CASSANDRA
"So, you still coming over tonight?" I stirred the spaghetti with my fork as I asked. Because of the food scarcity caused by the Decay, and the lack of options on meals, spaghetti has become an everyday food. I had no appetite for it. Looking up, I saw her hesitate. "Sarah?"
"S.. Sure," she forced a smile.
The cafeteria was noisy with many talking more than eating, plus the sound of footsteps and scrapping of plates on the plastic tables. It was quite lively. I bet everyone has spaghetti to deal with too, judging by their lack motivation. "You don't want to?"
I'd been friends with Sarah for.... well not for the longest time there's out there, but three years is enough for me to know what face my best friend subconsciously makes when she finds something troubling.
"No.... It's not that." She sighed, "I just totally forgot about it,"
I frowned. "You forgot about our girls night?"
"I thought it was tomorrow, okay?"
It pissed me off but I said nothing. Of course It didn't piss me off that she forgot about the sleepover per se, but more about the fact she had to hide the real reason she's hesitating in the first place. I don't buy shit about her forgetting___ Sarah don't forget. The fact that she'd rather keep a commitment with me even if it was inconvenient for her, than to reveal anything about herself is grating though. But typical Sarah I guess.
[God we were friends, but the girl would conceal even the most inconsequential things.]
I was surprised to find mom home when I returned from school. Cassandra Grey is a middle aged woman of average height. 5ft 5. But looked considerably younger as if she wasn't quite 30, even if she was almost a decade older than that. She always has an easy smile and a mischievous glint in her brown eyes. We looked alike at a glance. My mother's hair was brown and curly too, she was slender like me, and a little long of neck, also.
I found her in a business suit drinking wine in the kitchen, her heels kicked off at the door, so she'd only just returned. "How was school little one?" She asked.
"Worse than yesterday," I replied flippantly.
"And how was yesterday?"
"You should have asked yesterday,"
Mom rolled her eyes dramatically. "I take it, it wasn't great,"
"Not what I'll like to talk about, yes," I went to the fridge for cold water. I sighed in contentment as I took one swing from the plastic bottle.
Mom kept her glass beside her on the kitchen counter and tapped her temple in thought, her eyes shinning. "Now I'm curious," Her eyes settled on me, studying me from head to toe. "You look roughed up, hmm.... Were you raped?"
I raised an eyebrow as I drank the water some more. "Seriously mom? Of all the things in the world,"
"Then it was consented? You finally did me proud, who's the... special guy? I assume you were keeping your virginity for the one right?"
"Mom?"
"Oh, it's not that? A fist fight then? How crass. I would think my daughter was a little bit more.... hmm, refined,"
[Refined!]
"Don't judge me!" I snapped, tossing the water bottle back in the fridge and slammed the door shut. "Plus you just got here, you don't know shit."
"Oh yeah? Then what will justify getting in a fight like a hooligan?"
"She called you a slut," I glared at her then stormed away. I could feel the tears coming, I sniffed it down. How dare her, how dare she!
5 minutes later
I lay in bed stewing over it, planning how I'd hurt mother back. Maybe I don't ever talk to her, but will she really care? Therein lies the problem. I could tell her I went to the party behind her back. Still, the question stands, will she care? Probably not, she'd be glad I was becoming more like her for sure.
A slut. Sidney's voice sounded in my mind, cynically, smug, amused, totally unlike her.
I shuddered.
Of course I realized I was being a big hypocrite, this is what I said I wanted; my mom to be here even if it means to scold me. But, I dunno, the fact that she could discard parenting for as long as she wants only to pick it back up whenever she sees fit. It's too selfish.
Well mom has always been a selfish person so no surprise there, but the main reason, the part I didn't want to admit, was that it was too easy for her. I have always been the one longing for her attention for the longest time, worried of her safety, waiting for her text all day. And for what? So she can just pick my heart in the trash she kicked it, after breaking it a thousand times. It wasn't fair!
Someone knocked at my door pulling me from my thoughts. "Go away," I groaned.
"I just want to talk," mom said.
I sighed then stood and went to the door. Mom was wearing a pink bathrobe, her hair wet like she took a shower. "Here to apologize?" I asked.
"To your majesty? Nah,"
"Then what do you want to talk about? Don't you have a date tonight?"
"Not tonight," mom wrinkled her nose. "Dave is being too demanding...."
"Isn't he like, married?"
"He... he's. He most definitely is! Said he'll divorce his wife and marry me, ah." She grimaced. "Disgusting! I don't want to see him again! Why did I show him my house in the first place?"
"What are you worried about?" I teased, taking pleasure in her despair. "I thought he's a gentleman,"
"He's," mom nodded. "It's why I liked him best.... But he's also very stubborn. He won't change his mind easily if he decides on something. God he might file for a divorce before the week ends! I have become a homewrecker, too....."
