Chapter 3- A Rollercoaster of Emotions

“Welcome to my home sweet home, Nagi-chan,” Karma said, opening the door to his house. His house was about two stories, and very modern. His family was rich after all. It's not like I haven’t been here a thousand times to study, watch Sonic Ninja, and sometimes even play the occasional games, but it shocks me still. I honestly don't know if I'll ever get over it.

“So you had something you wanted to tell me, Karma?” I ask him as we walk up the stairs to his bedroom.

“Something you would probably want to sit down for,” said with a small chuckle. I look at him questioning. I wonder what he means by that. It made it seem serious, but I have no idea what it could be. Karma usually isn't the serious type. Well at least he never really acts like it. He opens his door and flops on his bed. I sit down next to him and look at him, sitting the plush next to me. He looks up at me and starts talking.

“Y’know I’ve never seen Rio-chan pissed off. At least truly pissed off before; not until about a week ago,” what even does this have to do with anything? Are they mad at each other because if they are they didn't seem like it at the arcade today.

“Okay? Are you two mad at each other?” I asked, looking at him because I may be jealous of their bond, but I still care. He gave out a dry laugh.

“Honestly, I don’t think she’ll ever forgive me for this; you probably won’t either, but she said I need to tell you before I was forced to,” what in the actual world is he talking about? Don’t get me wrong I love him, but he confuses me so much sometimes. I thought about it for a few moments. I usually had a ton of ideas, but right now I have not a single one.

“Are you dating; wait but that wouldn’t make her mad,” I thought for another moment, “Oh! Did you break up? I wouldn’t be mad if you were either one. Dating or broken up,” I know it would be mean of me to hope for the latter since he is my best friend, and she is also a 'close' friend, but still, I couldn’t but at least hope for it. I feel like it's okay for me to be a little selfish sometimes. Karma started to laugh so hard he had to sit up and hold his stomach. After about five minutes of laughing at me, he finally said something. I didn't think that was, for one funny, and for two a very shocking assumption. They are joint at the hip most of the time now, so I wouldn't be shocked.

“I would never and I mean never date Rio-chan. That would be so weird because she is like my sister. Oh my gosh Nagi-chan; you always have the craziest ideas," well that was my only idea, and I would say it was a rational idea. I sighed and looked at him. He was smiling, probably from laughing at me so hard.

“If it’s not that then, what is it?” I was kind of getting impatient at this point. If he doesn’t tell me in the next five seconds I’m going to smack him. He layed back down on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

“Y’know I kind of wish it was that easy,” okay I’m fed up with him beating around the bush. Karma never does this. He hasn’t ever done that. He’s really scaring me.

“Karma just tell me you should know I won’t be mad,” I said softly as I nudged his shoulder.

“I guess it’s not just being mad, but also being worried,” worried? That’s strange. Karma is never worried. He jumped off a cliff to prove a point; without hesitation as well. I'm pretty sure I was more scared than he was during that.

“Just spit it out. Rip it off like a bandaid, then maybe you won’t be as scared,” I said smiling sweetly at him. He stopped looking at the ceiling and turned to look at me. I looked back, giving him my full attention. Whatever he has to say I am ready. I would never judge him; no matter what.

“Well you tell me Nagi-chan,” he paused and looked down for a bit before his crimson eyes met my bright blue ones, “how would you tell someone you’re dying? Especially when that someone is your best friend?” It was like the world stopped for a moment. I don’t believe this. He can’t be saying what I think he’s saying; I absolutely refuse to believe this for even a second. I wouldn't even entertain the thought.

“What the hell are you saying Karma?” I can’t tell if I’m mad, sad, scared or worried. I think, maybe, I’m all three.

“Well Nagisa I’m saying that I’m dying and I have, well would’ve had at maybe five years, but no one caught it, so I accidentally made it worse,” he gave a sad chuckle. There is no fucking way in hell this is true. He has been acting mostly fine. I didn’t even notice I was crying until I felt the hot tears fall onto my hands which were placed on my lap. I refuse this to be happening.

