Keith's POV

KEITH'S POV

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This is the third time Sam has confessed his love for me! But I can't utter a single word . If I do I'll be exposing him to danger and I'd never want that.

Keith pushed Sam back -

" stop it! Will you? It's all in your head dammit! You've been sleeping with all type of girls for so long and NOW you're telling me that YOU LOVE ME, A GUY?

What tf does that mean? need a change is that it?

you need to fix that attitude of yours Sam and until to do that STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME , FOR FUCKS SAKE DAMMIT "

And ran away from there as fast as he could with his eyes all moist.

___

" hey my baby! You did it!! you made it in the city's top school , I'm so proud of my Lil baby " My mom patted my head...

And I asked her for a brand new video game that didn't even make it to the main market yet! And guess what?

It was right in front of my eyes the same evening.

My life's been pretty much like that the entire time until one day -

" hey Keithhh , sup! "

" oh hey , Chris " I smiled at him.

"congrats my boy! "

" you too man! We made it together! "

"yeah together!! Forever! "



Chris was my best buddy since middle school.

We were pretty much stuck hip to hip with each other.

That man made me feel at ease.

Since my life was pretty much luxurious in almost every aspect. I didn't think much of it but as the time passed I or should I say my body started being conscious of his presence and there were moments when my heart felt like it would explode. The fact that made me felt anxious was that, all this things happened to me each and every time I was with Chris.

In the second year of my high school these feelings started over-flowing.

One day Chris came running to me as he held me In his embrace, he was happy and was shining .

" what happened? Why are you laughing like an idiot? " I laughed.

" you remember this one person I like for a long time now " I hummed " I confessed to them and guess what? " I raised my eyebrows " what? " .

Chris's face lit up as he said

" they accepted!!! I'm so happy! ".

" are you for real? "

"yeah man!"

"congratulations, buddy! "

" thanks man! I have to go now she's waiting for me, we planned to walk home together " he smiled and left.

As soon as he left and I finally had a moment to myself. I felt something shattering inside me. This anxious fellings j was unfamiliar with... My heart was throbbing, I was happy to see him smile but when I get to know that there's someone else who made his face lit up like that! I felt - I FELT LIKE CRYING!?

"WHAT IS THIS FEELING!? "

" the feeling of loosing something precious ! This feeling I'm having right now. What is it? Jealousy? Rage?

My legs gave up and I tripped over , clenching my heart and the tears.. THEY WON'T STOP DAMMIT -

I - I want HIM.

I WANT CHRIS!! I cried my eyes out until there was no moisture left in them.

___

After that day... I stopped going to school almost for 10 days now. I didn't reply to any text or attend any calls.

I have always received things I wanted before I could even I ask for it.

This feeling of losing something and yearning for it was totally new for me and I felt nothing but helplessness.

" I'm a man dammit why am I like this?

There's something wrong with me... Why why would I want to hold another man "

My whole body was shivering and I felt disgusted by it. This feeling!!

What is it

" I'm scared " I cried and cried.

" mom.. Dad! Help me " my voice was trembling as I speak but there was no one to reply to my cry of help.

___

My mom and dad arrived at home the next day from their business trips.

They were devastated by my appearance. I lost several pounds in those 10-12 days. My eyes had sunk inside, my face and body was all bones like of a skeleton.

My mom cried as she held me In her arms.. My father ran into the kitchen and brought me some water as I cried my eyes out in front of them.

He called his secretary to bring something healthy for me to eat.

My mother made me sat of the couch. My father sat across from us.

" what happened to my precious child?"

She sobbed ." calm down Mrs. Norman " my father asked her to stop. He moved his eyes to me and asked " what in the world happened to you ? To make you like this? A bully? " he questioned.

I shook my head and muttered something In a small voice " I'm scared "

" Speak aloud Keith "

" I'm scared, dad " my voice was shaking .

" scared? Of what? "

My mom panicked " did someone sneak in? Was there a thief? But we have the best security system installed In our house " . My father nodded at her.

" what are you scared of? "

" m-my.. Myself! "

Their faces were dumbfounded.

" scared of yourself? "

" there's something wrong with me! My body is not in my control "

Both of them were couldn't make a sense out of it.

" okay? We can fix that ! How are you feeling? " their faces calm-downed a little bit thinking, maybe I had some medical issues .

" my heart suddenly starts beating so fast and my breath felt Heavier .

I feel so anxious at times... And I feel like there's something inside of me that is yearning for something so badly that I don't understand what I'm feeling?

And the worst thing is - all this happens whenever I'm around Chris. "

Their eyes widened , my dad stood up as If he knew what was coming his way.

" were going to a psychiatrist Keith "

I looked at him and asked him if im going crazy because I wanted to be embraced by Chris, A Man!!

" am I weird dad? "

" it's all in your head , Keith ! Why would a man want to be embraced by another man! " he replied.

" but I feel like dying whenever I see him with someone that isn't me "

He slapped my face with this disgusted look on his face , " shut up Keith norman! Keep one thing in mind YOU ARE A MAN and I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU CRY OVER ANOTHER MAN! you got that! "

He was glaring at me , And I felt maybe something IS wrong with me to make my loving father so mad at me. I was shocked and scared . It was the first time my father has ever hit me .

___

After getting me a personal psychiatrist with weekly appointments . I was forced to drop out of the school , After that I never saw Chris and his family ever Again. Few months later I somehow came across a strange news that Chris family business was ruined to dust with no clue about who did it or what actually happened ! Apparently it was my own family or my father to be precise who ruined his close friends business and accused Chris of seducing and making his son ( me ) mentally sick and crazy.

" what did you do dad? Why would you? " I cried . " Go back to your room Keith " he glared at me with those unfamiliar eyes.

What happened to my loving father ?

" why did you blame Chris of all people? YOU RUINED HIS LIFE, DAD " I shouted . pleading and begged for the life of the person I loved .

My father rushed towards me. He held my shoulder. Shook me back and forth, his voice was shaking , it was my first time seeing him all broken and helpless. He shouted at me " I ruined his life? HE MADE MY SON ILL! HE RUINED YOUR LIFE, KEITH " He collapsed right in front of my eyes. I saw everyone rushing towards us to wake up my dad, carrying him back to his room. While I stood there in daze. Lost in thoughts " if only I was normal! " .

_____

My father fell ill after that incident . Watching my world shatter into peices right in front of my eyes , I cried and cried until I couldn't anymore.

" I'm done with everything! I don't wanna see my dad going through this anymore "

I made a decision at that time, I stood up from the ground. Ran towards the rooftop as fast as I could.

Standing on the fence I shouted -

" sorry mom sorry dad for not being a NORMAL kid " I jumped off the roof .

TO BE CONTINUED ..... in Part 02 <3