But it wasn't until the word bride suddenly appeared that Karuizawa Megumi suddenly understood.
Even she has desires and a career she wants to be.
"cold..."
Karuizawa Megumi hugged her skirt and squatted there slowly. As soon as the name appeared in her mind, her heartbeat would speed up unconsciously, as if she wanted to shout "Wow", and she would feel an inexplicable itch in her heart. Unbearable strange feeling.
As long as Kitagawa Ryo is by her side, she will have a strong sense of security.
Can she define this feeling as "like"?
In this empty corridor, Karuizawa Megumi suddenly calmed down.
"Then why, in the six months after Ryo left, did I only think of Ryo after being bullied?"
In fact, in the three months after Kitagawa Ryo broke off contact with Karuizawa Megumi, Karuizawa Megumi had been enjoying her status as the core of the class. At that time, she didn't even notice what Ryo did to her after he left. A bad influence, as if she could survive independently of the other person.
but.
Karuizawa Megumi closed her eyes in pain. When Kitagawa Ryo suddenly appeared in front of her yesterday and pulled her away from the tilted cup of American coffee, she really experienced the long-lost sense of security and dependence again. , so much so that he would hug Kitagawa Ryo and cry, and would give him a gentle kiss on his neck.
Now Karuizawa Megumi no longer knows which of his feelings are true and which are simply derived illusions, which are deceiving himself because he longs for the other person's protection.
"fraud..."
Karuizawa Megumi whispered to herself there that she had read about the "suspension bridge effect". This psychology means that when a person is nervously crossing a suspension bridge, his heartbeat will involuntarily speed up. If he happens to meet another person at this time, he will misunderstand the accelerated heartbeat caused by this situation as the physiological reaction of the other person to make his heart beat, so he will develop feelings of love for the other person. Generally speaking, " Many scenes of heroes saving beauties are affected by the "suspension bridge effect".
"Too strange..."
After being bullied at school for a long time, I was saved by Ryo, so there is no problem in falling in love with Ryo.
Karuizawa Megumi shook her head and bit her lip in frustration. She desperately tried to find evidence to prove that she really liked Ryo. It was not because she wanted to seek so-called asylum, it was not because she could not survive alone, and it was not because of Kitagawa. Liang is a person who is willing to be sent by herself...
She absolutely cannot admit this, because once she admits it, Karuizawa Megumi will have no way to face Kitagawa Ryo again.
Who would call this twisted emotion "love"?
Karuizawa Megumi stared at herself reflected on the wall hatefully. The girl had a cute face, but Karuizawa Megumi knew clearly how many ugly and difficult-to-remove scars were hidden under this body, even if some They have been washed away by time, but they are still engraved in Karuizawa Megumi's heart. Thinking about it this way, she hates herself even more for being cute but having no talent, no will, and no way to protect herself.
if you can.
Karuizawa Megumi touched her face on the wall. She really wanted to do it all over again, from the very beginning.
She must work hard to hone herself, not be bullied by anyone, grow up healthily, and then - fall in love again, and fall in love with him normally.
This may also be a weak and evasive idea. Karuizawa Megumi doesn't even have the idea of changing from now on.
It didn't matter anyway, Karuizawa Megumi stood up.
No matter whether her love is true or false, the only thing she can do now is to stay by Kitagawa Ryo's side. Karuizawa Megumi has long been unable to be independent and fragile.
----------------------------------------
"In a blink of an eye, I didn't see Hui anymore. It turned out that I was looking for a place to change into new clothes."
Kitagawa Ryo followed the map navigation on his mobile phone and returned to the clothing store where he had been in the morning. He happened to bump into Karuizawa Megumi who had just put on the black dress and came out.
"Because Ryo said I look good in it, so let Ryo look at it more often."
Karuizawa Megumi took over Kitagawa Ryo's words with a smile. Compared with her coy saying that she didn't want it in the morning, Karuizawa Megumi now looked particularly confident. She turned around in front of Kitagawa Ryo without flinching. Show off:
"Ryo's pupils are the same color."
"It seems so."
Kitagawa Ryo was a little surprised that Karuizawa Megumi didn't mention the topic of his meeting with Horikita Suzune at noon. Obviously Kitagawa Ryo himself remembered that when Horikita Suzune said the word "engagement", Karuizawa Megumi's reaction seemed It was quite loud, but it seemed that such a big movement was only for a moment, and I didn't hear much after that.
