chapter 13

"Justice for Zack!" Everyone starts to gather around him.

"We need to go," Mr. Langford says, taking a step.

"Wait." I pull my hands from his grip. "Make them stop," I tell him.

It's wrong for them to treat him this way when it hasn't been proven that he killed Zack. As far as the law goes, he's innocent, and he shouldn't be treated this way.

"Enough!" Someone's voice squeals over a microphone. I look over and see Alisyn standing beside Jeremy with a microphone in her right hand. "You all want justice for Zack?!" She shakes her head. 

"That's absurd! You all envied him!" she yells with agony, and then she smiles mischievously. "Based on what the police are saying, Everyone present at his party is a suspect. So instead of protesting against one person, protest against yourselves, because the killer can also be one of you." Alisyn casts fear upon everyone as they murmur, looking at each other skeptically.

"We better start going," Mr. Langford says and walks towards his car. When I look upwards I see them putting Zack's coffin in the hearse.

"Come on…" Mom says, walking away with Charity beside her, and I reluctantly follow them.

We get into Mr. Langford's car and he drives behind the hearse and many other cars following behind us. Seeing the way Alisyn defended Jeremy, she must really like him, but I'm not sure Jeremy feels that way about her, despite her sticking by his side at all times. In a few minutes, we arrived at the cemetery. They place Zack's coffin beside his dogged grave, on top of a burial chamber. And we all gather around it with the pastor in our midst —next to Zack's coffin. His Bible in his hands, and his head down, shedding tears. I haven't been to many funerals but I think it isn't common to see a pastor cry while laying someone to rest. He does it quite often, he should be used to it. I and Charity share a confused gaze. 

"Zack Freeman was our beloved brother, son, and friend. His life on earth was cut short, but the memories of him will remain forever in our hearts…" he continues his sermons, and I get a glimpse of Jeremy among the people standing opposite me. What's he doing here? He wasn't even that close to Zack. He stares at me neutrally for a few seconds, and I can't read him.

"What's he doing here?" Charity whispers to me.

"I have no idea," I whisper back, staring at him.

After the sermon, the pastor prays for both Zack and everyone present, then declares for them to lower Zack's Coffin into the grave. And I stand still, watching Zack leaving me for eternity. The truth is, I feel nothing, no pain, no joy, no nothing. I just stand still like a molded sculpture. After he is six feet down, they begin to pour dirt on him. His mom first, then four Young boys carry on. While they cover Zack with dirt, people start dropping flowers next to his grave as they leave. Mom and Mr. Langford do too. 

"You coming," Mom startles me.

"Uhmm," I breathe out. "I was hoping…" 

"Yes —" she cuts me off. "You can say goodbye for as long as you want," she says, and I nod. She hugs me before leaving with Charity and Mr. Langford. 

Little by little, I am left alone amid thousands of lifeless souls. Well, I thought I was alone until, "It's okay to miss him," Jeremy says beside me. I look at him, unfazed, tired.

"He kept a lot of things from me, I don't know if I should be mad at him or pity him," I say, looking at Zack's grave.

"He's dead, it no longer matters."

"What?" I don't get it.

"It only hurts if you are alive. The dead feel nothing."

"So you are saying, he can't feel my anger towards him?"

"I'm saying it only matters when you are angry at the living. Forgive the living and forget the deeds of the dead."

"Does that mean I should forgive you?" I turn to face him.

"I would love that, but I can't bet on it," he says.

If he hadn't killed anyone, if he wasn't taken away, and if he hadn't spent more time with Mikaela, my life would have been filled with so much joy. It makes me wonder why my happiness is tied to him.

"I am quite forgiving you see."

"Hmmmmm…" he hums, tilting his head left and right.

"I am!" I hit him on the chest. He laughs, and my heart sinks to my stomach. I have never seen him laugh for five years and it seems like ages. I silently stare at him. I'll be deceiving myself If I say I don't miss him. We were like Hermione and Harry Potter. He had always cared for me and made sure of my safety. And of course, it is natural for me to be jealous seeing my best friend having another best friend. I didn't mean to hate Mikaela, I was just angry that she kept taking things that belonged to me.