"Nothing you can do to change his mind?"
"Maybe. I told him I won't ever see him again if he divorces that woman. I have met her once, a lovely person she's, maybe she deserves the divorce you know, deserves better...., That kind of thing. But what she doesn't know doesn't hurt her right?"
How hypocritical mom, I am in awe; I thought in disdain but said conspiratorially, "Besides you are not the kind of woman to be tied down mom,"
"Yeah," mom smiled. "You understand me so much Sami, what about you? Any guys around?"
"Not yet," I rolled my eyes unable to hide my total contempt for her way of life. If she saw it, she ignored it.
"Sure sure," she paused, then stared at me pointedly. "You weren't planning on going to bed without eating were you?"
I glared at her. "I was not looking forward to facing your smug face when I came down for dinner,"
"You are assuming I had even cooked. Come down, I'll order pizza then we can watch TV together, good?"
"Good, but...." Pizza? In this hard times, why not? "Er.... Sarah is coming for a sleep over tonight,"
"Oh,"
I could see her disappointment and it warmed me up a little. I was quick to add. "But you can join us,"
"Really? You don't think I'd be bothering you?"
"You can never be a bother mom,"
"OK, still it's pizza,"
"Sure," I said giddily.
Sarah arrived at 6pm sharp. We watched TV as we waited for the pizza to arrive. After it arrived mom poured us wine as we eat. It was surprising, but I actually had a good time with two of my favorite people. The movie was good too. A family comedy I didn't even care to remember the name of.
"Your mom is so cool," Sarah said as we retreated to my room.
"You wouldn't say that if she was your mom," I scoffed.
"Probably," my friend plopped down on my queen sized bed. Her green eyes sparkled. "Amanda's party was really fun wasn't it?"
"It was?"
"God yes! I can't believe I talked to Jackson.... Amanda told me he liked me and I should come to the next party her friends are throwing,"
"Really?" I asked in despair.
"You wouldn't believe it right?" Sarah went on oblivious to my rising horror. "Amanda has been talking to me, she said I am really pretty behind my frumpy cloths. That I'd fit in with them," she air quoted. "If I dressed better." She rolled her eyes but I could see the interest in her eyes.
I stared at Sarah mouth agape. The truth is, even I wonder why she wasn't one of the popular girls. Sarah is really pretty, maybe more than me, with bright green eyes that drew you to her, that blond hair, and god that perfect skin and curvy body! But she always wears conservative cloths. Long skirts and sweaters.
I felt horror dawning on me that I am going to lose my only friend.
"Sami? Is anything wrong?"
"N... No," I said quickly. "Just tired that's all,"
Sarah frowned, squinting at me. "Yeah you look kinda haggard since this morning. Are you sick?"
A knock on the door saved me from that question. Mother poked her head into the room. "Hey girls," she called. Sarah waved at her, she smiled at the girl fondly. "Sami, your grandma called. She wants you in the mansion tomorrow after school,"
"Grandma?" I felt the terror rising to my throat. "What for?"
Mom shrugged, but she looked worried too. "I have no idea. Don't stay up late girls, you have school tomorrow,"
"Yeah, sure....."
Still I wonder what grandma wants with me. I don't think it's because of affection though. Not that I can ignore her request really.
The Ravens family is a big wealthy family with roots dating to the medieval times. That means there's a lot of traditions and stuck up rules; family is everything. It might be my grandmother that's summoning me but it's in truth akin to an order from my boss. Grandma might not be the current head of the family__ which is my father__ but she is the most powerful.
The family owns almost half the city in real estate. With large international companies like the Rose Inc under their name.
It amazes me sometimes that I am a heiress of this family.
Anyway, I wonder what grandma wants with me. Was it the fight with Sidney? Did she tell on me? That bitch! But fuck, I don't wanna go!
That night I dreamt I was running through a rich forest of large trees of which branches filled with leaves stuck out, together making a huge canopy above. The forest was old and had a primordial air to it. A faint fog covered it making it seem cold, and the smell of ammonia, like piss, hung in the air.
I broke out of a shrub breathing out frost in panic and fright. Sid was right ahead of me as we ran. She was wearing a white tunic and white pants like I was, and again, we were both bare foot. The occasional thorns, barbs and sharp staves had cut into our soles too often, so we left bloody foot prints behind as we fled.
A humming sound from behind, like a faint vibration, was the only prove that our pursuer was still on our heels. We haven't lost it!
It was drawing closer, shaving the distance between us at every breath. Gaining on us as the humming grew louder and louder; the monster literally breathing down on our necks.
The fear was an iron claw gripping my heart. My breath was slow and stagnant, my body was trembling. He's gonna catch up, he's gonna catch up!
Except he never did, never could, until I eventually woke up.
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