However, Kitagawa Ryo himself had no guilty conscience. He made his thoughts clear to Horikita Suzune right away:
The engagement is just an agreement between the previous generation. If neither of them has the will to do so, they don't have to worry about it. Even Horikita Suzune only needs to express her position a little, and Kitagawa Ryo can take care of the rest. Handle it yourself.
What Kitagawa Ryo didn't expect was that Horikita Suzune's attitude was a bit strange. The other party didn't express her rejection clearly at the first time. Instead, she said that because she was a good friend of the school, she wanted to know more about herself. An opportunity to learn about Horikita Manabu's preferences.
Kitagawa Ryo was naturally resigned to this inexplicable obsession. Now he was really curious about what strange impression Horikita Manabu left on Horikita Suzune, so that he would still miss him like this two years after he left. .
In short, it was such a short conversation. Kitagawa Ryo later chatted with Horikita Suzune about some conceptual matters, and finally used the book "Crime and Punishment" as an entry point to talk about some views on literature. , Kitagawa Ryo felt that he had completed the mission of his parents and Horikita Manabu.
I don't know whether it was because I was a little bothered by the conversation at noon, or whether I simply didn't have much energy because I didn't take a nap. After visiting two stores for a while, even Kitagawa Ryo himself felt a little bit uninterested. It happened that Karuizawa Megumi also made a request carefully. After resting, the two of them found a bench on the roadside and sat down. There happened to be a bus stop next to it. Kitagawa Ryo looked at the bus schedule and passed the time while counting how many stops and which stops.
Suddenly seeing a familiar place name, Kitagawa Ryoya's eyes lit up and he pointed it out to Karuizawa Megumi:
"Megumi remember this park?"
Karuizawa Megumi tilted her head and leaned close to Kitagawa Ryo's head to look at:
"I seem to have some impression...Have Ryo and I been there before?"
"It should be. I still remember there is a temple on the mountainside over there."
Beichuan Liangyan nodded decisively, supported his head with his right hand and said:
"I remember Hui took me there. To be honest, it was the first time I took a bus for so many stops in one go. I felt so far away from home, and I was worried that I wouldn't be able to go back."
"Ryo was still afraid of this at that time."
Karuizawa Megumi laughed, as if he couldn't believe it.
"After all, in my impression, Ryo is a childhood sweetheart who can do anything."
"How can there be anything omnipotent? There are always things that a person cannot do."
Kitagawa Ryo said as he unzipped his jacket, then took it off and put it on backwards, showing the zipper on the back to Karuizawa Megumi:
"You see, if you are alone, there is no way to zip up the back by yourself."
As he spoke, he put his right hand comically behind his back, trying to pull the zipper up, but there was nothing he could do when he pulled it halfway.
"Ryo, you look so stupid..."
When Karuizawa Megumi saw the eyes of the people around him gathering here, he quickly reminded:
"Put it back on quickly."
After Kitagawa Ryo put his jacket back on, he said with a smile:
"Right, so I also asked Horikita to do this action at noon. Who told her to insist on something? She can survive alone and does not need others."
"The results of it?"
Kitagawa Ryo shrugged, remembering the way Horikita Suzune blushed at noon and refused to admit defeat, desperately trying to pull up the zipper.
"By the way, let's go to the pet store."
As if he had a good idea, Kitagawa Ryo suddenly stood up:
"Do you plan to raise a cat or a dog? Hui? I will buy enough cat or dog food for you in advance. If you get sick, I also know the director of a pet hospital. In this case, even if you are Megumi will have a partner after I leave."
In fact, Karuizawa Megumi could tell at a glance that Kitagawa Ryo had been prepared, so she simply brought a colluded surprise and excitement:
"Okay, okay, I also like cats and dogs."
Anyway, what she has to do now is to accept all the gifts from Kitagawa Ryo. She wants to establish a deeper and closer relationship with Kitagawa Ryo until the fate of the two people is completely entangled. It seems that only in this way can she feel at ease, even if Kitagawa Ryo really ran away one day, and Karuizawa Kei was able to pull him back to her along the rope.
