Chapter 51

"I'm sorry you weren't here for these." I pass over an envelope that has printouts from each ultrasound starting from that first dreadful appointment. 

He grabs the box and places it beside me, and with the other hand cups my chin. "Rina you have nothing to be sorry about. It's my fault I wasn't here, I can't believe I could be so stupid. I'm sorry. You shouldn't have had to be alone, and you won't be. I am here now and I'm not leaving. Unless it's with you and our babies of course." He kisses my forehead and I close my eyes. I feel the bed shift next to me. 

"Okay now show me my babies!" He pauses. "I've been so caught up in getting you back I didn't even consider, what are we having?" He looks at me and I smile. 

"I didn't want to find out yet, at least not without you." 

"Do you want to wait until we deliver or should we find out together now?" 

"I haven't decided, give me a few days." 

I point to the black and white picture in his hand of what looks like two matching gummy bears. "This is JA and this is JB. At first I thought I was just having one and was calling the baby J but then I found out it was two and had to compromise. I will never forget being in that room and the Ultrasound Tech asking me. 'Do twins run in your family?' I immediately thought 'NO!'  Of course not but then I thought back to everything you had told me. I simply replied that the father was a twin."

A few tears escape my eyes and I don't even know why I am crying again but before I can wipe them away Tae has pulled me in. "Rina, don't cry. I am here now. I am so sorry you had to do that alone. I should've been there. I am so sorry and I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you and our babies. Please don't cry." 

I continue to wipe my face on his shirt, "It's not for me, I'm crying for you."

"Don't cry for me, there is no need. I am the happiest man in the world right now. You did that for me. I can't apologize and thank you enough for keeping my babies." 

"What about your brother?" He braces my shoulders. "Have you ever heard of a redemption arc?" I nod my head. "Well this is mine, my children will love each other even more than us and they will always protect one another. I'm certain especially with you as a Mother." 

He leans in and kisses me chastely on the lips. I feel swept up in the rush, we are alone in the house, and the sweet words he just spoke to me. How can I not give myself to him again and again? 

I deepen the kiss, turning my head to the side and pressing my tongue against his lips searching for an opening. He groans, and pulls me in closer, opening his mouth in the process. I think it's for me, but quickly our tongues are tangled and I feel a heat rising deep within me. This must be what all of the pregnancy forums have been talking about. Increased blood flow and libido. I hadn't quite felt that need maybe because I was sad. It feels as though every nerve ending in my body has turned on. My body is betraying me and I'm not sure what to do. 

I feel so hot, and I am gasping for breath. Tae pulls away, obviously noticing my breath. "We shouldn't be doing this, I can wait." 

I pull in closer and bite his lip. "I can't" My panties are soaked and I feel crazed. "I need you inside me." I'm practically crawling onto him as he tries to lean back and away. My hand reaches to feel his cock that is hard and pressing into his jeans. Our tongues aren't doing anything to relieve me. I pull away, "Now." 

He looks at me, that faint peach blush on his cheeks that I love. "Is it safe?" He pauses, "for the pregnancy? For you?" I nod my head. "Are you sure?" I can see the hesitation. We obviously have never had a conversation about this. Let alone a conversation about having kids. 

I had read that some men don't like to have sex with their partner while they are pregnant. It freaks them out, they don't want to hurt the baby, it's inappropriate, they aren't attracted to a pregnant woman. Things like that, am I pushing Tae to do something he doesn't want to do? I think of my body at 7 months pregnant. My stomach is huge with stretch marks on the sides, I've gained weight, and don't have near as much mobility. Maybe this was a bad idea. 

Just as I am about to pull away, Tae responds as if he can read my mind. 

"The Doctor said it's okay for you and there isn't a risk to the babies, right?" I nod my head. He mumbles a Korean curse word I am not familiar with. "You have been turning me on since the moment I saw you. You are more beautiful than when I left, which seems impossible. The way your hips sway when you walk, the sight of you carrying my children, your…" he looks at my breasts and I blush. "I feel like it's been hard since I knocked on your door. I wasn't sure I was going to last the next few months of pregnancy and recovery without being inside you." 

I gasp, and then cover my mouth. He smiles and continues, "I thought sex was off limits to be honest. I haven't read up too much on it, as I just found out I was a Dad a few days ago. I also didn't know that you would be so fucking sexy. After these babies I am tempted to fill you up again so we can have more." His voice is low and gruff, and it's barely a whisper when he speaks. I can't believe he is saying this kind of stuff out loud. 

I'm thankful though, my center is dripping. "Take off your clothes, Rina, I want to see every single change I've missed."