Chapter 11

I'd cleaned myself up by the time Elly had come back to the room. The cold water had helped me sober up a little too and I was able to sit at my laptop and pay attention to the research. Although now I was more wanting to just get some sleep rather than stare at the screen. A light depression had set over me now and I could feel it tugging at my bones.

"I got some more towels," Elly said as she entered the room. "Do we still need to.."

"I took care of it," I replied softly.

"Oh," She said, a small smile on her face. "I'll put these away then. Did you find anything new?"

"Not really," I said as she walked to the bathroom, fresh white towels in her hands. "There was a young girl in her twenties or thirties who worked as a prostitute. She was murdered while on the job one night on the third floor. No one ever saw her attacker and they never convicted anyone. So now her spirit sits on the third floor and kills these men after they pay for a night with her. It's pretty cut and dry."

Elly wandered back into the room and sat on the edge of her bed, "Why is she called the blue handkerchief ghost then?"

"She was found with one over her face," I answered, getting up from my chair and going to sit beside her. "This case sounds pretty textbook. We'll look for her grave in the morning, salt and burn tomorrow evening. No fuss." I laid back, "We probably don't even need to go to the hotel. But we should stick around for at least another day to make sure we did the job."

"That's boring," Elly pouted.

"Not every hunt is exciting, Elly." I smiled, "Some are simple. We couldn't be luckier for your first hunt."

"I know," She sighed, "I was just hoping to learn something."

"You will be learning." I said, "We'll still take care of the problem. You'll still see how to.."

"I need to learn, Alex." She fell back beside me and stared at the ceiling.

I looked over at her, but she kept her gaze focused upward. "Why do you 'need' to?" I looked back towards the ceiling, "I would much prefer you didn't. You'd be safer that way."

"The more I know the safer I will be." She stated.

"Elly…"

She laughed nervously, "I'm not going to just go out and look for hunts. But I can't shoot a gun, I can't use a knife without hurting myself and I barely know how to tie knots. I need to know some of those things. My life here depends on it. What if I end up on my own?"

She was right. Of course, she was. I wasn't ready to openly admit it but she was right. And I was the reason she needed to know those things. Her life being stuck to mine was the reason why she was a target in the first place. And for the rest of her life, we had to deal with that. I still wanted to do everything I could to keep her safe, but I needed to teach her those things too. But I also knew as soon as I did, she would end up dead. They all ended up dead after they learned how to hunt. It was just written that way. A double-edged blade. I knew she wouldn't be safer just by ignoring her and keeping her in the bunker. As much as ignorance was bliss, it was also the way people most often found themselves the subject of a monster killing. Her connection to me meant she needed to learn. So she would. That was the only answer.

"Alex?" Elly asked, her voice breaking through my thoughts. "Please teach me something. I want to be able to protect myself."

I sighed and opened my mouth the respond, but she continued before I could.

"I don't know how long I'll be here. This world is so different from mine. Everything looks the same, but the average Joe next door could be a killing monster in disguise. I feel like a sitting duck. I'd never be able to leave the bunker."

"I know.." I admitted.

She turned to look at me, "I would go crazy there. I was already starting to lose it before we left. I had explored the entire building. I felt like I'd read everything that wasn't in Latin or Enochian. Do you know how many big, old, boring books there are? A lot! And as cute as Dean and Cas are, their eye sex does get annoying."

I chuckled, "They're cute, aren't they?"

Elly just nodded, "If Dean would just man up and admit it already.."

"I don't think it's because he's ashamed," I said with a sigh, "I don't think he's embarrassed either, or at least that's not his whole reason."

"Why won't he admit it then?" Elly asked, her hand reaching down and taking mine.

"I think, he thinks if he admits it, then it becomes real. Cas becomes someone he can lose. Someone the enemy can hold against him. Cas becomes a liability."

"Is that why you ran away from Ketch?" She knew how to ask hard questions.

I looked at the ceiling quickly to avoid her gaze, "I don't know." I whispered.

"You ready for bed?" She asked, moving away from the topic, "Or do you wanna watch a movie?"

I shrugged, "I never really have time to watch movies. What's good?"

