"Shizun?" Xue Meng's expression became serious for a few seconds, "He's the only one who doesn't have any nicknames out of everybody on Sisheng Peak. Nobody dares to joke about him." "Bullshit, everyone knows that you like Shizun, so they just all hold their tongues around you." Mo Ran rolled his eyes, pulled Chu Wanning over, and whispered to him loudly, "Don't listen to him, I'll tell you—out of everyone on Sisheng Peak, Yuheng Elder is the one with the most nicknames." "Oh? Really?" Chu Wanning lifted his eyebrows slightly, showing the slightest bit of interest. "For example?" "For example, one of the more courteous ones would be white-clothed ghost."[5] "...Why do they call him that?"
"Because he only wears white clothes every single day." "...What else is there?" "Little napa cabbage." "....Why is that?" "Because he only wears white clothes every single day." "...What else?" "Big mantou." "Why?" "Because he only wears white clothes every single day." "What else is there?" "Little widow." Chu Wanning: "???" "Do you know why they call him that?" Mo Ran was still laughing stupidly,
totally unaware of the flicker of killing intent that flashed in Chu Wanning's eyes,
"It's because he only wears white clothes every single day." "..." If Chu Wanning's temper hadn't been so good, he wouldn't have been able to retain his composure: "What, what else is there?" "Aiyo." Mo Ran glanced at Xue Meng's expression, and whispered softly in a voice that wasn't subtle at all, "If I say any more, I'm afraid that my cousin here might pour the entire hotpot over my head." Xue Meng slapped the table, gnashing his teeth angrily: "That's ridiculous!
Who allowed them to make fun of Shizun like that? What sort of little napa cabbage or big mantou, not to mention little widow? Are they sick of being alive?" "Ah." Mo Ran replied, simmering with laughter, "I can't believe you're already so upset because of these nicknames. You haven't even heard what the female disciples call Shizun, it'll give you goosebumps." Xue Meng's eyes widened: "What do they call him?" Mo Ran drawled lazily: "What else could they call him, they're girls after all— bound to be more refined. Something something like pear blossoms under the pale moon, the spring snows, Sir Chu of Lin An, lotus blossom beauty. My god."[6] Chu Wanning: "..." Xue Meng: "..." "These nicknames are still fine. In comparison, someone like Tanlang Elder with such a terrible temper and average looks has much worse ones." Out of all of the twenty elders on Sisheng Peak, the one that Chu Wanning had the worst relationship with was Tanlang Elder. Chu Wanning asked: "What do they call him?"
"Something like wintertime pickles or mustard greens, because his skin is dark." Mo Ran said, laughing. "MengMeng, don't make that face at me, you have your fair share of nicknames too." Xue Meng looked like he'd just swallowed a whole egg: "What? Me too?" "Of course." Mo Ran said, grinning.
Xue Meng tried to look like he didn't mind, and cleared his throat, asking:
"Well, what do they call me?" "Fanny." "....why?" "What do you mean why, isn't it obvious?" Mo Ran shrugged his shoulders,
uttering those words mirthfully, but couldn't resist anymore, and slapped the table, laughing. "You're like a peacock fanning its tail feathers everywhere,
HAHAHAHAHA—" Xue Meng bounded to his feet, howling in anger: "MO RAN! I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!" By the time the three of them had eaten their fill and drank enough, it was already past midnight. They returned to Sisheng Peak, and Chu Wanning was first sent off by the two stupid disciples to Xuanji Elder's quarters. He bade them farewell. Xue Meng eagerly made plans to meet tomorrow near the bamboo forest, but Chu Wanning didn't know when he might turn back to his original form, and didn't dare to agree. Instead, he said that he'd come meet Xue Meng if he had free time.
Chu Wanning waited until the two disciples had walked far away, and only then did he fly up lightly, stepping along the edges of rooftiles and making his way back towards Red Lotus Pavilion.
The second morning, Chu Wanning woke up, and felt slightly dispirited after seeing that he was still stuck in a child's body.
Chu Wanning stayed stone-faced, stepping onto a wooden stool, and stared at the person in the mirror for a long while. He felt as though he didn't have the motivation to comb his hair properly. After mulling things over, he felt like he couldn't take it anymore, and immediately went to find Xue Zhengyong.
