The One With The Confession

Kim Ha-Jun

His lips curled into a smile. Today, Kim Ha-Jun will finally confess his feelings to the Lady in Blue. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach every time the thought crossed his mind. He fixed his collar and gave himself a once-over in the mirror.

"I look hot," he complimented himself. "Maybe I should wear formal wear often."

With that, he grabbed his cell phone and keys from the table and left his apartment. Everything about today was perfect. Soft, honey-like rays of sunshine illuminated the surroundings; trees swayed with the cool breeze. Some leaves were falling off of trees on the pavements. It was a perfect Autumn day. Because Blue's apartment was close to Ha-Jun's, he preferred to walk. They planned to spend the whole day together, and by the end, he would confess.

On the way, a flower shop caught his eye.

"Hello, ma'am," smiled he, coming face-to-face with the shopkeeper. The shopkeeper smiled and greeted the young man.

"Ha-Jun-ah," said she with a bright smile. "What brings you here?"

"I wanted to get a bouquet," said Kim Ha-Jun, a noticeable tint of red highlighted on his cheeks.

The woman smiled. "Oh? Is it for someone special?"

He nodded. The woman chuckled and swiftly moved into the deeper end of the shop (where the flowers were kept). Ha-Jun followed the older woman. Colorful flowers decorated the whole of the shop. It gave off floral, barbie-like vibes to him. Even though he'd been to the shop many times before, the sight of this flowery embellishment never ceased to amaze him.

"What flowers does she like?" asked the woman as she swiftly cut off pieces from wrapping paper.

"Uhh, I never asked her." Ha-Jun rubbed the back of his neck. "What do you think would be the perfect flowers for her?"

"Hmm," the woman thought. "What can you tell me about her? Let me see if I can work my magic with that."

"Umm, she's bubbly, sweet, caring, a good listener, and brilliant! She's like me. Sunshine."

The woman nodded and plucked yellow roses. Before long, she handed over a perfectly gorgeous bouquet of yellow roses.

"Here." She handed the bouquet to Kim Ha-Jun. "Yellow represents positive feelings. Joy, happiness, and hope and all within Yellow's domain. It matches the description you gave me of the girl."

Kim Ha-Jun smiled and bowed. "Thank you, ma'am."

The older woman patted his shoulder. "Now, run. Let me know how it goes later."

Ha-Jun grinned. "I will."

~

The door to the apartment swung open, revealing the Lady in Blue. Ha-Jun's heart did a little flip upon seeing her. The girl smiled. She was dressed in her usual soft blue attire. Her wavy brown locks were tied neatly in a headband.

"This is for my favorite person," smiled Ha-Jun as he handed her the carefully created yellow roses bouquet. "I couldn't come empty-handed, could I?"

Kim Cheon-sa chuckled. "Of course not. It'd be weird if you showed up empty-handed."

"How weird?" Kim Ha-Jun curiously asked.

"Hmm, I might think you were kidnapped, and your doppelganger is here to kidnap me as well."

Ha-Jun laughed heartily. "Okay, I realize now how out-of-character that would've been. Thank god, I got you something."

The woman nodded as she swiftly locked the doors.

"Shall we?"

"After you, ma'am."

The duo left the building and made a beeline to the first spot of the day: the café. Upon reaching, they quickly made their regular order and booked the table near the window. For the first few minutes, a comfortable silence enveloped them.

Kim Ha-Jun cleared his thoughts. "Did you love the flowers?"

Cheon-sa glanced at the flowers neatly placed at the end of the table. The yellow flowers reminded her of happiness and hope. It lifted her mood as soon as she laid her eyes on them. It also reminded her of the man in front of her. Yellow resonated with Kim Ha-Jun.

"I love them," said she.

"But..?" Ha-Jun sensed there was something more to it.

"There's no but, Ha-Jun," she denied. "I love them. They remind me of you. Bright, bubbly, sunshiney. The color Yellow resonates with you perfectly."