"Go get ready for bed and I'll pick something from the TV-guide." She said.

I sat up and slid off the bed, slipping my shirt off as I walked ot my bag. A pillow slapped against my back.

"You have no shame, you sexy sonofabitch." Elly laughed. I smiled at her as she moved to her pack and pulled out a pair of sweatpants and a shirt to change into. She walked into the bathroom. "We don't have to watch anything if you don't want to."

"First, I have shame, I'm just comfortable around you." I said, shrugging into a loose t-shirt, "Second, a movie does sound nice. I'm not tired yet so I don't mind staying up."

"Is there anything you want to watch?" She asked, walking back into the main room.

"Not really," I shrugged, "But you can grab my laptop, Sam figured out how to hack the Netflix servers so we can watch whatever is on there."

"Deal!" She walked swiftly towards the table and grabbed the computer, "Do we have any snack foods left?"

"Jerky I think." I settled onto the edge of a bed, "There might be a vending machine we can hit up if you want something else."

"That's fine," Elly was smiling again as she came to settle on the bed. She rested the laptop to the side and stretched her arms out to me. "Come here."

I scooted up the bed and leaned up against the pillows next to her. She rested the laptop between us with a smile and looked through our options. I laid my head on her shoulder as she scrolled. It was an odd feeling, feeling safe here. Here with her next to me in the dingey motel room. The nearest gun on sat on the bedside table on the other side of the room, and for once I was okay with that. 

I took a deep breath, and the scent of her skin carried into my nose. She smelled like vanilla and violets. It was a warm, comforting scent that made me relax more. I could feel the sleep beginning to pull at my bones. I had never felt this tired before. Or it was more likely I had never let myself relax this much before. I always had to be on guard. Always ready for the next monster. Even at home, even in Ketch' arms, I had never relaxed this much. I could feel the warmth of her body as it seeped into mine, combining with the softness of the pillows to pull me into the haze. My eyelids grew heavy as the open credits of a movie started playing.

I inhaled deeply as warm sunlight pulled me from my deep sleep. I blinked slowly before sitting up and taking in the room around me. The small laptop was still on the bed, but had been pushed to the edge. I reached forward to pull it closer, but stopped when I felt the weight against my side. I glanced to my side and caught the beautiful blonde of Elly's hair in my vision. She'd tucked her head now against my side. She was still sleeping soundly. I closed my eyes again and leaned back against the pillows, enjoying the feeling of the warmth of the sun and Elly's body.

"I see you're enjoying yourself, mouse." A voice I knew all too well brought me back to reality.

The floating feeling of warm bliss left and I sunk like a rock back into the cold truth of this world. I sighed softly and opened my eyes again, this time focusing on the demon at the end of the bed. A dangerous smile danced in his eyes.

"I'm on a hunt, Crowley," I spoke softly, hoping to keep Elly asleep.

"And that is absolutely what it looks like." Crowley tutted at me.

"What are you doing here?" I looked the demon over, he was as clean as always, "I thought you were working with Cas to find 'he-who-shall-not-be-named'." I hissed the last part.

"Feathers gets a bit annoying." Crowley stepped around the end of the bed and came to my side, meticulously picking where to put his feet, "I came to warn you about something."

"Like what?" I always had to press for information with him. Regardless if I was his 'favorite' or not.

"Asmodeus is looking for her," He gestured to Elly.

"I'm aware. That's why she's here with me." I felt Elly shift slightly and I froze. I watched her for a second, making sure her breathing returned to its slow and steady pace before continuing with Crowley, "But you wouldn't be here if that was all. What's wrong?"

"He knows you're here." He smiled.

"How?" I tried to keep the sudden fear out of my voice.

The demon shrugged. "Cas was just relaying news he'd heard from Gabrielle, and I'm his messenger boy to you." Crowley straightened his tie, "But I would suggest leaving this town as soon as you can. The sooner the better actually."

"How much sooner is 'sooner'" I asked, using my free hand to rub my eyes. I was still so tired. I could use another year or two of sleep as I'd just gotten.

"Don't push your luck, mouse."

