chapter 19: connecting the dots

At home Aiden was acting a little weird. He has not talked to me ever since this morning. It got me questioning what happened at school today that got him into a bad mood. I tried to make conversation with him when preparing for dinner.

"You want to eat what Aiden?" I asked. He refused to look at me and continued to watch the tv. After a few seconds he answers me saying that he's not hungry and walks upstairs. I started to overthink, did I do something wrong?

After my lonely dinner, I went to my room to see how Aiden is doing but when I opened the door, he's not there. I went to the guest room to check if he's there and he is.

"You're sleeping here?"

"Yeah." He replied in short.

"Why?"

"No reason? You used to keep asking me about why I didn't use this room. So I decided to use it tonight." He said, still not looking at me, instead looking at his phone. I felt like a ghost here. It felt like I'm being ignored. Deep inside I want to punch this guy, throw the table at him, chop him into pieces, deep fry him and feed him to the stray cats. But then I remembered how miserable his life is already and I shouldn't add another burden to him.

"Fine... If you want to sleep here then go ahead. Make sure you set your own alarm okay? Good night." Even after a 'good night' he still didn't say anything to me. I decided to close the door and just walk into my room before I burst out of anger.

I'm such a hypocrite. I told Aiden to not forget to set his own alarm because I wouldn't be there to wake him up. Funny, I'm the one who forgot. Actually, I'm not sure. In the shower I can't help but to think about how I didn't hear my alarm. I'm quite sure that I did set my alarm last night so how did I fail to wake up? However it's already late and I chose to just shake it off. After wearing my PE uniform, I quickly rush to the quest room to wake Aiden up. However when I opened the door, the bed was already made up. No one's there. The window is open, the aircon is closed, I guess Aiden is already downstairs.

I went to the dinning room for my breakfast and all I see is mom and dad only there, no Aiden. I decided to ask them about Aiden and they said that he already went to school early today by himself. He said because he wants to discuss about homeworks together with his friends before the first period. I started to get suspicious because there's no homework given yesterday. Is this boy lying? Although my curiosity is killing me, I chose to think positively. Maybe he just has something personal to do at school. I quickly took a bite into my waffles because my dad was already on his way to the car.

When I thought that Aiden's behavior is the only weird thing that I will have to face for probably several days, not receiving letters anymore is another weird thing that I might have to get used to everyday. Maybe this is the best, at least I don't have to break their hopes again. Walking down the hallway with students whispering about me and Saff, silently laughing about how I don't get any letters, discussing whether I looked better with full natural makeup or just sunscreen and lip balm, I felt so socially retarded.

I went to check in my drawer again to see whether there are letters or none. It's really happening, my social status has decreased dramatically after the day I went to school with no makeup.

"It seems like I'm no longer the popular boy." I sighed

"Why would you think like that?" Fadly asked

"I stop receiving letters after I stop wearing makeup to school."

"Wait all of these times you were wearing makeup? Did you wear makeup today?"

"I just used sunscreen and lip balm."

"Then you just look the same."

"Really?"

"Yeah. You're already good looking enough without makeup. Honestly, you look the same as last week which I assume you were wearing makeup." My heart melted by what Fadly said. I hugged him out of my consciousness.

"But you did not receive any letters today?" Fadly asked.

"Not just today but also yesterday."

"Hummm, that's weird. I don't think it's because of your decision to not wear makeup. You're still looking cute even without. There must be another reason or something happened."

I got so invested in Fadly theories. Although most of them sound stupid but the idea of something happening to the letters got me so intrigued. Suddenly someone knocked on our class window.

"Samuel!" I opened the window for him.

"Hi hunnies."

"What are you doing here? Something happened?"

"Nothing, just doing my duty as a prefect."

"The principal is mad about something, I can sense it." Fadly said with his index finger pointing to this head.

"Yeah... There's a class from another block that forgot to throw away their rubbish bag yesterday and now their class smells like shit. They got reported to the principal by their own classroom's teacher. The principal went to their class to check how bad it was and he said it smells like dried up recently used mop and expired doritos." I just closed my eyes in disgust when I managed to imagine how bad it smelled.

"The principal was so mad and called some prefects and assigned them on each block to remind each class to throw away the rubbish bag before going home. If I remember correctly, you're the one who's on duty today isn't it Han?" Samuel asked with his left corner of his mouth a little upper than the other side. I rolled my eyes in annoyance and groaned because he's correct, I'm the one who's on duty today.