"You okay?" He snaps at my face, and I instantly turn my face away, feeling shy.

"It's hard to trust you, after seeing what you did, it's —"

"I don't want you to trust me," he cuts me off, and I look into his eyes trying to understand what he means. "How can you when I don't even trust myself? I've done terrible things, Anna, but for the right reasons. You might not understand it now, you might never understand it, but you need to know that I can never do anything to hurt you even though I want to too many times, I just can't bring myself to it."

Is it right for me to believe him? Is it okay to be standing this close to him and listening to what he's saying? God, I want to give him a big hug. I want to cry on his shoulder and tell him how badly I miss him. I want to say I'm sorry for putting him in juvie. I wish things hadn't gone south between us.

I didn't realize I was crying until it fell to my cheek. "Then I guess we can never be the way we used to be," I say, and he brings his head down.

"Jeremy!" Someone screams out our sentimental moment from us. 

I and Jeremy immediately look over the road and see Alisyn waving from across. Matthew comes out from Alisyn's car and the both of them stride toward us.

Why are they here? Jeremy looks at me like he can hear my thoughts, and it feels like I can hear his too.

"What are you two doing here?" Alisyn asks Jeremy the moment she reaches where we are.

"We were—"

"Is everything okay?" Jeremy cuts me off, probably because he knows I was about to sass at Alisyn.

"Umm…" 

Matthew waves at me, and I wave back. "I'm glad you're okay." I let him know that I'm no longer mad at him.

"I overheard Detective Chrome telling my dad that we'll be tried," Alisyn says,and startles me.

"Wait what?" Jeremy let out.

"But…when?" I am utterly confused.

"In two weeks," Alisyn says.

"She said if we are unable to give the judge a good reason why we were at his house, then…" she pauses and her eyes go sullen.

"Then what?" I ask.

"We'll be considered guilty, and be arrested," Matthew says.

My heart starts to pound. But…but…I didn't kill Zack, I just…he called me, and the only evidence I have to prove that is gone because of Mr Langford. People like him should be kept in the Zoo, they are worse than wild animals.

"Can they do that?" I ask.

"No," Jeremy replies. "Someone is obviously doing this to us. We are being framed," Jeremy says.

Pum pummmmm!!!. Another heart-drenching distraction. We all look over the road upon hearing the atrocious horning sound.

"Wait…isn't that Delilah?" Alisyn sounds excited to see her.

She smiles standing beside her brand-new car. Sunglasses on, a blue trouser suit, and a three-inch blue heel, and let's not forget the blue Versace bag that's hanging at the crook of her elbow. She sashays towards us. I'll admit, I'm impressed with the way she walks so fluently in those heels.

"More like the lier," Jeremy says.

"I have always loved her sense of fashion," Alisyn praises.

"Oh sorry, I didn't know wearing blue to a funeral is considered fashion." I shoot at Alisyn.

"Like you know anything about fashion," she shoots back at me.

"Wow!" Delilah lets out, standing five feet from us. "As much as I love to see the four of you together, I also hate it," she says, and we look at each other trying to find out if one of us understands what that means.

"I love the handbag, Delilah," Alisyn tells her.

"Thank you. It's Versace, the latest," she vaunts. 

"Wow," Alisyn utters, and I scoff.

"What boo? Gat something on your throat?"

"Okay, it's time for us to go," Jeremy takes his mom by the hand.

"I'll see you guys later," he says, looking at me, and I bring my eyes down. He walks his mom to the car and they drive off. 

I go to Kreamy and spend the rest of the day chugging strawberry ice cream and trying not to think about Zack or the fact that I'll soon be convicted for a crime I did not commit. Charity tells me to go home at exactly 8 pm, so I don't upset her father, and I obey. I troll home, arriving at 8:25 pm. The moment I open the door, I see my parents having tea with a strange lady who happens to be wearing a black suit, and spectacle. They all look surprised to see me. What? I thought they were expecting me to come home.