“Karma Akabane, this is better be a prank,” I has to be a prank.

“Man, I may be a sadistic asshole, but I do have morals somewhere. But yeah, I kind of wish it was a prank too. But no, the great Karma Akabane is dying. It’s terminal too, so there’s that,” how can aloof about it? Does he even care? I ball my hands up. My fingernails started to dig into my palms. Just how long has it been happening? How long has he just been hiding it?

“How long? Just, how long have you known?” I whisper out. I look down. I don't want to look at him right now. I don't know if I can look at him right now.

“Hmm,” he thought about it for a moment, “well at the beginning of me getting back off of suspension, so like a few months ago, I thought the bruises and hurting was from training and stuff, but it was there even if I hadn’t gone to training for days. So I figured I should maybe get it checked out. We have a family doctor, so I called him up and told him. He said it could just be growing pains; he thought the bruises were just accidents I hadn't even noticed. After that I was just like ‘oh okay I’m just being dramatic’. I pushed through it, but there was a point where I was like 'no this isn’t normal.' And so the doctor checked me over; we did a few tests then we found out it was ‘bone cancer’. My type is Osteosarcoma. Well I guess it’s Metastatic Osteosarcoma to be more specific. So that means It's going to spread, so that’s exciting. It’s most likely to spread to my lungs or other bones. We caught it pretty late too. We could try some things, but I mean there isn’t really much of a point,” he was going to start to say something, but I cut him off.

“Karma there is a point. There are people that love you and want you to stay around for as long as possible,” I engulfed him in a hug. I started to cry into his shoulder. I know the people that are sick are usually the crying ones, but it’s hard to hear the fact that the one person you love in the world is dying. He literally is my world.

“Nagi-chan, look at it from my perspective. Do you wanna spend your last days getting tests? What about the class; you think they would treat me the same? They would treat me like glass, just like Rio is. She says she isn’t, but I can tell she is. At the arcade she didn’t play one arcade game with me that would strain me in the very least. We used to make bets to see how many hoops we could shoot. She won’t even look at that game anymore,” he sighed pushing me away from him. That just made me hold on tighter.

“Nagi-chan it would be nice if you, oh I don’t know, said something,” I look at him. I could see in his eyes that he didn’t mean to sound harsh. There wasn’t anything I could say. There isn’t anything I want to say, so I did what any sane person would do and shook my ‘no’ and hid it even further into the crook of his neck. He started to cough. And I immediately moved away. He coughed for a while.

“I can get you some water or something,” if I was honest, I was panicking. I bit my lip. I didn’t know if this was a symptom or something, or he was just coughing because accidently swallowed air wrong. I hate not knowing. When he finally stopped coughing he looked at me.

“Nagisa, I still have some time. You realize that, right? Me coughing doesn’t mean I’m going to die; it just means I swallowed air wrong, so stop worrying,” he looked down at me and smiled. He is a liar. He doesn’t know how much time he has.

“Karma,” I started softly, looking up at him, “you may have time now, but for how much longer?” He looked away from me.

“I mean a few weeks, or maybe a month, probably longer, so maybe not just a few weeks; if it spreads to my lungs though, that makes it a done deal. A pretty fast deal too,” he shrugged. He shrugged like it meant nothing. I look at him in disbelief. A wave of anger flows through my veins. How could he act like he didn’t even care? I knew he wasn't afraid of death, but he has friends now. People that care. Is he really that okay with leaving us behind?

“Karma you can’t act like this is nothing! This is your life! How can you not even CARE!” I was yelling at this point, but if he didn’t care then why should? He sat up.

“Nagi-,” I cut him off. There is nothing more that he can say that will make me feel better or change at all how I feel, and for him to tell Nakamura first. What a slap in the face. I know I don't get a choice in who he tells, but I can at least be hurt by it.