I opened my eyes again and he was gone, the room now empty. I groaned, startling Elly.

"Wah's wrong?" She asked groggily. I almost laughed at the sight of her. Her hair stuck up in every direction and there was a thin line of dried drool on her cheek. She yawned and tried her question again. "What's wrong?"

"I got a rude wake-up call." I frowned, "I'm sorry Elly but we need to leave. We gotta go salt and burn those bones this morning, can't stay another night."

"Oh. Ok." I could see the sadness on her face, "Did you make up with Ketch?"

"Ya," I nodded slowly, hoping she'd convince herself of the lie she'd just fed me.

"Oh good! I'll get dressed and we can head out." And it was like I'd never mentioned cutting the hunt short. Her smile was bright and reflected in her eyes. "I'm excited."

"Fix your hair too," I called after her as she slid out of bed, "Don't be too long. We gotta do this sooner rather than later."

"One night without the British dick that hard?" She teased from the bathroom. "Oh my god, I look like a mountain troll…"

I snickered to myself. "I can survive a night without him," I commented, getting up from the bed and beginning to gather our things. I ran a hand through my hair, fixing my short hair into its usual messy look. I ruffled through my pack, fitting things into place, "But I did hear from Dean. He needs me for another hunt and he's asked us to come back asap." Another white lie wouldn't hurt her.

I heard her muffled sound of approval as I walked over to the nightstand and grabbed my phone from it, Elly must have plugged it in before she went to bed. She was thoughtful that way. I turned it on and went through the messages as I waited for her. I did have a handful of texts from Dean, one or two from Sam about a case he was on, one from Cas about Crowley, and at least a dozen from Ketch. I sighed and started to go through them.

I can't believe you ran out like that! I said something I truly meant from the bottom of my heart and you leave?!

Shock.

I don't believe you didn't hear me. And I refuse to think you don't feel the same. Have fun with your silly little hunt and I'll have some words for you when you're done gallivanting around with that Elizabeth.

Denial.

I can't fucking believe you're ignoring my calls! How dare you! 

Anger.

Please Love, You have no idea what pain I'm in.

Bargaining.

If you wish to be left alone, then I understand. I get that no one would want to be in love with a man like myself. Let alone hear those words from one.

Depression.

I'll be waiting for you when you get back. If you decide to come back that is. I'll wait for whatever your answer may be.

Acceptance.

Most of the text from him followed that pattern of the message. It was like reading the thoughts of someone going through the stages of grief. I sighed again and slipped my phone into my pocket. I stood as I heard Elly re-enter the room.

"You ok?" She asked, rocking back and forth on her heels, "Can we grab breakfast?"

"I'm fine," I said, giving her a small smile. "Breakfast sounds amazing. There's a cafe just around the corner. I saw it when we drove in." I grabbed my gun and slipped it into my waistband.

"Do I get one of those?" Elly asked.

"Nope." I said, "But you can have this," I said, reaching into my pack and pulling out a switchblade, "Just don't cut yourself." I made sure the latch was closed before handing it to her.

"My dad let me use one once." She looked at it with a smile, "I made a super pointy stick and stabbed him with it by accident. I promise not to make any of those."

"I think I'm going to keep you away from as many sticks as possible, just in case." I teased, pushing the door open and walking outside into the cool morning air.

It took us about an hour to get to the graveyard. I'd wanted to spoil Elly with a nice breakfast before her first official hunt. So we'd had the tradition I was used to, diner-style bacon, eggs, and toast. It wasn't always the best of breakfasts, but it was something I'd shared special with Dean and Sam on more than one occasion. It was something normal we could always return to. Normal and safe. After we'd eaten, we found the burial site for one Caroline Griffin, the only woman we could pinpoint the most evidence of being the Blue Handkerchief ghost on. There was so little information on Caroline that it was hard to find anything related to her death. Elly had finally managed to find a local graveyard that claimed to hold her. We were about to find out how true that was.

"We'll have to wait until after dusk to start digging," I hated waiting here any longer than we had to. I felt like it left Elly in greater danger, but I wanted her to have the experience. It would be something for her to brag about with the boys. "Let's go find her."

