Chapter 8

I sucked air in like I hadn't taken a breath in days. Immediately I threw myself forward as my body convulsed in a coughing fit, struggling to bring in enough air to fill my burning lungs. But I was alive, in my own body again, and it seemed for the most part I was healed. I looked myself over, the bandages that were covering my chest had been removed, and replaced with smooth, mostly unblemished flesh. There were thin scars, but grace or a witch's power could only do so much. I tested the rest of my limbs, moving everything gingerly and testing for breaks before taking in the rest of my surroundings. I was in the bunker again, laying on the map table. At least I'd been right about Ketch having to bring me back here. But where was everyone? There was no welcoming party waiting for me to come back to. I pushed myself to the edge and then off of the map table, taking careful steps until my legs felt sturdy again. 

"Dean?" I called weakly, walking towards the hall, "Sam?"

There was no response, but I could begin to hear voices coming from the study. It sounded like an argument. What could it have been about? I knew the boys wouldn't be happy about Ketch bringing me here battered to hell after ignoring them for forty-eight hours, but that wasn't anything new at this point, or at least the disappearing part wasn't. The suit carrying my lifeless body might have been. I started to listen the closer I got to the study.

"Ok, you brought her back. We healed her, you know she's ok. Why are you still here?" That was Dean, I would recognize his barely concealed dislike anywhere. 

"As I've already explained," That was Ketch, good. He was ok. "I have nowhere else to go. I'll be hunted down. This is the safest option."

"I'd say good riddance…" Dean again.

"Dean.." Sam huffed as I came around the door frame, "He did bring us…"

The conversation stopped, all eyes on me.

"No, please. Don't stop the party just because I'm here." I cracked, my throat dry.

I was immediately pulled into a bear hug, Dean holding me close and squeezing. "You're gonna break my ribs." I squeaked out.

"I don't care. We'll fix them again." He mumbled but released me all the same.

Sam came next, pulling me into a gentler hug before tussling my hair and letting go. "Next time, please just come home." 

"I'll think about it," I smiled, fixing my hair and finally laying eyes on Ketch. They'd tied him to a chair, and he looked like Dean hadn't been very nice about it. A black eye and bruised lip were evidence enough of that. "Dean…he saved my life." I walked over to the chair, running my hand over Ketch' shoulder as I walked behind it.

"And? He's the reason you were in that situation." Dean huffed, folding his arms across his chest.

"No, I did that to myself. Got too nosey." I said, focusing on undoing the knots of rope until Ketch could pull his wrists free.

He sighed, rubbing his wrists where they'd been held and giving me a small thank you. I walked back around to the boys.

"I have a…" My phone rang, "I'll fill you in in a moment."

I took the phone out of my pocket, and an unfamiliar number on the screen. I hit answer, hope beating through my heart.

"Elly?" I waited, uneasy.

"I'm so fucking glad you answered." She sounded relieved.

"Where are you?" I asked.

"I'm not sure. There are a couple of street signs. Hang on, let me look for a newspaper or something." The line went silent, only the wind blew through the receiver for a few seconds. "I think I'm in Protection? I don't know. That's the only city name I can find."

"Hang on, El. I can have Sam trace the call." I gave my younger brother a look and he went straight to work as I put Elly on speaker. "What's the street names El?"

"Uhh.." She paused again, "West Walnut and North Broadway."

"Got her," Sam said.

"Right, did you hear that? Sam's got you. I'll send them to come get you ok?" I instructed, "It'll be about four hours, El. Find a safe place to stay until then."

"Ok." She sounded so far away, it was hard to think she was so close now.

"I'll see you soon." I hung up, looking at my brothers and guest.

"Right. A lot of explaining to do in little time." I took a deep breath, "Elly was being hunted. Someone sent a Hellhound through to her. I killed it, she stepped through the rift it came through and now she's here. I need you to go get here please, before something else finds her."