“Don’t even Karma. First of all, you don’t even wanna try. You were pushing yourself at the arcade today, and for what? So you can die faster? And don’t even get me started on the fact that you told Nakamura first, not even me. I thought I was your best friend. What happened to telling each other everything? Everyone was right. Karma Akabane you are the most wretched and down right EVIL person I have ever met. You are a man who would rather betray his best friend and KILL HIMSELF SLOWLY instead of just saying you were sick, and that you shouldn’t be doing all these things. I always said that pride was one of your best qualities, it was the thing that I admired most about you. I always wished I could have that. But now I'm thankful I don't because, turns out it's going to be the thing that kills you,” with that I turned around and left. I could hear him calling my name, but I didn’t care.

I ran out of his house and slammed his front door closed. I knew I couldn't be mad at him. Or I at least shouldn’t be mad at him. He had his reasons I'm sure. It's not fair that I didn't listen. I probably should’ve heard him out, but I’m not going to, at least not right now. I wiped off the hot, angry tears that were flowing down my face. I walk to the station and get on. I don’t even want to go home right now.

~~~~~~

I got home and didn’t even say a word to my mom; it wasn’t like she tried to say anything to me either.

I don’t even know how to process this or how to handle it; I knew I shouldn’t have handled it how I did though. Or at least I shouldn’t have said those things. I've just never had to deal with something like that before. I sigh and flop onto my bed. I heard my phone ding. I assume it’s Karma, and I don’t want to talk to him. I could still look though. I pick up my phone and see it’s Nakamura. That’s strange. Like really, really strange. Maybe Karma told her, and she is texting me to ‘scold’ me. I’m not going to look at it because, curious as I am, I am not going to deal with that right now. I put my phone on the charger and set it on my nightstand. I get into the shower and try to forget everything. It didn’t work of course. I wish he would've told me when he found out. I would've tried to help him through it. After today though, I wouldn't have told me either. I can't believe I blew up like that. I don't even know what made me do it. Maybe it was fear or sadness, or anger at the world.

I got out of the shower and threw on some pajamas, and just as I was closing my eyes, my phone started to ring. If that’s Nakamura or Karma, I swear I’m throwing my phone out of the window.

It was Nakamura. She has actually called me a lot more than just this one time like she had blown up my phone. I hit answer.

“What. Do. You. Want?” I said through gritted teeth. I was just done at this point. I didn’t want to talk. Not to anyone. Especially not to her.

“What I want is to know just what the FUCK you were thinking?” I’m not dealing with someone who was going to scold me right now. I click the end call button and shut off my phone completely. I would like to see her bother me now.

~~~~~~

Monday, February 6th

I wake up and wonder if I even want to go to school today. I’m going to see those two. Like what am I even going to say? I wish it was yesterday again. Because on Sunday, I didn’t have to do anything that day. I groan as I roll out of bed; this is going to be the absolute worst school day ever.

I saw Karma at the station. He tried to come up to me, but I just turned the other way. I guess he didn’t get the hint because he came over anyway.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” I glared at him as I walked onto the train.

“Fine then, don’t. Stay mad. I can die knowing I tried mending things, but when I’m dead can you live with the guilt of not trying, Shiota. Because if you can, I guess we shouldn’t have been friends in the first place,” That struck me like an arrow through the heart. Maybe it’s because he’s not wrong. If he were to die tomorrow, and I left things like this I don’t think I could live with myself. I guess I was so mad at the situation that I didn’t even think about him. He's the sick one. Now I'm just the selfish friend who couldn't get it together. He turned around and went to the other side to sit down. He is dying and I yelled at him. I know I should apologize, but I don’t even know how or where to begin. It’s now or never though.

I walked over to where he was sitting, looking at his phone.

“Hey um,” he looked up at me. Oh wow this is so much harder than I thought.

“Do you finally want to talk now that you realize you were in the wrong? Or do you just not want to live with the guilt?” He was so harsh at times, but in this instance he deserved to be as harsh as he wanted to be. I looked down. I don’t even think I can actually face him anymore.

