Chapter XXXVII - Sickness (part 1)

I... cannot believe my ears.

"W-What?"

It sounds like he is joking. He must be. But his eyes are serious, and the others as well. They looked at me with a really painful expression. They weren't joking.

"What happened to me?"

I asked Hod with a serious face, and he let out a sigh before he started explaining.

What I am going through is known as the 'Alfeid Magic Sickness'. It is a sickness that happens whenever someone over exerted their magic to the point that it's outside of their capabilities.

The history of this sickness goes far back. When a general of a kingdom, Alfeid, went to single-handedly conquer a Yellow ranked dungeon.

It was said that he was the most powerful knight in his kingdom, and that he was able to take down a Yellow ranked dungeon on his own.

He and an army of fifty powerful knights were sent to take down the dungeon, but what they found instead was hell. All fifty powerful knights were massacred easily by the Yellow ranked monsters, leaving General Alfeid alone in the dungeon. However, he was already far too deep inside the dungeon, so he can't simply escape.

Without a guide, he strolled down the dungeon on his own, looking for a way out. Without realizing, he found the devil's den instead.

He fought the dungeon's boss all alone and defeated it. It took him everything, even his limbs. Most importantly, he went beyond his limits, using more magic than what his magic soul is capable of. 

After he conquered the dungeon, he continued to find a way to the outside. By the time he saw the sun, it was already ten days later. He walked out of the dungeon with only one arm and one eye, and half his face was almost gone by a large claw.

Healers immediately helped him get better. After two days, his physical injuries are closed. He did lose an arm and an eye, but besides that, he was already healed.

However, what was not healed... was the unknown. His magic soul.

Back in the dungeon, it took him everything he had to stay alive. He overly used his magic so that he could survive, way beyond the capacity that he is capable of. He is surviving hell by selling his soul, which resulted in his magic soul to be heavily damaged and cracked. Only time managed to keep him stable, but even time itself cannot hold on forever.

The very next day, when everyone thought he was already healthy, he died after having thousands of strokes on his entire body.

His magic soul shattered, and every particle of magic inside his body could not find a home, and travelled to fill all of his blood vessels, filling it completely to the brim.

That same thing... seemed to have happened to me.

I overused my magic back at the orc dungeon. I was already extremely tired after fighting the three hundred red orcs, but then I entered the dungeon right after. I even fought against Galar, which should be damaging me heavily.

However... there was something else.

Compared to Alfeid's experience, what I have gone through was nothing. There must be something else that hurt me badly. I also have much larger magic points than anyone, hence it shouldn't be possible that I depleted my energy that badly.

That's right... The red eyes thing!

I don't know what kind of 'mode' or 'form' was that, but certainly my entire body felt like it had been upgraded into that of a beast. No, more powerful.

It's like a 'berserk mode'. During it, it's like my five senses sharpened. I can see Galar's movements clearer, my skin can feel the air flowing, my nose smelling anything in the air. And the biggest factor was that my mind is abnormally clear. Even in the middle of the fight, I can control my thoughts as if I'm not doing anything. 

Obviously, a powerful mode like that doesn't come freely. It's certainly the thing that has caused this.

Question is... how did I survive such sickness?

"The doctor was very surprised when he saw your magic points. And he said that you can heal your damaged magic soul if you see a healer everyday."

Hod smiled at that last part, and I can understand why. It must be what saved me as well, and I quickly understood what Hod meant with that last part.

"I can just heal myself?"

"Exactly. You have a very strong healing magic, after all."

After that, Hod began telling me about what the doctor said. The doctor said I needed a lot of healing sessions daily, at least once a day. He also told me that the doctor was very surprised when he told him I was able to do healing magic.

" 'There's nothing to be worried about, then!', was what the doctor said."

I let out a sigh of relief. But looking at Hod's face, I knew that wasn't all.

"Then..."

"What the doctor meant... was only to get you better." 

He turned his head down and folded his fingers. I realized his change of tone means something negative, and he quickly explained.

"That... doesn't mean you are permanently okay."

He finished his sentence, and I opened my eyes widely.

"What... do you mean?"

Hod lifted his right hand and conjured a glass made out of ice. I can tell that he is going to give a very good explanation, based on his knowledge as a mage.

"A person's magic soul is like a glass, a cup. You fill it with water, which is the magic energy, and you drink the water whenever you use it."

I nodded at his explanation. So far, it made sense.

"What happened to you... is quite the horrible one. Your magic soul is damaged, cracked, even. And when a magic soul is damaged, the glass cracks."

Hod touched the ice cup lightly, and small little cracks can be seen, as a few parts actually fell down to the ground. I quickly realized what he was trying to say, but I couldn't process it properly.

No... way.

"What the doctor had advised, to keep on healing yourself five hours a day, was to keep this piece of glass to stay in its place."

He picked up the fallen piece on the ground and placed it back where it belonged. However...

"However... no matter how much you have glued a broken fragment of a glass..."

He pushed the broken piece on the glass and dropped it on the floor again.

"It will never be the same."

What he held in his hand was a cracked glass made out of ice. Pretty cool illustration and explanation, but the content wasn't very cool.

"That means... I can't use magic anymore?"

I asked with such a shocked expression, and Hod looked away because he didn't want to say it directly.

"Yes... That's what it means."

Everyone else turned their head away when I finally realized the truth. I looked upwards to the ceiling, forcing myself to swallow and accept this new reality.

"Though you can still use a little bit of magic, such as your healing magic. As long as you keep on healing yourself, the damage will lessen and it will reduce the chance of you having strokes.

You can still stay alive. But in return, you can't use magic at all."

Hod's tone was quite worried. He himself was quite shocked when he heard about my situation. Everyone else seemed to be the same.

Then... what about me?

How do I feel?

When I first came to this world, I was very weak. I couldn't walk quite far without getting extremely tired. And it was because I was having less magic points than normal. A rare condition only to those that came from another world.

And what changed it?

I gained magic points, at a very high speed. Higher than normal, that surprises Jrake and Klane. And it kept on getting higher and higher, that I was able to clear a Blue ranked dungeon along with Hod and Valey.

Magic was my pride. It was my main source of power since I came to this world.

And losing the ability to use it is just...

Unfair.