Roisin : We're not the same

"Did you see that, girls? The latest Hermès model. A real beauty, isn't it?"

Briar, with a triumphant smile, clears the cafeteria table to make room for her new Hermès bag.

Doeve nods, her eyes gleaming with admiration.

"Oh, it's gorgeous! I just bought this Cartier watch, by the way. It's a collector's item."

It's in these moments that I wish I were thousands of kilometers away from the cafeteria.

Even though I'm in their section, have the same teachers as them, get the best grades, and am the class representative, Willowbrook constantly reminds me why I'll never be one of them.

My uniform is simple: I have no luxury items or branded bags, and I always feel out of place.

Briar notices my silence and turns to me with a condescending smile.

"And you, Roisin, when are you going to treat yourself to something truly chic? Fake diamonds on tights don't really count as 'chic.' A good bag makes all the difference, you know.".

Doeve chimes in innocently and adds:

" Yes, you should try it. It changes everything, really."

I feel my cheeks heat up. Briar always takes pleasure in pointing out these details that prove I'm different. I'll never truly be a purple , no matter how hard I try. It will always be the same, the same story over and over again.

"You know, I think feeling good in what you wear matters most, not the brand.".

The other two exchange a perplexed look.

" Of course," says Doeve," but there's nothing wrong with wanting a bit of luxury from time to time."

I grip my fork, looking away. To my right, I notice a Rolex on Kael's wrist. He eats without paying attention to the conversation. As usual.

" I'll ask my parents, but I can't promise anything. They're quite… simple."

This lie sounds false to my ears, and I see that Briar isn't fooled. It's like "scholarship student" is written on my forehead and only she can read it.

"Yes, we noticed that."

A silence falls at the table, but it's not as heavy. The conversations continue, but a new dynamic seems to be settling in.

"So, have you submitted your report for the persuasion class?" I ask, changing the subject.

" We all know you'll get the best appreciation, Roisin, your work is by far the best," says Doeve, playing with her peas.

" Thanks for your staging, I would have had a hard time succeeding without you."

A tray clattering startles us.

"Succeed in what?"

Elowen sits at our table, with two people, one of whom I recognize all too well.

Briar frowns upon seeing her new company.

" Meet Nissa and Caspian, almost the full altruist squad along other colors, I'm practically crying,"

Nissa sits next to me with a smile.

"Hey, Roisin!"

"Hey.."

Doeve seems very embarrassed while Briar's eyes are throwing daggers.

"What's gotten into you? Are you kidding?"

"Oh, please, a little charity doesn't hurt, you should try it sometime. You hang out with Roisin and I say nothing, right?"

Nissa introduces me to the new guy, then explains that Rhys had to go to the gym.

She talks to me as if I were her friend, and at that moment, I feel a lump in my stomach. Something that never happens to me.

Usually, I don't care about having to justify myself, but today, I feel some remorse. I push these thoughts away and get back into character.

Briar softens her gaze, lets go of her fork, then pretends nothing happened while touching her new bag.

"Look at my baby"

Elowen takes out her gloss, inspecting her reflection in her pocket mirror.

" If you touch your bag after touching that fork, probably infected with all the world's germs, it's no longer called Hermès but herpes."

Doeve giggles, trying to stifle her laugh, while Kael glares at Elowen, throwing his cutlery on his tray.

" Kael, you wear that horrible cap every day, it's not the cafeteria dishes that should worry you. Do you at least shower? You know, with water."

"Shut up." he says, leaving the table.

Nissa gives me a worried look.

"Is it always like this?"

" A bit, yes… Sorry."

Doeve turns to Caspian, who is typing on his phone.

"What are you doing?"

"Asking my mom to show me my cat. She's been telling me for weeks that he's fine at home, but she doesn't send me a photo."

Briar laughs nastily, wiping her hands with a wet wipe.

"Cat's toast. Next."

"You're always so nasty, Briar. Being the WBTIMES editor doesn't give you the right to say such things," says Nissa calmly.

"Oh, don't push it, Heaven. Girls like you don't get a say."

"Heaven?"

Nissa turns red and grabs her tray, ready to leave the table, but I hold her arm, signaling her to sit.

I would give anything not to be alone with those three again, and I know this opportunity might not come very soon.

"Since we're all here, shouldn't we try to get along?" I say, looking at my classmates.

Elowen takes out a full set of silverware from her bag and puts it in the center of the table.

" Exactly, she says, help yourselves. My father gave me this collection when he was in Paris last week."

Doeve still avoids looking at Nissa, and I see that both seem anxious. I wonder what got them like this.

I pick up my fork and try to lighten the mood.

" The museum trip is still on?"

" When is it again? "asks Briar, though I know she knows the date.

" October 3rd, two days after the first match of the year."

" I don't think I can come," says Elowen." The security in that place is lacking. I heard that two rather rare paintings have already been stolen in the past three months!"

Doeve looks horrified, and I seek help from the other end of the table, but Nissa doesn't seem so convinced, and Caspian is focused on his crème brûlée.

" It's not their fault. Plus, they're increasing the guards and rounds lately."

" How do you know?" she asks, cutting her meat. "My father told me recently, and it's very private information because the museum is afraid of losing customers."

I clear my throat before gulping down my drink.

" I go there often, you know. I talked to the staff."

"It's okay, we'll come, Caspian and I. Don't worry," says Nissa with a smile. "If that's okay with you?"

" Of course! You can bring whoever you want, Nissa. I'd really appreciate it."

Briar coughs, as if to bring us back to reality, then launches into yet another description of her branded bag's qualities. After a few minutes, she pretends to be sad and sick, and I know she's ready to ask for a favor.

" Roisin, my friend, the championship is starting soon and the paper won't let me off the hook about who will take the photos for the games this season."

"What are you getting at?"

" You know my fingers are too delicate for such a menial task. Plus, I think I'm coming down with a virus!"

I roll my eyes, slinging my bag over my shoulder.

" I have my art classes, I can't be there anyway."

Briar recovers as if, suddenly, she's in perfect health again.

" Nissa, right? Don't you want to help the good cause of the school paper? If you want, you'll get paid per photo."

"I'm not allowed at the sports complex. I read the rules, the blues aren't allowed to participate or be present."

Elowen finishes her glass of water in one gulp and places it loudly on the table, making me jump.

"Why not try to lift the sanction?"

Caspian almost chokes on his dessert and turns to Elowen.

" But we're fine with that !"

Elowen gives a skeptical glance at Nissa, then at Caspian, before saying.

" At least make an effort to attend, it would be such a shame to miss such a spectacle."

Nissa stands up, tray in hand, followed by Caspian who looks sick.

" We'll see."