Chapter Thirteen

Before I could think of taking a well-deserved nap, I had to shower. I wanted all the prison dirt to be cleansed off me.

"I missed our room so much." I told Buhle.

"I missed your presence in our room." Buhle told me making me smile.

"I'm going to take a shower." I said directly to a Buhle's face when he got close enough. I hoped he'd join me.

"You do that and rest up...... I have to go to work." He told me dropping all the excitement I had.

"Right Now?"

"Yeah...... I'm actually late." Buhle said after looking at his wrist watch and then back at me.

"But baby I just got home." I said with tears forming in my eyes, which was embarrassing because why was I about to cry right now.

"Babe I'll be back......... you don't have to be sad...... I'll be home at like 9:30 max." Buhle added making nothing better.

"Okay." I responded and wiped my tears right before they got too far down my face.

"I love you." Buhle told me and kissed my forehead.

"I love you too." I answered without making any eye contact.

I headed to the bathroom and run the shower water. After a minute, I was ready for my shower. Thirty minutes later, I got out of the bathroom with a towel around my body and another one on my head, drying my hair.

"Welcome home!" Buhle and Siwe yelled blasting confetti into the air. I felt a pinch of nostalgia hit me in that moment. I was reminded of my birthday. Placed on my be were gifts and balloons. This time around all the gifts were wrapped so I had no idea what I got by first glance. I smiled so wide, I could feel tears filling up my eyes.

"What if I walked out naked?" I asked Buhle.

"Why would you walk out naked in a room you share with Buhle........ a man?" Siwe asked confused making Buhle and I share a laugh. Little does she know.

"Get a robe." Buhle told me.

"Why?" I asked.

Buhle flashed car keys at me and I jumped. Literally.

"Oh my God!....... Babe!" I exclaimed and rushed for a hug and kiss. And more kisses. My mouth remained wide open when Buhle handed me the keys. He had a big smile on his face the whole time.

When I finally went outside, I walked out to a black G wagon with a white bow on it. I was mute. I didn't even know what to do with myself. My welcome was just heartwarming and beautiful.

I took Buhle and Siwe for my first ride in my new car. We didn't go too far. When we got back to the house, I found Buhle's houseworkers in the kitchen. We were having cake and a much-needed introduction and a getting to know each other gathering. I officially met Chris, Thandiwe and Barbara, they were amazing. No wonder my daughter loves them. Before, I knew only faces, no names, no personalities.

'8:47pm'

Buhle and I had just got out of the shower. I was so horny. I wanted to fuck right in the shower, but I was too shy to make the first move. As we dried off a little too far away from each other, Buhle was rambling about his previous month. Work stuff. Couldn't this man see that I wanted him so bad. After Buhle finish drying himself. He reached out for a drawer, picking out his boxers. He looked at me as he put them on. This man really couldn't take a hint. I walked up to him with my towel still wrapped around me. I stood right in front of him and looked into his eyes deeply before a led, my right hand into his boxers grabbing his penis, rubbing on it. Buhle's breathing pace quickened which made me even more horny. He kissed me slowly and passionately, pulling me closer, brushing my body against his. He stripped me off of my towel and lifted me off the floor and placed me around his waist never breaking the kiss.

My moans grew louder and louder with each thrust. Both our bodies craved this. A year and months separated. I could have sex every hour for three weeks straight honestly, that's how deprived and hungry I was.

When it was all done and Buhle was sleeping. I walked to the closet and found my diaper box right where I left it. For a whole year, I wasn't provided diapers. In prison, I used sanitary towels.....with how low quality they were they leaked, and still caused a mess. I was in isolation so the reek of urination didn't affect other inmates but it did affect me. I should be traumatized with everything I went through in that place.

I wore my diaper and grabbed a fresh set of pajamas. When I got back to the bed Buhle was sleeping right at the center. He must have gotten so used to sleeping alone because he had his legs spread so far apart. I tucked my self in and let my body get the rest It deserved.

It has been a week since I was dismissed of all my charges. Life was slowly picking up. I helped Buhle and Siwe get ready for work and school every morning. I played housewife as I waited to get accepted to any of the companies applied for work. I helped Thandiwe and Barbara when I could. I felt guilty just sitting around the house doing nothing. Growing up, I did a lot of chores 'being a girl' in a South African home. I didn't mind helping anyways.

