Chapter Fifty Two – Gone Demented

Disclaimer: The Harry Potter universe belongs to JK Rowling, Scholastic, Bloomsbury, Warner Bros and some other high falutin' companies. Me, I'm just a PR professional. I don't profess to own - and would never dream of making any money off - JKR's wonderful world. However, its her sandbox and she's left the gate unlatched so we can go in and play a bit. Which, I've done.

Chapter Fifty Two – Gone Demented

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-==(oIo)==-

\""/

"You two are bonkers!" said Hermione.

"Hey, it's a harmless prank," said Harry.

"Yeah, it's not as if we're going down into the Chamber of Secrets," said Neville

"Or fight a ruddy great basilisk, or anything," said Harry.

That earned him a glare from all the girls, except Luna.

"It's just harmless fun," said Neville.

"It'll crack a few laughs," said Harry.

"And means the twins become the target of a prank, for a change," said Neville.

"Without anyone actually being hurt," said Harry.

"Oh, Merlin!" groaned Daphne. "They're doing it, again."

After first giving her head a little shake, trying to clear the confusion she was beginning to feel from the near twin-speak of the boys, Trace said, "And you want us to brew the Potion for you."

"You, Daphne and Hermione are the best brewers we've got," said Harry, getting up and walking over to one of the bookcases. "It's a pretty advanced potion to brew."

He looked through the shelving until he found a book called 'Moste Potente Potions'. "We discussed this book last year, if you remember," he said, flipping through the pages. "Ah! Here it is."

Bringing the book back to where they were all sitting he placed the book with the pages opened to the potion. "Ingredients are: lacewing flies stewed for twenty-one days, leeches, powdered bicorn horn, knotgrass, fluxweed picked at full moon, shredded boomslang skin, and a bit of who one wants to turn into usually hair."

Thinking, Daphne said, "The two difficult to obtain ingredients are going to be the fluxweed picked at a full moon and the shredded bloomslang skin; and shredded boomslang skin and powdered bicorn horn are expensive."

"We can get the fluxweed here," said Luna. "It grows down near the edge of the Forbidden Forest."

"Really?" asked Hannah. It's supposed to be quite rare. I didn't know it was available outside of a herbologist's greenhouse, these days."

"Oh, the Forbidden Forest was where the founders, and others since, used to grow potion ingredients. So, if you look around the edge of the forest, you sometimes find some," replied Luna.

"Alright," said Tracey. "We'll go take a look. If we find it, there's a full moon coming up on the 30th of September."

Hermione, who had pulled the book over to read, said, "That's a couple of weeks away, but we have to wait for the lacewings to stew for twenty-one days, anyway."

"So, we're doing this?" asked Harry to the group.

The girls looked at one another before Daphne said, "If you're so determined to do this - then, yes."

The boys looked at each other and said, "Yes!" almost in unison.

"If anything, it's quite an advanced potion and we can use it to demonstrate a skill level above our year," said Daphne. "But, you're going to have to get the ingredients we need, before we need them."

Harry rapidly nodded his head with a big grin on his face.

"As it's going to take about a month," said Hermione. "Where are we going to brew this where it won't be tampered with?"

"The etiquette club office," said Harry. "I had thought in here, but it means the door will always be visible - I think - and we don't want people just walking in and finding this place."

"So, you two have four weeks to practice talking like Fred and George Weasley and learning all you can about them," said Susan. "If you're going to temporarily steal their identities, you need to know how to be them. Otherwise, people will quickly figure out you two are the imposters."

"The more I think about this, the more fun I think we're going to have with it," said Neville.

"Oh!" he said, turning back to the girls. "We're going to need, at least, four doses of it - possibly six. So, plan on making a decent sized batch of it."

'Why six?" asked Hannah.

"We need the first pair for when we play the prank on Fred and George," replied Harry, holding off his hand and ticking them off on his fingers; "we're going to need the second pair when, with Fred and George's help, we play the prank on the school in the Great Hall; and the third is if we're stuck in the Great Hall and it looks like going over the hour, we can sip the spare to extend the time."

"Polyjuice Potion is often quite handy to have," said Tracey. "We may as well brew up a decent sized batch of it."