"Roger that," Dean said, instantly moving to leave the room and get ready for a road trip. "We'll get her back safe. You stay here with that and make sure nothing happens."

"It'll be fine Dean. He won't do anything." I rolled my eyes.

"Ya. The last time we all thought that he locked us in here with no air and a bitch." He called as he left.

I looked at Sam, who only shrugged before following Dean. I sighed, rubbing my temples. Dean could be so stubborn. I understood his hatred and dislike of Ketch. There were some damn good reasons for it and I was not about to argue away any of them. But if I ever wanted to admit to them that there was more here than just an occasional fuck, I needed that mindset to at least alter a little. 

"How long was I out for?" I asked, turning to Ketch. 

"A day, maybe a bit more." He said, standing now that the boys were gone.

He stepped towards me, reaching a hand for my waist and pulling me to him. I sank into him, letting myself relax. He rested his chin on top of my head and breathed deeply.

"I thought you were gone." He spoke softly.

I laughed. "Nah, I have a funny way of coming back. Kinda like a cockroach."

We stood in silence for a moment, just enjoying the comfort we brought one another. It was going to be a hard sell to Sam and Dean, but I had to begin at least admitting to myself that this was what I wanted. This comfort in another person. Even if he had previously tried to kill us and there were things he needed to redeem himself of, there was something that couldn't pull me away anymore.

"I'm glad you're ok. I thought Asmodeus would've killed you too." I pushed away from his chest, looking up into his eyes. 

"He tried. But I managed to escape the brunt of his anger." He searched my face, "That angel really does a good job of healing."

"They called Cas then." I nodded, that was good. I doubted Rowena would've wanted anything to do with the bunker if she knew Ketch was here. "I'm sorry about Dean. He's just…protective."

"He could be a little less 'protective'," He finally released me, instead taking my hand and leading me from the room. 

"What are you doing?" I asked, following him out and down the hall.

"Using the time we have alone wisely." He said in answer. 

I laughed. "Is that a good idea? Aren't you sore?" 

"The only damages are from you brother. I can withstand a few hours of us." He pulled me into one of the many unused guest rooms. Bare save for the bed and empty dresser against the wall. 

It was quick to start once the door closed. Heavy breaths filled the room as he pulled me to him once again, lips crashing together and fingers caressing skin. We had had several days of close calls and high stress. I still owed him my life and I was keen on repaying it in any way he liked. I knew in the back of my head things would never work out. This would never stick. But he had saved me, found my body mangled, and had taken care of me. Helped me. If that wasn't a sign then I would never know what was. 

 In this moment pain and stress had no home. It was just the feeling of his hands on my body, my own hands clinging onto him as if he would disappear if I let go of any part. We went fast at first, grabbing and pulling clothes off. But everything slowed after that. It was tender touches and soft kisses as we made our way to the bed. Ketch' rough hands were delicate as they traced old and new scars, finding the sensitive but pleasurable areas with ease. 

He carefully kissed away any aches I still had, leaving only bliss. It was absolutely euphoric when he dipped below, his tongue fanning the growing flames. He brought that sweet edge so close before stopping, I whined until his lips found mine again and he whispered sweet nothings against them. 

He pushed in slowly, asking if I was ok when I bit my lip. I nodded, encouraging him to continue until he was fully sheathed. A sweet shiver passed through us both. How long had we both waited for this? This feeling of full completion. The missing pieces fit into place once again. The pace was slow and low rumbles of pleasure came from his chest. I cupped his face and brought it down to mine, kissing him sweetly. It was the permission he was looking for. The pace increased until we were both sweaty, moaning messes. Breath dense and hot. Clinging to each other. Minds fighting to not give in yet, to stay here and enjoy this feeling. There wasn't much left when my nails clawed down his back and he bit my neck. The bliss was pure, euphoric, tingling bliss. I wanted it to last forever. 

"I think," I said between breaths, "I'm falling for you."