The ends of his lips pulled downwards.

"Hey, don't feel disheartened," comforted she. "I love these flowers. They're stunning."

"But they don't resonate with you. I should've known better."

"It's alright," said she. "I'm glad. Every time I look at them, they'll remind me of you. Isn't that better than looking at flowers that remind me of myself?"

"Yeah, they are." He smiled at her.

A nagging feeling gnawed him. No matter how much he tried, the emotion kept bugging him. He shook his head to get rid of it but failed. Even if she said she loved the flowers, something in her tone said that she wasn't expecting the yellow flowers from him, out of all people. He mentally slapped himself for the error.

"Pabo!" He mentally reprimanded himself. Once he was done scolding, he took a deep breath and focused on the brighter side. There was still a whole day left to make things right. He held onto a sliver of hope.

The next stop was an amusement park. When the park came into sight, Cheon-sa's eyes lit up.

"We're going to an amusement park?" She asked with a twinkle in her eyes. He nodded.

Before he could tell her more, she raced to the counter to buy tickets.

"Hey, wait up!" He rushed to catch up.

~

"Okay, we're going on that now," Cheon-sa pointed at the rollercoaster. Ha-Jun's eyes widened for a quick second before he schooled his expression. He cleared his throat.

"Sure, I'll get the tickets."

He ran off to the counter to get the tickets. A feeling of dread hit him. He glanced at the screaming people on the rollercoaster and then at the long queue. The longer he waited in the line, the more his heart was filled with fear. Acrophobia was getting to him. He shook his head to get rid of the thoughts. It was going to be okay, he repeatedly reassured himself. He wouldn't look down and only focus on the woman beside him. The idea of Sung-Hoon taking away Blue played a vital role in pushing him to face his fears. There was no way he was giving her up.

He inhaled deeply and pushed through his fears. Soon enough, he stood at the counter and purchased two tickets for the ride.

"Here," Ha-Jun uttered once he got back ."I got the tickets."

"Are you alright?" Cheon-sa noticed something was off. "You seem off."

"I'm alright," he smiled. "Let's go."

Kim Ha-Jun braced himself for the scariest rollercoaster ride of his life. He mentally noted never to get on a rollercoaster ever again.

~

Settled and secured tightly with seatbelts, Kim Ha-Jun dared to look below him. The sight was making him nauseous. Yet, he remained determined to enjoy the ride with her. Cheon-sa seemed thrilled to ride the rollercoaster. Her eyes lit up, and she giggled like a small child. The sight of her calmed him down. One look at her and he would forget everything. Nothing scared him as long as she was right by his side.

"Look how amazing it looks from up here," said she. "If only we could always be on the top of the world."

"Y-Yeah, it looks great," he stuttered.

"You sound weird," she pointed out. "You're not scared, are you?"

"No!" Kim Ha-Jun quickly defended himself. "I'm not scared. Why would I be scared of a ride?"

The cart started pushing.

"Heh, look, it's moving." Ha-Jun's voice went squeaky. Before he could brace himself, the cart sped down with immense speed. Screams filled the air. Even Ha-Jun was forced to scream his heart out. Cheon-sa might've been the only one who screamed in a thrill while the others feared for their lives.

"YOU JUST SAID YOU WEREN'T AFRAID!" she screamed higher than others.

"I LIED! I'M SORRY!" Ha-Jun screamed. "I DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND LIKE A SCAREDY CAT!"

"I WOULDN'T HAVE MINDED IF YOU SAID NO, HA-JUN!" screamed Cheon-sa. "I WOULDN'T DO ANYTHING YOU DIDN'T WISH TO! IF YOU HAD TOLD ME YOU HAD ACROPHOBIA, I WOULDN'T HAVE INSISTED ON COMING HERE!"

"HOW DOES THE HEIGHT AND THE SPEED NOT SCARE YOU?!"