"What? You saw Meng-er and Ran-er yesterday?" "Right, I said that I was Xuanji Elder's disciple, and they didn't seem to doubt it." Chu Wanning said, "But if Xue Meng comes to ask you, please remember to cover for me. But more importantly, I've already cultivated for more than ten days, and nothing has really changed. This isn't working, I'll have to ask Tanlang to take a look after all." "Oho, our Yuheng Elder and his thin face is suddenly not worried about losing face?" Chu Wanning shot him a cold glance. However, such a look coming from a young child wasn't imposing at all, but rather looked like the child was throwing a fit.
Chu Wanning was quite adorable as a child, and Xue Zhengyong couldn't help but to be slightly moved, reaching out to pat his head.
Chu Wanning suddenly said: "Sect Leader, when my body returns to normal,
could you ask HuanSha Hall to tailor me a new set of Sisheng Peak robes? Not white."
Xue Zhengyong froze in shock: "I thought you didn't like wearing light armour?" "Occasionally changing appearance is good too." Chu Wanning said with a dark expression as he walked away.
Although Tanlang Elder wasn't on good terms with Chu Wanning, he had to hold himself back a little bit in the presence of their sect leader. He didn't sneer at Chu Wanning openly, but it was clear what he was thinking from his eyes.
Chu Wanning looked up at Tanlang Elder expressionlessly.
Tanlang's eyes were shining with glee, almost like there were fireworks going off in there.
Chu Wanning : "..." "Madam Wang's diagnosis was more or less correct." Tanlang Elder let go of Chu Wanning's wrist after taking his pulse, and Chu Wanning immediately yanked his hand away and tugged his sleeve back down.
"Then why has it been ten days without any change?" Tanlang responded: "Although you didn't come into contract with much sap from the ancient willow tree, its effects are still pretty strong, so I'm afraid that it might take quite a long time to return to your original form." "How long will it take?" Chu Wanning casually asked him casually.
Tanlang said: "Not sure, but probably about ten years." Chu Wanning's eyes widened immediately. Tanlang Elder tried his best to keep a straight face, but his eyes were brimming with glee at Chu Wanning's misfortune: "Yup, you're gonna need ten years to return to your original form." Chu Wanning stared at him for a while, then said gloomily: "Are you misleading me?" "Perish the thought, I wouldn't dare mislead the great Yuheng Elder." Tanlang said with a smile, "Anyway, if you ask me, this is just fine. You're body's just smaller, your mentality slightly younger—just a tiny bit—and besides, your cultivation is unaffected, what's the rush to go back to normal?" Chu Wanning, ashen-faced, was speechless for a while.
Tanlang continued: "However, during these ten years, there's no guarantee that you'll take the form of a child the entire time. This type of tree sap migrates along the same paths as your spiritual energy, so if you don't use any spiritual techniques for three to five months, you should be able to turn back to your original form." "That works too!" Xue Zhengyong's eyes lit up as if he was seeing the first light of dawn.
But Tanlang smiled and continued: "Sect Leader, don't be in such a rush, I'm not done explaining yet. Even after Yuheng Elder returns to his adult form, he still won't be able to use too many techniques, because once his spiritual energy becomes depleted from overuse, the willow sap will be able to exert its influence again, and he'll turn back into a child." "Overuse? So how much would count as too much?" Xue Zheng Yong exclaimed.
"About that, since the sap has already spread throughout his entire body." Tanlang said, "At most, he'd only be able to use two moves per day." Chu Wanning spoke in a voice that was cold and hard as steel, "The boundary to the ghost realm develops breaches that need repairing all the time, forging golems also uses spiritual energy. if I can only use two moves a day, I would be as good as useless." "Well that's all I got." Tanlang replied sarcastically, "After all, if the human realm suffered the loss of the Beidou Immortal, even the sun might not rise in the west tomorrow." Xue Zhengyong fretted with worry: "Tanlang, quit it with the sarcasm already.
Out of the entire cultivation world, your medical techniques are up there, please think of something. Even if Yuheng's cultivation hasn't been affected, he's still in a child's body, so his abilities definitely aren't the same as before. Not to mention, if the other sects hear that Yuheng was injured at Jincheng Lake, they might think to try something funny. Ten years is way too long, could you look for some medicines or something, that could maybe..." Tanlang Elder sneered and interrupted him mid-sentence: "Sect Leader, the sap that the Beidou Immortal was infected with is from an ancient spiritual tree,
not some common poison. Do you really think that I can just come up with a cure on the spot?" Xue Zhengyong: "..." "That's enough for now, I have to go extract medicine for pills." Tanlang said languidly, "Why don't you two see yourselves out." Xue Zhengyong: "Tanlang!" He still wanted to say something, but Chu Wanning pulled on the hem of his robes, and said, "Sect Leader, let's go." When they reached the door, Tanlang's voice suddenly floated over from behind.
