Just friends

Most of the students were hanging out in the school premises. Asher watched as Cara exchanged greetings with some of them.

"You know, you can just order meals from the kitchen," Cara said as they walked. "Students in the condos are allowed meal deliveries."

"Why? Because they have the money to pay for an expensive student condo?"

"Well... That is one. The other is the fact that most of them grew up used to being attended to. It's just to reduce the way they miss home."

Asher scoffed. "That's insane," he murmured loud enough for her to hear. "I would rather walk to the cafeteria every day."

"You are kind of different from the other rich kids I know."

"Why do you guys keep calling me a rich kid? It's not like it's written on my forehead. Everyone in this institution is rich because I know expensive their fees are."

"Most of the students here are on scholarship. A lot of them. My boyfriend is also part of that group. Don't think everyone here has millions flowing in their lineage."

For a moment, Asher stopped to think. If what Cara said was true, then he might have thought wrong. He thought he was in an environment where a majority of the people were rich and pompous.

"It is a very beautiful place," he said, deciding to change the topic. "I love how the buildings are set."

"Oh, you will love it even more when you see the neighborhood. It's so beautiful and quiet here. That's why most students love the institution."

Asher knew they had gotten to the cafeteria the moment a tantalizing aroma wafted past his nostrils.

He wasn't surprised to see the place buzzing with activities: servers, and discussing students sitting in groups.

"Come on, let's go there," Cara said, linking their fingers into each other to prevent him from escaping.

Asher would have turned back or maybe run to the exit after seeing the person at the table they were approaching, but Cara's grip on his fingers did not give him the chance to do that. Just as it'd been since he set eyes on Beau, his heartbeat increased. Some parts of Beau's wet hair were plastered to the side of his head. His lips moved slowly, munching on his food and discussing with a guy beside him. Because of how crowded and a little hot the cafeteria was, the top of Beau's shirt was not buttoned. Asher tried his best to force his eyes away from the expanse of Beau's bare chest and flesh. The more he fought himself to be decent in thoughts, the more they approached Beau's table.

And Cara led him straight to the tempter.

Their eyes met. Asher felt his heart soar when Beau smiled softly.

"Asher, this is Jay." Cara pointed to her boyfriend. "He is my boyfriend. And that is Beau, the student ambassador of Elite High. He is Jay's roommate and a very nice guy."

"Nice to meet you guys. I am Asher." After a moment, he extended his hand. Jay went first. When it got to Beau's turn, Asher lagged a little. Just an eye contact and he felt his body heat up. He couldn't blame himself. He had never been with a man before and it seemed his body was fed up with his intentional denial. A kind of silence no one could define descended on the table.

Jay jumped in to save the day. "Hey Asher, take a seat. How are you settling in?"

"Very fine." Asher took his seat beside Beau—it was the only space available. "It's so beautiful here." He forced his gaze to Jay's glasses and dark hair. "I will resume lectures tomorrow."

"Yes, you should. Though I am curious why you resumed now when the semester is almost over?"

"Jay." Cara threw him a warning look.

"Nah, it's okay," Asher said, waving his hand to show how inconsequential he found Jay's nosiness. "My father wanted me to resume yesterday, so I did. I believe he wants me to settle in and understand the system before the next semester." After he finished, he allowed the excuse to sink in.

"Yes, that's so wise of him," Cara mused. "You would have known your way around the school and even made friends before the next semester. It will make your journey easier. Or what do you think Beau?"

"Huh, me?" Beau looked up and pointed a finger to his chest, his eyes slightly opened. "Oh... yes, that sounds like a really nice plan."

Eye contact was made. Silent messages were passed.

"I need to quickly run over some assignments," Jay said and got up. The way Cara also pushed her chair back and shot up told Beau that he was being framed.

"I need to also run through some assignments," she said. "See you guys later!"

Like the speed of light, Jay and his girlfriend ran out of the cafeteria.

Asher prayed for the earth to swallow him or for something more drastic to happen, but none of such occurred. He sat beside Beau, eyes focused on the plate before them.

"Hi," Beau said in a bid to start a conversation. He cleared his throat noisily. "Were you able to get some rest?"

"I did. Thank you." Asher forced himself to dig into one of the plates. He was well aware of Beau's gaze occasionally settling his way, and it made him heat up.

"I told you the cooks here are first class. How do you see the food?"

"Splendid. Very delicious." Asher stuffed more food into his mouth just to keep himself busy. "It tastes really great," he said, still chewing.

