epilogue

Leaving Aqua to her chaos, Serena led me out of the Guild and over to an abandoned side alley far from the middle of town. About the only shop around here was a certain magical-item place that didn't attract many customers. If she just wanted to talk to me alone, a café would have sufficed… Serena seemed to sense my suspicion, because she smiled. "I confess, it's not the sort of thing one would wish to discuss in a café…" She glanced around, then sat down on the roadside. "Not many people come by here, and if someone does, we can just change the subject. Yes, I think this would be the best place for a nice quiet chat."

Her smile vanished, replaced by a look of total seriousness.

Her story was quite the tragedy. And not one that could be summed up in a couple of words. No one who heard it could have felt anything but pity and sorrow for her.

"…And finally, that person was swallowed up by a dark power… That was when they gained the name by which the world knows them to this day. The Demon King. The Demon King doesn't personally wish to harm the people of this world…!"

"That's a hell of a story… To think, some manga-like crap like that would actually happen…!" I was feeling a little bit shocked.

Serena looked puzzled. "'Manga'…? …In any event, that's how a beautiful woman came to be known as the Demon King. She's under a curse that makes her hideous and repugnant, but that curse is on the cusp of being broken… Please, Sir Kazuma, you are the one chosen by the gods. I know you must long to defeat the archfiend who torments all peoples. But the Demon King was once a pitiful young woman herself! Could I not ask you to put off destroying her? And if you say you simply cannot…! If you simply must destroy the Demon King, please let me join your party and bring me to her…!" Serena grasped my hands and looked at me beseechingly.

What a dramatic twist…! This was it! This was what I'd wanted from this world all along…! Not a goddess who gets eaten by frogs or a general of the Demon King who puts sugar on the crusts of his bread. Not having to run away from cabbages or do manual labor even though I was supposed to be an adventurer.

Not cat-eared orcs or fake elves…et cetera… Yeah…everything had been wrong up until now. But even this world had a dramatic tragedy, a genuine fantasy tale waiting in it…! Yeah! It was everyone around me who had been nuts all along…!

"Hold on a moment, though. Serena, what makes you think the gods chose me? I want to be clear here. The only real reason I was involved in defeating all those bounty heads and generals and stuff was pretty much dumb luck."

Serena closed her eyes and shook her head gently. "I had a flash of insight the moment I heard your name. Do you know something, Sir Kazuma? Every once in a great while, a person of tremendous power appears in this world. They might be immensely intelligent or physically strong. They might have exceptional magical power or an unusual weapon. The exact manifestation varies, but they share one thing. The Demon King is very afraid of all of them."

The light bulb came on. She was talking about the cheaters from Japan.

"Yeah, um, I think I know what you mean. Did you believe I was one of them just because of my kind of unusual name? I'm real sorry, but I don't have any special power…" "No, it wasn't because of your strange name!" Serena burst out. "It's true, those with special powers frequently have unusual names. But what led me to believe you were truly special…! It was the legendary swordsman who once posed such a threat to the Demon King. The moment I heard your name, I knew. I knew you were a descendant of that swordsman!"

What—me?!

...… "…Wait, why is that again?"

"It's your name, Satou. That was the name of the legendary sword fighter.

Could that possibly be coincidence? No, it cannot!"

Uh, Satou's one of the most common names where I come from. I bet that guy's totally unrelated to me.

But anyway.

"Look, Serena. I'm sorry, but there's one unavoidable fact: I'm an Adventurer, the weakest class. All that stuff you just said was exciting, for sure, and it sounds really cool. But look, defeating the Demon King just isn't something I'm going to do. I don't want to, and I'm not strong enough. Besides, if what you just said is true, isn't the curse on that beautiful woman about to break anyway? No way. Not happening. I don't have it in me to kill anyone. I can barely finish off humanoid monsters."

I knew I sounded pathetic, and I was sure Serena would be disappointed. But to my surprise, she looked downright relieved. "Powerless? Such humility… But I see… Very well. Heh, Sir Kazuma, you're a very kind man." She smiled at me as she spoke. Then she gave me a deep bow. "Very well, then, I shall—" "Seresdina? Seresdina, is that you?!" someone exclaimed, interrupting our tender good-bye. It was… "Oh, and Kazuma, too! What are you both doing here? My goodness, Kazuma, you certainly do have an affinity for generals of the Demon King! Me, Vanir, Seresdina! The two of you seem to be getting along famously."

It was the owner of the only store around here, the magical-item shop—Wiz.

"…Are you quite sure you have the right person? I'm a priest named Serena.

You seem to have me confused with someone else."

"Since you've come all the way to Axel, Seresdina, won't you stop by my shop? Kazuma, you come, too. I'll make tea!"

Wiz hardly seemed to realize she was completely ignoring Serena's attempt to throw her off. Serena smiled and said to me, "Sir Kazuma, do you know this woman? Perhaps you could tell her she's got the wrong person."

"Seresdina, why won't you look at me? And why are you affecting such an elevated way of talking? You can't have forgotten me, can you? It's me, Wiz!

The Demon King let me live at the castle, remember? I was your colleague!"

Wiz took Serena by the shoulders and started shaking her, but she just kept smiling. Finally, unable to take it anymore, she peeled Wiz's hands off her.