“Can I talk to you later; maybe not on the subway?” I whispered softly. He just shrugged and went back to looking at his phone. The rest of the ride was silent. Very silent and very awkward.

“Okay, when do you want to talk?” he says as he stepped off. He doesn’t even look at me, he just keeps walking.

“If it’s ok with you, I would like to talk right now. I know it’s almost time for school, but-” he cut me off because I could even finish.

“Sure I know this pretty cool park; we can just skip today. Y’know if the goody-two-shoes Shiota can handle that,” ok at this point he’s just rubbing it in. I just nod.

The walk was just as silent as the ride. God, I really regret being such a jerk. If I weren't such a jerk we wouldn't be doing this right now. We get to the park and sit under a tree. I waited for a few more minutes before even saying anything.

“So um, I obviously said some stuff that I shouldn't have. Like some stuff that no person, let alone friend, should ever say. I didn’t mean any of it. I was just scared, for like you I mean. I also was angry at the situation, not really you. I guess I was also hurt that you told Nakamura first. I obviously shouldn’t be able to tell you who you can and can’t tell. I also don’t think you’re evil. You're my favorite person ever and you've helped me through a lot and I am really terrible for not being there. I guess I really don’t know what else to say other than you didn’t deserve what I said, and I’m super sorry,” I look down; I probably should look him in the eyes. It's the nicer thing to do; I just don’t have the confidence to.

“Wow, kinda a shitty apology I’m not gonna lie,” he sighed, putting his arms behind his head and resting them against the tree we were sitting under. Dang well I thought it was at least kind of decent. He doesn't even apologize half the time. I rack my brain for something better, but Karma beats me to it.

“Y’know, most people wouldn’t accept that. Especially for how bad it was because, not gonna lie, that stuff you said hurt. Like it hurt a lot. Hearing that from your best friend? It cuts deep, but I can’t be mad at you for too long Nagi-chan,” he flashed me a smile and ruffled my powder blue hair. I try to push his hand away, but that doesn’t stop from being his evil self. He moved his hands and started to tickle my sides mercilessly. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“K-karma, s-stop,” I said between laughter. There wasn’t even a point in fighting back. He could easily overpower me. I still tried to though. He stopped for a moment to cough.

“Karma, are you ok?” I immediately stopped laughing and asked. I was so worried; like I was worried beyond belief. He nodded while coughing.

“We do need to finish talking about it though,” he looked over at me and leaned back against the tree, “you have to promise to not blow up this time because if you do, I won't accept the next apology no matter how good it is,” I nodded. At least he was honest.

“Ok just give it to me straight just don’t hold anything back; I’m able to take it this time,” that was a tad bit of a lie; I don’t really know if I can take any more. This time I might just cry. I'll just turn into a sobbing mess. I can see it now.

“Don’t speak until I’m done because if you yell and storm off, at least you’ll know about everything,” I sigh and sit across from him.

“I swear I won’t say anything; I just want to know why you told Nakamura first?” I wasn’t gonna lie, it sucked having to ask because I shouldn’t be this jealous, but I just had to know.

“You dork,” he ruffled my hair, “the reason I told her first was because I didn’t want to worry you; I honestly was planning on waiting even longer. I know that sounds dumb, but it's true. She convinced me to tell you before it would be too late, and I wouldn’t get a chance to do it properly. I figured she was right; I didn’t think you would react the way you did or otherwise I probably would’ve gone about different,” he looked at me and I looked down. He’s just rubbing it in at this point, and I wouldn’t blame him. I feel him poke my shoulder, so I look up.

“I forgave you though, so it is pretty much old news,” he shrugged; I was about to say something, but he started first.

“Yeah I’m going to the doctors today we’re gonna-,” he stops mid sentence to cough. That is not normal. I know I’m not a doctor, but I’m sure it's not normal. I just sat and waited. I didn’t want to upset him or anything. After a while of coughing, he finished the sentence.