"I told you," Beau grinned. He stole another glance at Asher. "Errm... Do you have any plans for tonight? I mean, after eating?"

For a moment, Asher lost his ability to chew. His jaws paused to allow his brain the ability to process the question. "No. No, nothing. Why do you ask?"

"I wanted us to take a walk. This place seems noisy. I can barely hear you."

"Ooh, sure."

Asher spent the remaining part of his dinner feeling butterflies playing in his guts. He had never felt the urge to push someone far away and bring that person close at the same time. In his conflicting thoughts, he didn't realize when his food was finished.

And just like that, Beau led him out of the cafeteria, directing him to the center of the fenced premises.

"I thought you were just kidding."

"About what?"

Beau spared Asher a smiling glance. "Coming to the cafeteria. You seemed so relaxed."

"I am not a hermit. Why shouldn't I be relaxed around people?" Asher looked up when he heard Beau chuckle. Some lamps in the premises gave a faint reflection of Beau's features. "I am not a spoilt rich brat. You should know that by now."

"I sure do. I do." They got to the middle of the compound. Beau was the first to look at the sky. The moon was just coming out, and there were very few stars scattered all over the sky. Asher followed his eyes. Together, they stood, gazing at the sky, monitoring the slow emergence of the moon.

"Ash?"

"Hmm?"

"Which do you prefer I call you? Ash or Asher?"

"Any of them. You can call me whichever makes you comfortable."

Beau's voice dropped to a murmur. "I love both," he said. "I guess I will switch between them every now and then."

His words forced a smile from Asher. "I am okay with that."

"Do you want us to look for a comfortable place to sit?"

"Nah, I'm fine this way." Asher couldn't see any comfortable spot that would give them a clear view of the moon, and that was the main reason he declined the offer to look for somewhere to sit. "Do you want to sit?"

"No. I am okay this way."

"Hmm." Asher looked up again. He summoned up courage and spilled out what had been on his mind. "Beau... I am so sorry for this afternoon. I freaked out... I snapped, and that—"

"No, no, no! Asher, stop. I should be the one apologizing." Beau came to stand before him, his fingers pointing to his own chest. "I shouldn't have pushed you far like that. You wanted a kiss and I was so stupid to think of something more. I am sorry."

"Is that how you see it?" Asher asked in surprise.

"I have been itching to apologize. I couldn't come up with the courage to do so. I am so sorry."

"I should be the one apologizing," Asher said, voice now low. "I shouldn't have pushed you out like that. I am sorry."

"Well, I guess we are both sorry and we have realized our mistakes. Can we start afresh? From the beginning?"

From the beginning? Asher couldn't explain the feeling of happiness that washed over him. Beau was acting very mature and Asher appreciated it. Asher wanted them to start on a fresh page, a page where there wouldn't be any form of physical or sexual attraction, a page where they never kissed.

"Yes, we should start from the beginning," Asher said softly. "And I am also sorry for kissing you."

Like it or not, that stung. Beau's heart collapsed. A painful feeling of guilt and sadness assailed him, and made him weak. His knees shook, making him wish he had insisted they found somewhere to sit. The look on Asher's face made it seem like their kiss was a mistake, or was something forbidden.

"You should not be sorry for things like that," Beau said softly, hiding the hurt from reflecting in his voice. "It's not like I am complaining."

"Well, I am." Asher steeled himself. He knew he was probably going to regret it later but he just had to push it out, lay out how he felt. "It was a mistake, a lustful attraction that I sincerely regret." When Beau's lips parted but no words came out, Asher's heart softened. But he didn't stop, "I know what we did then, and I want us to set things right. We can be... friends."

"Yeah... FRIENDS." Beau slowly extended his arm for a handshake. He kept his eyes fixed on Asher's. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No. This isn't about you. Can we just forget about that?"

"Yeah. No problem. Let us forget about that."

Beau's voice revealed all the hurt he was hiding inside. Asher felt like reaching forward to cup his cheeks or rub his head, soothe him, take away all the pain.

"I... I should go to bed now." Asher took some steps back. "I need enough rest since I will start lectures tomorrow."

"Yes, you should rest. I will be at your condo first thing in the morning during my early dorms and room check."

"No, don't do that. I will wake up on time, you don't have to worry about that."

Beau took some steps back. "See you in the morning." He stood still, unmoving, as Asher walked away. In all his life, Beau had never felt such a rush of emotions. He couldn't find a reason for the rejection he got from Asher and it was driving him crazy. Funny how someone he hardly knew could make him feel that way. Even before he started for his dorm, he knew that his entire night would be miserable.