CHAPTER 30

Sorting out my thoughts while doing office work is not a healthy work style, if you ask me. One thing will affect another, resulting in no productive result, and the damage will double. I am the guy who doesn't mix up personal and professional, and here I am unnecessarily drifting. The conversation with Azgar is kind of stuck in my mind, word to word, and anything about Ralph will always seal my attention physically and mentally.

When I first laid my eyes on Ralph and started stalking him, I had an idea of their relationship and the soft corner of Ralph toward Asher.

When Ralph was around Asher, there would be drastic changes in his behavior, and the whole persona of Ralph would be more soft, always he was kind of dumbstruck, and pathetically he would shudder, and his eyes would always shine around him.

Ralph would be shining like a sun and would be bright like a bloody moon around Asher.

I hissed at particularly no one when I remembered those moments. I always hated those faces of Ralph when I was stalking him, and my hate toward Asher was even more. Now, hearing the same things from Azgar is like stabbing a knife in the same place again and again. I know it's quite an extreme scenario considering my character getting stabbed, which is highly impossible; in the same place you wish. Still, I could pretend I am feeling that way, right?

I was trying my best to float in the misery that was thrown by Azgar when the cabin door burst open. My anger was riled to a high degree; I wanted to pour everything on the person who entered but halted when I saw the creature, the final touch that I needed for the day. I don't want to deal with this shit right now, but I couldn't hide from him forever.

By closing my eyes, I contemplated running from everything that I was good at, mind you, and again I would bounce back from wherever the heck I was if I heard the word, Ralph. I exhaled harshly. I opened my eyes, greeted by the same creature who had a bloody charming face and wore a smirk that was like adding salt to my misery. Darn my life, face the bloody bastard, and conclude how far you can hold yourself from running.

My gaze finally fell on Asher, who was wearing a black blazer, black pants, shining shoes, and a white shirt where three shirt buttons were open, clearly his white skin radiating. For a few seconds, my gaze was fixed on his bare skin; when I was done, I started to take note of his other features: a sharp jawline, broad shoulder, a well-maintained physique, and my eyes fell on his captivating green eyes, which make you surrender and force you to fall for him at that second. His hair was shining with burgundy just to add even more to his sexiness. He looks damn stunning. No wonder Ralph acted dumbstruck whenever he was around this bastard.

If I had laid my eyes on Asher rather than Ralph, would I have been this compulsive toward Asher? I hummed at the thought, but I don't think I would carve to taste the whole package nor want to slide my precious dick into his or to take his to mine. Maybe a one-night stand if I am damn desperate to release when I didn't find any other option, maybe then. I chuckle at that.

My craving was always Ralph's, and I bet it always would be. When an invitation was thrown at my face for a one-night stand followed by becoming sex buddies, I didn't give a second thought if I had any; also, I would have washed out any thoughts that would hold me back when I imagined Ralph's naked body under me. Just the thought would always rile up like it was doing now.

"Like what you are seeing?" I wanted to retort by saying you wish, but I did like what I saw, but I was not desperate to taste it. If there was any scarcity in male species, then maybe, and again it's highly impossible. I didn't avert my eyes after his bluntness but held my gaze, still studying him, and concluded maybe a one-night stand would only fit that too if he is a bottom, and that's it.

"What do you want?" He occupied the chair that was in front of me by placing one leg on the other one as he spoke. "This is how you are going to treat your new director?" I was in a momentary shock after hearing the news. When I grasped the weight of the statement, I was in a daze. One word that echoed in my mind was 'Director'; my precious self-built life is going to get fucked up at last. Why do I hate and crave bloody money and power? For the sole fucking reason.

This time the snake is biting, not fucking hissing.

I didn't lose my outer composure, but the inner battle of thoughts was severe. Still, I gathered every ounce of courage and spoke. "Come again." Asher leaned on the table with a satisfied smile as if he read my inner thoughts. "I am your new director, and in 24 hours I am going to show your place in this company. I am tired of threatening you, and you never stop sniffing around. You should be grateful that till now it was only verbal and blame yourself for seeking some actions from my side. As you asked for it, I am going to make you pay for sniffing around once again."

He was up to something, and it was definitely going to crush my career. Director so fucking soon, which was not impossible, but how the hell did he become so soon? He continued. "I am holding 51% of the shares of this company; practically, I am the owner, and I have every right to do whatever I want. You should have taken my warning seriously, you know, and should have stopped meddling in Ralph's life. Reece, right, yeah, how many times should I remind you that Ralph is mine and ever will be? Can't you suck it and move on? See what you made me do? I am not the bad guy, so don't blame me. Ralph will come back; by chuckling, I will make him mine in time. So, are we finally clear? And please don't bother to answer; this time I am going to make it loud and clear. I swear I am so done with you fucking classless bastard."

He stood from the chair and glanced at his appearance; by giving a satisfying nod, he started walking toward the door. "I am going to give you a hint: start fucking packing." With that, he left the cabin. Once again, no words were left from my mouth.

It's not the end of the world; I know that by now, but am I doing the right thing? At this point, I am not afraid of my career or falling from my position, but the only thing that matters is the person for whom I am sacrificing everything.

Ralph is worth any sacrifices, but what if he crawled back to Asher?

It's still half past 10 am. I closed my laptop by giving a few instructions to my assistant, I left the company for the day.

