"...I want to kiss you..."

He screamed but no sound came out. It seemed to be going back into his throat. That was when he noticed the strong fist clamped over his mouth.

"Asher, don't scream!"

Huh?

Asher relaxed immediately. "Beau?" he called out, his voice coming out muffled because of the palm over his mouth.

"Please, don't scream." Beau slowly let him go. "Are you okay?" He looked at Asher who had gotten white from fear. Beau could clearly see the print of his hand around Asher's mouth.

"I am fine." Asher exhaled in relief. "What are you doing here?"

"I told you that I would come over this morning. I wanted you to rest enough, else I would have been here as early as five."

"But I said there wouldn't be a need for that. I get up pretty early." That was the moment Asher noticed what Beau wore. The first two things that captured Asher's attention were Beau's lashes and brows. They were so dark and full—just like his eyes. Beau looked very smart in a T-shirt and blue Jeans. The upper buttons on the shirt were loose, revealing a beautiful expanse of chest flesh.

"I just had to make sure. Sorry if I scared you."

"No, it's okay. I should have locked the door."

"I guess you now know why I insisted you lock the door whenever you go out, don't you?"

"I definitely do now. For a moment, I thought I was about to be kidnapped."

Beau chuckled. "No one can kidnap you and pass you through the security at the gate," he assured humorously. "To prevent your stuff from being stolen, make sure your door is always locked when you are out. Understood?"

"Yes sir." Asher did a mock salute. His spirits elevated when Beau chuckled. The more he tried to push away from Beau, the more he found himself closer to him. "Well, I guess I better lock the door and go to the chancellor now."

"He sent for you?"

"Nah, I want to get the list of courses I am to offer."

"The chancellor is in a meeting now. You won't see him. This morning, we have a general course for all departments."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Come on, I will take you there. Pick one of your notes."

And once again, Asher found himself waking with Beau. At first, they walked in silence. As they got into the busy corridors, Asher unconsciously moved close to Beau. The crowd was simply too much!

"Are you scared?" Beau asked the question at the same time their fingers weaved into each other. He held Asher's hand like a piece of fragile equipment.

"No. It just seems intimidating."

"You will get used to it."

"HEY, GUYS!"

Asher and Beau turned back at the same time to see Jay and Cara running up to them.

"Hey Asher!" Cara grinned when they caught up. Asher greeted her, all smiles and laughter. Jay came next. After exchanging pleasantries, they bounced to class together.

All the way, Jay threw Beau confused glances, occasionally gesturing to their linked hands. Beau shrugged in response.

Asher clung to Beau like a flea. It didn't come as a surprise to him that he found Beau a protector, after all, what were all the muscles for?

At once, Asher found an answer.

The muscles were for enticement, for gripping a poor body, holding it in place while an erect rod pounded into a crevice. Asher imagined the muscles holding him, Beau's body a cage over his on the bed.

Asher's hand involuntarily tightened on Beau's as he imagined the ambassador over him, dick pounding into him from behind, their sweat-glistened skin banging again each other, emotions, fleshy desires raw and throbbing...

"Are you feeling hot?"

"Hmm?" Asher glanced to the right where Beau stood looking at him with a worried expression. Slowly, his brain brought the question back. "Ooh, no. I am fine."

"You feel hot." It almost sounded like an accusation.

"I am fine," Asher repeated.

"Your face looked flushed." It was a perfect picture for Beau. He had never seen Asher with any form of color. The blush on his face had Beau thinking about what must have been going through his mind. Beau led him into a class that was slowly getting filled. Their hands were still linked.

Asher wanted his arm back, but he didn't have the will strong enough to do that. How would he explain to Beau that their contact was heating him? In a world so cold and lonely, how was he supposed to tell the hunk beside him that he didn't want their fingers to separate for all eternity?

Beau led him to a chair for two beside a window. The noisy chatter of the class subsided soon as a woman stepped in.

"She is very nice," Beau whispered to Asher who sat still beside him. "Just make sure she doesn't see you not concentrating."

"I am concentrating."

Beau leaned closer to his ear. "I know. Keep on doing that."

Good lord! Asher's body turned into a furnace. He couldn't hold in the shivers Beau's hot breath on his neck brought. He did exactly what Beau commanded: concentrate.

Once in a while, Beau's scent would filter into his nostrils, sometimes, just a whiff. Most of the time, he found himself leaning to the side to get more of the scent which kept going straight into his brain.

By the end of the class, Asher was already feeling lightheaded, somewhat intoxicated from all the erotic thoughts swarming his brain and the heat from the body beside him.

