The next morning I woke up to the smell of something sweet in the air. I went into the kitchen to see Jones making crepes. Crepes had been my favorite breakfast since childhood. This has to be Jones way of apologizing.
"Goodmorning, want some crepes?" He asked innocently. A nervous smile appearing on his face. You could tell that he wanted me to say yes.
I nodded my head and sat at the counter. When Jamey was done he set a plate in front of me and sat done next to me. We sat in silence. Silence makes Jamey anxious. During tests on school he'd always bounce his leg or fidget in his chair.
Feeling the vibrations throw my chair I could tell that some things were still the same. I sighed. I had to break the silence. "You want to head to the bar tonight?" I muttered quietly.
"Yes!"
The answer was quick making me snap my head to look at him. He had the brightest smile on his face. I missed this smile; his true smile. I could look at it all day. I could feel myself grin whole looking at him. I felt all my anger just disappear.
The rest of breakfast we talked like old times. We joked and laughed. He told me how he is in photography school which isn't all that shocking. His father had given him a camera when he was younger. Jamey had taken photos of almost everything and anything. Most of them being me of course. I wonder if he still has that.
I wanted to just ask him why he wants to forget me or why did he actually move away, but the conversation was just going so well. I couldnt ruin that.
-
Time past and we spent all day together. We went shopping and gamed together. We chatted all day long about whatever we could. I enjoyed every second of it. God I missed him. I missed him so damn much. We are about to head to the bar; I'm just waiting for him to change.
Did he really want to forget me? He insisted that we spend all day together, and yet he wants to forget me? I wish I knew what he was thinking. When we were younger it was so much easier.
He finally came out of his room. I have to say he has gotten way better at styling his clothes. He used to just wear a shirt and some shorts, but now he's wearing a leather jacket and sunglasses. He reminds me of a biker.
"How do I look?"
He did a small pose which made me chuckle. Is he sparkling? Oh God his smile is so amazing. I think I have butterflies. Is that weird? Gosh was he always this good looking?
"Yes"
Was the only word I managed to squeeze out of my throat. Oh fuxk I totally just said something dumb.
"Yes?"
He laughed. Oh my fucking God did his laugh always sound like that? Was it always this nice to hear? The way he is looking at me is making my skin feel hot.
"I- I mean you look good!" I stammered out quickly. Why was I so hesitant to say that? It's true isn't it? I looked away quickly putting my hands on my face trying to cool myself down. Is it hot in here? Did I leave the heater on?
"Thank you, now let's go" He chuckled.
-
We decided on Stone Hedge Bar. It was closer and an easy walk. It was just a little busy, but not too crazy. Jones went and sat at a two person booth. If we sat at the bar there is no way that we wouldn't get drunk.
We talked like we always did. We joked and we even talked about how we both met Juni. It was nice. Then for a second there is a silence. I can feel Jones eyes on me. He is staring at me so intently he could practically burn a hole through me. All the sudden he reaches across the table. I feel the pad of his thumb brush against the scar under my eye.
My eyes widen and my face flushed. "Jones...?" I muttered quietly. I didn't want to ruin whatever this was but at the same time the more his hand lingered on my cheek the hotter my face would get.
His own eyes widen he quickly pulled his hand away and blushed tremendously. He rubbed the back of his head avoiding eye contact. "How'd you get it...?" He asked nervously. Jones eyes then winced almost as if he regretted asking.
I wanted so badly to make up some other story. I felt like if he could forget about me I could forget about him. I had many ways of saying how I got the scar, like some rando with rings punched me. I could use any bullshit story, but I won't. I don't want to forget about Jamey.
"I was young. My friend had gotten cut from saving me. It was my fault. It was a badass scat but my friend didn't think so. I cut my face because I didn't want him to go through it alone." I smiled softly, "It hurt like hell, but his smile...his smile was so worth it."
Jones smiled at me. His stupid sparkling smile. Just then a server came and brought us our food. I was suprised to see a burger on Jones's plate. I raised my eyebrow in confusion. For as long as I know Jamey he has never like hamburgers. Now he does. When did he even start liking burgers? I wish I was there to witness that magical moment.
I wish he didn't leave during highschool. I wanted to graduate with him. We could've spent college together. I wouldn't ever have to get married if I just had him. I could've help him dye his hair.
I would've witnessed that magical moment of when Jamey tried a burger and actually liked it.
I could feel my eyes start to sting. Am I about to cry? Hell no! I'm not crying at some stupid bar! I put my hands on my face to try to hold myself together.
Jones looked at me with concern and guilt. His eyes refused to look at my own."I'll go get us some more drinks..."He murmured. I just nodded my head and rested my head in my hands.
Isn't he realizing how much he is hurting me? Doesn't he know how painful it was not seeing my bestfriend for 3 whole years? I say all this and yet I'm staying right by him. I'm hurting myself by being here. I can't help it...hes just so...ad-
"HEY! YOu WastEd My~DriNk!" My thoughts were interrupted by the sudden commotion. I turned my head to see Jones profusely apologizing to the man. The drunkered raised his fist as if he was about to hit him. This stupid bastard.
"You Little fucker don't you dare touch MY JAMEY!"
Jones stared at me his eyes wide but sparkling. Shit...I called him Jamey. The dumb fuck looked at me and started to walk over to me. Jones grabbed my wrist and apologized once more before leading me outside. I needed some air and so did he.
I felt like shit. I accidentally gave Jamey second hand embarrassment. Why the hell can't I control my temper? I'm so stupid.
"I'm sorry for causing a scene" I mumbled apologetically.
"It's alright...You probably could've handled it better. You just never change" He said with a smile. My eyes then widened once I realized what he had said. He had said something that you don't say to a someone you met a week ago but to someone you've know for a while.
Once he processed his own words his eyes widen and he covered his mouth. "I-I mean-" he stammered. Is he serious...? He wants to forget it all? My eyes were stinging again and my throat felt like it was dry. I don't know why I did it but I slapped him.
Jones eyes were wide as he held his cheek. I felt tears streaming from cheeks. He had the face of guilt. I hated it. I hated that I felt guilty too. "Jamey you are a fucking ass! I was going along with it but I can't do it! I can't do it anymore! This shit isn't funny! This isn't just some game it's real life and It's hurting me Jamey"
"Vanilla-"
"NO! Shut up! You have no idea how I felt when you left. You don't know how I feel right now knowing you want to forget me...Why keep me around?" I bit my lip. He looked at me with remorse. He extended his hand out to me. I didn't want to touch me. I slapped his hand away.
"Fuxk off Jamey Jones. I'm going home and when I wake up tomorrow I better see you gone!" I stormed off leaving Jamey alone. I didn't mean it. I didn't want him gone. I was just angry. Please don't leave me again.