"Good," said Harry. "Then I just need a shopping list for Sirius to pick up what we need from Diagon Alley. Self heating cauldrons, stirrers, stewing solution, et cetera."

"I still think you two are bonkers," said Hermione, looking at Harry and Neville.

Rather than looking abashed, both boys just grinned back.

_‗_

-==(oIo)==-

\""/

The four ladies rings and one male ring arrived for the other five members of the eight a couple days later. The rings were loaded with all the auto-detection spells they could load onto them. Charms, curses and potions that were tried to slip past them through their food or mail would be, in most cases, caught.

The rings were also charmed to remain invisible at all times, unless they detected something. At that time they would appear and flash or vibrate as necessary.

Harry, Daphne and Hermione instructed them on the wearing of the rings and how they worked. And, from then on, the Eight sat together and often passed notes, offered food, made silly gestures over the food, and anything else they could think of to have their rings pass over food and drink before it was touched with any part of their physical bodies.

Luckily, none of it was coming up with anything that appeared harmful or otherwise mind altering.

Remus also had Harry and the others hold back at the end of their classes and used the opportunity to run scans on all of them. None of the scans were showing any sort of harmful potion or charm.

_‗_

-==(oIo)==-

\""/

The days were starting to march on and the Eight - or 'Harry and the Seven', as Harry and the others started to learn they were now being called by other students - were starting to get used to the added course and assignment load. The Polyjuice Potion was almost complete and the two boys had been practicing as often as possible 'twin-speak'. They were getting quite good at it.

They quickly figured out it was often best if Neville started a sentence as Harry was quite intuitive as to where the sentence should end. But, Neville did have his moments and could do it, too.

With Luna guiding the way, the girls found the fluxweed for the potion, and picked it during the full moon. Plus, they also found other botanical potion ingredients and carefully marked each for later use, if they needed it.

Sirius, as Harry knew he would, loved the idea of the prank and immediately went into the Alley and purchased the required, missing, ingredients and the equipment. And the girls set everything up in the club office.

It was Hannah who foresaw another problem, and she and Susan worked on solving it. While Neville wore Gryffindor colours, Harry did not. And the twins were also both a bit taller than the two boys. So, Hannah and Susan worked on transfiguring the robes of both boys into the right sized Gryffindor robes that would match Fred and George.

Next, they also figured out how to password the Spell Cancelling Charm, 'Finite Incantatem' to stop someone casting it and undoing the change, with their names as the passwords. (That was a spell that later became a popular addition in the Auror - and even Unspeakable - spellcraft armoury.)

Ginny Weasley also made the Gryffindor Quidditch team and, as promised, he approached her and offered her the use of the Firebolt for the Gryffindor against Slytherin game. The girl almost cried in happiness.

Harry ensured she had ample opportunity to practice on it so she wouldn't be mounting it for the first time at the match.

The Eight's contentment came crashing down when Harry was contacted late one afternoon by Sirius via mirror.

"Bad news, pup," he said.

"Oh?" asked Harry, as the others all crowded around.

With a sigh, Sirius said, "Pettigrew managed to escape from Azkaban."

Shocked, Harry asked, "How? I thought that place was supposed to be escape-proof!"

"Apparently, not," said Sirius. "Apparently, the guards relied too heavily on the belief it was escape-proof, and the dementors. About once a month the prisoners are, one at a time, removed from their cells while the guards enter and scrub it clean.

"They forgot Pettigrew is a rat animagus and, instead of putting anti-animagus cuffs on him while he was out from under the anti-animagus wards on the cell, they put normal magic inhibiting cuffs on him, instead.

"They left him in another cell just watched over by a dementor. As soon as the guards moved away, he transformed into the rat. From experience, I know the dementors leave you alone while you're in animagus form. And he scurried out through the bars and away.

"The guards only left him alone for five minutes; but, that was five minutes too long. By the time they returned, he was long gone. A search of the island turned up nothing."

"Damn it!" growled Harry. "When does the news break?"

"The Prophet already has it," replied Sirius. "However, they've agreed to hold off on reporting it until tomorrow morning's edition; rather than releasing a special edition this afternoon."