"Baby," Mom stands up, still in her sackcloth. I step further into the house. 

"I'm sorry for not coming home immediately?" I apologize to Mr. Langford through Mom.

"It's fine," Mom rubs her palm on my shoulder.

"You must be Arianna," the brunette lady says as she stands up.

"I'm Prishka Singh, your attorney." She offers a handshake.

My eyes bulge. "My what?" I ask, and she looks at both Mr. Langford and my mom with an equal shock on her face.

"Uhmm…" she closes her hands.

"Baby, the police set up a trial for the four of you, so we thought —"

"She's your attorney, and you are going to tell her everything that happened that night —" Mr. Langford cuts Mom off with his authorized voice as the man of the house.

"Everything?" I ask him with my brows raised. "Even the text I got from him?" My question is successful at igniting that fear he tries not to show. He stands up at once, staring into my eyes.

"Text? What text?" My so-called Attorney asks, seeming interested. I must say, she's already doing her job for being this curious.

"It's a long story," Mr. Langford tells a common lie.

"How about I make it brief?" I turn my face to Prishka Singh. "The night Zack passed, he gave me 20 missed calls and three text messages. It sounded urgent. He said it was urgent and he needed me. I've never seen him so in need of someone…" All of a sudden I begin to feel guilt. I know his text and calls has something to do with his death, if only I had received them earlier 

"Are you telling me that Zack called you before he passed?" It turns out that my attorney has a pinch of an Indian accent.

She lets out a breath, then she gulps. "How many people know about this?" She asks me. I sense her fears, I thought she's an attorney, they handle cases way worse than this.

"Uhmm…Mr. Langford is the only person I told, why?" I ask Curiously.

"Because it would have made you look bad, almost like his killer. You received such disturbing text from him, you went to his house and he ended up dead. Even so, the judges might think you know something about his death, that would be the only reason he called you out of every other person." It is beginning to sound tense and serious. Was that the reason Mr. Langford deleted the text messages, to protect me?

"It might also be because we were Best friends," I point out.

"Best friends? That only implicates you more. As his best friend you would likely know who his killer is, or perhaps have something to do with it…" She takes one step closer to me. "Trust me Arianna, I've been an attorney for sixteen years…when shit like this happens, the best friends are always to blame. It's like a mother abandoning her child. Where were you when your best friend was killed? Why wouldn't you know anything or anyone that would've wanted him dead? Calling yourself his best friend does not help matters, it only worsens it," she says. I feel it, I feel her. Was that the reason Mr. Langford had hoped having a best friend doesn't turn out to be one of the things I regret? Come to think of it, he said that the night Zack died, what if...no, I need to stop suspecting him. From what Prishka Singh has said, he has been protecting me.

"You said you've been an attorney for sixteen years…?" I ask and she nods. It's cool to be quite successful at an early age. "Do you think we'll win the trial?" It's more of a request than a mere question. She seems to be in her early thirties, and yet an attorney for sixteen years. It only proves she's more intelligent than she looks.

She takes a deep breath. "Once again, I'm Prishka Singh." She offers a handshake, and I fail to withhold my smile.

"Arianna Langford." I shake her hands.

Prishka Singh promised to do anything in her power to help me win the trial, and I promised to tell her everything she needs to know. After the meeting with Prishka Singh, I am allowed to go to my room and rest. I open the door to my room, step inside and close the door. 

I keep thinking about everything Prishka Singh had said. Is it true that having a best friend is as risky as climbing the top of a skyscraper? I trail to the floor and squat with my head down on my knees. I have no idea who might have killed Zack, does that mean I'm as bad as a mother who abandons her child?

"You really should stop blaming yourself," I hear a voice, which seems to be my inner consolation. Except the voice resembles someone familiar. I gradually raise my head. I'm shocked to see Jeremy sitting at my window.