Beau did not see Jay and his girlfriend after class. He previously had plans to use his roommate as an escape tool to get away from Asher. Too much contact and whispering were making his body jump.

As the students streamed out of the class, Beau didn't move—neither did Asher. They sat still, each busy with something inconsequential just to while away time.

At last, the lecturer left. The class became pin-drop silent.

Two males were left to sit alone in silence.

Beau broke it. "Have you had something to eat?" he asked.

Asher shook his head. "No, not yet. Isn't it too early to have breakfast?"

"Really? I thought I was the only one who thought that way. Jay is one to eat very early. Such a foodie."

Asher found himself chuckling. "He seems like a very nice guy. I like him."

"He has a girlfriend." The sentence had already rolled out of Beau's mouth before he realized what he was implying. "I am talking about Cara," he said, trying to cover up the jealousy he felt when Asher said he liked Jay. "Cara is his girlfriend."

"Yeah, I know. I tend to eat early sometimes though. It depends on my mood."

"I can relate to that," Beau uttered a sound of relief when he noticed that Asher did not take note of the jealousy in his tone. "Do you want us to go to the cafeteria now?"

"Do you want to?"

"I am not hungry yet. Are you?"

Asher did not know what to say in response. The sincerity in Beau's voice and the care in his eyes made Asher speechless. He had pushed Beau away, even hurt his emotions, yet Beau never stopped caring. Asher felt his conscience pricking him.

Beau leaned closer. "Ash, are you okay?" he asked in worry.

As usual whenever he was around Beau, Asher's heartbeat increased from their proximity. "I am fine," he managed to whisper. His eyes went to Beau's lips. "Why do you care?"

"'Cause we are friends. I should care about you."

Asher had never felt hurt the way he did now. Being friend zoned by Beau hurt more than he thought it would. He could only imagine how Beau must have felt.

"Beau, I don't know what to do. I am confused." Asher trembled a little. His expression dulled. Beau scooted closer until they were inches apart.

"Asher, talk to me. What happened?" With eyes dark and dangerous, he asked, "Did someone hurt you? Molest you? I swear to heaven, I will—"

"No, it's not that."

Beau was ready to stand up and fight for him. Asher smiled softly. He couldn't look Beau straight in the eye.

"Then what is it?"

"I... I am such a mess. I can't seem to know what I want and go for it. I am always scared. Even now."

Beau gently cupped his face. Asher shivered in his hold. "It's okay to be confused or scared. I feel that way sometimes. It's okay. You are my friend, and I won't let anything happen to you."

"Can you please stop saying that?"

"Saying what?"

"Don't you understand what I have been saying?!" Asher leapt up. The tears he had been trying to keep back started falling. "I want you! I want to kiss you! I want you in my arms! I want your body against mine! Don't you understand?! I have been fighting myself over this. I want us to give ourselves a chance."

Beau's jaw dropped. His arms twitched. He felt like running forward, wrapping Asher in a bear hug after wiping his tears, and holding him close until all his emotions were released.

"Then do it," Beau whispered. "Stop pushing me away. Let's give this attraction a chance. I feel the same way about you."

"I don't know if we can."

Beau covered the gap between them. "Why do you say so?"

"Everything..." Asher did not lift his eyes from the floor. "We will never be accepted. Two men in a relationship is not something society will ever accept. My family will disown me... My dad... He will prefer to see me dead."

Beau cupped his face again. "Why do you care about society? Is this the reason you freaked out after our kiss?"

Asher nodded. The tears continued rolling down. "I was scared. I didn't want any form of attachment when I wasn't even in charge of my emotions. Look at me crying like a baby. I am such a mess."

"No, no. You are not a mess. I think you have held this burden for too long. You need this release."

"I think I need more than tears to calm me down right now." Asher tried wiping his face but more tears rolled down. "Beau?"

"Yes?"

"Are you mad at me?"

"No! Why will I be?!" Beau pulled him close from the waist. "Did you think I will be mad at you because of what happened the other time?"

"I expected you not to talk to me again."

Beau looked into Asher's eyes. Something in Asher's blue orbs tugged at his heartstrings. Beau could not explain the feeling.

"I knew something was wrong. I was just confused. I thought I hurt you unintentionally."

"I'm sorry if I made you feel that way."

"You don't have to apologize." Beau wiped the corners of his eyes. "I think I understand what is wrong now."

Asher looked up. He wove his arms around Beau's neck. Asher was well aware of the palms splayed on his waist. Their lips were inches from each other.

"Beau?"

"Yes?"

Asher looked at his lips again. "I want to kiss you."

"I also want to kiss you, Ash."