I need to sort this out. I can't make a bad move at this moment, and if I did, maybe it would crush more than my career. Just a feeling, but I know. I started driving to my mom's place. She is the only person who knows everything without me disclosing anything in person, but still, she will gather what's going on in my life. My sovereignty in an odd way.

It was a few minutes fast drive. After parking my car, I made my way to her flat. Without knocking, the door was opened, followed by a broad smile. I didn't smile back briefly by hugging her; I entered the flat and made my way directly to the fridge to grab the beer. I need to cool off a bit.

"There is a breakup rumor going on, and definitely you don't have any idea, right?" Of course. It's been two months since I didn't visit her, and when I did, she was curious about something else. What have I done to her? "I don't know." "Really?" "Yes, I don't know anything about any breakup. I want some peace, so please leave me alone." She rolled her eyes. "If you wanted so-called peace, you would never opt for my place, I bet. So, let's be straight, and you need some peace of my mind or something." I huffed.

"I am starving; please can you cook something for me?" "Sure, and I am going to cook extra so you can take some for dinner too." "Thank you." "Can Ralph eat spicy items now? What about his health condition? Is he ok?"

Now this was a real shock, and it's nothing in front of the bomb dropped by that bastard this morning. I was frustratingly annoyed by everyone and everything that was going on around me. I don't have any fucking control, and I so hate it if things are just out of my hand. "Did you install any camera in my flat?" She was making her way to the kitchen, and I was tailing her. "Why would I, when I can easily enter your flat?" Right, but when did she find out? "Help me out." By saying that, she gave vegetables and meat to cut.

"So?" "Nothing." "Spit it out, will you? Please don't keep anything from me again and you already experienced result of your hiding things from me." I sighed. Of course, yes and no. She blatantly blames me for no reason when I have so many reasons of my own. "So?" She is not going to leave me.

I took a long breath to frame my words into sentences. I didn't know what to tell her to make her understand, but somehow, I wanted her to understand and reduce my burden.

"I don't know; things were ok, I was ok, and suddenly I am confused."

She nodded her head and, at the same time, did not get distracted from her cooking.

Did she get my bloody point?

I was silent. My mom passed on some more vegetables, which I took near the sink for washing. She was concentrating more on the cooking part than my vulnerable part. I didn't disclose what I wanted to say entirely, but I feel like something was ripping out, and she was calm as hell. Tasting, adding some more ingredients just to make it better, and totally forgetting about my heart. She is a nuisance when it comes to these things and would always shoo away her unnecessary judgments and thoughts; now, strangely, she is silent.

After completing my task, I leaned on the wall and watched her patiently. She is the only card, and I can't lose her. I can't blame her if she is getting back at me for how I behaved in the past, but it's not the right time. "Common, let's eat." Wow, seriously, that's it. I wanted to yell at her, but she was my only card, and I couldn't risk it. I could be a little more patient.

We arranged the table silently and started having lunch. It doesn't matter when my appetite long died. Her appetite was good; she was eating more than usual. Only if I knew her usual appetite, or was this her usual appetite? Oh god, what the hell am I bothering with? The next day: everything is going to fall from its place in my life. I sighed a thousand times at this lunch table, and my mother was busy savoring the items.

"Clean the table, wash the vessels, and join me." She left the area by giving instruction. I coughed in return.

It took 20 minutes to finish with chores, and after that, she assigned me to do the laundry. After finishing everything, I joined her. She handed me the beer, and I started to gulp.

"I can't keep my eyes on you like I used to. You are grown up, turned 27, I guess, so start making your own decisions and stick to them, or else be a loner, which suits you the most."

She stopped so she could gulp the beer, and I was in shock. What was I exactly expecting from her? In the first place, why did I come here? I was expecting something, and what was it exactly? Consoling words that I am not used to, soothing words—oh, I would rather die than hear those words. Then fucking what?

"I am seeing someone; it's been a few months." I choked on my beer. Damn, this woman manages to get on my nerves so easily. We were civil to each other till now; I should have gotten a bloody hint. Seeing someone seriously? She was preoccupied with her misery after my father's death. How did this happen?

"I didn't get over your dad just to be clear, but I want someone in my life too, so I decided to date." I didn't want to hear anymore, but for sure she is not going to stop until she is done.

"What I am trying to say is a person can get over anyone when she/he can't handle it anymore or is completely done with them, and in my case, I will cherish my memories with your dad and share my love and life with someone who is worthy enough.

You never thought I would move on in my life, but here I am, dating a guy for the past 6 months. I am happy Reece after a long time."

I was dumbfounded to react but her last sentence made me halt the bitchy words that were on the tip of my tongue. She was happy; that was enough for me. I had been wishing her the same thing for the past few years, but she always ignored my suggestions, and I don't know what made her change her decision.

"Reece, when it's high time and he/she is done with bullshit, eventually that person will give up. At that point, no bond, attachment, or number of years of togetherness doesn't count or can stop them."

"Trust me, when that happens, she/he will not turn back, and I really wish Ralph would do that. At present, no one is worthy of being part of his life."

That was a hard slap on my face with no sound nor going to leave any mark.

She stood from the chair and patted my shoulder as she made her way to the room before entering the room. "Please take the food for dinner and enjoy it with him while you still can."