"Jeremy?" I quickly stand up and turn on the light.

"Hi,"  he smiles. And I shake my head. How on earth did he climb my window? "I would have used the front door, but ummm…I'm too young to die," he says.

I laugh as I walk towards him. "I no longer have the strength to cry so you better not die," I say jokingly, standing in front of him. Damn it, why I'm I saying stuff like this to him?

"Was that your Attorney?" He asks.

"Yes," I reply as I sit next to him. "Did you get one?"

                       JEREMY.

Just like I expected, the death of Zack is bringing us closer to each other, but I don't think I can be able to have an honest relationship with her knowing I'm the reason she's in pain. I wonder what she'll do if she finds out I'm the reason Zack died. She'll probably kill me herself. She wasn't supposed to get involved, and I wasn't supposed to be on trial, but somehow the necklace ended up in her room, and I had to save her from having such an ill fate as Zack. The plan was crazy, and I had to go rogue the moment Arianna got involved.

Shit is my life from now on. I manage and climb up to her room. It has always been something I wish I could do since I was five. Climbing up to her room and spending the night together without anyone finding out. But I was too small and her room is 20 feet high, but luckily the drain pipes are helping. 

I waited for close to fifteen minutes. What's she doing downstairs? 

While I wait for her, I hear voices outside. I peep through her window and see Mr. Langford and his wife saying goodbye to a brunette in a suit and glasses. She is holding a thick black briefcase. She said something to Arianna's parents before entering her car. Mr. Langford and his wife watch until she drives to a certain distance. I did expect them to hire an attorney, but not Prishka Singh. What the hell is she doing in Stoneybrook? I settle down at the window, Prishka Singh is one of the most intelligent lawyers I know. She was the reason I got off juvie early. She was able to prove my innocence despite the CCTV camera. She narrated everything that happened even though she wasn't there. I had to beg her to keep my secret, she was kind enough to shorten my suffering. What are her reasons for helping Mr. Langford? Is she going to defend Arianna? If so, that means she'll be seeing me soon. Arianna gets inside, she looks wary. I caused that, and all I want is to make things right again. Two lives are gone, I can't do that.

"You really should stop blaming yourself for what happened," I tell her. She gradually raised her head, seeming shocked to see me. She sits next to me at the window. Maybe, just maybe I might have a chance with her. "Was that your Attorney?" I ask.

"Yes, did you get one?" She seems concerned.

"Have you met Delilah?" I ask. "She doesn't need an attorney to prevent me from going to prison again, she would rather die than let that happen," I say, and she looks at me skeptically. "Her words, not mine," I tell her, and she nods.

"She does care about you, I remember how she cried begging Mr. Langford not to let me testify against you, but Mr. Langford wasn't shaken by her tears," she says.

"What about you?" I ask, and she suddenly goes quiet. I at least deserve to know how she felt about me when she saw me stabbing Mikaela.

"I was still in shock, and I was young, I just did what I was asked to do." her voice is small. "If it makes you feel better, I did miss you. While going through the trauma of watching you stab Mikaela, I felt like you're the only one who could make it go away, and not because you caused it, but because…" she pauses and breathes in. "Because you were the closest person to me," She says. At least I know she misses me just as much as I missed her. 

"Zack was the luckiest person to have spent the last few years of his life with you," I say.

                       ARIANNA.

"Zack was the luckiest person to have spent the last few years of his life with you," he says. He might actually be the best consolation I can ever have.

"Thanks, but there are some people who see me as a mother who abandons her child," I tell him.

"Is it for the right reasons? Or is it for the wrong reason?" He asks.

"What is that?" I am confused.

"They are parents who give out their children because they are incapable of raising them, and they are some who do it for selfish gain. Meanwhile, You didn't abandon Zack, you only knew the things he wanted you to know. You are neither his mother nor is he your child," He preaches, and I smile.

"Thank you." My voice is small and fragile. I guess all I needed was someone who would give me reasons not to blame myself.

