Chapter Twenty-Two

Entry:

Everything was going, until a girl caught me in the hallway. Sorry, look how cute my newborn is, look how he smiles-

I left. There was tingling in my hands, short loud gasps of breath. Tears. I just thought… I have to get out of here! 

I am a trained soldier, I have no reason to cower at a mere conversation. I fear this may have something to do about my increasingly isolating myself. I feel gross, I must bathe. 

Scrub, scrub, scrub until I bleed. Yes, I like to bleed. 

Phoenix.

--

Phoenix awoke in an unfamiliar space of blinding brightness. Count. One, her body tucked in a small, stiff bed. Two, the blue orchid on the nightstand giving view to a room the size of their old house. Three, the soft hum filling her ears. She looked across from her, where four people huddled amongst one another stood. 

Who were they? One of them turned and noticed she had awoken. Phoenix's crusty eyes blinked into focus until the figures were clear. Before her stood Greyson, Cole, Daisy, and a woman uniformed as a doctor. 

"You're awake," Cole said.

He sounded happy, as though her waking up wasn't a guarantee.

"Where am I?" Phoenix asked, sitting up and placing a hand to her head. Her voice was rough like sand. 

"You need to rest," Cole insisted, closing the distance between them and placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm fine. Tell me everything," Phoenix shrugged him off. 

"No. You need to focus on recovering. Know that everyone is safe, and we'll tell you everything after you've rested," Greyson declared. 

"Greyson, we have plans! We can't be set back-" Phoenix cut herself off when she glanced at the doctor, who observed her closely pen and paper in hand.

"That's being called off," Greyson said with a vindication Phoenix had never heard from him before.

"But don't you understand?" Phoenix asked, her tone raising as her head spun. "It's personal now. Those intruders came after our family. We must fight back and create a safe environment. That way, we can have a secure future."

Cole and Daisy averted their eyes from her. After giving the plan to steal the Burning Stone more thought, it seemed they no longer supported her idea. Or maybe they merely followed Greyson now. 

"The royal family ruled it another assassination attempt," Greyson said. "That kitchen was always empty before you moved in, it would have been an easy way to get into the castle. The Queen was in her drawing room, only a couple of rooms away. There are always guards at her windows, so they couldn't have gotten in that way. And before you think about it, the royal family has already sent out people to identify the man left behind, so there's no reason for you to do anything but rest. Leave it alone."

"Greyson, how can you say that? The fact is, intentional or not, they came after us!"

Greyson crossed his arms over his chest. "You're too emotional right now. Take the next week to think this through. Until then, you'll recover from your injuries and keep yourself out of harm's way." 

Then he turned to leave, just like that. How could he be so cruel, so cold? No, he was just trying to protect Phoenix. He cared for her, remember, they cared for each other. 

"Wait!" Phoenix screamed at the group leaving her side. They all stopped and faced her. 

"That man, under the clock..." she whispered, "is he...?"

Her family shifted uncomfortably. Distantly Phoenix heard a strong wind pounding on the windowsill, could see red from the sun setting and spilling on the floor, could feel an incomparable warmth radiating from the fluffy blanket surrounding her body. Their hesitation was telling. 

It was Cole who had the courage to tell her, "I owe you a life debt. Never regret killing that man, if it wasn't him then it would have been you." He walked over to Phoenix, shoes scraping the wooden floor, and sat beside her body. Then, delicately placing his hands on her cheeks, he placed a kiss on her forehead. Phoenix's body went dead still. "Bird, thank you." 

He slid his hand over hers. "When I went back to check on Greyson, this was in the dead man's pocket."

Phoenix felt a small journal placed in the palm of her hands.

"We'll be okay," Cole whispered.

"We'll always be okay," Phoenix responded.

"Cole!" Greyson called. "Let's go."

Cole jumped out of his spot and caught up to the others as they left the room, their voices carried away with them. All Phoenix heard was incoherent static. Cole had never shown so much affection to her, but why did it feel so sad?

Phoenix untucked herself from bed, slowly easing her feet onto the cold floor. A white gown ordained her body, a body without a speck of dirt on it. Phoenix stared at her hands, not a single thing under her fingernails. Even still, when she rubbed them together, she could feel how dirty she was. Scrub, scrub, scrub.