"Alright," sighed Harry. "What's being done?"

"Well, here's the second bit of bad news," replied Sirius. "The Minister is absolutely convinced Pettigrew is going to go after you. So, he's going to station dementors at Hogwarts."

"What?" exclaimed Harry. "Is the man a naffing idiot?! These children can't protect themselves from dementors!"

"No, they can't," replied Sirius. "The Minister is convinced the children are perfectly safe because the dementors are under Ministry control. However, we all know that control is rather - tenuous.

"However, Dumbledore is also already fully aware of the Minister's intent to place dementors at the school, and has used his position as Headmaster to state they won't be allowed on the grounds. Instead, they'll be set to patrolling the area immediately outside the castle wards."

"That's still too naffing close!" growled Harry.

"We know, but it's the best we can do, for now," said Sirius.

"And why the hell would the rat come after me?" asked Harry. "He was here, in the castle, for two years, already. If the rat wanted to make a try for me he'd have already done it!"

"That was our argument," replied Sirius. "However, Fudge is not a man who will listen to reason when he has his mind made up about something. He wants to be seen as doing something, rather than admit he's at a loss as to what to do."

"Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!" growled Harry. "When do they get here?"

"They're already on their way," the old dog replied. "They're being herded across the land from the island even as we speak. They'll probably be there in a couple of days."

"Herded?" asked Harry. "Just how many of the naffing things are being sent here?"

"About a hundred," replied Sirius.

"Oh, this is just getting better and better!" grouched Harry.

"Well, your Aunt Amelia has offered Dumbledore a team of aurors to protect the students, and to teach the older years how to cast the patronus using your teaching methods. Which, by the way, are now part of the mandatory curriculum for the training of all aurors coming out of the academy from now on," said Sirius. "However, Dumbledore refused. His excuse is that the dementors won't come inside the grounds of the castle because they'll have been told not to.

"Personally, I think it's because he doesn't want to create the precedent of having aurors stationed at Hogwarts. And, he's using them as a way to place further controls on the students. The students won't be able to leave the castle without being escorted by a Professor."

"Stupid old fool!" snarled Harry.

Sirius nodded and said, "So, your Aunt Amelia is asking you, through me, to offer to teach the older years how to cast the Charm. The way to get past Dumbledore's restriction is to approach Professor Flitwick and offer him to teach it in his older years' classes."

"Yeah," sighed Harry. "That I can do."

"Then, I've done my job and will leave you with it," said Sirius. "Good luck."

"Yeah, see you, Padfoot." sighed Harry. And the mirror went grey.

Turning to the others, he said, "I need to go and speak to Professor Flitwick. And, I'd best do that now."

_‗_

-==(oIo)==-

\""/

Harry and Neville were waiting in the Entrance Hall for the arrival of 'Uncle Algie' - also known as the Unspeakable, Algernon Croaker - when what looked like a Seventh Year Ravenclaw student entered and said, "Boys. It's me."

The two boys looked at each other before Neville's eyes widened. He turned back to the student and, in a shocked voice, asked, "U.A.?"

"In the flesh," the student said with a grin. "I'm glad to see that fall from the third floor did you no lasting damage when I let go of your ankle."

Neville grinned and turned back to Harry. "It's him," he said.

The student, now identified as Uncle Algie, gestured to the Hall's antechamber and said, "Let's go in here, shall we?"

Harry and Neville looked around to make sure they weren't being watched before walking into the antechamber they were in immediately prior to the Sorting. Croaker followed them in, shut the door and immediately started casting wards about the place.

When he finished, he turned back to the two boys and allowed his glamour to drop. He was wearing his Unspeakable uniform, and reached up to allow the hood to drop back onto his shoulders.

"Lord Greengrass came to see me and hand-delivered the memories of you two in the Chamber, speaking to Riddle and fighting the basilisk," he said. "I must say, you two impressed the hell out of me."

Neville blushed while Harry grinned. Neville still wasn't used to receiving praise. And praise by the Head Unspeakable was high praise, indeed.