Ketch laughed, pulling away and falling next to me on the bed. "Is that a problem?"

I smiled, laughing too. "No, I don't think so."

"Good." He said, pulling me to him.

I cuddled into his chest, closing my eyes.

Elly would be here soon.

"What. The fuck?" The bright light of the room came on, pulling me from a sleep I hadn't known I'd fallen into. "I'm left alone, waiting four hours for some mystical people I've only known on a screen." I buried my face into Ketch' chest, trying to block out the light again, "And you have fucking sex?"

"What?" I asked, groggy and trying to adjust to the light.

"I said, what. THE FUCK?!" The voice was familiar like I'd heard it in my dreams. Yet it was real. "I get harassed by some asshole and you get to be here getting your brain scrambled?!"

My eyes shot open, my brain suddenly cleared, and I sat up to look Elizabeth Castle in the face for the first time. I wanted to say something, anything. But the mere thought of her being here, standing in front of me, in person, alive, was too much for me to process. I'd only ever seen her in mirrors, it was odd to see her long blonde hair tangled, clothes dirty, backpack thrown over one shoulder, and blue eyes full of exhaustion.

"Elly…" It was all I could think of.

"Don't 'Elly' me." She huffed, her cheeks were pink like she'd been running.

I got up from the bed and walked over to her, pulling her into a hug. "I'm so glad you're ok." I breathed her in. She smelled of rain and Baby. 

"I…I'm glad you feel that way…but could you get dressed?" She asked.

Oh right. I was still naked. I pushed away from her, fully embarrassed now. "Well, I've seen yours before." I joked as she looked away from me, "It's only fair."

"I don't mind the view." Right, he was still here too.

I flushed more, "Right, you uh…don't tell Dean.."

"Got it," Elly said, staring around me, "You sure know how to pick 'em."

I laughed, "Thanks, I'll remind you of saying that after you've gotten to know him." I turned her around and pushed her towards the door, "Let me get…cleaned up and I'll talk to you a bit more."

"Ok, I'll be..over there." She said as I closed the door behind her.

I turned around, placing my back against the door.

"Who's that?" Ketch asked. 

"A long story." I sighed, walking back to the bed looking for my scraps of clothing. I found some of them and began to dress.

"We can make time," His hands grasped my hips as I pulled my jeans back on. 

"As much as I love that idea," I turned in his hands, he was still nude, "I need to go talk to her, explain to everyone what's going on," I stretched up and kissed him softly, "But we can talk about the possibility of 'this' again later."

"I'll remember you said that." Ketch smiled. 

I pushed away from him and continued to get dressed as he disappeared to the room's bathroom. I took a deep breath. I was finally going to be face-to-face with Elly. I'd have to explain everything to Dean and Sam. It would be difficult. They knew the gist of how it worked but had no idea just how real she was. And we'd have to explain what she saw, why she was here, what happened with Asmodeus, Ketch…it was a lot. 

I heard laughter and gentle conversation as I entered the map room. Dean was smiling, like he'd just delivered the best joke ever. Nothing changed when I came in. Elly was in a chair, talking to Dean who leaned against the table next to her. Sam sat a little further down, his laptop open in front of him, but he wasn't paying attention to its screen. Cas came out of the kitchen as I walked by the door. This seemed like just another normal day. I smiled.

"So the whole 'Pizza man' thing actually happened?" Elly asked Dean, giggling.

"Ohh ya!" He said, nearly knocking himself off the table laughing, "You should've seen Alex's face."

"I think your reaction was better," I said rounding the table to punch my older brother playfully. "You got so red. Almost like you were thinking right then and there about how to rearrange his mind."

"Hey!" Dean chuckled, going a little pink, "No need to get into that."

"What?" Elly wore a bright smile, "Are you and Cas actually a thing?"

"Well, I...I wouldn't say…" Dean stumbled over his words.

"Dude," Sam said, "We all know, just admit it."