After a minute victim to a headrush, Phoenix stood and went to the door. Wait, no, no, no! They locked it? Those idiots! No- Cole was right here, he said they would be okay, he said-

"Together!" Phoenix shouted. "You forgot to say together! We'll be okay together-" 

Images from the scene flooded Phoenix's vision. She was never hurt during the battle, so her fatigue and light-headedness must have been psychological. Her breath left shaky, and she willed her legs to stop their trembling. Her body refused to acknowledge her mind. 

Maybe the windows?

She stumbled weakly to the windows. Her room was so much higher than the Throne Room. Was she in one of the towers? Was she really so reckless, had she really made them worry so much, that they needed to lock her up for the duration of her recovery?

Phoenix would have to spend a week in this cage. And Greyson thought this would make her give up on her mission? No.

Now, Phoenix was convinced. 

If she didn't get that Burning Stone, then her family would continue to be in peril. Those attackers who tried to assassinate the Queen didn't know that Phoenix had moved into the castle and resided in that kitchen, which meant that they didn't know she was investigating the Burning Stone. With thoughts of uncertainty laced with venomous fury, Phoenix realized she was alone.

Alone after murdering a man. 

All thoughts and sounds went still, and she slid to the wooden floor and sobbed, her own cries blocked by her hands over her ears.

#

"Don't you think this is a little much?" Cole asked Greyson as soon as they left the room.

"Do you have any better ideas on how to make stay put and actually relax enough to think clearly? And what did you whisper to her?" Greyson didn't think he was doing too much- he was only doing what was necessary for Phoenix's health. 

Daisy, Greyson, and Cole all stood outside her door. The doctor continued down the hall alone. They waited until she was out of earshot before speaking again. Up here in the tower, no could hear them, nor could they hear inside Phoenix's room.

"I don't think her idea is horrible," Daisy admitted, her arms crossing over her chest.

Cole stood by Daisy and gave a nod. "I agree. Those royals shouldn't have any more power."

"So you want to do a suicide mission?" Greyson asked.

"We don't even have a plan yet," Daisy assured, "this is just an idea. Once we have back-up plans and escape routes, you'll feel better about the whole concept."

Greyson considered this for a moment, the idea of flushing out and executing Phoenix's theft idea. 

"Fine," Greyson conceded. "I'll keep my mind open. But in exchange, Bird stays in there to recover. No one visits her, you guys will just give each other ideas. Let her think things out on her own and recover without worrying about some plan."

Cole's eyes flashed to Greyson's and Greyson knew- Cole was furious. But he reluctantly agreed. He must have seen how set Greyson was on his plan. The three made their way back down a long staircase of spiraling brick. Down, down, down, to the main floor. Once they were in the hall, Cole caught Daisy's arm. 

She turned and looked at him. "What?"

"I'll see you later tonight before you go to bed. I want to talk with Greyson, so go ahead without us," Cole said.

Daisy gave a smile and a nod, then made her way back to her room.

"What is it?" Greyson asked Cole. 

"Follow me." 

The sincerity in Cole's voice compelled Greyson to listen. On the way, they passed the ruined kitchen the family was eating at, and a pristine drawing room nearby. It was a horrible thought, but Greyson knew that if the family weren't there, the Queen could be dead. 

"Why weren't we eating in the dining room?" Greyson asked. 

"Bird thought it was too formal, didn't like how far apart and fragile all the sitting placements were."

Greyson smiled at the thought of Phoenix rejecting a nice dining room for a worn-in kitchen the family could be comfortable in. They took a right and approached Cole's door. It was right across from Daisy's, so he didn't understand why they couldn't walk with her. Did Cole not want her seeing them enter his room together?

Cole opened the heavy, black door and locked them both inside. The room stretched as wide as it did far, a bigger room than any one person needed. In the center sat a double bed draped in white sheets and an excess number of pillows, with a single bookshelf by the door and a desk on the right. Both had flowers growing in pots resting on the surface, one being the same type of flower Cole had left for Bird. A window pouring in the sunset lit the room aflame. 

"This is amazing," Greyson commented, stepping towards the clean glass. 

"Yes," Cole distantly remarked. He sat down by the edge of the bed. 

