Chapter:23
We ate our happy earth family organic tree bark and fat free/ salt free/ taste free soy mulch dinner and I worked out in the basement with Emmett afterward, still famished. We usually bullshitted during our workouts, but I wasn't too eager to admit my precarious predicament to him. Sometimes he could be a complete douche, and I knew very well what he would say. "Fuck her and don't get caught."
As if it was that easy.
So we talked about music and classes and I changed the subject when he asked me if I had seen Charlie's daughter with the great ass. And I don't mind saying how it was pissing me off that everyone was looking at, noticing, and now openly discussing her ass.
When we finished up in the basement, my father called me into his office as I passed his doorway on my way upstairs. I knew it was only a matter of time before he got a progress report call from Dr. Kate. What a little tattletale she was, calling my dad because I had a minor temper tantrum in her office. Even though she was bound by doctor/patient confidentiality, she was obligated to report my progress (or lack thereof) to my parents.
Gesturing to the chair in front of his massive desk he said softly, "Edward, please sit." He sat back, closing the lid of his laptop on the desk. I played innocent as I sat down opposite him, waiting to get reamed. I spent the better part of the conversation rolling my eyes and snorting at Carlisle at his rationale for expecting my cooperation. I knew he understood my side of the heated exchange as well as my actions in her office, but it was his role as a father foremost, as well as my doctor, to protect me. Apparently, behaving in a hostile manner to my court appointed shrink was not in my best interest.
Wanting to escape the room, coupled with the feel of the torturously hot leather under my thighs, was making me insane. I made an unenthusiastic promise to make a sincere apology to Dr. Kate at the next session. I took the opportunity to ask for some more Percocet's for my headaches, and Dad tentatively gave me six pills in a tiny zip lock bag. I knew he was hesitant about doing so, but truly there wasn't any reason to be…well, not really. With the exception of occasional alcohol and marijuana, I hadn't touched anything illegal since we made Forks our residence, but he was always cautious. I left, slumping to my room, pissed off yet again.
It was still relatively early, so after a shower, I vacuumed and dusted as usual, read another chapter of assigned English reading and worked on my History project. I peered out through the arched bathroom window to watch for Bella's bedroom light to go on. When it finally did, I headed outside, cigarette and lighter in hand.
She was in her room a while before she did her personal fashion show in front of the mirror. Outfit after outfit was slipped over her head, modeled and rejected, before the winning selection was chosen- some frilly red top and jeans, I think. The distance made anything from her waist down difficult to make out. She wore a black bra, and I imagined her in something lacy and feminine with matching panties. Uneventful.
After her lights finally went out, I headed back inside. Crossing the room in haste, I locked my bedroom door before I slid in between the cool covers and stuck my hand down my pajama pants.
Friday, school was uneventful up until fourth period English. I began to look forward to fourth period, for obvious reasons, but I always figuratively kicked myself in the ass when I ignored Bella's friendly smiles. She tried really hard, but gracefully brushed it off, and I wondered when it would start to trouble her, if ever, that I was such a complete dick to this girl when we weren't completely baked. Maybe she didn't even give a shit about my farce of indifference toward her, but by the way she tried to casually make conversation with me, I knew that was likely not the case.
The problem was that my plan of treating her as if she were nothing to me was such an outright lie, that it actually hurt me knowing that I was upsetting her.
I had it bad…and it had only been three days.
The one hundred I received on my English exam and the very approving nod it accompanied from the teacher elicited quite a reaction from Bella. It lingered in the forefront of my mind for the rest of the day, making me feel like shit. I caught her in my periphery nosily craning her neck in order to get a better look at my test score. When I noticed, I blatantly held the paper up to her with a very arrogant and sarcastic expression, as if to say, here…you wanna see, nosy girl?
She gave me a sarcastic thumbs up, looking away all red-faced. She was clearly embarrassed, and I immediately felt like shit. She didn't look at me the rest of the period, and thank God, because she would have seen me checking her out the whole time. My eyes were fixated on her stupid pink feather pen in which she was absently tracing along her jaw line as she took notes. I am sure my mouth was open wide enough that I could stick my entire foot into it as I gaped at her.
She didn't have a chance to make small talk in Bio, because Banner put on a film. In study hall, I immersed myself in geometry homework, then my English novel, and finally began scrawling random sentences on a sheet of loose-leaf, to make it appear as if I were completely occupied. Across the table, she got the hint, and did little more than look up when I coughed.
As Jasper and I headed to his car, I noticed Bella talking with a group of girls while Alice pouted with her arms crossed in front of her. Jasper caught Bella's attention, pointing to his watch and mouthing 15 minutes, but she shook her head no, motioning with a hand to her ear, which we understood to mean that she would call him. I kept my face blank as I wondered quite agitatedly, as to when the fuck they had exchanged phone numbers.
A half hour later, we were in the tree house, just Jasper and me, when Bella called to say that she was sorry she ditched us. Apparently Rose forced her to go into Port Angeles to shop. Through the phone, I heard her say, "I'll see you guys tonight," and, "Tell Edward I said hi." He relayed the message as he hung up and I shrugged and grumbled an incoherent, "Yeah whatever," while I smiled brightly on the inside.
She was coming to the beach tonight.
I only smoked a little, knowing we would be drinking later and not wanting the combined effects of the weed and alcohol to make me tired. Mom left a message that she and dad were going out to dinner straight from work, so I made myself a shitty fake soy peanut butter substitute and organic blueberry jelly sandwich on shitty 9 grain bread with a glass of shitty almond milk.
Jasper and I smoked up in the tree house and I had to say, it was not the same without Bella. Something was off. There was a heavy weight lingering in the air and I couldn't quite identify what it was, but I think we both felt it. Neither of us mentioned anything and kept the conversation light.
It was around nine thirty when we pulled into the crowded beach parking lot, near the concession stands. Emmett rode with us, which was a welcomed rarity. He usually went with the guys from the team but there was a game tomorrow and he didn't want to get hammered, so he offered to be our designated driver.
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