“As I was saying I’m going to the doctors today; y’know to see where I’m at,” he signs and rests his head back against the tree.

“Can I ask you a question?” I ask softly, my hands tugging gently at the grass.

“Yeah go for it. But hey if it’s a date I’m free after the doctor,” he winked and snickered. I felt my face start to burn up. He is such a little devil sometimes. It made me roll my eyes while I tried my best to ignore how hot my face felt. He was so stupid at times. I hate it when he flirts because I wish, I really wish, he meant it.

“No Karma, it's not a date. It’s actually about your condition and stuff,” I look up and meet his eyes. He opted to nod instead of verbally saying something.

“Does it hurt? Please don’t downplay it either. I want to know,” I whispered out. I could feel tears already pricking my eyes, and he hadn’t even said anything yet. I can't believe I'm breaking down so fast. He looked at me and sat straight up.

“Yes, Nagi-chan. It hurts a lot. Some days I don’t even want to get out of bed. Other days it's not so bad; it just depends,” I sniffled. I was so scared that something like that would be said.

“Then why do you still do the stuff you do? Doesn’t it hurt?” I know it was stupid to ask, but I just have to know.

“Well Nagi-chan,” he sighs and grabs my hands in his, “I like to have fun with my friends because if I’m going to die I at least want to have a few good memories when I go. And yeah it hurts. When I played skee ball with Sugino Terasaka, and Isogai, that hurt a lot. I honestly don’t know how I made it through that, I’m not gonna lie. And not to mention playing Dance Dance Revolution with Kayano. That hurt more than anything I’ve done in a while. That’s why I sat down after because if I didn’t, I might have collapsed, but watching those stupid goofy smiles on their faces is all worth it,” he said, smiling sadly. I shook my head vigorously.

“It isn’t worth it though,” he let go of one of my hands, and moved his to wipe away some of the tears that were flowing down my face. I sniffled. If I wasn't so sad I would appreciate it.

“Nagi-chan it’s worth it for me though. I like seeing your guy’s smiles. Especially your smile Nagi-chan. Yours is my favorite. So stop crying, it's not a good look on you. It’s not very cute,” Karma continued to wipe away the tears on my face until I stopped crying. I wrapped my arms around him. I can’t believe he’s going to be gone forever. It kills me not knowing when he's gonna be gone either. He pulled me in so I was sitting next to him. I put my head on his shoulder.

"Hey Nagi-chan," he starts.

"If it's more bad news, I might not be able to handle it. I'm already crumbling, and if there's more I don't know if I'll be able to stop crying by next Monday," I half joke as I look at him. He shook his head with a smile plastered on his face.

"No, Nagi-chan it's not more bad news; it's something else. Something else that's a little bit odd considering the timing, but I figured I just wanted to tell you anyway," I nod, giving him the go ahead to tell me.

"I like you. And not just the boring friend like. I like like you. It's dumb because you're my best friend, and I probably just ruined our friendship, but I just wanted to let you know," he looked away from me and I sat up. He almost looked ashamed and embarrassed. I felt a little overwhelmed because hearing the love of your life tell you that they're dying and then that they love you? Yeah, that is a weird turn. I look at him blankly for a second. When what he said finally sunk in I didn't know what to say.

"Karma you could've told me sooner! Like maybe before your death sentence! Oh my God Karma, I've liked you ever since we met! I can't believe you're telling me this now. Oh my gosh, you have the worst timings," I exclaim as I throw my hands in the air.

"So what I'm hearing is, you like me back," he smirked. I both hate and love that smirk because it sets my face ablaze every time.

"I'm now questioning my decision," I huff and cross my arms. He rolls his eyes.

"So maybe that date is an option now?" he winks as he smirks.

"Only if I get to choose," I smirk back, as he groans in annoyance.

"Fine, but don't make it boring," he rolls his eyes. I would like to think I make no trips boring, but I'll let it slide.