Greyson made his way and sat beside Cole, studying Cole's wrinkled brow and pursed lips. Paused. Greyson cleared his throat and any wandering thoughts in his mind. "What did you have to say?"

Cole took a deep breath and faced Greyson. "There's no point in locking her up, she's always been like this."

Greyson blinked for a second. "Been like what?"

"When our mother died, Phoenix didn't decide to live a quiet life or keep a low profile. She chose to go out and continue working, she went out and found danger. She doesn't do it on purpose," Cole stopped for a second and a small smile spread, "at least, most of the time she doesn't do it on purpose. But she won't run from these issues, issues like stealing the Burning Stone or fighting in a dangerous Tournament. She's going to fight back. No time in any cage will change that." 

Greyson believed every word Cole said. "So, you don't think there's any way to talk her out of this plan?"

Cole shook his head. "Stealing the Burning Stone isn't a terrible idea, and she seems pretty set on it. We should support her, make sure that it's fool-proof, and give her all our confidence. I…" Greyson followed the dip of Cole's Adam's apple as he swallowed, "I trust her." 

Greyson smiled. He couldn't imagine feeling something so strong for his family. "Do you miss her?"

Cole's eyebrows scrunched. "Who?"

"Your mother."

"All the time," Cole admitted, his gaze dropping to the floor. Greyson wondered why they hadn't talked about this before. "It's funny, Phoenix takes after our mom more than she'll ever admit. I think their similarities angers me a bit. No, I can't keep pretending," Cole raked his fingers through his hair. "It scares me. I'm scared Phoenix will end up with the same fate as mom."

Greyson saw the way Cole was unable to meet his eyes, unable to stop his fidgeting. "My mother gave me up to the military, I don't have anyone I miss. Nor miss me," Greyson said. Cole finally met Greyson's eyes. Blue, dark like the rough sea, and Greyson knew Cole was really listening. "So when I hear you talk about you or her talk about your family, ready to do anything for each other, I get a bit jealous."

Cole smiled ever so slightly. "No one's ever gotten jealous of me."

"You two just haven't met enough people," Greyson joked lightly. 

Cole nodded, causing his smooth locks to tickle his brow. He cocked his head to the side, tapped his fingers against his thighs, then nodded to himself. "Can I show you something?" 

"Please do," Greyson said. 

Cole reached out his palm and, unsure of what to do, Greyson weaved their hands together. Cole held Greyson's hand in a similar way Phoenix did.

"The family likes to feel a pulse when we hold hands," Cole explained. "Lucas counts the beats until he sleeps, Daisy usually presses too hard to see your reaction."

"And Phoenix?" Greyson asked. "She counts to make herself less anxious, right?"

Cole frowned. "Guess you already know that one."

"And you?" Greyson said. "What do you do?"

"You can find that out right now."

Cole's thumb tapped Greyson's wrist one, two, three times, and pressed a second longer on the last tap. 

"What does that mean?" Greyson asked.

Cole smiled. "It means I trust you when you say Phoenix will be better after a week of healing." 

With that, Cole released their hands, walking toward the exit, as though nothing happened. Greyson jumped up and followed suit. Door held open, Greyson took his queue to leave, hesitating in the doorframe. Cole seemed eager to kick him out, and did Greyson do something wrong, look in the wrong direction, say the wrong thing? 

"Greyson," Cole called out.

Greyson turned and looked at Cole expectedly. Cole stood tall, hands behind his back and eyes pointed down. But he wasn't like Phoenix. It wasn't a glare forcing the other to be submissive, no, it was a glare protecting himself. Greyson suspected Cole was much more emotional than he let on. 

"You're one of us now," Cole said. "If you leave, seek comfort knowing there'll be four people missing you." 

Greyson's brain froze, stunned; his chest ran. He had never seen Cole act so openly soft, and it made him feel special. Cole made Greyson feel wanted, needed, even. Phoenix was right, Cole truly was kind to those he cared about.

"And you, Cole," Greyson replied, "know that I will protect you, so there will be no reason to miss you."

Cole smiled a little, more than enough for Greyson to know that Cole appreciated the remark. Giving a curt nod, Greyson turned and left Cole in his familiar room of blinding brightness.