I laughed as Dean's face became more red. Cas came up behind him and placed his hand on Dean's shoulder.

"Dean if they are already suspicious," Cas said, "Why not just be truthful?"

Elly and I continued to laugh as Dean buried his face in his hands, Cas didn't seem to be helping the citation as much as he thought he was. But he was right. We all already knew, there was no use in Dean hiding it anymore, but he would. He always would, that's just the way he was. He wouldn't do it out of concern for us hating them either, he would do it because he thought he was protecting everyone. So that none of his true emotions ever got used against him or us. That's just how Dean was. 

"Honestly Dean," Elly said between giggles, "If you didn't have feathers I'd take ya."

I continued to laugh, "Watch out, feathers gets ruffled easily."

"Speaking of ruffling feathers," Elly cleared her throat, "How the fuck do I get home?"

I stared at her, she hadn't seemed to have grasped the severity of the situation yet. "I honestly don't know El. You're not safe there until we can get rid of the threat."

"She's right," The gruff voice of my demon mentor sounded from behind me, "As long as Asmodeus has your scent you're not safe anywhere. Not even here."

Elly gasped, "He has a thicker accent than in the show."

I chuckled, "Crowley, this is Elly." I introduced my friend, "She's from another world. One where we all only exist on a tv show, except for myself."

"A pleasure Miss Elly." Crowley gave a little bow, "It's good to finally meet you face to face."

"What do you…" I shook my head, "Just add that to the list of questions I have for you later." I took a deep breath, "We have other things that need to be dealt with first."

"Right," Elly said, smacking her hands on the table, "Like how long am I going to be stuck here? I have finals soon."

I opened my mouth to offer another answer when finally Ketch joined us, "We don't know. Safely assume a few weeks. We'll need time to get the proper spell," He came to stand next time to me, "And we'll need to make sure it's safe for you to return before anything else."

"Agreed," I said, "We need to talk about a strategy to make sure she's safe at all times. Set up a system so she's never alone, and then we can deal with Asmodeus." I leaned forward onto the map table for emphasis.

"The bunker is the safest place. The warding should be strong enough that not even Asmodeus can get in." Sam said, looking up from his laptop.

"That's true, but we still have hunting to do, we'll need to have someone here all the time to keep an eye on her," Dean added.

"Well we obviously can't all go on a hunt at the same time," I said, "And we know plenty of other hunters to send out if we need to. Cas needs to keep an eye on angel radio. Crowley is our informant on everything Hell. Charlie has her own shit to figure out with Oz. I don't mind staying but we should keep ourselves open as much as we can."

"Wait why do we have to stay behind?" Dean objected, "And you're not leaving psychopath here with her, either."

"I'm not a nanny anyway," Ketch grumbled.

"I trust you with her, Dean," I said.

"Don't I get a say in my protection?" Elly asked.

"No." It was a chorus of voices. All of us came together in agreement on something we didn't have control over. Elly was an adult. We didn't need to make this choice for her.

"I can find a way to take care of myself." She stated, the room now tense and silent. "Thank you, for getting me here safely and saving my life. But if I don't get a say in this situation, one that I never asked to be in, then I'll deal with it myself. I know how to fight and defend myself. I don't need a babysitter."

She stood up from her chair and started walking towards the hallway. I thought about calling after her, but I had nothing to say. She was completely right. She didn't ask to be here. She didn't ask to be put in danger. It was all my fault. 

"She's right," I sighed. "We need to ask her how she feels about this."

I didn't wait for anyone else to answer before I followed her down the hallway. She hadn't gone far before going into one of the guest rooms, her backpack was already sitting against the bottom of the bed. I entered quietly and saw her sitting on the bed, she'd pulled her legs up to her chest and had her forehead resting against them. I didn't need to see her face to know she was crying, I could hear the quiet sniffling from the doorway.

"Hey," I said gently. "I'm sorry. You're completely right. You have a choice in this." I walked over and sat next to her, "Do you wanna go somewhere and talk about it? Just to two of us?"