"How about coffee? Coffee dates are fun. I think. I don't really know," I've never been on a date. Maybe I should've let him choose.

"Okay we can go after my hospital visit," he flashes a smile. Isn't that terrible timing for a date? Whatever, I guess he wants to crunch in as many things in as possible.

"Okay Karma, but does that mean I'm going with you to the doctor's appointment?" I can feel myself start to fidget and get nervous just saying that statement. It isn't a statement I thought I would ever have to say.

"Sure, why not? You can say hi to my parents too! They love seeing you!" I rarely see his parents, but whatever, I'll entertain the idea.

"Um okay Karma, but wouldn't I just like sit in the waiting room? Isn't that awkward?" I ask because there is no way I want to sit there for two hours looking like a complete weirdo that has fun by sitting in waiting rooms.

"No, people probably won't even notice you, and if they do, just tell them you're waiting for someone; it's not that weird," when he puts it like that it really isn't that weird. I just nod.

We spent the rest of the time talking about random things. It was a nice change from all of the heavy topics we talked about today. In the middle of a conversation about how to kill Korosensei, he got a call. He picked up and said 'hello'. He said a few other things, but I didn't really pay any mind since it's not my business. When he finished he put his phone in his pocket and stood up.

"Okay Nagi-chan, time to go," he dusted himself off, grabbed his bag and started on his way. I hurriedly got up and grabbed mine. I walked up to his side and continued our conversation.

We had to stop a few times before we got there. He insisted it was just because it was a long walk, but I knew that wasn't the case. I brushed it off anyway. I didn't want to push it; at least not anymore than I already have.

~~~~~~

When we reached the hospital, his parents were already there.

"Hi Mr. and Mrs. Akabane," I flash a smile and wave. I've only met them a few times, and even then it was only a few minutes. They probably don't even remember my name.

"Hello Nagisa," Mrs. Akabane smiled. I guess I stand corrected. I remember her being really nice. Well, when she talked that was. Neither of his parents talked all that much; at least not when I was around.

"If we don't hurry we'll be late," he rolled his eyes and grabbed my hand and intertwined my fingers with his, as he practically dragged me in. I could hear his parents whispering behind us. This was very embarrassing. Especially, when he didn't let go as he was checking in. He did let go when we sat down. It may sound like I'm complaining because I don't like it, but I did like it just not in public. Oh, and maybe, not around his parents.

Karma just stares on his phone again while I sit tapping my feet on the floor and playing with my fingers. I don't know why I'm the nervous one. It's not even my doctor's appointment. Maybe it's because I don't know what the results will be? He grabbed one of my hands to stop me from fiddling around with them. I looked at him to see that he didn't even look up. I'm kind of glad wasn't looking, so he couldn't see how flushed my cheeks were from just that small gesture.

"So you two finally got together. I'm really happy for you too," his mom gave a big smile. I'm pretty sure I died of embarrassment on the spot. I was speechless. I wish the ground would swallow me and my embarrassment whole. Luckily Karma looked up to say something because I have no idea what to say.

"Yeah we just got together actually. We're actually going to go on a date after this, so you don't have to drive me home or anything," he said then immediately looked back down at his phone. Maybe I didn't want him to say something because all it did was make me more red. I could see his eyes flicker up to mine. I saw that stupid mischievous glint in his eyes and a stupid smirk playing across his face. I loved them when they weren't being used against me. After a few minutes I got bored.

"Hey Karma, what are you doing on your phone?" I asked and started to move over to see, but he quickly moved his phone to his chest. Okay that was weird, really weird.

"Y'know you shouldn't just snoop through someone's phone Nagi-chan," he raised his eyebrow. Maybe don't act like you're hiding things. What could he even be hiding?

I huffed and yanked my hand out of his grasp to cross my arms, "I was just wondering. I didn't think it was that secretive," I could practically feel him roll his eyes at my somewhat childish behavior. He poked my side, and I moved my head to glare at him.

"I was just playing a game, and you spooked me, that's all, Nagi-chan," he showed me his phone. He could have just changed apps, but I trust him.

"Can I watch?" I ask, leaning my head on his shoulder. I really didn't give him a choice in the matter.

"Of course, Nagi-chan. You can even try if you want," he gave me a smile as he handed me his phone. I played on his phone while he watched. When he was called back I was just stuck waiting there by myself. It was the worst doctor's visit of my life; that's maybe a lie, but it still sucked, plus it was boring.

