The Stupid Teens have a Stupid Idea that does Something Stupid.

"Yo, dude, how's being holy?" Bo asked me. He's the only person that isn't in the production (that isn't my dad) that I've really talked to about doing Sister Act. 

"I mean, it's fine I guess. I hate the stupid alter boy costume though. Fortunately, it turns out I don't have to be homeless for 'I Could be That Guy'." I found that out last night during practice. It's probably for the best. Doubt I would do well on the show only practicing it twice.

"Bro what's wrong with the costume? Aren't those supposed to be really loose? Plus don't white outfits do well with heat?" Bo asked me. 

"I mean, not if I'm double layered with a red robe underneath. I don't like it either, but the white one is too thin without it. It's either my nuts become a sweatshop or feel practically naked in front of everyone."

"Man, you sure you're required to wear the red one?"

"Yeah, why?"

"'Cause shit dawg, I'd take your place."

I laughed a little. What makes it even better is that Bo probably would. He'll do basically anything if it means that he can amuse himself, even more so others. He's always been sort of a class clown, which, I guess is good for him. He passes classes and if that's good enough for him, then I'm not gonna try and change the guy. 'Specially because I actually find the guy hilarious myself.

"Anyways, wanna head back to my place? I think we should have pizza or something leftover." I offered, taking a sip of some of my Code Red. "Oh, and I'm also supposed to get another cool ass piece of science junk for my room today."

"I mean I guess so. Pizza's good and sitting on xenomorph eggs sounds way more interesting than just sitting around here and doing jack shit." He responded. I... do not know if I should be worried about his willingness to sit on xenomorph eggs but at this point I'll run with it. 

We got in my car and we started driving home. I once again forced Bo to indulge in my Daft Punk exclusive playlist for roughly seven minutes, which at this point is standard issue for anyone getting in my car, and it'll continue to be standard issue thank you very much. Bo's been trying to get me into some indie bands though. They've been fine enough so far. Nothing to write home about.

I pulled into my house right as my dad got out of his car. Guess he got home early. I saw him get out this box and anticipated it being super heavy, or having some weird attachment for the shapeshifting that we would have to figure out. Usually dad brings this sort of thing home in parts. He guides me through putting these things together, but he does make me do the leg work myself when I get cool new shit like this. Something about learning more about "what he does for a living". I do respect it, I just don't like it myself.

"Hey, got that shapeshifting bottle I told you about 2 days ago! Why don't you and Bo put it together, eh?" Dad told us as I grabbed the box. To my shock, it was actually fairly light. He kept talking; "Besides, if nothing else, this should be fairly easy for you to put together. All you need to do is hook up two wires and then plug this bad boy in". Honestly a sweet deal, light and small enough to bring in easily, and not too difficult to put together. At least, as long as Bo doesn't do something stupid with the wires. He comes up with dumb shit ideas sometimes and then chooses to run with them, whether he was joking initially or not. 

I brought the thing inside and to the kitchen. I opened the box, there was a bottle inside. Said before when I watched the video that it looked like glass. It also felt like glass, by that I mean it was clear, and really smooth. It was a bit thick, too. Inside of that glass was this floating purple blob, again, much like the video my dad had shown me of it. Underneath was a pod that the bottle had to be put in, easy peasy, put it in. All we had to do now was go to my room with the bottle and the remote and plug it in.

I went upstairs with Bo and tried to take a swig of my Code Red again, only to be met with the disappointing news that it was empty.

"Dude, why don't you empty that glass bottle into your Code Red bottle?" Bo suggested.

"Man that's an awful idea, it must be where it is for a reason, right? You don't mess with sci-fi shit like that," I tried explaining to him.

"But dawg, if it works it'll be really funny," he tried assuring me.

"And if it doesn't, dad'll hound both of our asses for it. We're not putting it in the Code Red bottle," I asserted.

"Alright, alright, but I'm keeping that idea." He responded.

We went into my room, I set it on my bedside table and plugged it in. Sure enough, the pod began glowing as the purple blob inside the bottle started to shake around and jiggle.

I turned the knob on the remote and watched it change shape and material in rapid succession. Turning into a stone that nearly hit the bottom of the bottle before becoming water. Then it got thinner, and green, before it turned a dark, dark black, and became like paint. It kept shifting around, at one point it turned into this big, soft, pink wooly ball. I settled back onto that purple blob it started as, before leaving it be. 

"So dude what are we gonna do now? You wanna screw around with this more, or..." Bo asked me.

"I was thinking we could just play some games or something. Not much else we can do. Besides, how else could we screw around with this?" I responded. "And no, don't tell me to put it in the Code Red bottle. We're not doing that."

"Aw c'mon, we know you probably can now." Bo tried to sway me. "The bottle doesn't look like it's doing anything significant other than keeping it in place."

"Yeah, and what if a different bottle can't handle it? We don't know how it shifts, what if a Mountain Dew bottle can't handle whatever happens when we turn this knob and change the form of…" I stopped for a moment, realizing that I had no idea what the thing in the bottle was even called. "The shapeshifting thing in that bottle," yeah, that works.

"Dude, if it mattered your dad would have told us." Bo argued. I would cave, not because I thought this was a good idea, more that I couldn't see anything significant going wrong, and I was already sick of this idea and wanted to do it just to get Bo to stop bugging me about it, if nothing else.

"Alright, fine. I'll put it in, but only so you'll stop trying to get on my ass over this stupid shit, ok?" 

"Cool with me, do it." Bo would encourage. 

I would first change the shapeshifting thing, still in its blob form, to water. Just because I know that this machine doesn't affect gravity, yet that form still floats. I had no idea what made it float, or if I could move it. Much less pour it. This is just easier. I would remove the bottle from the base, and pour the water into my soda bottle. I'd close the lid, before setting it back onto the base.

"Alright, moment of truth," I would tell Bo. In all honesty, seeing it in that Code Red bottle made me grow on the idea more. Still, have to try and switch it back to make sure that nothing is changed by the shapeshifting thing having a new home. I would switch it to its blob form, what seemed to be the perennial default.

And then the bottle straight up melted.

I shit you not, it just straight up melted on the base. The blob would stop floating immediately, before falling to the floor, though it still seemed lively as it was in the jar, only now, something was different about the jiggling. It felt more meaningful, for lack of a better word.

"Dude." I would get Bo's attention as he watched in just as much awe as me.

"What." He would blankly respond.

"I am never running with one of your stupid ideas again." I would tell him.

"Uh, well, if you think about it-" He would start, but he got cut off by the sudden change in the blobs 'behavior'. As if it didn't feel 'alive' enough already, it would start moving toward me, I was still kneeling on the ground from having set this whole shitshow up. 

"Dude what the hell is it doing now?!?!?!" Bo would ask me, now extremely confused as to what was happening.

"You think I know?!?!" I would half-yell back, panicked by it now seeming to be actively chasing after my still static body. 

The blob would jump at my arm, before turning into an acid like substance, quickly melting itself into me. I would grab my arm in pain as it somehow quickly sealed itself from what had just happened, though still burning.

This can't be good.