DEPRESSION, OVERTHINKING

The next two days, things went back to square one, how she ignored him and how he didn't exist in her world.

On the third day, she didn't come to school which got Fang Haoyu worried.

Ai Meng on the other hand laid on her bed quietly as she sulked.

For the past three days, she hasn't had the appetite to eat. She felt lazy and didn't feel like doing anything. She continued lazing around for three weeks without going to school. Just bathing and laying on the bed. She turned her phone off so no one could reach her.

The doorbell rang jolting Ai Meng awake. She rubbed her eyes which had eyebags. She walked to the door. She used the peephole and saw that it was her father. After hesitating, she opened the door.

When Feng Huanzhuang saw his daughter in such a state, he felt his heart breaking.

Pa Ai Meng greeted as she stared at the floor.

Jing Feng Huanzhuang called in a particularly soft voice

Pa Ai Meng called as her voice broke but she refused to cry. Feng HuanZhuang hugged and sat her down on a chair as he squatted in front of her.

What's wrong? Feng HuanZhuang asked

Pa, was I wrong? Ai Meng asked

About? Feng HuanZhuang asked

My grandma died. She told me that she'll die early if I find the person destined for me. I never wanted to meet him; I only want my grandma but he just had to pop up. Ai Meng sniffed refusing to let the tears drop.

And Feng HuanZhuang asked

I just figured it out so I pushed him away. If he hadn't come to me, my grandma would still be around, she would be keeping me company but now she's gone. It's all his fault Ai Meng said as she buried her face in her palm.

Why do you think your grandma left you? Feng HuanZhuang asked

Because of him Ai Meng said

No, she has been holding up because of you. And she thinks that he's the person she can wholeheartedly give you to and die in peace Feng HuanZhuang said

But the doctor said she had a year left before she dies, if he hadn't arrived nothing would have happened, she'll still be here being a little hale and hearty now nobody is with me. It's really hurting in here Ai Meng said as she squeezed her chest.

Sometimes it hurts so badly, I can't breathe. Sometimes I don't even see the reason why I exist in the first place. Breathing is becoming an arduous task. I'm tired. It's all my fault that grandma didn't stay till the end of the year Ai Meng added

Feng Huanzhuang looked at her

Ai Ai something's wrong with you he said

I know. I know something's wrong but I can't tell what exactly Ai Meng said as she tried gasping for breath a little.

Calm down Ai Ai, I think you are depressed. We'll go see a doctor now. Have you eaten? Feng Huanzhuang asked

No Ai Meng shook her head.

When last did you eat something solid? Feng Huanzhuang asked

Three weeks ago. I don't feel like eating and most of the time, I throw up after eating. It refuses to stay down Ai Meng said in a whisper

Have you ever thought of dying or killing yourself Feng Huanzhuang asked her and Ai Meng kept quiet.

Are you taking something? Feng HuanZhuang asked and Ai Meng raised her head to look at him. Just then a wave of dizziness hit her and she fell unconscious.

At first, Feng HuanZhuang was shocked but he hurriedly came to his senses and picked Ai Meng up and walked to his car.

When he got to the hospital, the series of news he received shocked him.

Dad what's up? Where's she? Feng Sui asked as he breathed heavily

In there. They had to flush her system clean Feng HuanZhuang said as he looked at Ai Meng through the door.

Dad what happened? How'd she get like this? She was perfectly fine before she left Feng Sui asked worriedly

Well, the doctor said that she has been eating seafood and she's allergic to it. The poison accumulated and here we are Feng HuanZhuang said

And? Feng Sui asked as he looked at Feng HuanZhuang hesitating eyes

S…. She's depressed and it's weird Feng HuanZhuang said as he sighed

D….de…. depressed? Seriously, dad you have to tell me something else. I refuse to believe Feng Sui said

Then it's your choice. Feng HuanZhuang said with a sigh as he sat on the sit in the hallway.