~~~~~~

He walked out coughing, his mom walked out crying, and his dad walked out looking as sad as a man that shows little emotion does. His dad was trying to comfort his mom, but that wasn't helping. Whatever happened looked like it was bad. Really, really bad. I wanted to go over there, but I didn't know when was a good time to. When he was done coughing he said something and hugged them. Then they walked out the doors and presumably left. I get up and walk up to him.

"What was the news?" I ask. I didn't really want to know considering how bad the reaction looked.

"We should maybe get out of the hospital; we're in people's way," he grabbed my hand, and we walked out the doors.

"So will you tell me now?" I look up at him.

"Yeah, there's really not much to tell. Nothing much has changed," he looks at me for a quick second and flashes me a smile before he goes back to looking ahead.

"Karma, I know that's a lie. If nothing has changed, then why was your mom crying her eyes out?" I drag him to a bench near the hospital and sit down.

"She was only crying because she still can't believe her one and only child is dying," he leaned against the back of the bench. I knew that wasn't all. There was no way that's all it was.

"Karma no more lying, please," I beg. I need him to be honest. I need to know how much longer he has.

"Well-" he starts coughing again. I know, I just know, that's not right. I sit and wait patiently.

"Well Nagi-chan you really saw right through me didn’t you?" he chuckled, moving his head so he could see me. I just sit and wait for him to continue. He sighs and makes eye-contact with me.

"Well Nagi-chan, my body finished that deal with death," this couldn't be happening. He needs to clarify that because if not my heart might finally split in two. Well, as if it wasn't already.

"Y'know how I said if it spreads to my lungs it's a done deal? Well it finally made it, and it made it a lot faster than they thought it would," I shook my head. This can't be happening. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a hug. I cried into his shirt. I'm sure I soaked it, but that wasn't really my main concern right now. He laid his head on the top of mine.

"That doesn't mean I still don't have time," he moves his hand to play with one of my pig tails. I just held him closer. I'm going to miss it, but worst of all, I don't even know how much longer I'll even have it.