"Will we leave after that?" Elly asked, carefully stepping behind me as I walked through the graves. "Is that why we packed the car?"

"Ya," I nodded, paying close attention to names, "I'd rather leave ASAP, but this is important."

She nodded, "Don't we have to stay to make sure she stops killing?" She stepped around another headstone, arms out like she needed the extra balance. She looked like a kid pretending to be an airplane. "That's what you said we needed to do last night."

"If this was a perfect case, ya. We'd stay." I pushed a bush away from a headstone to get a better look. "But Dean never calls me about a hunt, so when he does it's pretty serious." I hated to weave more lies with her, but if it kept her safer longer…"Plus it sounds like she's only killing men who kinda deserve it, so a few more probably won't hurt."

She continued to walk around graves in her childish way, it made me smile. "What did he want anyway?" She stopped under a small tree, reaching up for a branch above her head and pulling herself up into it, "He's not getting his jacket back. It's mine now." She smiled down at me, "It's kinda calm here huh? Almost don't want to go back home."

"It doesn't stay that way for long, trust me." I said, walking closer to her dangling feet, "Let's head back for now. I think this," I carefully kicked a headstone under the tree, "Is our girl. We can explore a little more if you want. Maybe get some more information on her."

Before the words had fully left my mouth, several beings surrounded us. Five surrounded me on the ground, and a sixth appeared next to Elly in the tree. Their coal-black eyes let me know they were demons. I reached for Elly, knowing the ammo in my gun would only slow them down.

"Elly!" I yelled.

"Alex!" She screamed, reaching for me before disappearing with the demons.

"Fuck!" I yelled, turning to face the next demon closest to me, but they were all gone. And they'd taken Elly with them.

I threw more curses under my breath, some of them in English, others in Enochian, some that would make Chuck blush. I ripped my phone from my pocket and speed-dialed Dean. I started a fast pace back towards my car as it rang.

"Alex?" Dean said, voice groggy with sleep.

"They have Elly," I grumbled.

"What? Who?" He was awake now, he could probably hear the urgency in my voice. "Cas, get up."

I'd loved to have commented on the angel being in my brother's bed, but there were other, more important matters at hand.

"Demons. They showed up out of nowhere Dean." I tried to slow my breathing, and tried controlling my anger. I wanted to tear into something, anything. "I promised I would protect her Dean…" The tears were hot in my eyes. 

"Alex, come home," Dean said. "I'll have Cas start searching. I'll try to get a hold of Crowley."

"I want her back alive, Dean," I said, my hands shaking.

"Get home, Alex." His voice was steady, calming. It pulled me out of the darkness a little. "We'll figure it out when you get here."

I hung up, not bothering to reply any further. Dean would understand what I meant. He wouldn't be offended or upset that I dropped the call. He knew I was too much like him to care.

The rest of the short walk through the graveyard was a blur, I didn't even realize it was raining. My mind raced with horrible thoughts of what could be happening to her. And it was my fault. I had brought her here. Before I knew it I was speeding down the road again, and Cas was appearing in my passenger seat.

"You drive like Dean." His low voice said, "You should be more careful."

"Not in the mood raven," I grumbled, "Say 'Nevermore' and leave me be."

"Do you know where they took her?" Cas continued, not acknowledging my statement.

"We were in the graveyard, Cas." I took a deep shaking breath. "There were six of them at least, there and gone before I could react."

"Did you recognize any of them?" Cas questioned further, "Any name would be…"

"No Cas!" I yelled at the angel, "I didn't know who they were, I barely got a second look at them. I should have listened to Crowley. We should have left."

"Crowley knew?" Cas sounded surprised for once.

"What?" I asked, pulled from one thought to another faster than I could process. "Yes, he knew. Came and warned us that they knew where we were. I should have just…" I glanced over to the passenger seat, it was empty again. "Bird brain," I hissed, pushing my foot harder against the gas.

All I could do at this point was go home. Once I was there we could figure everything else out. It would always be safe in the bunker. In the bunker the outside world couldn't hurt you, you could spend days figuring out a problem and never worry about it coming to haunt you. That was where I needed to be but until then…I needed another plan.