Who's the boy? Feng HuanZhuang asked

You wouldn't want to know Feng Sui said as he sighed in desperation. Turns out she really holds him in high regard Feng Sui thought.

After three days and nights of staying in the hospital, Ai Meng discharged herself quietly and left to her grandma's house.

Not long after she was discharged, someone came to her house.

Coming Ai Meng's weak voice echoed as she walked to the door and saw Fang Haoyu dressed in all black clothing.

What do you want? Ai Meng asked as she leaned on the door.

Fang Haoyu looked at her pale skin, her eye bags and noticed her uneven breathing.

Ai Ai, are you sure you're fine, you look thin and I don't like it Fang Haoyu asked

If that's all then I have to close my door Ai Meng said as she closed the door.

Let's talk about it, It's really eating me up Fang Haoyu said

I don't want to talk Ai Meng said

Please just say everything. It's bothering me Fang Haoyu said with a pleading gaze. Ai Meng took a deep breath and looked at him before spewing three words.

I hate you She said and Fang Haoyu froze and blinked.

What did you say? Fang Haoyu asked

You heard me right. I HATE YOU. I'm tired just let me be Ai Meng said as she tried to close the door but couldn't due to the fact that she wasn't in her peak health conditions.

I don't believe you Fang Haoyu said

Then believe what you want, I don't care. Okay? Ai Meng said as her breathing shortened and they came in gasps

But I care Fang Haoyu yelled back

I want you to stay away from me. Far away from me you disgust me. I regret meeting and knowing you. It aches so much all because I met you, I opened up to you if not it wouldn't have ended like this, My grandma wouldn't have died, I wouldn't need to stay in the Feng family, I wouldn't have to bother about anything but it all changed when we started talking. I FREAKING HATE YOU, you ruined my goddamn well planned out life, and that's the truth. You've got what you wanted now go away Ai Meng said as breathing became more and more difficult.

Ai Ai, Fang Haoyu called as he picked up her thin and almost shriveled up body he frowned as he realized she wasn't weighty at all.

He took her to the car and Su Zhou drove them back to the hospital Ai Meng ran away from.

He hurriedly brought her out. It just so happens that the doctor who took care of her just walked downstairs.

Oh it's her again. Follow me, I told her it wasn't time to discharge but she refused. This Feng family young mistress is giving me that thing called headache. The most troublesome patient I've ever had in this life. The doctor said

She's been here before? Fang Haoyu asked surprised

She has been here for the past three days and then ran away today The man replied and the side of Fang Haoyu's lips twitched.

Then what's wrong with her? Fang Haoyu asked

Can't divulge, special case The doctor said. Immediately the elevator pinged, they walked out and Fang Haoyu laid Ai Meng on the bed.

The doctor gave her an IV and then walked outside. One hour later the Feng family came over. Kexin paced back and forth and bit her finger. Feng Sui helplessly glared at Fang Haoyu

What? Fang Haoyu asked

Nothing, it's somehow your fault. Feng Sui said

How? Fang Haoyu asked

Give her some space she'll come around Feng Sui said

Okay, I'll go away Fang Haoyu looked at Ai Meng and kissed her forehead.

Feng Sui glared at him and cut him to pieces in his heart before sending him off.

Immediately Fang Haoyu left Ai Meng opened her eyes and looked at Feng Sui who was just entering into her ward.

Feng Sui gazed at her coldly, Ai Meng could not help but hide under her duvet.

I can't believe you Feng Sui said in a calm but gentle voice.

You actually tried killing yourself, what exactly was the problem? What is it that is too hard to say? Feng Sui asked

You will not understand and I want to be alone right now Ai Meng said

Right. Always wanting to be alone. Have you thought of what the people who cares about you are going to do if you die? Have you thought of how Fang Haoyu is going to feel if you die? What would he do? What will dad do? What will I do? What will your grandma think? What exactly are we supposed to say? Feng Sui asked

You will not understand Ai Meng said

Not understand what exactly? That you feel like your grandma is your only reason for existence? Feng Sui asked

Nobody understands me? I'm a burden? Nobody wants me? You just pity me. You and pa never wanted me. The only person who wants me is dead. Everybody just wants to use me and see what I amount to. I am after all just a girl with no background to defend her Ai Meng said as she buried her head on her pillow

You want to kill yourself? Then go ahead I don't have a problem with it Feng Sui said as he glared at Ai Meng and walked out.

