Demise of Grandpa and my accident

"You two go to the village and observe my father. If the matter is serious then inform me. This morning I had received a phone call that his health is not good." Pa said. We were having breakfast together. As it was the order from Pa, it was a must for us to go to the village. Furthermore, the matter could be serious and I was willingly wanting to go there as it was many months I haven't smelt my Grand Parents.

After having breakfast, I along with Mamma got prepared and took a taxi. We reached the new buspark in about half an hour. From there, We took a bus to Nuwakot and started our journey towards the village. It took about 6 hours for the bus to reach there. During the whole journey, I was thinking about the health of my Grand Pa and at the same time was being worried about Suravi. And time to time, I was trying to get in contact with her dialing her number. But sometime the call was not being received whereas sometime the number was out of reach.

As we reached there, I saw that Grand Pa was kept near the Math of Tulsi. All of the villagers were gathered there. My Uncle and Aunt were already there. The condition of my Grand Pa was very worse. After a couple of hours, Pa arrived along with his friend. He was already informed about the seriousness of the matter. Soon, the discussion was started. "What to do? Either to take Granda to the hospital or wait for his condition to be a bit better."

But the Grand Pa left us the very moment. At the moment my uncle was trying to serve him Gangajal with spoon and others were chanting the names of god. Immediately, the dead body of Grand Pa was prepared for funeral. All the religious work that should be carried out at the spot of death was completed. His dead body was worshiped and covered with white and yellow clothes. Then after everybody presented there worshiped him with red dust powder and offered him garland. After that his dead body was kept in the straightchair made up of bamboo and troops of uncle carried that chair on the shoulder turn after turn. In our culture, only men were allowed for the funeral. But there was a huge crowd of the attendants. Perhaps, it was due to his deeds and service.

It took nearly about 2 hours for us to reach to the Tadi river where actual funeral was to be performed. During the journey I was observing his dead body resting peacefully on that straightchair. I was feeling as if he was trying to say me something. He might be trying to say,"Look my Grandson, Now I am tired. I can't now. It is your turn. You have to keep the pride of our longer nose. Always, remember one thing, never and ever try to do any such thing which will deduct our glory of longer nose.

But, my fate I reduced the glory of our longer nose and made it flatter, yes very flat being madly in love with the other girls. These days I feel if I ever get married my offsprings will born with flatter nose and will scold me."

The straightchair of bamboo was taken upto the Tadi river by carrying on the shoulder turn after turn. The attendants were huge in number. He had maintained a perfect image as a renowned Astrologer and a Pandit. He didn't use to care about anything whenever anyone used to call him during need. Either it was rainy day, or it was the midnight of new moon he used to go and provide service to the needy at any cost.

Someday my Grandmother had said to me,"Do you know ? Your grandfather was really a genious. Many of those sick used to be perfectly fine just by his touch. He had the knowledge of Aayurveda. He used to prepare herbal medicine and used to treat the ill." It might be hence there was a longer line of attendants in the funeral. I could observe the grief in their eyes. They all were in the pain to lose their guardain. Everyone was feeling bad in the tragic moment.

My Uncle gave him the last fire. Along with the fire, the body of Grand Pa turned into ashes soon. As the fire turned into ash a copper pot was filled with it and was taken to the river nearby where it was dissolved. Then we returned to the house.

All other rituals was performed as it was to be performed. After the ritual was over, my uncle and Pa started to discuss about Grand mother. Both of them were insisting her to stay with either of them.

There was a long discussion. But finally grandmother said,"Both of you please keep quite. I will stay with the younger one." After she expressed her desire to stay with us it was our duty to take care of her. Moreover, a house is incomplete without a guardain. Hence it was decided to keep her in our house along with her.

We boarded the bus from Chokatey and returned to our hometown along with the grandmother.

During the journey Pa, Mamma and grandmother refused to eat anything outside. But, I use to feel more hungry during long tour hence when the bus stopped at Ranipauwa I took my lunch. After having lunch, I came out from the hotel. I was thinking to board the bus which was waiting for the passengers to finish the lunch. My cell phone was still in my hand. I was trying to get in contact with Suravi.

That time as I dialed her number, it got connected but she didn't pick up the call. I stood up beside the road. I was holding my mobile and was continuously dialing her number. But although the phone was ringing, she didn't receive my call. All of a sudden, I felt as if something hit me hard aside. My whole body at once fell down on the earth. Then what happened, I couldn't remember. My eyes opened in the general ward of Teaching hospital.

As my eyes opened, I came to know that I came to full consiousness after about thirty hours. Then only I realized that being blind in the love of Suravi, my eyes could not notice the bus passing from the opposite side. Perhaps, I was not only blind that moment, I was completely deaf too.

Yes, I was deaf too by dissolving in her love alike those drunkards who lose senses in the trip of alcohol. Otherwise, I could have listened to the sharp sound of my Mamma which always used to hit my eardrum day and night. That preety sound which is always filled with pure love and innocence. My Mamma never scold me. Perhaps, it is not ever necessary. And maybe if she ever scold me that sound would also be lovely.

I just want to say that she had tried to save me from that accident. But, I was completely deaf being mad in the love of Suravi. She had hijacked my all of the five senses. Moreover, she had already flew her flag of victory over me. The colourless flag. Colourless in the sense that I don't know how does the flag of love looks like.

I turned towards my Mamma and watched her face. She was looking towards my face in deep sorrow. As soon as she noticed that I opened my eyes she started to show her anger. She shouted,"Should not you be careful while walking on the road? Where were you focusing your eyes? And where was your ear? Because of you, it becomes very hard for us. We love you so much. How much pain can you give to us? At least you must have listened to me as I gave you a call." "Please shut up your mouth. You stupid woman. Do not you see that he has just gained his consiousness. You are trying to give him unnecessary stress.You keep quite." Pa scolded her.