*

"Any updates from her so far?" During the break I decided to spend it with Saff because all of my favorite friends have to meet their own teachers. Actually I was planning to spend it with Aiden but when I was about to walk to his table he's already walking out of the class, even though I was sure he saw me walking toward him. That's when Saff linked his arm into mine and dragged me out of the class to our school pond, suggesting for us to spend the break together.

"No!" Saff cried. Although some people who saw or heard the way he said it may think he's only joking, I can see that he's just pretending to be fine by acting like he's joking.

"She has been absent for three days so far... That's weird... But I believe-" before I could even finish, Saff interrupted me in the middle of my sentence.

"I don't understand! She flirted with me, I flirted with her back! I asked her if it's fine and she said she likes and enjoys it! When I said that I was craving for chocolates, the next day she gifted me a box of chocolates with a self written letter! She even ended the letter with 'these chocolates contain my sweetest love<3'! Isn't that the most obvious and ultimate sign that she also likes me back?! Now why? Why when I finally decided to confess, she ghosted me? Purposely escaping school because she knows that I will ask her about the confession!" He said in a full rage. So loud to be exact. Every student who was passing the pond stared at him before leaving the place.

"I'm sorry. It's just that, no other girl has ever made me fall this hard before. She is hard to get. She's not like other girls who fall for me the second they look at me." I rolled my eyes in disgust.

"She caught my attention so much and when she continuously led me on, even when she ghosted me, even if I wanted to hate her, even if I wanted to uncrush her, I just can't. I just... have fallen for her so bad." Saff continued. I was so into what Saff said because I could relate to him. Even if Aiden keeps leading me on, I just can't help but to keep loving him. Even after he said he has a crush towards a girl, I still have crush on him, and it's mentally exhausting.

*

It's already time to go back home and I had to do what I had already promised to Samuel. I packed my stuff until someone stood in front of me. I stopped what I was doing and looked at him.

"I have somewhere to go before going home. Mum and dad will have a business meeting tonight so cook only yourself dinner, don't cook for two. I will eat outside." He left just like that. As if I am not the person who let him stay with me. Fadly who is beside me also finds it weird. I just shook my head when he asked me about the reason why Aiden was like that.

I was left alone in the class, tying up the plastic waste bags. After I finished, I wore my bag and brought the plastic waste with me. It will be thrown to a much bigger trash bin which the cleaners will bring it to the outside of the school for the garbage truck. When I opened the bigger trash bin, I couldn't fit the plastic waste bag into it as it's already full. I turned to my left to see a slightly smaller trash bin without a cap, only half filled. When I was about to throw the plastic waste bag into it, I saw several letters envelopes in it.

The amount of them is unnatural and odd. Curious, I dropped the plastic bag and took some of the letters from the bin. My eyes widened when I saw the letters were dedicated to who.

"Me?!" Both my eyebrows are now close together and my forehead started to get wrinkly. I'm so confused. Suddenly a group of juniors called me from behind.

"Umm... Han?" I turned to my back.

"Oh? Why?"

"We were wondering... Is the rumor of you dating Saff real?" They asked in a worried face.

"Obviously no. Saff and I are just starting to get closer, but nothing more than just a friend!" I explained.

They all sighed and laughed in relief. It felt awkward to end the conversation just that way so I decided to ask them "why?"

"Because we sent you letters but you didn't answer us. We sent you some yesterday, we said that we would appreciate it if you could tell us by today's morning... It seems like you didn't read our letters..."

I started to get really confused. It just doesn't add up. The wrinkles on my forehead are now back and my eyebrows are now very close together.

"I'm sorry but I didn't receive any letters yesterday... What are you guys saying?" I was confused.

"We didn't directly give them to you yesterday because you weren't there in the morning. We were told that you went to school early so today we decided to arrive much earlier so that you could receive our letters, yet you are still not there." One of them explained. Early? Pretty sure I arrived later than usual yesterday. Deeply curious, I asked them who told them that and their answer surprised me.

"Aiden told us. He's also the one who collected our letters. He promised us that he will give the letters to you. How can you say you didn't received any letters Han?" I don't know what to say. It felt like my tongue was tied because of a surprising sudden news. However the boys seem like they are not giving up on my answer and still standing, waiting patiently for my answer.

"I don't know what Aiden told you guys, but I didn't received any single letters from yesterday till today. I'll try to ask Aiden later to listen to his explanation. Also thank you for writing me letters with your guys' poetic words and beautiful uses of metaphor. I appreciate it." I gave them compliments so that they will think about their crush compliment them instead of thinking about what happened to their letters. I waved them goodbye and quickly ran to my father's car who's probably been waiting for a very long time. I also brought some letters from the trash bin with me to home, ignoring the fact that they are from trash.