"IT'S FREEING! THAT'S WHY!"

For the entirety of the ride, Ha-Jun clutched onto Cheon-sa's hand for support. She chuckled. Soon enough, the ride came to a smooth stop. Both their hairs were a complete mess. Ha-Jun seemed much more shaken than her. While the others got out of the coaster, Ha-Jun took some time to compose himself. Cheon-sa waited for him.

"You feel like going on a second round?" she teased.

"NO!"

~

The sun's rays painted the skies red, yellow, and orange. The two had one last spot to visit before they called it for the day. After the rollercoaster ride, embarrassment filled his being. He couldn't look her in the eye after that incident. For the rest of the walk, he stared at the ground.

Cheon-sa rolled her eyes. "Are you going to ignore me now?"

He saw his chances with her decreasing by the second. He wondered if it was a great idea to continue seeing her. He was confident they were alike, but now he worried if she was the right match. First the flowers, then the rollercoaster ride; did he know her as much as he claimed?

"I'm not ignoring you," mumbled he. "I'm observing the ground."

"You've seen the pavement countless times before," said she. "Look at me." She grabbed his chin to face her.

"Tell me what's up."

"I don't wish to talk about it."

"I don't accept that as an answer." She crossed her arms against her chest.

Kim Ha-Jun sighed. "It's nothing; can we not talk about it?"

"Something is clearly bothering you," pushed Cheon-sa. "If you don't talk about it, how am I supposed to know what's up? You have been like this since morning."

Unable to keep the thoughts to himself, he decided to tell her everything.

"Okay, you want to hear it?" She nodded. "Fine, here goes."

He took a deep breath.

"I like you," began he."I have liked you from the moment I met you at the hospital. I enjoy spending time with you. You keep me calm during my worst moment - the rollercoaster ride and make me the happiest man alive."

Blue's eyes widened, but she kept quiet till he finished.

"I have been much happier since I met you. Every day, I wake up looking forward to seeing you. My heart races and flips at the sight of you. We have so much in common that it's almost absurd that we're not together yet!"

"But?"

Kim Ha-Jun sighed. "But now I have this tugging feeling in my heart. I am not so sure if we should be together. I know Sung-Hoon likes you too, and the thought of him taking you away kills me."

"Sung-Hoon does?"

Kim Ha-Jun nodded.

An involuntary smile played on her lips. Heartbroken, Kim Ha-Jun stepped back.

He gave her a sad smile. "I got my answer."

"Ha-Jun..." she trailed off.

"It's okay," Ha-Jun raised his hands in the air. "Everything's alright. I'm happy for you."

"Kim Ha-Jun, listen to me."

"What's there to listen to?" asked Ha-Jun. "He likes you, you like him back."

He swiftly closed the distance between them.

"I could fight a million guys who want you, Cheon-sa," he paused. "But I can't fight the one you want."

Kim Ha-Jun stepped back. He schooled his expressions and maintained a distance from her. He wasn't going to let her feel bad for turning him down. He'd feel terrible if that happened. He forced a smile.

"Come, let me walk you home."

Cheon-sa nodded.

On the way home, an awkward silence surrounded them. They had nothing to talk about, and they barely made eye contact. Ha-Jun knew it would take a while for the feelings to go away. Once they reached the building, Ha-Jun bowed.

"It was nice seeing you miss."

Cheon-sa rolled her eyes. "You don't have to be so formal with me, Ha-Jun."

"I don't know how else to talk to you. You're going to be my best friend's girlfriend now, I have to maintain some sort of a formality."

"So, that's it?" Cheon-sa asked. "You wouldn't even consider me as a friend?"

"I-"

"We're both adults, Kim Ha-Jun. Just because I like your best friend doesn't mean I care about you any less. You're a great friend. I don't want to lose you over this."

Ha-Jun pursed his lips and nodded.

"I'll see you around."

Cheon-sa sighed and watched him walk away.