"Because of the effort of both of you," continued Croaker, "we're that much closer to putting an end to Riddle. If what he said down there is true, we now know he aimed to create seven of those monstrosities.

"However, we believe he would have been able to only split his soul six times. You destroyed one in the diary - and using basilisk venom in the fang to do it was brilliant, by the way."

"That was Fawkes's idea, not mine," interrupted Harry.

"Irrespective of that, we now know that's a way to destroy them. And you helped us discover it," Croaker gently replied. "We also know of two - or, possibly, one now - fragments of soul that were in your scar when you arrived here, and the one inside Quirrell. Both of those 'fled' to parts unknown for now.

"That leaves four parts, with each part possibly - even, probably - housed within horcruxes. To find those, we're going back over Riddle's past to see what else he may have used, and where he may have put it."

"Well," said Harry. "The diary was in the possession of Lucius Malfoy. It's possible other horcruxes are in the possession of other Death Eaters. If I was given one of those to keep safe, I wouldn't want it where someone could come across it, accidentally, or steal it. I'd put it in my vaults."

"If the goblins discovered you did that, they'd kill you," said Croaker. "It's a breach of their laws to..." The older man suddenly stopped and appeared to be thinking hard.

"Uncle Algie?" asked Neville, concerned.

"You know," he suddenly said. "Riddle wouldn't necessarily tell his DeeEees they were horcruxes; he'd just tell them it was important they be kept safe. Based on that information alone, they might well have put such an item in their vaults."

Looking at Harry, he said, "Well done, Harry. If we all manage to survive that long, come and see me after you finish your education. I'll probably have a job for you in my Department. It's a rare wizard or witch who can think critically, like that."

"Thank you, Sir," replied Harry.

"Any other ideas you want to let me know about?" asked Croaker.

"Well," said Harry, "if I was looking to hide more of those horcruxes, I wouldn't just rely on my underlings. Once one was discovered in the possession of such a person, then it stands to reason they'd also search the possessions of the other known underlings. For example, it's led us to thinking about a horcrux in a possible vault.

"I'd be looking at hiding one or more of them, myself; probably more rather than one. But, I'd hide them in places significant to me; such as my childhood home. I mean, he made one out of his school time diary, or personal journal, or whatever it was supposed to be. Clearly, it was an item of significance to him. He might hide them in places that are such, too.

"I'd look in Gaunt Manor, if there is such a place. And, maybe where he worked after school. And in the place he was raised before coming here. Hell, there might even be one here, since he spent seven years of his life here. What do you think?"

"Yeah," said Croaker, a little amazed. "You're definitely coming to work with me when you finish your schooling. It's a good thing you're taking Arithmancy and Ancient Runes, or I'd be wanting to talk you into switching over to them. If you were magical-raised I'd insist on you taking Muggle Studies, too, if you weren't already taking it anyway.

"Those are all sound leads and go with what we've been thinking. I want you to keep on thinking about leads, too. Anything else?"

"Not on that, no," replied Harry. "However, Dumbledore is quite canny. He saw the two malevolent spirits for what they were, and he also knows of the diary. He might well be searching for them, as well."

"I want to leave the old meddler out of it, for now," mused Croaker. "He has a bad habit of sticking his nose into matters and screwing things up six ways from Sunday."

"Neville? Anything from you?" asked the older man, turning to him.

"If he was going to hide one here," mused Neville. "It may very well be in the Chamber. After all, it takes a parseltongue to get in. But, the castle's a big place. It could even be in plain sight and we wouldn't know. It's a pity we don't have something we could use to pinpoint it for us. That is, if one is here, of course.

Looking up at Harry, suddenly he said, "One could even be his Award for Special Services to the School in the Trophy Room."

"How do we know if it is?" asked Harry.

"That, you leave to me," said Croaker. "Do you still have the diary?"

"Ummm - no," said Harry. "I used it to trick Malfoy into freeing his abused house elf, Dobby."

Croaker snorted and said, "I saw the memory of that you provided to Lord Greengrass. Did Dobby give it back to you?"

"No," said Harry, a little disappointed. "I didn't think to ask him for it back."

"Call him for me," said Croaker.

Harry shrugged and said, "Alright - Dobby!"