"Come on, I already told you tears aren't cute on you. Wipe them off and let's go to the coffee shop," he pushed me off of him and wiped my tears again. I honestly am surprised I still have tears left to cry. I'm not really in the mood for coffee anymore, but I'm not going to let him down because I can't accept the fact that he's going to be gone soon. I need to be here for him, and I will be; no matter how hard it is.

~~~~~~

The walk there was mostly Karma talking and me attempting to make a half decent conversation while I was still reeling from the news.

I can't believe this is going to be gone in a few weeks. I'm not even going to be able to enjoy being together with him before it's ripped away.

When we reached the coffee shop we grabbed our respective coffees, and sat at a table in the back. I asked him the question I've been dreading.

"Did they say about h-how long? Like a-about how long you have l-left," I'm barely able to even choke out those words. I can't imagine it's long.

"Well, to be honest, I wouldn't say long," he sighed and played with the lid of his cup. I can't believe I'm hearing this. I don't want to believe I'm hearing this. He's going to die, and it's going to be soon. I always thought that we would grow up together, and now I have to hear he's not going to grow up at all. I just nod because there's nothing to say.

I want to cry. I want to scream. I want to yell out how unfair this is, but I know that's going to do no good. The rest of the coffee 'date', if you can even call it that anymore, was just Karma trying to halfway cheer me up. He just told me he was going to die and soon. I really don't think he'll be able to cheer me up ever.

"Hey, Nagi-chan I think maybe we should go," he gave me a small smile. He probably could sense I wasn't really feeling it right now. I nodded and grabbed his hand as we left the shop.

The walk to the station was a quiet one; the ride was just as silent. I go to get up, but Karma gets up with me. This isn't his stop.

"Karma, this isn't your stop," I look at him, slightly confused. He looked at me and smiled.

"I know but I figured I'd walked you home," he grabbed my hand and started towards the exit, but I tugged him back.

"No, Karma, I can go alone, you shouldn't be doing stuff like this," I scold. He rolls his eyes, ignores me and continues to drag me out even with my protests.

"Okay now since we're off I might as well go right?" He smirked, knowing that he had won, and was probably going to win anyway. He is so incredibly infuriating at times. I sighed and started walking.

"Hey I forgot that I never even asked you to be my boyfriend, so will you be my boyfriend?" I stopped dead in my tracks. I hope I heard him right. I looked up at him. He had a light pink dusting in his cheeks, and a sheepish smile plastered on his face. I could feel a grin creep onto my face. It felt good not being the one who was flustered.

"Of course Karma. I would love to be your boyfriend," I stand on my tippy toes and give him a light peck on the lips. I could feel my face explode in various shades of red, but I tried to ignore it because now I get to see how red Karma’s face is. I'm pretty sure it matches his hair. I didn't take long for him to snap out of it and to lean in and smash our lips together. It left me shocked for a few seconds before I felt my eyelids flutter shut and I practically melted into the kiss.

I know everybody says that fireworks go off when you kiss someone you love, but there were fireworks and explosions and every other amazing thing. He still had a tinge of coffee flavor left on his lips from earlier. I always imagined kissing him. I never thought it would actually happen though.

After a few more seconds we broke free, gasping for air.

"Wow that was.." I struggle to find a good word to describe how amazing that kiss was.

"Amazing? Magnificent? Better than you ever thought? What can I say, I'm a great kisser," he smirked at me which made me roll my eyes. He can't stop being a flirt for five seconds.

"I wouldn't say 'great kisser'. You are pretty decent though I'll give you that," I giggled, as I teased him. He leant back down and kissed me again causing me to turn red. Even though we just kissed.

"Better?" He smirked. I just muttered a small 'shut up', grabbed his hand, and continued the walk to my house because now I am embarrassed. I can hear him snickering quietly.

~~~~~~

When we got to my house he kissed me goodbye and left.

I walked in and my mom was sitting at the table.

"Hey mom," I smiled at her, "I have something to tell you," I want her to be happy for me, but I can never tell how she'll react to anything. She's in a good mood, so it'll be good to tell her now. She looked up at me.

"Yes Nagisa," I really hope this doesn't go south.

"So I got a boyfriend," she nodded.

"I assume it's that Karma boy you hang out with so much," she looked me dead in the eyes. I nodded. I can't tell if this is going well or not.

"Well I'm happy for you. Now I have some stuff to do; dinner is in the fridge," wow, I can't tell if she was happy for me or if she just didn't care. Either way she's not mad so that's a plus.

I go to the fridge and grab out my dinner. I shove it in the microwave and wait. When it's done I sit at the table and pull out my phone while I eat.

Nagisa: Hey are we gonna tell the class?

I'm going to be honest; I'm kind of scared to tell the class. I'm sure they'll be fine with it, but I can't help but be nervous. I almost instantly get a reply.

Karma: Only if you want to

Nagisa: I mean I'm kinda nervous I'm not gonna lie

Karma: Well I'm sure they will accept us

Nagisa: I know but I'm still scared

Karma: Well I'll be right there with you so it's ok

Nagisa: Ok

Karma: Should we just tell them tomorrow

Nagisa: Sure :)

After that, the conversation was pretty much over. I grab my dish and do the dishes before I go to bed. I was absolutely exhausted.