"Cael," A name I hadn't spoken in years left my mouth, "You better be fucking listening." I took a deep breath and continued, "You're going to help me here and now and make up for all the fucking times you've abandoned me. If you don't, I swear I will make it my end goal to make sure I will be the only thing to end you. I won't need an angel's blade to do it either."

I didn't stop to think if he'd bothered to listen to me. I never really felt like he did. He'd never bothered to help me with anything unless my life was in danger. And even then he'd rather let me die than come raise me from Hell again. 

"You're going to protect her. Do you hear me?" I said through clenched teeth, "You are going to protect Elly with every feather in your fucking body. If anything happens to her, even the smallest scratch…"

I broke off, biting my tongue to keep the tears from flowing freely. I was so stupid. SO very fucking stupid. I should have left when Crowley told me to. I should have packed the car right away and carried her sleeping body to it. I shouldn't have lied to her, she would've understood. If only I could…

I stopped thinking about it, I took a deep breath and focused on the road again. I flew around a corner, my car squealing in protest. When I was on all four wheels again I noticed another person sitting in my passenger seat, one I barely knew the face of.

Cael was an anomaly to look at. He always sat abnormally straight, his tall, dark frame refusing to slouch even though his head brushed the ceiling of my car. He had an athletic build, something close to an Olympic swimmer. He had short blonde hair and bright blue eyes. It was like he had chosen this vessel purely for its ability to simultaneously blend in and stand out the most. His clothing was casual, a t-shirt and jeans, almost like he'd been out with friends. The look he stared at me with wasn't a pleasant one.

"I've told you not to call me." His voice was deep, almost menacing. The opposite of what you'd think an angel would sound like. 

"You're the one who decided to show up." I jabbed, not in the mood for his shit.

"I only 'showed up' because you sounded like you needed more help than Castiel could ever give you." He sneered at his little joke.

"Cas is an amazing angel," I swerved through a traffic light, nearly causing an accident. "He at least bothers to show up in my times of trouble. But you're faster."

"Just admit I'm better than him." Cael crossed his lanky arms over his chest.

"You're a douche," I growled.

"I could just leave." It was more than a threat, I knew if he wanted to he would and never come to my aid again. I'd lose the small amount of hope I had.

I slammed the brakes, sending my car into a tailspin sliding across the wet road and smacking into the curb. I was just far enough off the road to avoid getting hit by another car as it passed by.

"Please…don't leave me again," I mumbled, the fight leaving me again.

"Why shouldn't I? You've been nothing but mean to me since I showed up." He huffed and turned away from me to look out the window.

"Please Cael. I need you to save her. She means the world to me…" I was begging an angel for help. That hadn't happened since Lucifer had been freed.

"Why would I do that for you? I've done my one job, and you've been ungrateful ever since. You even went back to that damn demon and made another deal with it!" He stared back at me, blue eyes piercing and cold.

"You wouldn't be here right now if you thought that." I sniffed, "You wouldn't have shown up in the first place.."

"I figured if I did, you'd finally stop calling me." He pointed at his head, "I can't just turn it off like I can the other angels, your voice is a priority in my head."

"Get out," I said, removing my seatbelt and getting out of my car.

He stared at me oddly for a few seconds, his head tilted to the side like a confused dog. But he did get out of my car, silently standing in the rain as he waited for me to do or say anything.

I walked around to him, "You know something Cael?" 

"I can't possibly know unless you tell me. I'm not a mind reader." Sometimes I hadn't the way angels took everything literally.

I yanked the sleeve of my shirt up, exposing my arm and his handprints. "Look. Regardless if you like it or not, this means we're connected." The rain pelted the old scars, beginning to soak me. "You don't have to be like Cas, but you are my guardian angel. So start fucking acting like one."

"I've told you before," He cared nothing for the rain, "My job was done a long time ago. Castiel took it upon himself to fall in love with his work. By the looks of him, I'm glad I dodged that bullet. Living with humans has made him soft." He folded his arms over his chest again, "Can't you just say thank you and be done with this?"