She nodded quietly. I stuck my hand out and placed it on top of one of hers, squeezing it gently. I pulled lightly and she got up to follow me. We walked out to the main room again and continued past everyone to the door. I brushed off Dean's questions and continued out. We reached my car and I helped Elly inside before walking to the driver's side and taking her out of the bunker.

I'd driven us an hour away, and now we sat on the hood of my car, staring at the night sky. We'd talked for a while about how Elly was doing. She'd admitted to me how scared she was. How she was trying to be strong for me. And I'd told her she didn't have to be, she wasn't me and it was ok to admit she was scared. We'd talked about how real this all was, about how reality in her world would be very different when she returned. It would likely be months in advanced by the time we could return her. That scared her too. But there was nothing we could do about it right now. We just had to be here. And now we focused on the questions she had. I was doing my best to answer them.

"So let me get this straight." She was giggling again, "Sam never lost his shoe, he never even touched the rabbit's foot? It was you who got cursed?"

"Oh god, it was terrible!" I threw my arms up dramatically, "I couldn't take a step without thinking I was going to kill myself or one of the boys. Dean eventually tied me to a chair in the motel room. Even after that, he had to move me to a chair with wheels because stuff started just flying around the room to hurt me."

"That's so much funnier." Elly said, "I noticed something earlier."

"What's that?" I smiled, looking at her.

"Crowley seems to like you better than the boys. Why's that?" Ah, she was getting into the hard questions now.

"That's a long story," I chuckled, hoping she'd drop it.

"Not like I'm going anywhere anytime soon." She said.

"Alright." I took a deep breath, blowing it out in a sharp whistle, "I was pretty young when I met him. Twelve actually. I'd found out I was dying from leukemia, incurable. I decided I didn't want to. I'd heard stories about crossroads from John and I thought I'd try it out. Never imagined it'd work." I glanced over at her, blushing when I realized she was staring at me, deeply invested, I cleared my throat, "So I made a deal. My ten years came and went and the hounds came for me. I'd met the boys at that point so I went willingly, I didn't want them to bargain for me, Dean already didn't seem to care for me. I did three human years in Hell before I was pulled out," I pulled the sleeve of my shirt up and revealed the faint, pink handprints that went up my right arm. 

They were old scars now, but the one on my forearm and it's mirrored sibling on my bicep were reminders of Hell and the days following my revival. I could still vaguely remember the day Cael came for me. His dark skinned hand reaching towards me as I reached towards the bright light he'd brought with him. Unlike Cas had with Dean, Cael had grabbed me by my arm and yanked me free of the chains. I don't remember it hurting, but I imagined it must have.

"When I got pulled out I didn't think it was fair, so I called up Crowley and told him to take me back. He was taken aback by someone, especially a Winchester, doing such a thing. So he let me keep my soul, on one condition. He gave me a limited number of deaths, and once the last one is used up, I have to take up a position in Hell."

"How many lives do you have?" Elly asked, hesitantly.

"Twenty-five." I sighed, closing my eyes.

"How many times have you died…" I could tell she was trying to remember how many times I'd been in her head.

"Twenty-three," I answered.

"So…" She was figuring it out, "If you die another two times…then you'll be dead dead? Even if I return to my world?"

"Yes. I'll be a demon for good." I nodded.

"What about the angel that brought you back? Can't they just bring you out again?" That was another hard question.

I sighed, "He abandoned me. I've tried to reach out multiple times, especially after the fall. He never answers. He wasn't even around to answer questions as Cas did for Dean."

"Oh, ok…" She leaned back against the car again, "How did you meet Ketch?" Elly asked after a minute.

I laughed, "You want to know that story? It's not an exciting one."

"Yes! I wanna know the secrets!" She sounded like a kid.

"Fine," I chuckled, "But you asked for it."