"Chu Wanning, if you're willing to beg me properly and humbly, then who knows? I might be willing to help derive a cure for you. Although I've never seen someone with your condition before, I might not necessarily be unable to help.
So why don't you think about it carefully?" "..." Chu Wanning looked backwards and replied, "What would count as properly and humbly?" Tanlang reclined on the couch, lazily sorting out the bundles of silver needles on the table, and raised his eyes at the sound of Chu Wanning's voice, disdain apparent in his eyes: "When other people are at the end of their ropes, they get on their knees to prostrate themselves and beg for help. We're colleagues, so I won't ask you to get down and knock your head on the floor, but if you kneel and say some nice words towards me, then I'll help you." Chu Wanning said nothing, only gazing indifferently at him.
Only after a while did he say: "Wintertime pickles, you must be dreaming." With that, Chu Wanning flicked his sleeves and left. Tanlang Elder was left there in a daze to figure out what wintertime pickles meant.
The days trickled by slowly. Yuheng Elder declared that he was going into seclusion to meditate, when actually, he was stuck in the body of a child and couldn't return to his original form. Xue Zheng Yong, Madam Wang, and Tanlang Elder found out about it one after another, and, to prevent the secret from being exposed, Xuanji Elder was also informed.
A few months passed in the blink of an eye, Red Lotus Pavillion's doors had been closed to visitors for quite a while, and Xue Meng and the others couldn't help but to be worried.
"Shizun has been in seclusion for more than seventy days now, why hasn't he come out yet?"
"Maybe he's refining his cultivation level." Shi Mei took a sip of spiritual mountain dew from his cup, and looked up at the dark, overcast skies outside the window, "It's going to snow, and soon it will be the new year, I wonder if Shizun will come out before then." Mo Ran was flipping lazily through a manual of sword techniques, and upon hearing Shimei's words, said, "Probably not. Didn't he send us a message with his haitang flower a couple days ago to say that it would be a while yet? I doubt he'll be out in time." It was a rest day on Sisheng peak, when the disciples didn't need to practice cultivation. Mo Ran and the other two were gathered together to enjoy some freshly brewed tea and warmed wine. The bamboo curtains of the small pavillion in the yard were half drawn, the heavy curtains concealing its occupants, and steam wafted lightly from beneath.
Lately, there's been a new addition who often hangs out with them—Xuanji Elder's disciple, Xia Sini.
Ever since that day when he met Xue Meng, Xue Meng had dragged him over to cultivate or play together every couple of days, and before long, the group had become inseparable.
And so, Yuheng Elder's group of three disciples mysteriously got a fourth.
At this moment, Chu Wanning, assuming the name Xia Sini, was seated in front of the table eating pastries. He ate in a refined manner, but the speed at which he ate wasn't lacking at all.
Xue Meng glanced at him inadverdently, paused in surprise, then his gaze doubled back to the plate and he uttered in surprise: "Wow, little shidi, who'd you inherit this bottomless stomach from?" Chu Wanning was chewing leisurely on a piece of osmanthus cake. The cake was delicious, and he didn't bother responding to Xue Meng; after all, there was somebody fighting over the food with him.
Mo Ran and Chu Wanning's hands landed on the last piece of crispy lotus pastry at the same time. Their eyes shot up, and it seemed as if there was lightning crackling between their gazes.
Chu Wanning: "Let go." Mo Ran: "Nope." "Hands off." "You've already eaten eight pieces, this one is mine." "You can have any of the other ones, just not the lotus pastry." Mo Ran glared at the little fellow for a while before pulling out his trump card:
"Shidi, if you eat too many sweets you'll get cavities." "That's fine." Chu Wanning was very calm, "I'm six, it wouldn't be embarrassing." Mo Ran "...…" There was a loud 'PA!' as Xue Meng's slap landed alongside his scathing complaints: "Mo Weiyu how annoying can you get, how old are you already, to still fight Shidi for food???"
The moment Mo Ran covered his head with an "Aiyo," Chu Wanning had already swiftly snatched the lotus pastry, hands quick and face expressionless,
feeling quite satisfied as he took a small bite.
"Shidi——!!!!!!!!!!" Chu Wanning ignored him, totally devoted to nibbling on his sweets.