The excitable little house elf appeared. "Did the great, wise and wonderful Harry Potter Sir call Dobby?"

Croaker snorted in amusement.

"I did, and thank you for coming, Dobby." replied Harry.

The little elf teared up and said, "The Great Harry Potter Sir thanked Dobby. Dobby is such an honoured elf."

Ignoring the remarks, Harry asked, "Do you remember what happened to the diary I hid the sock within after your ex-Master gave it to you?"

"Oh, yes, Harry Potter Sir. Dobby put it away for safekeeping," the elf replied.

"Keep the sock, of course. But, could I have the diary back, please? It's very important," asked Harry.

"Certainly, Sir," said Dobby. He popped away for a few seconds before returning with another pop. Holding it in his hand, he offered the diary to Harry, "Here you are, Sir."

Accepting it, Harry said, "Thank you very much, my friend. You may return to what you were doing."

Tearing up again, the little elf said, "The Great Harry Potter Sir considers Dobby his friend!" before he popped away.

Harry silently offered the diary to Croaker. "May I ask why you need it? After all, the soul piece within it was destroyed."

"Yes, but the magical signature and residue are not," said Croaker. "That's what we'll use to determine the others." He dropped the diary into a pocket in his robes. "Now, the Chamber."

"Yes?" asked Neville.

"I believe you said it takes parseltongue to get in?" the older man asked.

"Yes," said Harry. "In parseltongue, it's 'Open' to get into the secret entrance and 'Open' again to open the doors to the Chamber itself. To open the mouth on the statue, if that's important, it's 'Speak to me, Slytherin; greatest of the Hogwarts' four'."

Croaker drew a glowing crystal from another pocket and said, "Speak those three into this crystal. It'll record it in perfect clarity."

"Errr..." said Harry a little abashed. "I can only speak it when looking at a snake, or picture of a snake."

Croaker smiled and made a slight gesture. Suddenly, a picture of a snake appeared in his hand. He held it next to the crystal.

Harry blinked in surprise before leaning forward and speaking clearly, §Open§ - §Open§ - §Speak to me, Slytherin; greatest of the Hogwarts Four.§ before standing back up straight.

Croaker dropped the crystal back into his pocket. "And that's how we do it in the DoM, boys. Now, I believe the entrance is located in the second floor girl's bathroom? The one Myrtle usually haunts?"

"Yes," said Harry. "There's a circle of sinks just inside the door. The sink that directly faces you has an engraving of a snake on the faucet. Say 'Open' in parseltongue to that and it opens up to reveal the entrance. Be aware, though; it's a dirty, messy slide down. Fawkes brought us back up the slippery pipe afterwards."

"Thank you for the warning," said Croaker. "I think that's it, for now. Do you boys have anything else for me?"

"No," said Neville.

"Ummm - just a query, actually," said Harry.

"Yes?"

"Why don't the Ministry place tracking charms on their prisoners?" he asked. "In case of escape, I mean. Along the lines of the tracers we have to track us for underage magic."

Croaker smiled and asked, "And how would we go about that?"

"Well, I know it's illegal to place Tracking Charms on citizens, but prisoners do not have the rights of citizens. And it's only illegal to place the Charm on someone, not leave it there if it's already there.

"If I was doing it, I'd find some way to engrave it in rune form onto the bone of their skull - as that bone grows the least in the human body - so the Charm can't be 'Finite Incantatem'ed. At least, that way, there won't ever be another at-large escapee like Pettigrew.

"I'd also not tell them I was doing it, either. You Unspeakables like to keep secrets, so it's something you can do and not tell anyone you did it."

Croaker grinned back and said, "Well, you've thought it through, this far. How do you propose to secretly engrave it on their skull?"

"Alright. You've now got all these Lords and other purebloods recently arrested," replied Harry. "Tell the prisoners 'someone with political power' wants to see them all receive a proper health check. Do it during the health check. A little Numbing Charm or Potion for the area, and it can be done.

"That way, if there are any more escapes, you can track them down. It should be a doddle then.

"And, if they are lawfully released at a later date, you still have a way to track them in case they reoffend."