"I'm so bored and I miss you so much." I told Buhle over the phone. I was in the kitchen, making myself some breakfast.

"Miss Ntuli ........ this came in the mail for you." Jabulani told me handing me an envelope. Jabulani worked at the gate.

I took the envelope and put it on the kitchen counter finishing my call with Buhle. After my breakfast, I was still on a call with Buhle.... This man couldn't stop talking. I walked up the stairs opening the envelope amidst laughter. I spread the note that was inside apart and read the message that was at the center of the mostly blank paper. It read Justice will be served. That scared the crap out of me but I tried to keep my sane.

"Uhm babe....... I'll call you later..... I have something I have to do real quick." I spoke into the phone and cut the call immediately and turned my phone off afterwards too.

What the fuck. Who would send me such a letter and why? It didn't even have a senders address. Well obviously.

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"Babe..... babe.... Baby." Buhle called, shaking me out of a nightmare. "Are you okay?" he asked. He was clearly confused and concerned.

I sat up wiping the sweat off my face and breathing out slowly in relief. I've had nightmares four nights in a row. The letter fucked me up. It had me thinking about Sindiswa's torture sessions and shooting. I had nightmares about prison too......... possible verdicts........ and my own death.

"I'm okay." I answered.

"No you're not......... this has been happening every night....... I can feel you shaking, even when we're not close to each other...... do you want to tell me what you keep dreaming about?"

"Prison......"

"What about it? maybe I should get you a therapist."

"There's no need to get me a therapist....... I keep dreaming about stuff that happened in prison that's it."

"When I asked what the nightmares were about I expected a more detailed explanation. I can't just settle for "stuff that happened in prison"."

"I don't want to go into detail because I don't want to think about it."

".................."

Buhle moved closer to me and held me, making me lay on his chest. I didn't want to sleep. I didn't want to think about my sister.

So, I started kissing Buhle's chest then I moved to his neck.

"Babe." he complained.

"Please....... Just for a second." I begged and put my hand in his boxers, pulling out his penis. I rubbed it rhythmically.

"I've got work in the morning." Buhle continued complaining with his eyes still shut.

I turned Buhle's face to face mine and kissed his lips until he kissed me back. I could feel his hard developing as we shoved our tongues down one another's throats.

Buhle touched my bottoms, but his hand drifted off. I was in a diaper. Fuck. That was awkward for me so I stopped everything. I sat up and shortly after so did Buhle.

"Are you dry?" Buhle asked me. I squinted my eyes confused.

"................."

"In the Uhm........ the bottom."

I nodded.Yes.

I had on one of Buhle's old T-shirts. I wore a different one every night because they were more comfortable than pajamas, and they barely formed a diaper puff up when I wore them.

After I nodded my head, Buhle adjusted. He shifted his sitting and had his whole body face me. He put his hands on the bottom sides of my shirt.

"Take this off." he ordered.

I put my arms up and let Buhle take the shirt off of me, leaving me breasts out with only my diaper still on. Buhle stared at the diaper, which made me freeze in embarrassment. Before I could get up and run to the bathroom. Buhle unstrapped the diaper on both sides and took it off me. He was trying to figure out where the straps were. That's why he stared.

This moment. This was a moment of the highest trust and security. This moment made me feel like him and I we're officially one. Nothing to hide at all. I laid down all my vulnerabilities, and Buhle put them in a glass box. Holding onto them with love. I love this man.

"You don't ever have to feel like I shouldn't see you wearing a diaper.......... I know you do."

I smiled a little because of the statement, after which Buhle picked me up and placed me on his lap. He rubbed on his dick to get it harder and I watched.

"I want you to show me what you can do." Buhle told.

I have always wanted to do this, and I was going to do it with everything in me. He deserved it.

I woke up the next morning to my ringtone. It was a Thursday morning. When I picked my phone up, I found out that it was 11 AM. I overslept. I didn't get to help Buhle nor Siwe get ready for their days.

"Hello." I answered the unknown caller.