"Geez… Would you stop that? I am Serena, and this Seres-whoever-she-is who you keep talking about is someone else, so won't you please leave me alone?"

Wiz gasped. "What are you saying? You're obviously Seresdina, from every angle! Seresdina, the Dark Priest! The expert strategist, the one who takes advantage of her status as the lone human among the Demon King's followers to infiltrate human towns!"

"I think I see some split ends in your hair! Let me fix them for you! Heal!

Heal!"

"Ow! That hurts! S-Seresdina, what are you doing?! Ooooh, I don't like it!

Fine, forget about it. I was going to show you an interesting item I just got in stock, but forget it…! Kazuma, do come visit me when you have a chance, won't you?" Wiz, remaining polite to me to the very end, stormed off back to her shop.

Serena watched her go, then brought her hands together as if trying to calm herself. "…What a very odd woman," she said. "When I cast Heal on her, she started to smoke."

"Well, she is a Lich. But I assume you already knew that, Seresdina," I said.

Serena smiled at me, hoping I wouldn't press, and I smiled back at her. She didn't flinch. I have to say, I was impressed. Eventually, Serena looked down at the ground before looking back up at me with conviction.

"I swear it's not like that!"

"Huh."

So she still wasn't going to give up. She was committed; I had to give her that.

"It's true, as she says, that I'm Seresdina, a general of the Demon King. But you must listen to me. The story I told you was true! I'm the older sister of the girl who was transformed by the curse into the Demon King. My desperate desire to rescue my beloved sister led me into the archfiend's service! Ahhh… Even now, thinking of my sister makes me—!"

That's when it happened. Smack in the middle of Serena's impassioned performance, a tall man showed up behind her.

"Thinking of your little sister? O you, man who's worried that this woman has been interrupted just at the best part and wonders if there is indeed a curse.

Only moments ago, my shopkeeper who happily orders the most ridiculous junk came in disappointed, to inform me that you were nearby. In gratitude, I shall address your concern. Won't you come to our shop?"

Serena must have recognized the voice, because she flinched. It belonged to another of the Demon King's former generals, the masked demon Vanir. Slowly, ever so slowly, Serena turned around, and her eyes met Vanir's.

"...…H-hello and pleased to meet you. My name is Serena. Are you an acquaintance of Sir Kazuma's? Ahem, Sir Kazuma, it seems you're quite a busy man, so I think I'll take my leave…" "Pleased to pretend to meet you, O pure and not-remotely-suspicious-in-any-way priest. Goodness, don't be in such a hurry to leave. As a sign of goodwill, I believe I'll provide you with a most refreshing item our shopkeeper (so recently turned into a chunk of charcoal) happily got in stock."

Serena looked openly relieved at this. Vanir produced something that looked a bit like a cup of shaved ice. "Behold, today's recommendation! Perfect for the adventurer out in the field, this is Insect Choleran. Don't be fooled by the adorable name; its power is immense. It casts a potent death curse on the immediate area, effective against anything smaller than a rat. Which is to say, place it by your pillow, and you need not fear the bedbugs biting!"

""Huh?!"" Serena and I both said in spite of ourselves. I guess there were mosquitoes and stuff in this world, too. It wasn't a problem for me at the moment, but that thing actually sounded pretty useful. But then again… "There's gotta be some nasty side effect, right? Like, sometimes it kills people, too, or something?"

"Perish the thought. It doesn't work on any living being larger than a rat. Only rats and smaller creatures die," Vanir responded with unusual frankness. Geez, it was starting to seem pretty good… "That's perfect! You mean the quick little dark-shelled Kings of Fear that run around by my pillow would die, too?! I'll take one…!"

"Pleasure doing business!"

Serena's appraisal gave me pause. "…Yo, Vanir, you mean anything smaller than a rat will die, not just bugs?"

"Absolutely," Vanir replied.

"…Okay, so what about the bacteria and stuff inside a human body?"

"Dead as a doornail."

What a piece of junk! I didn't know much about bacteria or mitochondria or whatever, but I was getting the feeling this thing wasn't worth my time.

Serena hesitantly tried to back out of the deal, but Vanir said, "Careful, O first-time customer. As a businessman, I guard the personal information of my customers in complete secrecy, but if you return that, you will no longer be a customer. Hmm, I see it. Yes, I see someone's future… Someone turned into a punching bag by the other adventurers after a certain masked gentleman reveals all about them…" "I'll buy it! I'll take it immediately! How much?!"

I felt sorry for her.

"Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, I am in unusually high spirits today, because for once, the junk acquired by my witless shopkeeper has proven valuable! Normally I would charge you 400,000 eris for this item, but today, including a special getting-to-know-you price and a good-spirits discount, I'll make it 1,200,000 eris! That's eight hundred eris less!"

"That's more expensive, you bastard! How do you know exactly how much money I have anyway? Don't you go seeing things about me!" Serena shouted, but nonetheless she flung her wallet at Vanir. Suddenly, she sounded like a particularly lowbrow adventurer.

Vanir caught the wallet out of the air, saying, "Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, see you then, boy! Incidentally, O short-tempered first-timer! Your bad vibes are delicious! Absolutely delectable! Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" Laughing merrily, he trotted off toward the shop.

Serena, the general of the Demon King, vacantly watched him go, then said:

"…A-all my money…" …I felt really sorry for her.