Croaker chuckled, shook his head a little slowly, and said, "You - are definitely coming to work for me."

Turning to Neville, he said, "Not a word about this to anyone, Neville. I don't want to have to Memory Charm you."

A little fearful, Neville said, "Not a word, Uncle Algie. I promise."

Croaker nodded and, with a grin, asked, "Anything else; oh, font of ideas?"

Harry grinned and replied, "Not right now, no. But I'll keep you in mind, if I do."

Croaker laughed and said, "See that you do."

_‗_

-==(oIo)==-

\""/

"So, there you have it, Professors," said Harry, talking to both Professors Flitwick and McGonagall in Professor Flitwick's office. "The Head of the DMLE has tasked me with asking you if you wouldn't mind allowing me to teach your older years how to cast the Patronus Charm."

"It's a very good idea," said Professor Flitwick before turning to Professor McGonagall. "Minerva?"

"Do it. And we won't be telling Alb... the Headmaster you're doing it, either," she said to Harry, before turning to the Charms Master. "Let Mister Potter know when the classes are on and I'll let the Professors know for the classes he misses that he's otherwise busy on a special project for the pair of us."

"Are you sure you can do this, Mister Potter?" asked Professor Flitwick. "It's quite an advanced charm and most adults can't do it."

Harry nodded and said, "Over summer, and in secret, at the request of Madam Bones, I taught a class of two dozen aurors who were, until then, unable to cast the charm after many months of attempts. By the end of a couple of hours I had all but two of them casting fully corporeal patronuses."

Both Professors looked back at him in shock. The first to recover, Professor McGonagall asked, "How?"

"As I explained to that class, the instruction of what sort of memory to use is wrong," explained Harry. "You're told you need to use a happy memory. While that is inherently true, it needs to be more than that. Think of your own happy memories. You'll see the memory also has a strong element of love involved with it.

"When I tried to teach this charm to Herm... Miss Granger, she tried to use the happy memory of her being handed her first report card with top marks across all subjects. However, that memory failed because, while she thought it may have been the happiest moment of her life, there was no love in it.

"So, we found a new one for her. It was a memory of her father cuddling her in his arms and telling her how proud he was of her. It was her father's love, and her returned love, that made the memory powerful enough. The feeling of love is the memory required, not happiness."

Both Professors thought about that for a few moments before Professor Flitwick said, "You know, that makes complete and perfect sense. Love has a magic all its own. And, my own memory includes the element of love."

"As does mine," said Professor McGonagall. "And it is love, rather than happiness, that is anathema to dementors and lethifolds."

Turning back to Harry Professor Flitwick said, "Alright, Mister Potter. You're about to become a temporary Professor of Charms at Hogwarts. Your first class is 9.00am on Monday morning."

"Thank you, Professor," replied Harry before turning to Professor McGonagall. "And that means I'll be missing your class first, Professor McGonagall."

Nodding, she smirked and said, "In that case, I shall let myself know you won't be attending."

_‗_

-==(oIo)==-

\""/

That evening, Dumbledore stood to make his announcement. "Our school, starting from some time over the next few days, will be playing host to some of the dementors of Azkaban; who will be here on Ministry of Magic business."

Except for Harry and the Seven, the Headmaster, and Professors Flitwick and McGonagall, no one was aware, at that time, as to the escape of Pettigrew from Azkaban.

"They will be stationed at every entrance to the grounds, and patrolling just outside the wards," he continued. "And while they are with us, I must make it plain that nobody is to leave school without permission. Dementors are not to be fooled by tricks or disguises - or even invisibility cloaks," he added blandly, and the Eight all glanced at one another. "It is not in the nature of a dementor to understand pleading or excuses. I, therefore, warn each and every one of you to give them no reason to harm you. I look to the prefects, and our Head Boy and Girl, to make sure no student runs afoul of the creatures. That is all."

Surprising the Ravenclaws, who had all completed their punishment for their treatment of Luna, the Eight were sitting at the Ravenclaw table. Harry's argument for doing it was that he needed the 'Claws to now understand that he was once more recognising them as fellow students.

_‗_

-==(oIo)==-

\""/