"Oh, it is fine then. I am the one who gives tension. You father and son have always provided me joy, haven't you? It is you who have given him much more freedom and today he is trying to be much more stupid." Angrily, Mamma was scolding Pa, moreover as if she will hit him hard the moment. I was smiling gently lying in the bed.

All of a sudden, my two elder sisters arrived there. Manika said in lovely voice. "Oh, Ratis! How are you feeling? " I looked at her face and said,"I am alright Manika." Bhuwaneswori started to convince me. She said,"You must have been a bit careful. You are our only brother. What would happen if we had to face something worst. You should have been a bit careful. We love you very much." "Okay sister, I will be careful from next time."I said to her and nodded my head. "Do not move your head. Take rest."She said and arranged my pillow.

I turned towards my mamma. She was staring at me with a faded face. I said to her, "Mamma, this hospital looks bad. Please talk to the Physician and get ready for discharge. We will do further treatement in our own house. If needed, we will go to Neuro hospital. That hospital is better." "Do not talk more. Let the physician arrive. I will talk to him." Mamma said trying to convince me.

Mamma kept quite. Manika was staring me. Being emotional she said to me,"Oh, Ratis, I have brought some sweets for you. Take it, and tell me how it is. I have prepared it myself." My small sister opened the tiffin box and handed it to me. I finished eating those sweets. I turned towards her and said,"It is far good. Not only good, it is best." She gave a gentle smile looking towards me.

Doctors along with Physician arrived. They observed other admitted patients and came up to my bed. Physician observed all of my medical reports. He talked to nurses about the medicines and my improvement. Then he asked me few questions. I told him that I had not any difficulties. Then he granted me permission to get discharge in a condition that I should follow him as outdoor patient within a week.

After completing the formalities left at hospital we took a taxi. We reached our house during the dusk. After having our dinner I entered my bedroom and soon fell asleep.

There was a gentle brightness everywhere. The energetic sunlight had made everyone enlightened and energetic. All of a sudden, smog and fog flew along with the air and covered everything present there beyond my imagination. The air was too cold as if it would freeze my blood. Such a bright day was gradually becoming too dark as if it was the night of new moon. Far aside, a glowing face was losing its glow and disappearing slowly and slowly. That face was of Suravi. The faded face full of pain and and sorrow was waving her hand facing towards me. I felt as if she was trying to say,"Good bye, Ratis. I am leaving."

I started to run. I was running as fast as I could. I had to stop her. But all of a sudden, she got dissappeared inside that fog. Yes she turned completely invisible. I couldn't feel even her shadow. There was nothing. My heart was beating too fast as if it would split into pieces. I wanted to cry. I wanted to shout and call her. I wanted to call her with her name. But my lips didn't open at the moment. My tongue also didn't gave me support. The vocal chord couldn't produce a sound. Tremendous amount of heat started to generate inside my body. I was feeling such a heat inside even if the whole water present in the Indian ocean was poured in my body, it couldn't remove that fire.

I wake up from my dreams. My pillow was wet with tears. I started to search my frogy. I searched for it below my pillow. It wasn't there. Then I searched for it inside my bookcase, table and whole room. But I couldn't find it anywhere. Where had it been I couldn't figure out. As I had named it frogy, perhaps it went to the pond. Mamma too had woke up already. As she noticed that my room was bright she entered my room. She then said,"Instead of taking rest, what are you trying to do? Should not you take care about your health? Go to the washroom and wash your face. I will make a tea for you."

That moment, neither I wanted to wash my face nor I wanted to have tea. Instead I was willingly wanting to talk to Suravi. Hence, I said to mamma,"Mamma, where is my phone?" She said,"Why do you need phone? Take my phone and make a call from it. With whom do you want to talk?" I became a bit anxious and said to her,"Please give me my phone. There is the number stored in phonebok." "Whose number?" Mamma said. "Please do not irritate me. Suravi's contact number is there in my phone. Please give it to me fast." I said to her in a loud voice. "Oh dear, please be calm. Look dear, your phone was lost during accident at the spot. We couldn't notice as we were in rush to take you to the hospital. As we were worried about you, we could not pay attention towards your phone."

I started to feel more anxious. My body started to shiver. I said to her,"What are you trying to say? Please provide me my phone if you are trying to hide it from me." Mamma then said to me with a soft voice,"Why should I hide your phone? Please believe me. I haven't hidden your phone. Do not you trust me?"

I trust my Mamma more than myself. I must trust her, shouldn't I? Of course, I should. As she is the one whom I could trust with my blindfolded eyes. Hence, I said to her,"Okay, then leave it." I wanted to recall the contact number of Suravi. But I couldn't remember. Instead, my head started to get pain. "Today, I will go to the college and meet her and clear everything in front of her." Thinking it, I said to Mamma,"Mamma, I will go to the college today."

Before Mamma could say anything Pa arrived there and said,"Are you out of your mind? Did you forget that you have arrived home just a day before? Stiches of the wound hasn't been removed yet, and you moron are saying that you want to go to the college. Wait for few days and take rest. Then you can go to the college and study.

I could not say no to his words. Hence, I waited for a week. That single week or let me say that seven days were too tough to spend for me alike seven hundred years. How panic and stressed I was during that week only I know. A fish taken out of a pool might not get suffocated that much as I was suffocated during those days. Yes I was suffering a lot just for a lady who never appreciated my love. Yes, for that girl who had never kept trust towards me.