A Conversation with my Husband

Chapter One Hundred Forty-Six:

"Yes, I still love you but then, you never told me that you're the one who killed Siara."

Shock was reflected on Haimon's face after I said the information given to me by Wafi.

"Ho-how…"

"Can't you continue?" I asked after he released my shoulders. "It doesn't matter who I got that information from because the--"

"Yes, I killed her with my own hands." I was surprised by his sudden confession. "But it doesn't mean that I don't love her because I truly love her just because there are events from the past that we can't avoid even if we want to avoid. It's hard to understand what I said right now but by the time you remember everything from the past, you will also understand the things I did. Why of all the women here in the Celeste Country, who are better known and wealthy, you are the one I fall in love deeply. The only woman I will cherish and will give up my life just for you."

I can feel his pure love for so much it hurts because I still couldn't take off the woman named 'Siara' out of my mind. I can't forget the woman he first loved and I know there's still a part of him that loves that 'Siara'. Something I couldn't accept because he did hide from me the whole truth.

I accept that he is a Vampire and in the one year we have been together, he has never been able to hurt me so I know that even if he is a Vampire, he will never hurt me physically. But emotionally, he hurts me.

"I don't think we should talk about this." I answered.

"Shu," I stopped him.

"Haimon, don't you still understand me?" I said. "You hurt me when you couldn't trust me so it's not that easy to face you and let's talk like nothing happened!"

"I know and I am so sorry about what I did." He replied that made me to bite my lower lips because of the frustration I feel.

"Do you really think that it will solve our problem once you said sorry? Haimon, maybe you forgot that we already married and one of the foundations of marriage is trust and that is what you are not able to give. So, now. Please, just leave me alone." I said and turned my back at him but then he suddenly hugs me from the back.

"Sorry, I don't want to keep you a secret but I have one promise I can't break. And to tell you the truth, the reason why I kept all those secrets from you is I want to protect you. That is the promise I made and that decision made me realize I was wrong. And I hurt you so badly, and I don't know what to say right to relieve all the pain I've caused you, Shu. I really don't know. I'm so sorry. I really am."

I could feel in his tight embrace and in the words, he let go of the excessive remorse for what he had done and I could not help but let my tears flow down through my eyes. I cry and I cannot stop or hide it from him and I know he was crying too.

In silence, we stayed like that crying. And whether I admit it or not, in my excessive love for him even though I know he was able to hurt me, I still can't help but continue to love him. Despite it all, I still don't want to lose him. I don't want to divorce him. I still love him so dearly it hurts me.

…

From a far distance…

"Do you think Haimon can still fix their relationship?"

"Wafi, don't you trust their love for each other?"

"Trust… one thing he failed to give."

"And it is all because of Lady Siara." Sai answered. "You may have forgotten that he was the one who asked not to let his reincarnation know about the past and about the Vampires, Witches and Warlocks. Because she wanted her new beginning to live a normal life and she does have it but because of the sudden prophecy that Netron seen, things change. Something no one would have expected to come. That is why, I do understand Haimon. Why he chose to hide the whole truth from Shu Tokino."

Wafi takes a very deep breath before he answered. "You were right. Sadly, that's the method Kanik used to make him destroy the two."

"Indeed." Sai agreed. "If we only knew right away what Kanik was planning maybe we would have been able to tell Haimon."

"But we aren't. Beside I was the one who lead him to find the artifact he was looking."

"That was your duty, to regain his trust you need to do drastic measure even if it will danger them."

…

Merwa Mountain (Somewhere…)

In silence, I look at Haimon. After we cried for a long time, holding hands we went here under the tree as we sat on the protruding root of the tree and we were just silent there while still holding our hands.

The warmth given by his hand was enough proof that he was very different from what Kanik said. Cold and unfeeling Vampire, Haimon is not like that because I can feel his warmth and his true love for me. I am so sure of that.

"… so sure." I suddenly said it out loud.

"What 'so sure' do you mean?" Haimon curiously asked me.

I smiled. "The warmth of your hand… different from what Kanik told me." I honestly tell him the truth as I quickly avoided his gaze and look forward.

"Because I have a soul." I look back at him with questions. "The Vampire races have two clans. One is the Edelweiss Clan and the other is the Manu Clan. Two clans who are both Vampire but with different personalities, one with a soul and one without a soul," he explained.

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