Half an hour later, Karuizawa Megumi saw this beautiful white cat with fire-colored pupils. After seeing Kitagawa Ryo and Karuizawa Megumi, it also rubbed its hazy fire-colored eyes with its little paws and shook its head. The furry tail came close to Kitagawa Ryo's fingers and acted coquettishly.
"What do you think of the name 'Hotaro'?"
Kitagawa Ryo held it and handed it into Karuizawa Megumi's arms.
"It's a very nice name, I like it very much."
Karuizawa Megumi took Hotaru gently, and she played with the white cat's little paws. Hotaru was not fierce at all.
"Then Hotaru will be Kei's cat from now on."
Kitagawa Ryo looked at Karuizawa Keiya's loving expression and made a conclusion with satisfaction.
"I think this should be the cat that Ryo and I had together."
Karuizawa Megumi raised Hotaru's little paw and danced cutely in front of Kitagawa Ryo's eyes.
"Isn't it?"
Her eyes were full of smiles.
I don't have to lie, why should I lie.
[Plot CG: Lying, reading is over. ]
ps: I have a full day of classes today, and I only have time to code in the evening. I feel like I can't adjust my schedule back tonight. I'll try to update earlier tomorrow.
ps2: Thanks for reading and subscribing. Regarding the main line, I have already said it before, and I will say it again. After Karuizawa Megumi's two simulations, it will enter the main line, that is, after the second chapter of the simulator is completed.
ps3: This plot CG comes from Lin Youjia's song "Lie", and the theme of this chapter is also Karuizawa Megumi's "Autumn Lies".
The Lies of Autumn by Megumi Karuizawa: Chapter 15: The Little Prince and His Roses
The night when Grandma Emi Emi died of illness, her mother hugged her in the corridor of the hospital, holding her body tightly and crying.
"Why are you crying?"
Emi Eura, who was only ten years old at the time, asked her mother this way.
Her mother was also confused when she was asked this question.
Her mother told her that she would never see her mother again, and Emi Emi would never see her grandmother again. Wouldn't this be uncomfortable?
"Why do you feel uncomfortable?"
Her mother didn't understand how she felt when she asked this question.
"Grandma just died, and we will all die too."
What does it mean? The mother asked Emi Emi in horror, speaking tremblingly as if she couldn't understand her daughter.
"I don't know what the meaning of life is."
Her mother always didn't understand what she said, so Emi Emi sighed.
"I don't understand what life is, and I don't know what it means to live. From the time I was born to now, I don't even have the slightest resonance."
"You never talk about these topics with me."
From a very close distance, Emi Emi's eyes were clear of tears.
It's so dry that I can't even imagine that I just lost a loved one.
"I always avoid talking about life and death, but in the face of life and death, I was told that I should feel uncomfortable."
Emi Emi knelt down and whispered:
"It's always been like this, I don't understand those things. I obviously can't understand, and everyone seems to know it, but I still don't understand. All along, I have learned a lot of knowledge in order to understand those things, but no matter how hard I try, I still can't understand them. I still don't understand...why people want to live."
The mother felt that such a daughter was very pitiful because her father was a gambler and owed a large amount of debt. He would only punch and kick herself when he returned home. Therefore, she and her daughter had not had a relatively stable family environment since they were young. What's more, Not to mention family education.
Emi Eura, who always smiles in front of others and never takes off her mask, uses this behavior to hide herself that is different from others by using a mask to hide herself.
But Emi Eura would occasionally become talkative in front of her mother, and sometimes she would even ask questions very excitedly.
This is the cry of Emi Emi's friction with the world. She is stuck like a broken gear, turning with difficulty.
The discovery of this saddened the mother.
She thought this was a sad thing.
However, she still loves her daughter.
so--
"Today, my classmates and I bullied a girl in the lower grade."
One day, Emi Eura put down her schoolbag and threw herself into the arms of her mother, who was wearing an apron, like a good child who was telling her about her daily school life.
She raised her head and said with a smile:
"I don't know why, but I'm so happy, especially when I see the other person enduring the pain and apologizing to us."
"It's so funny."
Emi Emi stroked the obvious bruise on her mother's arm:
"Mother."
"Um?"
"Am I doing this right?"