't going home yet. We had a

usual appointment after Skank-san's place.

We walked along while singing, passing between houses both big and

small. Soon we passed by the building where I lived, before heading along

the usual path to the hills that rose behind it. I greeted the locals we passed

along the way, but my standoffish friend merely waved her tail back and

forth, coolly averting her gaze.

"Never mind just humans," I said. "You're going to end up despised in

the world of cats that way."

She continued to walk ahead of me, as though she had not heard me,

arriving at the foot of the hill and steadily beginning the climb through the

trees. Finally we reached the usual clearing, with its house made of wood,

and rushed to knock on the door.

The first time we knocked, there was no response.

We knocked several more times, tried the knob, and circled the house's

perimeter, but it seemed that Granny was not home. I sat down in the

greenery of that empty space and crossed my short arms.

"It's weird for both Skank-san and Granny to be out."

"Meow meow," Miss Bobtail replied, forlorn that she had yet to

receive a meal.

"Now you can't just sulk about it. Life is like a school lunch."

"Meow."

"You've still got to enjoy it as much as you can, even when they don't

have the things you like. You get it?"

She did not appear to get it, but we descended the hill together anyway.

Maybe we will run into Granny on her return, I thought, but we arrived at the

park at the bottom of the hill without any such luck. In the park, children

younger than me were running around, their mothers watching over them.

Now then, what could be going on? I wondered. Miss Bobtail rolled

around at my feet, perhaps distraught that all her hopes had been betrayed.

I set the gears of my sharp mind turning. Then I remembered something.

"There's a fork in the road on the way to Granny's house."

"Meow."

"Now that I think about it, there's still a way we haven't gone. Let's try

going that way."

Miss Bobtail was still flopped on her side on the ground. I nudged her

with my toe. She stood somewhat reluctantly, let out a big yawn, and we

began climbing the hill again.

I followed behind her, sweat dotting my forehead. Finally, we arrived

at the fork. We always went right from here but today, for the first time, I

decided to try left. This path sprawled to a gentle rise. Perhaps pepped up by

the chance for some exercise, Miss Bobtail sprang along ahead of me. Cats

are such easygoing creatures.

Five minutes later, with the smell of the trees growing stronger bit by

bit, the broken iron gate appeared. The gate, which appeared as if by magic,

was open just a few centimeters.

As I reached out to touch it, the gate swung slowly open, crying out in

a hoarse voice. I hesitated for just a moment, but I looked Miss Bobtail in the

eye, thinking how far we had already come, and decided to proceed. I already

had plenty of practice looking up and sticking out my tongue for forgiveness,

just in case anyone got mad at us.

Beyond the gate were clean-cut stone steps, unlike the rough path we

had climbed. We went up carefully, but eventually the stairs ran out and

opened up into something like a clearing, strewn with gravel.

I was surprised to see it, and drank in a breath of this new air. I have no

idea whether the little one at my feet was surprised as well.

"Meow," she said, as she always did.

"I had no idea there was something like this up here."

At the end of the path opposite from Granny's house was something

that was the complete opposite: a building that looked like a square stone

box. Looking at the window-like holes along the walls, I thought the building

had two stories, but I didn't have the slightest clue what it was. There were

no patterns or lettering anywhere. It looked very much just like a plain stone box. It had none of the warmth of Granny's big wooden house.

As I drew closer, I found there wasn't even a door in the place where

the entrance should have been. Puzzling over this for a moment, I slipped

timidly in through one of the gaping holes. Miss Bobtail swallowed her

nerves and casually entered the building. I entered behind her. Don't tell

anyone, but I was actually a bit afraid.

First we looked around the ground level, but there were nothing

resembling rooms. The floor was a solid plane, utterly empty. There was not

the slightest hint that anyone might be there. The only thing even marking

this box as a building was the staircase that sat smack in the middle. With

nowhere else to go, we mustered our courage and slowly climbed the stairs.

The second floor was empty as well. It appeared as though the square

holes really had been windows once, as there were shards of glass still

hanging from them here and there. Obviously, I did not touch them—that

would be dangerous.

Ah, nothing left in this building, I thought, looking around the second

floor.

Don't tell anyone, but it really was frightening. I wanted nothing more

than to hurry back outside. But then we discovered another set of stairs,

leading up. Looking up, I could tell it led to the roof, seeing the open sky

above. I locked eyes with the little one at my feet and we decided to climb.

Step by step we climbed the stairs, leaving footprints behind in the

dust. When we poked our heads out onto the rooftop, I was greeted first by

rays of sun, and the wind brushing my face. And then I locked eyes with a

young woman sitting huddled on the ground with a box cutter pressed to her

wrist.

That day, shocked to my core, I understood for the first time what

people meant when they say that time stopped. And then, an instant later,

time was racing.

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!"

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh!!!"

"Meow!"

And that was how I met Minami-san.