I stomped forward and struck him across the face, I didn't give him long enough to process the shock before speaking again, "Your job is to keep me alive for whatever Chuck's grand fucking plan is. He said that himself. The creator himself said that I am somehow important enough to save over and over again and that's part of your fucking job." I stood there, staring down the large angel knowing he had the power to take me out so easily, but knowing he wouldn't dare defy any orders given by God. "Get over yourself, Cael. Cas is a hell of an angel, and if anything, falling in love with my brother saved him from whatever it is Heaven seems to do to angels. He's not soft. He is stronger than you'll ever be." I took another step towards him, "I'm a Winchester, and like a bad cold, I'm not going away anytime soon. You can prance around and pretend you don't have some sort of feeling for me, but your standing here proves otherwise. If you don't start acting the part, I can personally promise you I will never leave you alone. And if you ditch me again, I will find you." I stuck a finger against his chest. "And I will kill you without a second thought."

His jaw tensed as his eyes looked over my face, water dripping out of his hair. I could see the argument in his mind turning his blue oceans into stormy seas. He didn't say a word, just stared into my eyes as if he were questioning the threat.

"You're going to get Elly back." I took a deep breath, letting my hand drop now, "But I need you to come back to the bunker with me first."

"Why exactly am I going with you?" He took a step back from me.

"Because I need assurance that you're not going to fly away again," I said, stepping back around my car.

"Your race is very ungrateful," He mumbled, ducking back into my car.

"Your race is just over-glorified birds." I threw back.

I wasn't surprised to see Dean waiting for us as we pulled into the bunker. 

"You took longer than I thought. I was starting to get worried." He started walking towards me but stopped as Cael stepped out of my car. "Who's your friend?"

"Dean, this is Cael. My guardian angel." I said, still a little agitated with him. I ran to Dean, and he caught me in a tight hug. "I couldn't save her, Dean."

"It'll be ok." He hushed softly, though I could tell a good part of his attention was still on Cael. "I promise we'll get her back. Let's go inside."

He pulled me with him, arm draped over my shoulder. I looked over my shoulder to make sure Cael was following. He was walking with his head up, looking at the wardings of the bunker that glowed as he passed them.

"Do you want me ot get you anything?" Dean asked as we walked into the map room. I fell into a seat and shook my head before lowering it into my hands. "Has Crowley gotten in touch?"

"I'd rather not talk to him at the moment," I mumbled, feeling the table move as Dean sat next to me. "Where's Sam?"

"He's out trying to find more information." I felt his hand softly on my back, rubbing it in a soothing motion, "I guess there have been quite a few demon sightings in the closest towns, that's what I originally texted you about. He went ot see what was up."

I looked up from my hands, "Is he going to be ok by himself?"

"He'll be fine." Dean smiled at me.

I laid my head on the table, closing my eyes. I almost wanted to go to sleep and wake up when everything was back to normal again. But I knew I couldn't do that, Elly would already be in trouble. They'd be torturing her already. I couldn't live with myself if I let that go on too long.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Dean asked softly.

"There's not much to report." I kept my eyes closed, "They appeared, grabbed her, and disappeared before I could even grab my gun."

"Did Cas find you?" He asked.

"For a few seconds, took off as soon as I mentioned Crowley." I sighed, "I'm scared, Dean."

"I know," He whispered.

"Where's Ketch?" I asked, sitting up again.

"I don't know." Dean shrugged, "He left a little bit after you did. Haven't seen him since. Not that you've been gone long."

"I need to talk to him. Can you call him for me?" I looked at my brother, smiling at the face he made.

"Fine," He grumbled, getting up from his chair, "I'll be back in a bit."

As soon as he left the room I turned to Cael. He'd been standing idly in the archway while Dean and I had talked. 

"I have some things for you to do," I said, my voice tired.

Cael rolled his eyes but didn't say anything.

"I want you to find her, OK? I don't care how or what you have to do, but you need to find her. And then I want you to protect her with everything you have. Think of her as an extension of my soul OK? She is that important to me." I took another deep breath, "Do not let them do anything to her. Please Cael."