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For the rest of the day, all I could think about was the call. The person on the other end breathed heavily into his speaker before he told me to watch my back. First the note now the call.

I couldn't get out of bed. I kept calling the number back asking who it was, but got silence and immediate decline. After a while, the number was claimed to be nonexistent when I called. What the hell. Who would be threatening me? Luthando is dead. No one else knew about my sister other than him, and I was proven innocent. I didn't understand what was going on.

"Come in." I said, after I heard a knock at my door. Siwe walked in, she was in her school uniform, she must have just gotten back home from school.

"Hi mommy." She greeted and walked up to me.

"Hi my baby, how was school?"

"Good....... It's like three....... why are you still in bed? have you even showered?"

" I just got up."

Gasps. "How and why would you get up now?"

" I was tired....... Now go Do your homework so that I get those old braids out before it gets late."

"Okay!...." Siwe responded and rushed out of my room. After Siwe left, I headed to the bathroom. I got on with my shower.

I helped Siwe undo her old braids. This little girl had tonnes of questions, and she never ran out of them. I answered all the questions as best as I could.

Buhle texted that we would have dinner at his restaurant today so other than undoing Siwe's old braids I had to tie her hair neatly as well afterwards.

At 6:45pm Siwe and I were prepared for dinner.

"Why are you always so extra?" Siwe asked me laughing as we walked to my car. I had on a black body fitting mini dress, it's whole back was bare. I had on nude heels with a matching purse. I tied my hair in a slicked back bun and I had a mild touch of make up.

"Sweetie I just have to be if I'm walking out of a G wagon and eating at a table with the owner of the restaurant." I clapped back.

Siwe was in a basic striped kids dress with old skool vans. I tied her hair into two low ties and braided the ends.

"Can we go already?" Siwe whined, as I fixed my make up in my mirror?

"Okay okay.... I'm done." I said and started the car.

Buhle's spot was filled with so many people at night. The bars were full and the clubs were just as packed. The entrance was super busy. Most people knew that I was Buhle's girlfriend, so I had to deliver in terms of looks and presentation each time I was to eat dinner at his spot. I couldn't not look my best.

Siwe and I walked in through the VIP entrance without the entrance manager even looking down at his list. When we got into the restaurant, a waiter lead us to our table and give us menus.

"I will fetch Mr.Lukuhle." The waiter announced before he left. I smiled politely with a nod.

"What do you want to have today Siwe?" I asked.

"Uhm....... I want something with pasta." Siwe responded as she looked over the menu.

I stared at my baby for 30 seconds. She has grown so much. She was two years old just a day ago.

Buhle finally came and joined us at the table. He gave me a kiss before taking a seat.

"Hey Siwe." Buhle greeted.

"Heyyyyy." Siwe replied with so much energy.

"You look so tired." I told Buhle after which I grabbed his face to look at me with my hand.

"I am."

I pecked his lips four times before the waiter came and we had to order. After dinner was all done. The three of us talked, and she had a few laughs. Buhle seemed less stressed now, and I was so happy for that.

"We should go now." Buhle said and got up. I got up shortly after him. Siwe remained sitting, she was on her phone. I was going to lose it. She was so obsessed with her phone. It was annoying.

"Siwe....... I know you heard Buhle.... Come on get up let's go." I said firmly.

Siwe sat still, and started recording me with a smile on her face. She was testing me for sure.

The lights in the restaurant dimmed.

Dream about you by Lloyiso started playing softly from the speakers. Looking around I saw so many people's phone flashes pointed at me.

Buhle was on one knee with a ring box opened in his hands. I couldn't hold my tears back. People in the restaurant cheered as I cried my eyes out with a big smile on my face. Before I pulled myself together Buhle asked me a question I thought I'd never hear in my entire life.

"Qhamani Ntuli ....... Will you marry me?" Buhle asked and I immediately nodded yes.

"Yes." I said from my mouth as well.

The cheers got even louder when Buhle put the ring on my finger. What luck the people that chose to have dinner here today had. The scenery was so beautiful. When we walked into the restaurant, I didn't even notice the new decor which was probably for this moment.

Buhle got up and gave me a hug after which he pecked my lips and then hugged me again.

Buhle 's smile was so contagious. I couldn't stop smiling because of him.

