Love

A ruddy light past the tallest buildings lent a glow to El Paso, the shadows the high-rises were throwing over him made Tim a little bit nervous. He had never liked driving into cities, even though he was still only on the freeway on the outskirts, he could feel it looming. Since Tim didn’t like the thought of going much deeper in population density, he switched lanes to the right when he could and started paying attention to the exit signs.

The second sign he saw promised gas and lodgings next exit. The area looked a little industrial but fairly clean, which made up his mind that whatever hotel was indicated by the small roofed building on the exit sign was his destination.

Rachel had remained blissfully silent as he drove. Tim wasn’t sure if she was letting him re-acquaint himself with driving or lost in her own thoughts. A little bit of both he would guess. Tim still had a few miles until he reached the exit, the hotel should be within a minute or two of that. It seemed like the perfect time to start a conversation he may need a distraction to end quickly.

“What was he like? Your husband?”

Rachel must be with him for a reason. Maybe it was as simple as her brutish disregard for his feelings was forcing him to confront things he would have avoided thinking about. He wasn’t denying himself the knowledge. He just tried to never think about them all the time. Tim also could learn something from her. About her? He wasn’t sure. This was their last night together, he had to take the chance to have a meaningful conversation. Fists or tears be damned.

Rachel looked stung for a moment, hurt. The barriers she had built around herself went to red alert at even the mention of the memories they protected within. Her mouth opened, she turned more fully in her seat towards him. Tim could not even guess at her thought process.

Her mouth hung open for a moment then closed. She looked towards him but not at him. He could see the realization wash the anger away. This would be her last chance to ever talk about him. To tell someone how she felt about him.

Rachel settled back, distrustful but resigned.

“He believed in me. I knew…” For the third time since he had met her, Rachel did not have the words adequate to explain the depth of the concept she was trying to reveal to him.

In this case it wasn’t the answer to how human consciousness transcended the mortal to live endlessly, unrestrained by time or distance. No. It was the love between her and her husband.

“I knew he’d be there for me. No matter what.” She continued, starting to gain some confidence. “If I told him I had killed someone, he’d help me cover it up. No question.”

Her eyes burned as she spoke, her passion igniting her as always, coursing through her entire body. Tim wondered as she went on, did other people actually feel this way? He wasn’t sure he loved anyone as intensely as Rachel did. He’d known Rachel at least long enough to know that she would murder anyone who threatened someone she loved, and stare in their eyes as the light fled from them. Tim shivered.

She talked and he listened, eyes on the road, exit less then a mile away. He tried to be a good listener, expressing disbelief or admiration where appropriate, generally just letting her talk. He did not want to break the spell that animated her. Rachel let down her guard, becoming charming and engaging. Tim guessed his way through the arrows at the end of the exit to not interrupt her. As he’d expected Rachel had lived an interesting life, interspersing stories of outdoor adventures and high shenanigans with dog-sledding in Montana and ghost crab hunting in the Outer Banks.

As soon as her children started to creep unbidden into her tales Tim stopped roaming through the intersection and made a bee line for the nearest hotel.

“That one! That’s it! I can tell.” Tim wasn’t sure he’d slip this one by her but he had to try.

“…oh. Yeah, looks good.” Rachels eyes focused to look at the hotel now directly ahead of them.

Tim monitored her out of the corner of his eye, she was collecting her stuff, taking inventory on cigarettes and drugs too from the look.

Tim knew what to do.

The hotel was just ahead of them and to the left, so he had to take a quick right after his light turned. He pulled into the hotel and around the back. There were two wings to either side and arcing away from the main lobby area, two floors all around. Rooms were both on the front of the wings and back. Time pulled around the back side of the right wing, scanning the lot. He knew what he was looking for. He soon found it, a spot in the corner nestled next to a medium sized tree, right in front of the outer most room on the back side of this wing. He rolled into the spot, careful not to scrape the hubcaps against the curb that separated the parking lot from the wilderness that surrounded it.

Tim shifted the car into park and sat back, taking his other hand from the wheel as well. Now that he was longer in control of the car, he let out a long breath he didn’t realize he had been holding since he started to drive. Holy shit he had driven.

Rachel had been watching him silently as he brought them to their location. Judging his driving he was certain, keeping quiet about it at least. She had been less talkative than usual for these past few hours. The impending end of this was surely weighing as heavily on her as it was on him, probably more so. Rachel claimed she had died and Tim believed her. He would wake up (he hoped/assumed/preyed/dreaded) when this was over. It may very well be the last twenty-four hours of Rachels entire existence. He wasn’t sure if anyone ever had such terrible knowledge hanging over their head.