He didn't say a word before disappearing from where he stood. I ran a hand through my hair, standing up from the table. I walked to where Dean had put an old stereo and turned it on. I pulled my phone from my pocket and plugged it into the aux cord. I pulled up my music playlist and hit shuffle. Soon the sounds of Lynyrd Skynrd filled the bunker. It wasn't long before Dean reentered the room, humming to the lyrics. I hadn't moved from my spot next to the machine, I was numb when Dean pulled me to him and started leading me around the room in a dance, Simple Man drifting around us.

"You can do this," Dean sang softly as we swayed to the music, "If you try."

I rested my head against his chest, letting his feet guide mine in this soft dance. Dean had never felt to make me feel better, although in this moment it still felt like something was missing. There was still something I needed before I could think about this situation without falling apart.

"Be a simple kind of man," Dean continued to sing softly. He placed a soft kiss on the top of my head.

"How did you get Cas to be so…..Cas." I asked softly.

"How did I make him into the badass that he is?" Dean said, chuckling softly.

"Ya…Cael hates me. But what's so different between him and Cas?" At this point I was letting my body do what it wanted, moving softly to the music because it knew how to, not because I was telling it to.

"Cas was like him at one point, you know that." He stopped moving and used a hand to pull my face up to look at him, "And you also know how much it took for him to see us the way he does. An angel needs ot see what humans are before they can appreciate us as beings and not objects."

"So you're saying Cael needs to experience why he's meant to be my guardian?" I had always been jealous of my brothers' candy apple green eyes, they were so much more than the brown of mine.

"More or less." He shrugged, "And if he doesn't then we can always kill him." He made a stabbing motion with his free hand, making me laugh. It wasn't a true laugh, but it was a start.

"Did you call…" As if on cue, my phone rang, cutting off the music, "Never mind."

"You should answer that. Who knows what the psycho would do if you kept ignoring him." Dean winked at me before giving me a final hug, "Don't think I don't know." He whispered before letting go and walking off.

I sighed, reality slowly sinking in again. I walked back over the to stereo and unplugged my phone before answering it.

"Hello…" I asked, sinking back against the wall.

"Are you at the bunker?" Ketch asked from the other side. "I'll be there soon."

"I'm so sorry I…" I started.

"We can discuss that later." He interrupted me.

"Ok," I whispered, the tears threatening to fall again.

"Alex?" Dean called, leaning back into the room, "Did he say something?"

I shook my head, giving Dean a weak smile as I hung up the call. I ran a shaking hand through my hair again, "I'll be right back." I said, heading for the garage.

"Alex," I turned back to look at Dean, "Call me if you need anything, OK?"

"Thank you, Dean." I smiled at him before continuing to the garage.

I pushed the door closed as the motorcycle pulled into the garage. I watched Ketch stop in the middle and pull the helmet from his head. I cautiously stepped closer to him until I was next to the bike, the warmth of the engine still radiating from it. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but nothing came and I dropped my head.

"I'm sorry, Alex." His voice was soft and gentle. "If I could have been there…"

I shook my head, still unable to look at him.

"Dean explained what was going on. Can I help in any way?" He was so caring.

My hand went to my mouth, trying to cover a sob that was going to escape, but the tears fell to the concrete anyway. I clenched my teeth, attempting to not make another sound, but the next inhale was sharp and then I couldn't stop myself from falling into him.

"I couldn't do anything…" I said through the sobs, "They…they took her right in front of me. I don't know….I don't know what to do." I couldn't form a coherent thought anymore, "I need to find her, I need to help her….I need…"

Before I could say anymore, He stood and pulled me into him. He was warm and the smell of rain drifted off to mingle with the smell of leather and gunpowder. It was so comforting. That missing piece I hadn't felt earlier with Dean, suddenly found. I let the emotions go, letting myself cry full and ugly now, clinging to him like a small child would cling to a stuffed animal. I was glad he was letting me cry like this without saying anything. Just silent warmth. 

When I felt like I could breathe again without starting to sob again, I pushed away from him and looked up into his soft grey eyes. There was such a soft smile on his face, and his eyes held genuine concern and love. I could get lost here. I stretched up and placed a small kiss on his lips.

"I love you too."