One-week later Ai Meng took her uniform and prepared to go to school. She was no longer slim but thin. All her bones where protruding and she felt weak but she had to write her exams so she could move to the university.

When Ai Meng got to class, everyone's attention was on her. Their peaked curiosity about Ai Meng was finally down. She was sick.

Look she's so thin One person said

What could have happened to her another one said

We should ask Haoyu he may know another said

Fang Haoyu could not help but frown at her.

So exams is much more important than her health? What the freak is wrong with her.

He impulsively wanted to reach for her but he had to hold back and then he turned around. Ai Meng didn't even notice him.

And so she passed the days like that for a week she continued like that.

On their last day of the exam, after writing, she walked out of school and called a cab. Just then, Feng Kexin came out.

S...s...sist? Feng Kexin called and Ai Meng turned to look at her she gave Feng Kexin a faint smile and just then, she fell unconscious.

Feng Kexin panicked. She first of all called the ambulance and then called her elder brother.

Brother Sui, it's sist. Feng Kexin said as her voice broke

I don't care Feng Sui said

Waaaaaaaaa…wuwuwu She fell unconscious in school Feng Kexin said crying

She went to school? Feng Sui said through gritted teeth as he held his phone tight as though he had the power to crush it.

Okay Feng Sui said

And the doctor said she needs blood if not sist won't make it passed the end of the month.......wuwuwu Feng Kexin cried and that got Feng Sui up from his seat.

He took his car key and hurried to the hospital on his way, he called Fang Haoyu who in turn left his house and drove to the hospital.

He and Feng Sui got to the hospital gate together. They looked at each other and jogged to the elevator.

So what happened? Fang Haoyu asked

I'm supposed to be asking you that? You were in school together with her what happened? Feng Sui asked

I don't know either Fang Haoyu replied. Just then the elevator pinged and they stepped out. When they got out, They head to Ai Meng's ward.

Just then they heard her making a call as she read a comic.

Mr. Doctor I told you already. The food irritates me. I'm going to throw up all over the ward. Ai Meng said in a weak voice. Her voice had lost all vitality.

Then just throw up. The food will stay there till you remember how food tastes like The doctor said

But......…I'm hanging up now The doctor said to Ai Meng

Wait, wait just tell Dr. Shin to come visit me whenever he's free Ai Meng said

No problem the doctor replied and then hung up.

Ai Meng looked at the fruits on her bedside and resisted the urge to throw up. She took the comic and read it seriously. Tuning the world out.

Feng Sui and Fang Haoyu entered the ward Ai Meng raised her slightly dazed eyes and looked at the intruders. She cleared her head and looked at them. When she saw Fang Haoyu, she was clearly shocked. Her gaze rested on him for a few seconds and then she turned away.

Hi guys Ai Meng said as she looked at the comic. Feng Sui took the comic from her hand, Ai Meng took another one from under the pillow, Feng Sui took that one again and Ai Meng brought another from under her pillow.

Feng Ai Meng Feng Sui called and Ai Meng looked at him

Feng Sui Ai Meng called back and Feng Sui's gaze darkened.

So you are not going to give it a second thought? Feng Sui asked a little hurt

What Second thought? My tummy refusing food is not my fault Ai Meng said as she turned away from him

It's not your tummy, its you, your mind is the problem. Feng Sui said and Ai Meng just clapped her hand before going back to ignoring.

Can you excuse us? Fang Haoyu asked Feng Sui with slightly red eyes. Feng Sui casually nodded and left.