"It's almost like he knew he was going to die, that explains the reason why he had such a crazy party," I say.

"I thought he always had a crazy party?"

"He did, but not as crazy as treasure hunting?" I laugh.

"Come to think of it, was anyone able to find the treasure?" He asks.

"No. Was there even a treasure?" I ask, and Jeremy quietly stares at me, long enough for me to ponder about what just came out of my mouth. "Wait, do you think there was actually a treasure worth fifteen thousand dollars?" I ask him.

"I don't know. Would Zack joke about something like that?" No, he wouldn't. Zack was forcing me to join the hunt. If there wasn't any treasure he wouldn't have forced me into finding it.

"Do you think…"

"Maybe," he replies before I could complete my sentence.

"Okay." I stand up, then I turn to face him. "We need to find the treasure." I sound determined, ready to find Zack's killer.

"Are you sure you're ready for this? It could be a dangerous part."

"The most dangerous, but we're going to be convicted anyway. It's better to die trying than to do nothing," I tell him, and he nods.

I sleep with my eyes open. If Zack's treasure can reveal his killer, then I have to find it at all costs. The next morning, I get up from bed as early as 7 am. I brush my teeth, take my bath, and put on a jumpsuit. Just before I leave the house I make sure to inform my mom that I'm going to Zack's to check up on Cassandra, his mom, and she permits me. I linger outside my house hoping Jeremy would step out of his. I'm too scared to knock on his door. Mrs. Oscar had warned me not to come anywhere near her property, and if Mr. Langford catches me at the Oscars, I'll be doomed. If only I had his number I would have given him a call and let him know I'm waiting for him. "Arianna," I startle as I hear my name. Thank goodness it's my mom's voice. 

I turn around. "Mom," I utter.

"You're still here?" She asks, and I nod frighteningly.

"I was…uhm…it didn't feel right visiting someone that early so I decided to wait a little," I tell a lie.

"Why didn't you wait inside," she asks skeptically.

"Uhmm, well, I was already outside, it would be a waste of energy to go back inside and then come back outside, so…" she looks at me dumbfoundedly. "Okay, it's bright enough, I should go. See you later!" I tell her as I stride down the road. He said he was going to help find the treasure, did he forget already? Gosh, it doesn't feel right going without him. Finally, I get to the Freeman's. Standing at the front door, I don't know if I should just barge in or knock like a visitor. I'm not sure if I still have that right to barge into the house, Zack who gave me the privilege to do that is gone. I decided to knock. Two knocks and I hear footsteps approaching from the inside. 

The door clicks open and I see Cassandra standing in front of me.

"Um…hi." I raise my five fingers at her.

"Arianna?!" She smiles. "Come in here," she opens her arm for a hug, and I reluctantly hug her. "Why did you knock? The last time I remember, you love barging into people's houses," she says as she leads me in, her long flare gown raised a little with one hand. 

I pause, trying to figure out if that was an insult. "I'm sorry, that was never my intention," I say, and she turns to face me. She smiles, I can't tell if it's a good one or not. Thankfully the doorbell rings and distracts her from staring at me uncomfortably.

"Who would that be?" She asks, and I shrug.

She walks past me to the door. As I'm standing in the living room, a familiar scent, like burnt rubber, starts to permeate the air. The burner is blazingly on fire and appears to have other things burning inside of it. I wrinkle my nose and look at it. It smells so horrible that I plod toward it out of fear that it might be something harmful. It has been burned to ashes, and I can only recognize Zack's football he got from Ibrahimovic, his Idol. Then I realize that the basket next to the burner is filled with Zack's things. From his boxing gloves to his favorite sneakers, I can also spot the v-neck sweatshirt he got from someone I don't know in late January. He loved the sweatshirt so much that he wore it for three straight days. I squat to the basket. Even his recipe book on how to prepare Hot sauce and scrambled eggs is inside the basket. "What are you doing?" Cassandra's voice startles me and I immediately stand up and turn to face her. Surprisingly, I see Jeremy standing behind her.