I didn't like public attention but I made an exception today. One of the waiters brought a microphone on a serving dish. Oh God.

"Just in case some people didn't hear me at the far end......... I asked this beautiful woman here. My beautiful woman to marry me." The crowd applauded and cheered like they had only realized that it was a marriage proposal now.

"I want to start my own family." Buhle continued to speak through the microphone. "I already have my wife......... the mother to my future children."

"Awwwwwww." People echoed after Buhle paused. I blushed really hard.

"I have Qhamani on board........ and now I have a question for this little angel sitting at my table." Buhle continued and looked at Siwe.

I froze and so did Siwe. Siwe was so stunned she couldn't even record anymore.

Usually when a man or a woman with kids gets married to someone who isn't the mother or father to the children involved, they never really ask for their permission or involve them in most issues.....it's more of an automatic result. Whether the kids like the partner or not, they are bound to be the step children without even being asked.

Hence, It was sweet and so thoughtful of Buhle to include my baby girl.

Buhle bent on one knee in front of Siwe and she covered her face crying. It was a beautiful moment. I watched with my hand on my chest the whole time. Buhle took out a box from his pocket and opened it, It was a necklace that read 'Malkia', which means princess in Swahili.

"Nelisiwe Hlongwane......... will you be my daughter?.......... My little princess."

Siwe nodded and gave Buhle a hug. The hug was followed by applause and cheers. Buhle has been a father figure to my daughter for four years. He didn't even have to ask because he is her father. He was the minute they met.

The show was over now. As I walked out of the restaurant, everyone congratulated me and I thanked them with a smile. Siwe and Buhle were right behind me. They are playing some game that I didn't make sense out of. They were always playing games I couldn't understand. Siwe was laughing so hard. Each time I looked back at them, they stop laughing. They continued when I faced forward. They were always leaving me out of the fun. When we got home Buhle went straight to Siwe's room. He always tucked her in.

"Noooooooo......., You put your hands together like this." Siwe laughed and demonstrated.

Siwe was in her pajamas, sitting up on her bed under her covers. Buhle was sitting on a chair by her side, trying to do what she was telling him to do. I was watching at the door impatiently waiting for my man.

"That's how I put my hands the first time." Buhle whined.

"Nooooooo...... your fingers were not together in a symmetrical kinda way."

Symmetrical. This girl.

"Okay now they are."

"So you have them like that and then you split the middle ones like this and push your thumbs away like this." Siwe continue her demonstration, and Buhle continue trying in difficulty.

"Yo!...... you'll never get it..... you just have to admit that I'm better than you." Siwe teased as Buhle continued trying.

"Babe." I whined ending their laughter.

"Just a second." He asked, still trying to do whatever the hell they were doing with your fingers. I turned the light off, making both of them complain.

"Okay we'll continue tomorrow...... someone's getting jealous and impatient." Buhle told Siwe and they both laughed.

Nothing was funny.

"Goodnight my baby!" I told Siwe.

"Goodnight...... party pooper." She replied making me roll my eyes.

That wasn't funny either, but Siwe and Buhle got a laugh out of it. Maybe my humor was just broken. After the long tuck in, I was finally in bed with my fiancé.

"So when do you want the wedding to happen?" Buhle asked me.

"A week after Siwe's birthday."

"That's less than a month away......... that's like three weeks from now."

" I know...... I want to marry you that soon."

"Okay then........ I guess I'll have to start making calls tomorrow........ we have a lot to do...... the lobola..... the traditional engagement....."

"It's a lot I know but I just want it to happen as soon as possible."

"Your father was so happy when I told him I wanted to marry you you know........ both our fathers actually."

"What did my Mother say?.... And Gogo."

"Your mother was pleased too...... your grandmother speaks Zulu, which I don't understand so I don't know how she took the news."

Gogo probably wouldn't come for my wedding. I know how she behaves. She cursed me for not attending the final funeral for my sister. How could I go to such an event. I was accused of killing her. No one in their right mind should have expected me to go for the funeral.

"As long as our parents are happy and have approved. That's all that matters."

For the rest of the night Buhle and I talked about our future. How many kids we wanted and possible names until we fell asleep.