I watched as she settled down closer to me, happily staring up at the stars as I began explaining how I'd met the killer Brit.

"I was Twenty-two the first time. It was my birthday and I had a month left to live. I'd left the boys on a hunting trip and disappeared to New York. Changed my phone number, name, look, and car. Everything so they couldn't track me. It was an easier goodbye in my eyes." I winced, "Of course now I know how much it hurt them. But this isn't about that. This is about the night I saw the young bastard across the bar."

"Ooh," Elly said.

I laughed, "I was having a blast, drinking, dancing. It was going to be a party until the end. And when I saw him I knew he would only make it better. Back then he was in the States on a scouting mission. Looking for intel on the hunters in the States, not here to kill monsters yet. And he was gorgeous." It was easy to reminisce on the night, it was a memory that still played in my mind often, "His hair was cut short, a little longer than a high and tight. Wearing a nice suit, his style never changed. And he had his nose stuck in a file. I remember walking over without a single thought of potential danger. Stole his glass of whiskey right out of his hands and locked eyes with those silver pools as I drank the rest of it." I looked down at Elly, she was staring up at me, once again fully invested, "I asked him if he wanted another round and it was enough for him to set the file down and hold an actual conversation with me. You can guess where the night went after that."

"He fucked your brains out?" She asked, a smile wide on her face. 

"It was wonderful." I sighed, remembering the clean hotel room he'd taken me to, the hot bodies smashing together, the alcohol-fueled rounds, "I decided to stay after that. I could help him with his intel anyway. And he made me feel useful in my last days." My smile fell. "But in the last few days, I decided I couldn't just die in front of him. So I left again, on the last day. No note, no goodbye, nothing. I went and found an abandoned building and waited for the hounds to come."

"Did you love him then?" Elly asked softly.

"I don't know." I was honest. Now I knew what my feelings were, but back then? I only used him for a good time before I died. "But I know he held feelings for me. He held it over me the next time we met after the campaign to join the BMOL started."

"Doesn't seem like he hates you now." Elly tucked her head into my chest.

"No, we've grown past it." I stared at the stars.

"Do you have any other family?" Strike three for hard questions.

"I did. I had my dad." I watched a helicopter's blinking lights float across the sky.

"You mean John?" Elly questioned.

"No," I scowled. "Mary lied about never hunting again after she met John. She would go out every so often on 'business trips'. John believed her. When she met my dad she was on one of these trips hunting a group of vampires in the area. They hit it off and little ol' me happened. 'Cept she didn't know until she was already home with little Dean and John again. When she did find out she left them on another trip and came back to my dad with some sob story. I don't know what she told John for him to be accepting of her being away from them for another six months but my dad says she didn't leave his side until I was born." I huffed, "She only stuck around for another month after that. Made sure I was alive and Dad could take care of me, then disappeared into the wind. I didn't even know she was dead until we caught up with the boys again."

"Is he gone?" Elly asked.

I coughed, covering up the tears that were coming up my throat, "Ya. That was my fault. I was out on a hunt with Dean and John. Taking out a werewolf gang. We thought we'd gotten them all. After the hunt John yelled at me, belittling my job at hunting. So I yelled back, told him to fuck off, and left. I went home to my dad. The biggest mistake I could've made." The tears were flowing now. I couldn't stop them. I wiped my cheek and sniffled. "A uh…a wolf followed me. One we'd missed. He waited until I left again, and then got his revenge. By the time I got back and took care of him, my dad was dead."

Elly put her hand on my chest, "I'm so sorry."

I smiled lightly at her, "It's ok. It was a long time ago. 'Bout time I talked about it."

"You've never…?" She asked.

"No, the boys think he died of natural causes. They have no idea it was my fault." I sniffled again, my eyes slowly drying.

She settled back against my chest again, "Will you ever tell them?"

I shrugged, "They don't need to know."

"He sounds like a good dad," Elly said quietly.

I smiled, "Thank you. I thought so too."