The four of them were busy making a ruckus when a sharp whistling sound pierced through the skies, reverberating throughout all of ShiSheng Peak. Chu Wanning's face fell: "The gathering whistle?" Xue Meng lifted up the hanging curtains halfway to look outside the window.
The other disciples who had been walking outside also stopped in their tracks to look around with expressions of surprise.
At the sound of the gathering whistle, everyone at Sisheng Peak must gather outside in the square in front of DanQing Hall. This also meant that the whistle would only be blown when there was an emergency. Before Chu Wanning joined the sect, this whistle had sounded often whenever the ghost realm barrier had been breached. But since Chu Wanning's joining, the whistle hadn't been heard for a long time.
Shi Mei put down the book in his hand and got up to walk to Xue Meng's side: "How strange, what could be so urgent?" "Don't know. No point wondering, let's just go take a look first." Only Mo Ran was silent. He pressed his lips together, and his eyelashes fluttered downwards, covering the flicker of something unnatural flashing across his eyes. He knew what this whistle foretold, but the timing was slightly different than he remembered, he didn't think that it would happen this soon...
The four of them arrived at Sisheng Peak, and the other disciples also came one after another. Before long, the entirety of Loyalty Square was filled with all of the elders and their disciples.
Once everyone had gathered, Xue Zhengyong walked out from the tightlyshut doors of Loyalty Hall to stand before the jade-banded platform railing,
above flights of limestone steps. Six beautiful women followed behind him, some charming looking, others cold seeming, but all were impossibly gorgeous. They stood against the wind, wearing only thin muslin robes in such bitterly cold weather, and at a glance, their red skirts were like the clouds at dawn, their eyes seemed lit with scarlet flames amidst the delicate fluttering of silken ribbons, and the space between each of their eyebrows was marked with a crimson blaze.
Xue Meng was stunned.
Not only him——the expressions of just about every person in the square changed upon seeing the six women. Xue Meng stared blankly for a long time before he managed to speak with a trembling voice: "Envoys of the feathered tribe…... did, did they come from Zhuque[7], the land of immortals?"
Author's Notes:
Mini theatre "How to make you happy" Sisheng Peak disciple A wants to join under the teachings of Chu Wanning.
But heard the elder is very rigid, thus decided to ask the three shixiongs for advice.
Disciple A: Hello young master! I'm disciple A! What should I do to make elder Yuheng happy?
Xue Meng: First, you need to be strict with yourself, be keen on your studies with diligence, then you need to brace the cold winds and not be swayed with difficulty, lastly you need to be hard-wearing. If Shizun strikes your left cheek,
remember to present your right cheek, if Shizun wants to cut off your left leg,
remember to stick out your right leg too.
Disciple A felt despair, thus he went to Shi Mingjing for help.
Shi Mei: To make Shizun happy? Very easy, you just need to remember drinking wine he likes to drink pear blossom wine eating fish he likes to eat lake perch three pieces of tang yuan is just enough rice wine pudding ten bowls is not too little cold winters he likes to steep tea there needs to be a lot of rose petals in tea barbeque meat has to have a sprinkle of cumin there can't be a single piece of chili…
Disciple A: ...…
He only had his last savior Mo Weiyu left.
Mo Ran: Oh, no problem, my method is really easy.
Disciple A: What is it?
Mo Ran: Sleep him.
Disciple A: ...….
Mo Ran: If once is not enough then twice, if twice is not enough then ten times….
Disciple A: I'm afraid the next day after the first time I will be put on the cucking stool.
Mo Ran: ? Who said to allow him to be able to get out of bed the next day?
At what rate did you think I meant when I said if twice is not enough then ten times?
Disciple: W-What rate?
Mo Ran: The whole night.
Disciple A, in the end, abandoned the thought.
[5] Reference to two deities who reward the good and punish the bad, 黑白无常 (one of them is clothed in white and the other is clothed in black.)
[6] 阳春白雪/the spring snows reference in the girls' nicknames is supposed to be a fancy ancient song from the warring states period from the state of Chu or smth so a ref to shizuns name?? Also miss meatbun makes a reference to 西子 is another name for 西施 who is supposed to be one of the four legendary beauties of ancient cn??? so essentially this reference is comparing shizun to one of the 4 famous beauties of ancient cn/saying he's very beautiful, could sway emperors with his beauty ;^)
[7] 朱雀 Vermillion Bird/Phoenix, one of four mythical beasts